REVOLUTION - Story - Season 12 Commentary

This was an interesting season to log. Coming right after what seems to have been the last hurrah of mainline SSQ, this season is the downward motion which brings the plot towards the low it hits in Season 13. Unlike Season 13, however, it is very much alive and well, just slowly fading out due to some rather important issues.

Plot Summary

We start five years since the final death of The Void. The world is peaceful again and the old Questers were disbanded. However, Master Hand wanted to continue his Melee Match tradition. So he recalled the Questers of his own accord, branding them 'Brawl Questers' and then started up the fights like nothing had happened. A new Stadium with new rooms has been built, too.

The Questers were given their first new mission after taking some oaths not to, basically, repeat the mistakes of the past. They then went out and found a missing invitation to a tournament for Peach... it had seemed to be Bowser's theft but it turned out to be one of his minions who stole it after mishearing his master's orders.

The Questers picked up SIMBER along the way from the ruins of their old, destroyed HQ, and discovered it had been destroyed by strange Toads who had feared the existence of a 'Blue Void.' A litte time passed; one of the first tournament matches occurred. Peach defeated Wario in the first match.

The Questers are then brought along by Snake to deal with the Toads who, apparently, dynamited the old HQ into oblivion based on their irrational fear of The Void's return. Snake tries to teach them to be stealthy, but the Questers instead get through by Dis. Aster (a weird, clumsy blue Toad) tripping into paint and diplomacy. They discover the Space Pirates are to blame for some evil AI issues, and defeat a Space Pirate AI before leaving back for HQ.

Then some real weird stuff happens. First we see Ganondorf fight Jigglypuff; Ganondorf wins, but only by cheating. Digi tries to confront Lakitu over the tape of the cheating, but Lakitu deletes the footage! But before that can be dealt with, the Questers are recalled to do a mission. Snake briefed the group; Abe and Munch had sent a distress call from the planet Motavia, from the town Zema, in Birth Valley.

Of course, just as this went on some other crisis was going on in FF7-land; Cloud warped all the way into the Bigger Room to warn the group of this new peril, some kind of attack on his world by Robotnik robots. So the group split into equal groups and went to tackle BOTH problems SIMULTANEOUSLY.

Since this can only be written linearly, I'll start with the Motavia group.

The group landed in the desert and fought some Sligs, then bought items from a mysterious old man. They wandered into a strange cave. There, they found pipes pumping Mako... ..into Shadow the Hedgehog? They wandered further, and then encountered the Turks; of which they wound up fighting Reno and Rude. All seemed bad until Rika aided them. For they had apparently wandered into an old SEED complex. They then went with Rika down an elevator...

...And found the strange man again. The strange man then revealed himself to be Klumsy Koopa. He was explained to be still alive, because... apparently The Void had been COLLECTING old Questers and such, so he was actually in mint condition. He then explained how The Void made a much bigger mess than there had been before when he was destroyed.

Then the group moved on deeper into the place to meet up with Munch and Abe, which they did. Munch and Abe briefed them on how the Sligs n' Slogs n' Glukkons were up to no good. The group commented on how they were back together for the first time since Aribar's Oddessee... and then...

We switch to the FF side, which went on simultaneously as this one. The Questers on this side and Cloud warped on over to Midgar, which was looking as messed up as ever. However something newly sinister was going on, with Sligs rounding up prisoners from among the rebellious folk below the top of the city. So Cloud and the group attacked them, encountering the strange Robotnik robots to boot.

They met up with Tifa after all this, and planned to fight the 'new threat'--some sort of flying saucer way up above. Even more MEANWHILE this was going on, we see Rufus Shinra and... Gerald Robotnik?!?!? Yes. Gerald was apparently revived, found somewhere near SEED originally. Shinra was now working with Gerald to do some sinister takeover plan...

...Back to the FF group, they struggled their way up to the top plate of Midgar, where they were accosted by Mecha Shadow. One giant battle later, they then climbed up the remains of Shinra tower and leaped onto the flying saucer. But their toil wasn't over, as Mecha Shadow turned into NEO MECHA SHADOW, who then tried to finish them off. They fled into a vent, aaand...

