REVOLUTION - Story - Season 6 Commentary

Millions of years in the making, but finally complete, Season 6 brings with it both the best and the worst that the old days had to offer. It is neither the best nor truly the worst, making it a weird mid-point that helped shift the game away from robotic video game references to weird and confusingly written original characters.

Plot Summary

The Questers returned to Nintendus after 10 years. There, Sardis Mongul the Solarian told them Kuja had taken over. Then the Stadium that they had appeared in was apparently slated for demolition and Denon's men were attaching bombs to it. The Questers let slip that they were, in fact, the Questers, and the demolition worker notified the world of their return. The foreman ordered the demolition men (who were just Denon Soldiers, anyway) to kill off the Questers. Instead, though, the demolition men were killed. The Foreman attacked with a big mech, only to be beaten up as well. So Denon decided to announce yet again that the Questers needed to die, over the radio.

However, this was a part of more, as the Archelago II, Denon's flagship, came by to blow up the Quester HQ. The Questers had to fly their CACs into his ship, and after messing with the space time continuum, actually destroyed his laser cannon. Aribar and Aetos tried to take out SkyHigh (who was demoted after his loss on Turion) but SkyHigh of all people managed to get the upper hand and defeated them. Still, the day was saved... even if SkyHigh got away free.

The Questers went to figure out more about what was going on by visiting a nearby Kuja base. There, Grodus, another Commander of Kuja's, was researching dangerous Magitek crystals. After more reality warping battles, and an assist from Ganondorf, though, the Questers destroyed the base and chased Grodus off. However, SkyHigh showed up again, and even went 'Magitek', before finally also being shoved away... and thus, the Questers obtained a bunch of crates of Magitek and little information on what was actually going on.

Metal Man figured out that the head communication area was right down the way. So he sent the Questers there, and they went to the Lon Lon Ranch. Which was now a technological wasteland populated by another Kuja Commander... Maximillian. The Solarian was there, alongside Kuja himself. Kuja bragged of the power of his Magitek and his new system, and the Questers only escaped by the skin of their teeth--and only due to Ivan Robotnik hacking the machine Kuja and Maximillian were using to hold the Questers inside the ranch against their will.

After that, the Questers marched to the ruins of Eisnaught to pick up Ivan Robotnik and his 2000-strong fighting force. There, they discovered the Commanders of Nintendus were Maxamillian, Lashiec, Denon, Meier Link, Gerald Robotnik and Grodus. Also that Ivan Robotnik had to leave Eisnaught--it was too big to defend against the wrath of Denon. Speaking of Denon, he came by to attack while the group slowly fled. Meier Link showed up to try and stop the escape, only to be defeated ignominously by Charles' Star Rod revive power. Kuja's ships flew in to destroy Quester HQ shortly after; a last ditch mission where the Questers used the new anti-magitek weapons to break into Maxamillian's base occurred, and the Questers... used their three chaos emeralds to warp Kuja's fleet (well, the portion targeting them)... into the sun, using Maxamillian's own Magitek dish against them.

Ivan led the Questers to then go get more upgraded weapons, because the force field Kuja had made with his weird dish system had made their old weapons useless. He sent them into the basement to go put the old weapons in a safe first, but E Li Three was there and ended up challenging the Questers to do a challenge to get a reward instead. Coincidentally, Metal Man was outside and ambushed by Shadow, who handily beat him up, then handed him an emerald and told him to Chaos Control over to where Klumsy's tomb was. Coincidentally even more, Aribar showed up and randomly was told by E Li Three to go to opposite-world Nintendus (I refuse to spell it backwards--too annoying) to go get some sort of anti-matter remote. Since it was anti-Nintendus, the Quest was actually quite short and easy to complete for Aribar. (Insert laugh track here)

The Questers then finally went over to Klumsy's tomb. Turned out that Klumsy had been hiding the whole time, as Kuja intended to do him in. He helped the Questers by giving them the Platinum Challenge--a monotonous Challenge in which they had to fight over 30 bosses from the past. Over and over and over. Even with two Questers at a time, it was a doozy. (6 Chapters worth, no less.)

While this went on, Kuja went to the Castle frozen in time, Pandemonium, and then made a bunch of dire statements and summoned evil things, including a dragon that he sent towards Quester HQ that nobody ever actually saw and never did anything. Huh. Meanwhile, the Questers kept fighting bosses.

And more bosses.

And even more bosses.

Then, the group was fighting a bunch of Sligs, only for Metal Man to vanish, and be replaced by a strange invisible man who told the Questers about the Heartless and other dimensions. He rewrote reality to help skip the group ahead a couple challenges, as the group had been stuck endlessly fighting in the Platinum challenge for a while now. After more mindless fighting, the group encountered the mysterious Nobody again. This time, he and Metal Man argued about the nature of reality. Nothing made any sense, potentially because while the Nobody was on to something, what he was on to would only happen many, many, many years past this season, and not even the way he suspected it would. Finally, after a bunch of bickering, Sephiroth himself finally showed up, one of the first challenges in the Platinum challenge that actually were somewhat (but not really) relevant to the plot.