...On the verge of both sides getting STRAIGHT INTO THE THICK OF THE NEW PLOT, everything... turned off. It was Snake. This was all... a holo-mission.


So, continuing on like that had never happened...

The group resumed their little plot with AI. They had just discovered the Space Pirates were doing somethin' funky, and Samus herself pointed out they were on some weird, deadly place named Oria. So the Questers loaded up and went there! Once there, they fought several corrupted Galactic Federation AI and shut down a trafficking operation dealing in making a gigantic AI which would overpower even the Galactic Federation... which was, supposedly, an 'isolated occurrence.'

Next up, Pikachu fought and defeated Link. The group then went on another mission... ..chasing some black market scene that had, somehow, stolen the AI cylinders that had just been recovered. The Questers went from place to place, eventually chasing their way to the 8-bits on the Space Pirate homeworld. There, they beat up Birdo and returned home... strangely without the cylinders. But... the cylinders were recovered anyway, by Ganondorf!

Ganondorf spoke of how he disliked the 'Old Questers' and was going to find them... before wandering off. Next after that was Mario vs. Luigi--Luigi got trounced into oblivion by Mario, to the cheer of the crowd. Only the Questers supported Luigi, who walked off, greatly disenchanted...

SIMBER had been back for a while, ever since that firstish mission. In his free time he found an old log Metal Man unwittingly made. It showed Metal Man travelling around... and an abandoned Eggman base. It just so happened that, in the present day, said base had Bowser walking in it? ...Yeah, SIMBER really was bored.

The group wandered on through the old base, encountering Bowser, who spoke of how he wanted a robot partner. They then found a crazy robot who was looking for ol' Eggman. They tried to show the robot Eggman was dead... but that crazy Eggman encrypted his mind in the recording of his death. Somehow. So the robot became Eggman... least, until the Questers blew it up, and caused the entire base to self destruct in their wake.

Next up, the group chose a mission from a marquee of sorts, and once again found themselves chasing Space Pirates. In the Earthbound town of Twoson. There, they found Jeff Andonuts... ..who had unwittingly aided the pirates with super-powerful warping devices. He wisened up once they told him the 411, and so he and the Questers went out and smashed apart yet another evil Space Pirate machine. Supposedly ending the threat they posed.

The group was really bored, so next they broke into some hidden part of HQ and found some weird new card technology. They found Dr. Light, who explained that Metal destroyed the original fighter remote and therefore the group needed to find the old pieces of it. Kuja himself apparently offered his help in the fighter remote situation, which was a bit strange.

The next mission brought us some more background. The Questers heard Jigglypuff's side of the story with Ganondorf cheating--Ganondorf had the aid of some kind of... book. Having forgotten about Wolfman's image of Ganondorf cheating, the Questers had to go find a fan with a camera who had recorded it instead.

So they did, getting it from Moustafa after fighting Slightly Rich Shoe Bandits in the desert. And Waluigi. For no reason.

Unfortunately, the tape didn't work in anything the Questers had on hand, so they enlisted the help of an old friend--Dave, from long, long ago, from hyrule. He led them to an old shed where they played the tape and got the down-low on Ganondorf fidgeting with his belt and cheating. They went to Master Hand, only to hear about Luigi being missing (as they had heard in the background earlier) and how Lakitu was about to escape. They also heard how Ganondorf had recovered the cylinders, though this had been all but confirmed earlier.

They caught up to Lakitu, but he nearly escaped, pending Ganondorf... blowing up stuff like crazy. Dave saved the day by capturing Lakitu in a pokeball, so the group ran to the explosions, only to discover... they were made by Giovanni, not Ganondorf! Giovanni attacked the Stadium with a massive Nidoking mecha, but in the end he was defeated and fled.

The damage was much worse than anticipated. With most systems offline along with SIMBER, the group had little to go off of. Luckily, they encountered Panzer for the first time in years, and then decided to go off to the crash site of the old Wing Fortress, to steal some parts to improve the Stadium with.