The Questers beat Sephiroth up in short order, but the weird invisible man showed up again. This time he revealed he had helped the Questers cheat ahead so they could destroy Sephiroth and steal his sword to gain a keyblade. However, this whole thing was ruined by Aetos stealing it instead. The invisible man said he was Metal Man, only to then be rebuffed by Metal Man that he was not. As such, the crazy invisible man said he really was Nobody, and then vanished away while laughing maniacally. Then the Questers completed the challenge and gained the Chaos Emeralds from Klumsy. Klumsy noted that he'd... stolen them from Kuja himself, an act of bravery that, sadly, was never fully recorded anywhere. (Would have probably been awesome to read.) The Questers went on their way, ready to take on Kuja some more.

The group began their return to fighting Kuja with going to Denon's base to destroy his Archelago II as well as a giant deathray he intended to blow up HQ with. This degenerated into what was one of the more annoyingly long fights, as the Questers fought dozens of Supersoldiers. They defeated them and ran into the base, where they were about to fight another million Supersoldiers, only to be interrupted by an explosion and Sardis Mongul's notebook page landing where the Supersoldiers were going to be. Denon laughed dryly over the base intercom and went to launch, having had enough of these shenanigans. As the Archelago went to launch, the Questers ran around inside his base, completely lost. They continually got stabbed by spikes and other fun things.

Eventually, Denon bizarrely decided to let them through the maze by turning it off entirely. The Questers got aboard the Archellago II and then confronted him in a grueling battle. After a lot of floor panels got thrown around and Metal Man got beamed aboard and then laser beamed back off again, the Questers eventually defeated Denon, but not before discovering that he was some sort of enslaved Solarian who had seen his people killed by Kuja. Sky High blew up the Archellago II using Denon's own deathray (the one from the base) and the Questers escaped using Denon's ships in the hanger, but everything that happened just left them with even more questions...

Of course, those questions would seemingly never be answered. Instead, the Questers were sent to go 'undercover' into a Kuja-occupied town, Port Destiny (or, knowing Kuja, it was probably renamed Port Kuja), which Aetos interpreted as 'call Zorn and Thorn to kill the Questers with a Kuja-brand cellphone while shoplifting.' While Julian actually focused on getting underwater and remaining undercover, Aetos ran around screaming and being attacked by tanks and space ships and his own lack of intelligence. Other Questers ran from tanks and/or attempted to try to save Aetos from his own stupidity, with varying results. After that, Julian found and looted some ancient Solarian undewater breathing necklaces and actually got everyone underwater, on the way to what was apparently some sort of Grodus Magitek factory...

Once down there underwater, more stupidity occurred. Aetos summoned the 13 Gentleman Androids by pushing a button in a submerged Egg Carrier and with it, also got Kuja's wrath against him... yet again. The other Questers left in disgust while Aetos decided attacking invincible Androids was a great idea. Julian, Spyke and co. fled from Aetos' idiocy, only to encounter a freakish Magitek Vial Monster that had a hairdo made out of Magitek Vials. The Questers beat that thing up, and after Aetos and Nodal died from the Androids, they caught up with the rest. Then Doopliss attacked yet again, and the Questers beat him, causing him to reveal he wasn't fully on Kuja's side before he then left. The Questers blew up the Magitek factory to then close out their visit.

Next, the Questers wanted to break into 'Dark Exor', a super-force fielded base that Grodus had. But they couldn't get in, so instead they flew all the way North to the Magnetic Wastes to break into Garrick's old haunting ground, the base where Nova was. After a perilous CAC ride in Metal's limo, they crashed in the dust and broke in, only to find Kuja had taken over the whole base. A tense fight began as Kuja sent everything he had to destroy the base, and all they managed to make in time was 'The Dauntless'--a strange ship that was designed by Garrick, but actually implemented by Metal Man. It looked a lot like a flying V/Wing Fortress in the end, perhaps because you should never trust Metal Man to 'make a ship without weird crud attached to it.' Meanwhile, Charles began working on breaking into Dark Exor, using his mind instead of his rage. This ticked off some evil side of himself that had been living inside the Emerald he had the whole time... weird.

The Dauntless flew up to Dark Exor, and soon a bizarre fight between it and Grodus began. The Questers rammed the force field and failed to get in, then shot an X-Zone beam and nearly blew it up. Grodus used Exor to fire an X-Zone blast ala Season 2, but the Questers used the aid of Charles Magellean to figure out that instead of shooting the X-Zone blast, they should use the Chaos Emeralds. They released... something... from the Emeralds in the process, but also destroyed the X-Zone Blast using Chaos Control. Grodus was furious.

The Questers got inside and began wandering around Dark Exor. Some dodged robots; others got shot by them. Whatever the case, Julian encountered Grodus and put C-4 on a crucial structure. Then Grodus revealed some dire prophecy about the world being in danger and how things were no longer under control--not even by him. He even helped the Questers escape... as dire laughter and the C-4 destroyed the Dark Exor tower, leaving more questions than there were answers. Who was the mysterious laughter? And what was all this weirdness about? The Sardis page that arrived in Charles' hands shortly after didn't really clarify matters. It just blamed Charles' block-everything shield that the Dark Exor had been using until the 'something' was released from the emeralds.

The Questers next went to rescue the Mushroom King. Or what they thought was the Mushroom King. They followed his 'suggestion' to go to Hyrule Castle, where Kuja showed up and immediately bragged that he'd fooled the Questers. However, a mysterious voice told the Questers to use the Chaos Emeralds and positive memories to block Kuja. Once blocked, Kuja ran away. The voice was revealed to be Meier Link, who apparently only wanted vengeance for years ago--hence he didn't want Kuja stealing his kills. He sent Aetos after the Questers using ancient magic, but it failed, so he banished the group to the underworld... ...the same one the Mushroom King had been talking about in the fake distress call, for some reason.

The 'underworld' was actually the X-Zone... an upside-down version of the world the Questers had been warped from. The Questers proceeded through said world, fighting a set of Apocalypse Group leaders (*shudders from the reminiscence of Season 3*), then dodging the highly powerful but blind Jokercube. They found inside an upside down Taj Mahal-like castle, the Mushroom King. Who granted a bunch of meaningless boons and then let the Questers go home, ending that awkward and fairly unimportant series of events. Oh, and Aetos got mad over a laser gun a virtual Robotnik wielded and dropped when Julian killed him, causing him to idiotically punch Julian. This would be avenged not too long after... for Julian never forgot this.

Indeed, not too long after, Julian beat up Aetos and Megaman with his team of himself and Game and Watch in an official Super Smash Stadium-style battle. Then, they went to get some information on Meier Link from the Great Deku Tree. Kuja didn't make it easy. The entire way there had been blocked by rivers of lava, barbed wire fences, and minefields. Once they did get there, the Deku Tree said Meier Link was buried nearby, sealed with a gem. The gem turned out to be... the Kokiri Emerald. The Questers went to go see what was down the path, when instead they encountered that strange phantom being again. The being revealed itself as Dark Metal Man (original name, I know) and then began beating the tar out of the Questers. He had magical armor that repelled most attacks, and only lost because he misused the Kokiri Emerald. He chucked the Emerald to the Questers and fled, swearing to get the Goron Ruby first... and the Questers went back to HQ to recover from the beating they got.

Next, the Questers went to the ruins of Eisnaught, after Lord Crump told them there was a 'potential ally' there. Instead, all they found was the future of Nintendus and a trap by Ivo Robotnik, which caused them to accidentally help Ivo steal something. Something important. The Questers had to go back in time and accept that they'd been tricked, lest they break reality. But at least their trip into the future confirmed that Kuja was dead! ...Then they actually found their erstwhile 'ally', and it turned out to be SkyHigh, of all people.

After that they went after the Goron Ruby. Or I should say, the Ruby of Morons, because a lot of stupidity occurred on their way over. They went through a confusing mess of Tektites and Eggman machinery left on Death Mountain, while being accosted by the mysterious Dark Metal Man again. They barely escaped his robo-Tektites and then went past an array of confusing machinery into the heart of Death Mountain, where the Ruby awaited. However, there was also a magma pit, and also Dark Metal Man yet again. Dark Metal Man possessed Julian and began to make him kill himself using the Magma Pit; the Questers mostly ran around screaming like idiots while this happened. The Ninja eventually landed atop of Julian's head, helping things none. Then, Sky High came, as if attracted by the idiocy, and dropped a giant block on Julian's head, accidentally freeing him from Dark Metal Man. (Although Sky High pretended that he wanted to save 'an innocent Quester' we know that's pretty unlikely.) The Questers chased off Dark Metal Man with Julian's Vendetta, and then the Questers obtained the Goron Ruby. And then left, vowing not to do anything that ridiculous again.

They then went to grab the Zora Sapphire, which was a rather easy task. All they had to do was defeat a vampire, then gain access to Zora's Domain... which had become Valhalla Domain due to Charles' ship crashing into it because Doopliss flew it there while fighting Kuja. They got inside and the computer accepted a trade: the purple Chaos Emerald to keep it 'alive' while it would give its power source, the Zora Sapphire, to the Questers. This was all very smooth, but Dark Metal Man was inside Julian's body the whole time and decided to steal an emerald AND the Sapphire. Functionally invincible, he ignored everything: Lasers, punches... his own weakness to being shocked by a giant electrode... ....the Questers lured him into shocking himself to death and he exploded, hurling the objects aside and vanishing. Because he had no memories, he had been unable to Chaos Control to safety. And so the Questers returned home, victorious.

And at home, they then encountered none other than Vladimir Va'Ruushka, vicious soldier of Ivan Robotnik. While supposedly an ally, he did nothing but insult Questers. Only Charles seemed to see him, though, until he suddenly became real and beat up Julian with exploding radioactive power cores. Charles eventually had to go "Super" to fight him, but he ALSO became "Super." The two fought until suddenly the Vladimir got 'tired' of it all and vanished, and Ivan Robotnik revealed that he was a hallucination of Charles, based on his hatred of Magitek. Julian was annoyed, and the others confused, but at least Vladimir had been vanquished... for the time being.

After that, the Questers had to destroy Meier Link. Or at least, try to. They went to where his body was--in Saturn Valley. After dealing with a relatively annoying set of puzzles (and using all three holy stones--the Emerald, Ruby, and Sapphire, to get in), they... freed a Solarian named Sha'fol who rambled on about how Kuja used the "Three Powers" to cause "so much death" and how he'd been trapped in there for years, haunted by Kuja's theme being played by an evil organ. And how Sardis Mongul was not a Solarian. Then, even though Sha'fol probably could have been a great help (his absurdly powerful magic literally annihilated the entire room he'd been trapped in once he was freed from the magic curse on him) he decided to sit there and let the Questers figure out Meier Link for themselves. Even though they were clearly under-matched: they bickered endlessly, Aetos made a fool of himself, Garrick threw away the element of surprise by just casually opening Meier's coffin, and then in the end they all basically had to fight Meier directly... but it wasn't doing quite as much damage as they would have hoped. Meier laughed the whole time, taunting them for casually awakening him and his legions of undead.