They made their way deep inside, only to discover a blue armored man. Or to put it properly, a blue armored guy. The BAG spoke of 'Klein Toys', some bizarre place in another world, and split the parts of the Wing Fortress with the Questers. Together, the Questers and BAG began rebuilding HQ--and Panzer rebuilt SIMBER.

HQ was rebuilt, partially, and armored, but now the group had to deal with Giovanni and their rather large, multiplying list of enemies. Their new foe was a sniper who somehow hit people with futuristic energy burns and shot notes attached to nails THROUGH people. He used phazon too... which turned out to be a pain as the phazon revived the corpse and caused a radioactive battle.

The sniper himself also returned to shoot at people, but Panzer eventually shot him in the visor, making him leave.

The Questers next went after Team Rocket, who had threatened death to the Questers and their HQ. They found the underwater HQ where Team Rocket had planned and executed the attack that crippled HQ and blew it up, freeing the scientists within. The fact that it had been hiding so close (near Peach's castle) made the find all the more freaky.

With Team Rocket gone, some fighting resumed as normal. Link fought Kirby and... nobody cared as they went off to Tallon IV to find Metal Man. They found a weird lil' hideout he had made on the dusty planet. And Metal Man, who claimed the Questers did nothing but create chaos. He sparred with them for a bit before they eventually told him the 411.

He spoke of Snake being unauthorized and how Master Hand had jeopardized the world with his refounding of the Questers. The Questers allowed him to come back with them.

So he appeared at HQ, only to get into a confrontation with Snake. He argued ceaselessly with Snake until he was eventually let in by massive public support for him over Snake and a dramatic statement. He got close to Master Hand and they argued some as well; Master Hand blamed some precursor called the 'N-team' for the problems of today, but Metal Man continued to threaten a court case over what Master Hand had done.

The Questers argued Metal Man's case and backed the Hand into a corner. The Hand snapped and spoke of the... purely monetary reasons he had illegally reformed the Questers... and gave in. The Questers then brought Metal back to the fore and all but fired Snake.

...Then Grodus appeared, claiming that Metal Man had completed some evil plan for him. Metal Man shot Grodus mid-monologue, then the Questers beat the tar out of him. They captured Grodus. Metal Man made no secret--he had been on the enemy team, but only because he thought the Questers had lost their way and had become evil. Their conduct had won him back, and as a result they together had ripped a hole in the seemingly unstoppable enemy forces that had been attacking them and the stadium.

Metal Man also revealed himself as the mystery sniper, water under the bridge as it were.

After then Metal Man decided to let the Questers choose instead of Snake. The group chose to go after Ganondorf directly; Julian believed he could deal with it, because after all, his golden rule ("I'm always right") had never been broken.

Ganondorf appeared in the Stadium and blew it up, soundly KOing Julian in the process. The golden rule was from then on irreversibly broken.

Shortly after that, they chose a more... careful approach... sneaking up on Bowser in Mute City, then tricking him with a zombie butler ruse. He was then warped to Peach's castle and captured by the Questers.

Metal next found a weird disc which would 'solve all our problems', but couldn't be decoded. Interested in decoding it, he sent the Questers to a trippy freakazoid world to get it decoded. They didn't get it, since supposedly their future selves found the decoder chip. Even worse, Ganondorf attacked them with some freaky magic and told them he had a master, and that Metal Man had served his cause until recently. (Like already said earlier...)

Still seeking data, Metal Man sent the Questers to Dracula's castle to get info on the disc, due to some coincidence with Dracula being around when the disc was made. The group found Dracula, who admitted to seeing the disc created when The Void died, but he knew nothing else. Then as if things were problematic enough, Ganondorf and the invincible 'Dark Master' attacked! Despite their great power, the Questers managed to hold them off, and they both left.

At the R&R again, Metal Man changed the channel until he hit Channel 51: there he got a message from... Area 51, by some Dr. Carrol. So naturally he and the Questers went out to see it. They were fine until a weird man named Trent Easton with a force field nearly killed them all with his attacks. They ran away and found Dr. Carrol, who told them about some malfunction with a Cetan Megawarp which had messed his world all up.

He then described the book everyone had been against so far--the Dark Prognosticus, a book which could destroy the future. Just as he did that, the Dark Master and Ganondorf appeared in front of Trent Easton. The Dark Master got shot and KO'd; Ganondorf stole the Dark Prognosticus and fled.

He then confronted the Questers, far more powerful than before. But wasted his powers on making weak opposites... so the Questers escaped. Frustrated... he was nearly attacked by Trent Easten to boot, until he and Trent decided to ally... against the Questers. And keep the 'Dark Master' locked away while they were at it, since he had just been KO'd.

Next up, the group heard of a bomb in Saturn Valley. They went out to stop it, but it exploded as they disarmed it. A ruse, apparently, for Ganondorf had Trent Easton send people to break out the Mushroom Kingdom's most nefarious criminal: Kamek. They beat up Kamek after accidentally aiding in his escape, but Kamek ultimately got away.

A new tournament was then declared by Metal Man, and Mewtwo returned to the Stadium. Snake was relegated to the role of weapons salesman. The Questers shopped n' stuff, and with Mewtwo's help, decided to go back to some weird library Deloth had gone to once before. After playing with some puzzles they found the mysterious 'Librarian' who ran it.

Turns out the flying library was all that was left of a turbulent hole that was the FF world, which had come to be ruled over by the 'Abyss weapon.' Also, Trent Easton attacked yet again with Ganondorf. Ganondorf attacked with an assault rifle and a helpful Kamek-sent enchantment but was ultimately beaten up, then hit by his own Prognosticus, which the Librarian turned against him for a split second. The Questers also gained the vast magic resources of the library, which warped into their HQ.

Metal and Dr. Carrol kept working at the infernal disk and the Questers were sent to get some space ships for a future mission. So they went... ...took one look at the facility which had the ships... ..and leapt into a deep pit instead?!?! At the bottom, they then activated the ship, only to be accosted by Trent Easton, who had followed them there. They revived the ship and then fooled around pointlessly while Kamui got BAG to help steal the ships using POD, completing the mission.

Unfortunately, they left Deloth behind, and he was kidnapped. So they returned to the ship and revived it fully this time--only to discover to their horror it was possessed by an ancient Venomian general who planned to take the universe for Andross. Even though it did free Deloth from Trent Easton's clutches. Even worse, after they killed the evil possessing program, they were attacked by Ganondorf and the Dark Prognosticus. The Dark Prognosticus wanted to use the ships to warp reality and give power to some 'Master of All', but Ganondorf overpowered it and caused the ship the Questers were on and all the other ones the old general program had summoned. The Questers barely escaped but survived.

Next, Metal Man, Professor Oak, and Dr. Carrol needed parts to build an anti-Dark Prognosticus machine, so the Questers fought their way through some war-torn part of Mobius, found a 'King Strider' and his... super-powered robotic subjects, and got the parts after a lot of fighting and arguing and becoming friends with 'King Strider.'

The machine made, the Questers went to deploy it, only to have been foiled by a counter-device which exploded upon being investigated. This explosion then blew up their device, ruining the anti-Dark Prognosticus plan. The group, disheartened, were nearly without a solution until E Li Three challenged them to a series of tests, through which they eventually earned another anti-Dark Prognosticus device.

It was near Christmas... ..and Grodus had escaped, leaving nebulous traces of 'Going to Viridian City' for the group to follow with SIMBER. The group went there, only to be accosted by strange lapses in reality and people becoming incorporeal. The group figured it out with Gary's help and blew up Grodus... and caused Trent Easton to trip over the extradimensional Old Man and wind up in another plane of reality, saving Deloth for the millionth time.

The reality adjustment device was finally fired off by Metal himself--despite Panzer's objections. Trent Easton objected himself, warping in and attacking after the device was activated. He got disabled, and Dr. Carrol adjusted the device. Trent made a last stand, warning of what Ganondorf would do if he was stopped. But it was too late, as Ganondorf vaporized Trent from behind.