It was hopeless; Meier wouldn't die. He kept surviving and mocking the Questers. Then he went to summon his 'God', Dark Force, to end the Questers. All was lost... until The Void showed up over the Questers and blew up the caves and ruined Meier Link by exposing him to sunlight. Meier Link fought on, protected by a field from total death, but more abuse of Chaos Energy led to the 'Holy Deku Branch' Aribar had harvested earlier to stabbing Meier in the heart and killing him. The Questers then had to deal with Garrick, who had been driven insane by the red chaos emerald. They got him free of it, but then he decided to quit being a Quester and left (after an overly long argument) for some base to the north. Meanwhile, Aetos was a twit and banished to the X-Zone just so the other argument with Garrick could happen without him spying on it. While there, though, Aetos made a deal to conquer the realm for The Void. As if the Questers REALLY needed more rogue Questers. Metal Man himself complained a lot about being ignored, while Charles got annoyed when Metal Man compared Garrick to him. Julian was also annoyed, because Aetos wouldn't rematch him again. In the end, not much was accomplished other than The Void destroying Meier; that was it.

While waiting for a mission, Charles messed around with the emeralds. Sha'fol rambled about the past of Solaria and important swords and 'Valcion' and blah blah blah blah. The Questers eventually went on a mission to go deal with Lashiec, the last Commander. They ended up instead derailing into Twilight Town, where Aribar fought evil telemarketing Shoe Bandits (and nearly lost all his stuff) and Charles and Aetos investigated Creepy Steeple. There, Tridus showed up, and explained how he had been hiding. Aetos demanded the location of the emeralds, but Tridus had no clue--and wanted to kill Aetos, because he knew well what Aetos' corruption was--a curse of The Void. But Charles winked at him, noting he knew too, and he let them go on--to the actual location they needed to go--the ancient Fortress of Glass, the place where the ancient "Three Powers" gibberish that was being rambled about relevant to Sha'fol and Garrick had gone wrong in Season 4. Oh, and earlier in this session, Charles broke the Sword of Darkness that Meier Link had and made it into the Sword of Order instead.

The Questers finally went to the Fortress of Glass/"Kuja's Eye" and from it they found the program Gerald Robotnik had left to delete Kuja's control over the planet. They also found Lashiec, who was invincible. However, Charles fell down a pit and found a magical crystal that was powering Lashiec and broke it, destroying his power. Then as the fortress began to implode, he tried to hold them there, but Ganondorf appeared and rescued the Questers, explaining the crystal was the last seal on his prison inside the Dark World. He then sent the Questers back to HQ, vowing to aid in destroying Kuja's hold over the planet.

The Questers then formed up for a suicide mis---I mean normal mission, where they planned to go to Kuja's City and defeat him head on. They resurrected a bunch of old mecha--the MTAs from before--with the help of a returning Jeff Maxwell. They also picked up the fallen Quester, Phantom, and brought SkyHigh along as well. The group, now complete, proceeded to struggle against Maxamillian's two battleships, thousands of fighters, and his giant skyscraper sized mech. In the end, the Questers could not beat him--they destroyed everything, but then his mech came back for more, and it was far too much for them to deal with. Only a crazy shot from Kuja's own tower saved them--and even then, it was a mystery as to who did it.

Then Metal crashed the Dauntless into Kuja's Tower and the Questers invaded. Nova holograms tried to stop them but were defeated, then Kuja trapped the Questers in the dungeon at the bottom of the tower using his magic slide stairs. But in the dungeon was Gerald, who revealed he was a traitor to Kuja's side, then casually released a virus that began to destroy every city on the face of Nintendus. As thousands fought and died on the surface above, Gerald then encountered Zorn and Thorn in their uber tanks. He used a mecha to defeat them, but at the cost of his own life, letting the Questers go up on an elevator to fight Kuja. There they did... but Kuja had predicted they would be there. The chaos emeralds on them (brought by Metal) were used to power the tower... which was in all actuality a giant cannon meant to let Kuja take over/destroy entire dimensions. The Chaos Emeralds had just been the missing piece in the puzzle. But for some strange reason, Metal Man knew this also, and used the emeralds to go crazy-super, and then he and the Questers began psychotically attacking Kuja. Kuja was shocked by this, because as far as he knew, the Questers were afraid of the powers of chaos--not that they were full on chaotic psychos willing to risk total corruption to kill him.

The Questers fought Kuja, for a very long time. Kuja even went to Trance Mode; Garrick aided them while wearing armor that Metal Man said was a ripoff of him, and Aetos attempted to... defeat Kuja by saying his name backwards. He thought... Kuja was a succubus... WTF? Meanwhile, the people who were not stupid beat up Kuja and then eventually killed him, as repetitive Black Magic spells from Final Fantasy aren't enough to beat a bunch of ticked off Super Questers. However, when he was defeated.... all of Kuja's civilization simultaneously exploded, the tower began to fall apart... and an ominous voice spoke.