Ganondorf made a threatening speech... ..then revealed he simply did what he did to stop the Dark Prognosticus. The Dark Master appeared, mocking everyone, and hurling lethal lightning at the reality adjustment device. Dr. Carrol sacrificed himself however, and the device was saved. The group with Ganondorf then attacked the Dark Master head on. As the device worked... ...the Dark Master lost his power.

He was revealed to be no more than an insane Luigi. The one who had lost earlier and then vanished. His master plot defeated, he fought until being beaten senseless. Next, Count Blech appeared to claim the boo--at least until he was one-hit killed. Ganondorf warped the book back to its home dimension and... that was a wrap.

And the Questers had a Merry Christmas after all that insanity. HOW I don't know, they just DID. @_@

Plot Analysis

Writing the summary for this season was painful. And not in the fun way where I go "Well duh, these logs are meant to not be connected." more like "How am I to put them next to one another and say "Yeah, this is continuous."" The plot went in 3 phases.
Phase 1--The failed Nick plot.
Phase 2--The annoying Space Pirate/AI plot.
Phase 3--The Dark Prognosticus/Evil Luigi, Metal Man, Ganondorf, Trent Easton, & the inexplicable disc.
It really should have been three SEPARATE seasons for each of these threads ignored the others' existence utterly. The first one tragically dying before its time, the second outliving the first in a mockery as it sucked by comparison, and the third finally booting the second out and giving us a medium-well done ending.

On the plus side it doesn't have a downer ending. Additionally, there are some wacky and shiny points here, most of them being in the ending, Nick's missions, and a few scattered far between them. Unfortunately, without any credible ultimate enemy, things went downhill, as reflected by this Season's name. Not to mention it takes place at such a distance from the past glory that it is faded.

Of course, the real tragedy is Nick's missions dying so early. There it was: Aribar's Oddesee back from the death for us all to enjoy. Klumsy has even returned. It was sort of a nostalgia trip which had never been thought possible. Then... it all went to pot. In meta-plot terms, The Book curb-stomped the thing because Klumsy had, in truth, warned about a real danger--The Void's death had unravelled things such that, left unchecked, the world would explode. And explode it did, in Season 13. So we can look at this season as where a perfectly good warning being ignored leads to dire circumstances.

Prototypical SSQ^2 influences appear here; I begin letting in new things. But it is mostly amatuerish and second-place to the more powerful themes of books. I also abused Space Pirates too much--this season seemingly reflected more what I was currently playing than any coherent plot. Which is a bit of a shame, because it has more potential than the dry schlock that occurred in Season 13.

In the end despite saying so many words there is little to be said besides what I've intoned already. This season combined the rich temptation of the full-bore, legendary SSQ of old with the dry, meaningless random gibberish of the last bit of SSQ 1, which ultimately left us all with a bad taste in our mouth. The sort of taste which led to Season 13 and The Book.

This plot also marks the last appearance of many major people, including Klumsy. Hence you can easily call it the curtain call; anything which stays is closer to riding into SSQ^2 than really riding the SSQ 1 train, for by the end it has sailed... having been disabled or defeated by the dramatic deus ex machina-ending super machine.

Here we can also see the lack of major villains causing everything to go downhill, and yet ANOTHER instance of the 'dead tournament plot.' Sure, there was a tournament, but it was such a boring thing we ignored it and it ceased to occur. Indeed, the Questers themselves demanded it be cancelled until Ganondorf was done with.

What was also interesting was the Snake replacement of Metal Man. And with it, the new system. The new system brought a large variety of Melee Moves into play, but ultimately was rejected because of no customizability. Similarly, the Questers ICly revolted against Snake when given the chance and Metal Man rode to victory atop the Questers' shoulders.

Snake would never have an important role again, and unfortunately for Nick, who had helped inspire this season, neither his original plot, nor his system, nor even the ideas he had survived. Unfortunately for us all, too, for I really needed just a lil' more time to develop my own style from here.

Had there been a successful Final Phantasy, I'd be writing this commentary under vastly different circumstances.

Still, that's all a What-if, and one can't really change the players of SSQ. Ultimately they chose and they won, so it was for the greater good. Besides--Nick's system remains... simply grafted at the hip with the ancient but unstoppably durable #meh system of custom moves I originally made a whopping 7 years ago (as of this date--in 2009.)