It was The Void! No, wait... it was Xalron. Sardis Mongul then appeared, warning the Questers that Xalron had created all the Nobodies. Then he died, due to nanomachines. Xalron then went to fight but was also destroyed rather quickly. He formed The Void, who then fought the Questers.... very strangely. Garrick repeatedly got knocked over and made to scream with +50 intelligence, meanwhile Metal Man was able to physically punch The Void despite The Void being made of nothingness. Jeff Maxwell, Sky High, Tridus, and Phantom all fought Aetos to prevent Aetos from using the Chaos Emeralds. But it turned out The Void already had the Chaos Emeralds and didn't need them. Tridus was on nobody's side, and fought Aetos only because The Void made him think Aetos thought he had bunny slippers on. Aribar got mad and zapped Aetos too. Julian got mad at all the strange people constantly showing up in the battle. Somewhere in the midst of this, The Void repeatedly used all the attacks all enemies used ever against the Questers, then Metal Man hit him with an exploding dryer. After a lot of fighting, the Sword of Order defeated The Void by itself, and then The Void died from all the attacks the others had done to it. But instead of normally dying, his soul was absorbed into Metal Man. As was Tridus', for whatever reason. The Questers then, having saved the world, reunited with VG and the Smashers, and got paid a lot. And thus, the world was saved...

Plot Analysis

This one is rather long in the tooth, as far as being logged. I took far longer on this than most, mostly due to my real life being chaotic. But I'm back, and this Season is no exception to the others for getting an analysis.

Starting off, my first thoughts. This season is the "Masterpiece" or so the teenagers that made it thought. It's a crayon drawing made by crazy teenagers; ergo it seems awesome if you're of that age, but as you get older it quickly seems to be just random insanity. That is how I will be analyzing this, anyway, since it was almost 10 years ago and the distance of years removes any shiny varnish that may have obscured its flaws at the time.

This season was... a combination of things. The first big chunk of it was just really normalized and heavily planned. Everything went down a straight ramp. The Commanders attacked, the Questers counter-attacked, ground was steadily gained. Everything was so cut and dried that I don't really need to analyze much there.

Then things started to get messed up. Klumsy's Platinum Challenge derailed the entire game as people spent countless sessions mindlessly fighting rehash bosses. Metal Man became some odd psycho who just started bashing the bosses and losing track of anything else. It was... just off. Not to mention the "Nobody Conspiracy" and the evil Metal Man showing up for no reason.

Then after that, the normal stuff continued. Or did it? No, it didn't. It slowly acted strangely and began to corrupt itself. Weird references to Solarians became a bit too prevalent, 'Sha'fol' came up too often, then it became some bizarre thing where Aetos acted stupid, Dark Metal Man trolled the Questers, and Garrick wandered off for no real reason. And then the ending came, and everything sharply fell apart into total pandemonium. Hilarious, but also terrible. It gave me visions of Season 3 and--no, I'm not linking Robotnik going 'Why' again, I'd need a new one if I were going to do that.

There's a reason behind this, as there always is. It isn't terribly pretty but it needed to be written down.

The plot was made by me and Nick. We originally had some bizarre magnum opus involving Kingdom Hearts and a Final Fantasy flavored ending. But over time we drifted over how to end it. It went back and forth. We made at least 3 endings. Then we came to blows over it and there was even a fight over who ran the game. In the end, Nick left and there was no ending. I had to make it up. Unlike a rational person, I just winged it, resulting in enough bizarre gibberish to create 3 books worth of epileptic tree plots.

First, I should have the person I speak of speak for themself, because a one-sided rant about him is just going to get nowhere. So for the first time, I'll quote in here something else--the description of the other ending.

[12:17:45] [Nick_Caligo] Alright. Remember how you wanted to figure out some way to bring all the crazy shit together into one unified, sensical storyline?
[12:17:52] [Metal_Man88] Yeah.
[12:18:10] [Nick_Caligo] I think I got it.
[12:18:46] [Metal_Man88] Well, I'm open to hear it.
[12:18:53] [Metal_Man88] Almost anything will do.
[12:19:08] [Nick_Caligo] They defeat the Void after Sardis's exodus fleet gets wiped out by some mysterious force. Aye?
[12:19:22] [Metal_Man88] Yes.
[12:19:40] [Metal_Man88] ->> Speaking of that, without the Knights of the Round, we'll need a new explanation for Sardis's fleet exploding <<-
[12:20:05] [Metal_Man88] ->> Hopefully one involving cool combat of some kind, or some unexpected help <<-
[12:20:40] [Nick_Caligo] Alright. After the Void gives his big dramatic, "you shall no longer be pawns" thing, plus some jibberish about how his time's almost up in this world, he digitizes and gets deleted.
[12:21:42] [Nick_Caligo] The chessboard follows, and then the entire room just goes up in little pixels, leaving the Questers standing in the middle of Eisnaught, puzzled.
[12:21:56] [Metal_Man88] Heh. I knew the Void would need to be deleted.
[12:22:12] [Metal_Man88] Having him sit around would invite him to make a mess again some day.
[12:23:03] [Nick_Caligo] That's when two or three people suddenly materialize and start looking around. One of them pulls up a holographic screen and keyboard and starts typing away doing diagnostics of some kind.
[12:24:45] [Nick_Caligo] They explain that they're technicians from the 4D world--much like the people from Knights of the Round would've been--and explain the true nature of the multiverse.
[12:25:05] [Nick_Caligo] That basically it's a big ol' computer database of all these worlds from video games dating back to the late 20th century blah blah blah et cetera.
[12:30:59] [Nick_Caligo] The Void was a virus that he loosed in the midst of the Nintendo folder to create basically a smokescreen effect to obscure himself from pursuit.
[12:31:53] [Nick_Caligo] The side effects of the virus included massive fragmentation to slow processor speed, and data compression to make things easier to transfer around.
[12:32:44] [Nick_Caligo] It then pulled in a number of bits of data from other folders.
[12:33:28] [Nick_Caligo] The result was that the otherwise vast and infinite Nintendus that Wolf and I were working with was contracted into the one you mapped out.
[12:33:47] [Metal_Man88] As well as some other things.
[12:33:58] [Metal_Man88] Questers warping in and out from nowhere...
[12:34:10] [Metal_Man88] A teleporter which allowed the Questers to go almost anywhere instantly, too.
[12:34:11] [Nick_Caligo] Yeah, like Sardis Mongul and all this Solaria junk that somehow became intregal to Nintendus's existance.
[12:34:24] [Nick_Caligo] The teleporter was there from the start. The Questers were unexpected.
[12:34:45] [Metal_Man88] Some day I'll have an RPG that has all of the Solarian stuff in perspective.
[12:34:51] [Metal_Man88] (Entirely original one, mind you)
[12:34:58] [Nick_Caligo] I figured you might.
[12:35:17] [Metal_Man88] I realized it was sort of a promising thing, however it belongs by itself.
[12:35:40] [Metal_Man88] Anyway, continue,.
[12:36:28] [Nick_Caligo] At any rate, they finally tracked down Luther to the Nintendus folder. That's when they found a massive amount of data getting ready to transfer, AKA Sardis's fleet. They quickly canceled the transfer and replaced the out-of-place data where it belonged.
[12:36:45] [Nick_Caligo] In other words, they didn't destroy the fleet, they put it back on a repaired Solaria.
[12:37:25] [Metal_Man88] Eh. That works just fine.
[12:37:42] [Metal_Man88] *Saves that climactic battle for the universe it belongs in*
[12:38:28] [Metal_Man88] Sardis Mongul himself had to be reformatted, so destroying him probably helped them.
[12:38:42] [Metal_Man88] Mainly because he, Maxamillian, and several others were corrupted.
[12:38:45] [Nick_Caligo] Sardis knew too much about how the universe worked.
[12:38:57] [Nick_Caligo] Oh, and the X-Zone, FYI, is the Recycle Bin.
[12:39:06] [Metal_Man88] Well, that makes perfect sense.
[12:39:23] [Metal_Man88] Almsot everything in there (Save for some weird things which continue to persist) is old stuff.
[12:39:49] [Metal_Man88] It then follows that they tried to delete The Void many times, until he decided to open up the recycle bin and cause chaos.
[12:40:41] [Metal_Man88] (Which will, for obvious reasons, once again be used as it should be--thus limiting it to rather, err, strange circumstances that important people such as Questers wind up in there)
[12:41:23] [Nick_Caligo] Aye. Deleting the Void just made the Recycle Bin its playground. It was able to use a BUNCH of junk that was just sitting around in there.
[12:42:07] [Metal_Man88] Another nasty side-effect: The Void could not be destroyed normally.
[12:42:21] [Nick_Caligo] So, they tried to disassemble its code manually, only to find that something else--the Questers--was already doing it rather well. The Questers weakened it sufficiently to the point that it was just a few quick command words away from being totally annihilated.
[12:43:55] [Metal_Man88] And this subsequently removes all of the strange and extra things from happening again?
[12:44:21] [Metal_Man88] That is, the stuff that is just floating around as garbage.
[12:44:30] [Nick_Caligo] Yep.
[12:44:35] [Nick_Caligo] Well, not yet.
[12:44:43] [Nick_Caligo] That's why the technicians have appeared in Eisnaught.
[12:45:20] [Nick_Caligo] They're there to survey the total damage the Nintendus folder has sustained.
[12:45:55] [Metal_Man88] I can see them being shocked at how much they find.
[12:46:33] [Metal_Man88] The Void was supposed to have died in Season 3; he lasted 3 more seasons than he was supposed to.
[12:46:42] [Metal_Man88] About 11 year's of madness.
[12:47:33] [Nick_Caligo] The one typing away is running diagnostics and checking to see what he needs to do to fix it. After a bit, he types in a few commands and, without a whole lot of warning, Nintendus is restored to normal in a fantastic light show of colors. All structures built on Nintendus during the "frag period" remain intact. Which means Eisnaught. Ivan Robotnik remains in command as a reward for helping them take care of the virus.
[12:48:46] [Nick_Caligo] When the light clears and their eyes adjust, they find themselves in a city that floats in the skies of Nintendus, overlooking its infinite vastness. Practically in orbit, actually.
[12:48:54] [Nick_Caligo] Geosynchronus orbit, even!
[12:49:25] [Nick_Caligo] The Stadium rests in this city, which shall be called Eisnaught Secundus.
[12:49:41] [Nick_Caligo] Eisnaught Prime remains on the surface of Nintendus.
[12:50:49] [Nick_Caligo] The technicians will then open up a warp portal and offer everybody the chance to either go home or stay here.
[12:51:18] [Metal_Man88] Aye.