I look forward to the next season, for it shall bring to the fore the true Climax of SSQ (well, the seasons I more or less created that is) and move us out of even trace elements of the downward roll that occurred in this season and Season 13.

Oh, and Nick did design the evil Luigi plan. That survived. More or less.

Word Map (Made by Wordle)

Dragoshi's name dominates yet again. Here, however, the concept of what a Quester is moves to the forefront. It is flanked by Questerly concepts like Metal Man, Ganondorf, Deloth, Bowser, and Aribar. SIMBER, the intrusive and yet one-dimensional NPC I used to overuse, also hides in the side, with Kamui, the guy who stupidly got himself akilled from the server later on. Wolfman, Panzer, Digi, and Julian are in the periphery, with doors and Solid Snake. Snake's loss to Metal Man is made obvious by Metal Man's name being several times larger than his. Thinking is more important than warping here; it is clear this Season is trying to be something more than mindless moving about.

However, it doesn't make a very clear picture of it, and so, only a hazy after-image can be seen from the word map. The main enemy is nowhere to be seen, as it was never really mentioned much; more of an afterthought.

Cast (In order of Appearance)

Wolfman - Ex-Leader of the Questers - Goomba Gatorade Drinkin' Mako Denier
Chancé Lucent - Quester - "New... Quester... #2???"
Digifanatic - Quester - Match Announcin' Guy
Dragoshi - Quester - Weak against Playground Slides
Deloth - Quester - Still Has Nightmares About that Tower
Professor Oak - Quester HQ Staff - Long-suffering Assistant
Aribar - Quester - One-armed Blue Shirt Wearer
Peach - Smasher - Invitation Loser
Bowser - Smasher - Sneaky Old Turtle
Koopa - Koopa Troopa - Car Stealer
Smash Dex - Smash Dex - Some Title which does not just say "Smash Dex"
XaoShi - Quester - Short-lived 200 feet Sprinter
Metal Man's Answering Machine - Answering Machine - Please call back in 1006 years!
SIMBER - Quester HQ AI - Sly Commentator
Toad - Construction Worker - Afraid of Step Brothers
Toad2 - Construction Worker - Doesn't Know Where that Two Came From
Dahl - Quester - Two-Decade Vacationer
Rika - Quester??? - Sparkly Eyes of Lateness

Aaron Sarasa - Quester - Illogical Kin of Daisy
Wario - Smasher - Bomb Thrower
Snake - Some Guy who Does Stuff at Quester HQ - Unwanted Help
Guard - Construction Security - Dislikes Construction Sites
Dis. Aster - Construction Toad - Manifestation of Bad Luck
Toad1 - Construction Worker - Doesn't see anyone
Toad3 - Construction Worker - Blames it all on Dis. Aster
Holo Space Pirate - Space Pirate Hologram - Entire Building is designated as an intruder

Ganondorf - Smasher/Villain - Dirty Cheater of Doom
Jigglypuff - Smasher - Inexplicable Victim
Lakitu - Quester HQ Staff - Evil Tape Erasin' Match Announcin' Guy
John - Quester - Hates Old Men
Abe - Holographic Oddworld Person - HORRIFYING YELLOW EYE
Munch - Holographic Oddworld Person - Amateur Photographer
Glukkons - Holographic Oddworld Thugs - Chain smokers
Cloud - Holographic ex-SOLDIER - Likes Onions
Tifa - Holographic AVALANCHE member - Help Requester
Alex Fender - Quester - Freaky Guy Introduced in a HOLO MISSION
Sligs - Holographic Oddworld Thugs - UGLIEST GUYS ANYONE HAS SEEN
Klumsy Koopa - Holographic Quester - Strategy Guide Reader
Charizard - Holographic Pokemon - Sorta Inexplicable
Shadow - Holographic Genetic Project - Never Wakes Up
Slogzilla - Holographic Oddworld Monster - Confused Eater
Heidigger - Holographic Shinra Goon - Hides Just Off Screen
Scarlet - Holographic Shinra Goon - Wants people to Go
Reno - Holographic Shinra Goon - Taser Stick Attacker
Rude - Holographic Shinra Goon - Fist-thrower