The logs I have cut out before this one, and the ones after it are mostly bickering over what the ending is going to be, plus me going on about bizarre plots like something to do with a weird man with a weird blood-tear-like mark near his eye that wears all white and steals the Questers' ride home. Yeah... WTF? Long story short, there was a low level collision between Nick's plot and mine.

He wished to redo/reformat the world back to the one he used originally; I was more interested in keeping mine. We couldn't agree, he left, and the Luther plot was left to die. It never happened; none of it. Meanwhile, my crazy mayhem just sort of vomited forth onto the stage and made a mess of things, making it clear that the sort of result current-me would want never happened. That is, I would have probably rather liked a win-win ending in which the stupid nonsense died and yet the parts I liked about Nintendus stayed. But I guess the problem was, I'd never been allowed to fulfill the nonsense quota I needed before I realized the way I was doing Solarians back then sucked. (Ask me back then and I'd rant and rave about NANOMACHINES MCSARDIS was somehow the greatest character despite the fact he had 25.3 seconds onscreen total, and all of that time making weird riddles that made no sense.)

Nick had the idea of what was going on best: [13:07:59] [Nick_Caligo] See, you're weird. You've thought up more characters than I have in a long long time, but you can't for the life of you chain them together in a story. -_o

So basically, that was what happened. A bunch of disconnected characters trying to be characters without a plot, occurring after an attempt to rewrite the world as the ending got rejected.

So! To recap, the game was fairly smooth up until the ending, due to conflicting visions on what the next generation would be. The Platinum Challenge derailed the game as well, mostly because I demanded it even though there was really no way to do it without dragging everything down to slowtown. Took so long to get up to steam that the weird BS stuff I made up ultimately took over and triumphed, corrupting the game into gibberish.

So yeah. Best Season? Hardly. Best of SSQ 1? Eh.... it's close in ways. So far I've logged this one, 1, 2, and 3...

Season 1 vs. this Season: The Amish Cartoon season is more sane but ultimately completely unarmed, and loses that gunfight.
Season 2 vs. this Season: The opposite extreme, Season 2 brings so many different weapons to battle it trips and falls because it never stays the same long enough to really beat the way this season had some continuity for a good chunk of it.
Season 3 vs. this Season: It's hard to really say 'vs' because it seems more like Season 3 would regard this season as its little brother. After all, just like Season 3, it devolved into total insanity. Although Season 3 ultimately loses out because it never made sense at any point rather than losing its mind at the very end.

So, it's the least screwed up, compared to its immediate siblings. But it could even lose out to a late SSQ 1 Season I haven't logged yet. Its main Seasons to be compared to at the time were mostly a bunch of weird ones--the Dark Ages were still remembered them, and that was an entire year of total mayhem that was complete garbage. It's no surprise everyone thought this was the best--it probably was the best Season of its era.

But it can't really stand at all against the SSQ^2 or Confrontation Seasons, and probably at best breaks even with or barely beats the worst parts of SSQ:I. Even then, I doubt SSQ:I devolves into total mayhem at the end, nor does it probably stop dead to host mindless fighting for months on end!

I could go on for more, but I feel like I've said all this really needs. It has a lot more to comment on due to the increased fidelity vs. most of the other Seasons I've logged (sans SSQ^2--that one is just shorter commentary wise due to the fact it's much easier to understand the plot, thickness aside.) I may add even more to this whenever I get bored, but mostly because this is a fascinatingly strange Season that I don't think I can stop staring at easily. It is everything I had in mind for the future--awkwardly thrown on the screen with no art at all.

Word Map (Made by Wordle)




This map is rather useful, but that's solely because this season doesn't have TOO much clutter until the very end. We can see the most talked about Questers here: Aetos, Julian, Charles, Metal, Garrick, Digi, Nodal, and Azure. Those would appear to be the main Questers of this season, by default.

Then there's the villains; Kuja and The Void and a very hard to find 'Denon'. An honorable mention goes to Dark Metal Man, as the 'Metal' in there is combined between him and Metal Man, making it hard to tell exactly how much is each's doing. Especially since 'Dark' shows up as a lesser word in the background, suggesting it shows up enough.

After that are some more general descriptors. Emeralds and Magitek show up clearly, as well as light, dark, evil, good, fire, sword, force, energy, power, time, etc. These are a part of the huge focus on various 'abilities' this season. Also showing up is 'three', which has to do with the continual emphasis on three--the three holy stones of Hyrule, the Triforce, the Three Powers, etc.

Notably missing is most of the Commanders, Klumsy, and Sha'fol and Xalron and Sardis Mongul and Jeff Maxwell, and SkyHigh, and Tridus, and Phantom. It only goes to show that the Commanders were mostly pointless, nobody really cared and they were all steamrolled really fast except for Denon. There were also too many of them, since that split too much of their time up for anyone to remember any of them. A crucial flaw as far as those 'forgettable normal sessions' I was going on earlier.