Trigger - Quester - Inexplicable Returned 'Nintendo Master'
Robots - Holographic Robotnik Machines - Shoot Electric Caps
Mecha Shadow - Holographic Gerald Machine - Faster Than Sanity
Gerald Robotnik - Holographic Invincible Madman - JUST STAY DEAD ALREADY!!!
Mr. Shinra - Holographic CEO - Planet Blood-Stealer
Phamacy Kid - Holographic Shopkeeper - Too Young To Use Any Of His Own Drugs
Old Man #1 - Holographic Shopkeeper - Makes Tanks Jump
Julian - Quester - Tank Wonderer
Neo Mecha Shadow - Holographic Gerald Machine - Now He's Really Mad!

Samus - Smasher - Hates Dem Space Pirates
Evil Corrupted GFS AI #1 - Corrupted GFS AI - Kafein' Za ERROR!
Evil Corrupted GFS AI #2 - Corrupted GFS AI - Cheeto-Eating God
Elite Space Pirate - Space Pirate - Ate His Wheaties

Pikachu - Smasher - Elf Thrower
Link - Smasher - Pavement Toucher
Captain Falcon - Smasher - Losers don't do milk!
Don Cortega - Shady Businessman - Puts Tracking Devices in Pineapples
??? #1 - Who knows? - Newspaper reader
Shop-man - Hyrule Castle Town Shopkeep - C-buttony
??? #2 - Futuristic Pig Shopkeep - Has Killer New Weapons
??? #3 - GFS Shopkeep - Flippy Tracking Devices?
Birdo - 8-bit Thug - Won't Give Up
Mario - Smasher - Smug Annoying Plumber
Luigi - Smasher - Unlucky Loser

Metal Man's Log - Dex Program - Yes, No One Found Him Yet
Egg Pawn Pile - Old Robotnik Robots - Make Weird Noises
Robot - Crazy Eggrobo - Robotnik's Left Left Hand Man
Eggman? - Possessed Crazy Eggrobo - Eggman's Attack Never ends, Does It?

Receptionist - Twoson Department Store Employee - Hideous Track Finder
Jeff Maxwell Andonuts - Ness's Old Friend - Naive Techno-Fixer

Voice - Stadium Defense System - Not A Good Riddler
Scanner - Stadium Defense System - Authorizes Dangerous Crates
Bomb card -New Quester Tool - Why Does It Talk???
Dr. Light - Stadium HQ Staff - Mr. Do-Anything

Valentine Kilmer - Quester - Claims not to be a Quester
Bandit - Slightly Rich Shoe Bandits - Wants Elf-Skin Boots
???1 - Desert Hallucination - This Happens All The Time
???2 - Desert Hallucination - Martians Must Be Punched?
Moustafa - Desert Nomad - Unauthorized Videotaper
Waluigi - Unemployed Jerk - Has Waluigi Powers

Dave/Dan - Old Quester Ally - Fix-it Guy
Kamui - Quester - Panzer's Favorite Target
Master Hand - Stadium Power-that-is - Out of Touch
Giovanni - Evil Mobster - Stadium Wrecker

Panzer - Quester - Back From Several Year Hiatus
Vanessa - Some Time Knight Thing - Nobody Knows
Aiden - Time Kn--err, Quester - Late Due to Epic Battle Against Michael Jackson
BAG - Klein Toys Leader From Another Dimension - Makes Foolish Flesh Creatures do the Fire Dance

Dr. Mario - Stadium Staff - Evil Embezzler Doc
GF Envoy - Galactic Federation - Helpless Helper
GF Scientist - Galactic Federation - Specializes in Compounds
Mystery Sniper - ??? - Amateur Terrorist

Toad - Princess Peach's Retainer - No, NOT THAT OTHER ONE I MENTIONED EARLIER. This one... does nothing.
Scientist - Silph Co. Employee - Rocket Disruptor
Metal Man - Unfindable Former Quester Leader - Wannabe Lawyer
Illusionist - Quester - Or Maybe Just a Pile Of Dirt?

Grodus - Dome-Headed Moron - Refuses to Stop Failing

E Li Three - Neverending Trap Master - Electric Radishes Actualize Greenly!
Kuja - Random Cameo of the Past - Bored Or Something
Zelda - Smasher - Wouldn't Want to Lure Bowser

Agknot - WTF?!?! - His name is the letter 'Bob' in his language?

Ninja - Quester - Sold Holy Water to Start a Restaurant
Dracula - Old Quester Arch-Enemy - Saw The Void Die
Dark Master - Dark Prognosticus Abuser - Annoying Lil' Jerk

Dr. Carrol - Datadyne Prisoner - MegaWarps Are Bad For You
Trent Easton - Corrupt NSA Man - Hates Eeeeveryone
Soldier - Area 51 Guard - Technology Hates Him
Orc - Aribar's Opposite - Wants Elf for Breakfast
Woman... Person... Thing - Dragoshi's Opposite - Doesn't Do Much
Englishman - Alex's Opposite - Subtle Poisoner
Football Jock - Digi's Opposite - Wants to Kick Nerds
Shadow Aribar - Unending Slytock Clone of Aribar - Escapes Yet Again

Mr. Saturn A - Illusion - 1337 $|>34|<3|2
Mr. Saturn B - Illusion - Binary Opposition
Man - Trent Easton Lackey - Doesn't Wanna Die
Mr. Saturn - Weird Earthbound Thing - DoEs NoT kNoW
Koopa1 - Prisoner - Gonna Hurricane You
Koopa2 - Prisoner - Toad Burner
Man #2 - Trent Easton Lackey - Actually Blocks Stuff
Kamek - Bowser's Tutor - After 20 Years, I am Freeee!

Wario - Smasher? - Sells Stuff
??? #4 - TV Person - Save us Razorx!
Razorx - TV Person - OMNI DEATHRAY
Dr. Elian Botnik Wily - TV Person - Everything Combined Together, Stupidly
Toad News Announcer - TV Person - Interference detected!
Announcer - TV Person - Beer Pusher
Feint - Quester - Questionable Potential Kamui Clone
The Librarian - Ancient Library Keeper - Knows His Stuff

Mewtwo - Stadium Staff - Back For No Reason
Selrac - Crazy Ship Hologram - Acid Reflux Disco
Soldier - Car Lot Guard - BAG Victim
Soldier2 - Car Lot Guard - Unsure of Questers' Sanity
Tank Man - Trent Easton Lackey - Likes to Blow Things Up?

General - Andross Lackey - Has An Evil Plan
Dark Prognosticus - Doomsday Device - Wants to Empower Some Guy Far Away

GUN Scientist - On A Video - Killed By Robot Apocalypse
Gerald Recording - On A Video - Never Gonna Give You Up
King Strider - Robot Project - Why did they make him a King, again?

??? #5 - E Li Three Obstacle - Similar To Another Blue Person
Smithy - E Li Three Obstacle - In Bad Shape
Computer - E Li Three Obstacle- R@#!(!#TRN@TIOT$NYOMGBBQ$@!I#B!T#!!T!!

Old Man #2 - Viridian City Guy - Reality Corruptor
Gary Oak - Gym Leader - Wants More Cheerleaders
Nurse - Viridian City Pokecenter Staff - Knows too Much

World-Saving Macguffin Box #2 - World Saving MacGuffin - Panzer's Only Friend???
Count Blech - Fall Guy - Dies for his Prognosticus
??? #6 - Credits Guy - Who?
Jesse - Team Rocket Loser - Thinks Bowser is in the Salvation Army

Final Notes

This was a rather long and chaotic season. Again my thanks goes out to Nick, since he made the system. Wolfman also aided in working on programming stuff which we use in one form or another today. With this completed, the first logs of the actually 'Melee' Questers shall begin. Look forward to The Void and Charles and Glyph's character... in the next series of logs.

Additionally, hang in there, I will eventually do the SSQ^2 logs...