Top 10% Logs of this Season

While this Season didn't SUCK like Season 3, it also is really large and bears the same treatment. Indeed, eventually I'll go back and do the same for all the Seasons. With that in mind, time for the top 10%... or should I say, top 3.

Number 3: Chapter 256: Requiem for a Denon

One of the few sessions involving a Commander where they aren't overly simplistically done. Denon is neither good nor evil entirely; a dark spirit enslaved by Kuja, he is one of the most powerful Commanders but also unwilling to do much other than try to avenge his enslavement by killing the Questers. And when that fails, he actually decides to change sides, and then sacrifice himself rather than risk more pain. It's an interesting character study, and alongside that, there's also the fact that he cleverly counters one of Julian's aggravatingly long lectures mid-battle with a well timed attack. He also actually challenges the Questers' minds as much as their power; something few others did in this season.

This is also here to help represent the Commander sessions, because, well, while others may be a bit better than it, if I left them ALL out, it would sort of be a statement that I hated all of them. The top 3 would be rather samey if I didn't do this, anyway.

Number 2: Chapter 276: Omnipotent Guest Week

It was once called 'Chaos Undone', but I see no chaos truly being undone. Instead, nanomachines, Gerald Robotnik, Ivan Robotnik, Jeff Maxwell, SkyHigh, Sardis Mongul, Xalron, The Void, Tridus, and Phantom basically appear in a surreal Atlantis-based mosh pit and beat eachother up while reality itself explodes. I criticized this chapter a ton, but as far as entertainment value, it is quite hilarious to watch it go completely out of control. One of those "so bad it's good" moments, at least for me. It sort of kills off all the overdone seriousness that this entire season had going on. Although I wish it actually made sense, some things can never be expected of gibberish, er I mean, insane psychotic crazy comedy.

Number 1: Chapter 266: Ruby Friday at Death Mountain

So, what happens when you mix some of chapter 276 with some of chapter 256, and remove the boring 'Commander' part? You get this. Robo-tektites, amusing but mercifully short cameos of things from Season 4, and Julian plunging into magma while a Ninja stands on his head and people waffle about. And then a block falls on Julian's head. Despite the extreme peril he seems to be in, it turns out to just be him screaming for no reason! And that's not counting the short appearance of the infamous "Soul Eating Gorons" that I really should have used more, as well as a bunch of weird traps that hit Aetos a lot. Also Dark Metal Man mocks the Questers' ignorance and/or stupidity before finally being driven off in a way that actually makes sense.

I just wish more of Season 6 had been like this chapter, that would have made it a lot easier to log, since it's far more amusing than most of the Season, and sort of a preview of things to come.

Cast (In order of Appearance)

Aribar - Quester - Weary Mage
Julian - Quester - Angry, Violent Loudmouth
Charles - Quester - Cryptic Mystic of Order
Aetos - Quester - Aggravating Idiot
Metal Man - Quester Leader - Borderline Psychotic Leader
Sardis Mongul - Fake? Solarian? - Diary Page Thrower
Digifanatic - Quester - Elementally Willful
Smash Dex - Quester Tool - Indispensible Equipment
Jina - Quester - Flake that Never shows up
Infantry - Denon's Forces - Wisecracking Mind Controlled Maniacs
Denon Reveille - Kuja Commander - Tragic Casualty of the Past

Azure - Quester - Misspelled Mystic
Mewtwo - Smasher - Turion Base Commander
Skyhigh - Fallen Quester - The Sky Never Stops Falling

Ganondorf - Smasher - Local Nintendus Dark World Ally
Magitek X-Nauts - Grodus' Forces - High-Powered Freakish Abominations
Grodus - Kuja Commander - Predicted Everything

Garrick - Quester - Nova? Nova... NOVAAA!!!!!!
Kuja - God of Nintendus - Complacent Dimensional Plotter
Maxamillian - Kuja Commander - World's Most Misspelled Name

Ivan Robotnik - Quester Ally - Anti-Magitek Master
Meier Link - Kuja Commander - The Undying Darkness Vampire

VG - Quester - Mostly MIA
E Li Three - Quester "Ally" - Master of Meaningless Tests
Nodal - Quester - Background Jokester

Klumsy - Dead Quester - Master of Battles
Bowser - Smasher - Mostly seen in holograms
Rapmaster Dracula - Hologram - Evil Memory of Mayhem
Dracula - Hologram - Partially Redundant Evil Memory of Mayhem
Evilking - Hologram - Evilest Nidoking Ever
Spyke - Quester - Short-Appearance SwordsReploid


Bowyer - Hologram - Eeeevil Controller Disabler
Wily - Hologram - EYEBROW MASTER
Sigma - Hologram - Impudent Fool
Blade - Quester - Only Speaks When Spoken To
Blastoise - Hologram - More History Anecdotes

Wolf - Hologram - Going to Get You
Pigma - Hologram - Still wants that Reward
Andrew - Hologram - Uncle Hologram!!!
Leon - Hologram - Out to Get You
Ridley - Hologram - Big Enemy
Dedede - Hologram - Yet more History
Zio - Hologram - Metal Man thinks he's become weak


Lakitu - Hologram - Long suffering Cameraman

Jessie - Hologram - Return of the Revenge of Team Rocket
James - Hologram - Make that NaN
Meowth - That's Left!
Big Bro - Hologram - Big Old Reference
Sephiroth - Hologram - Weak to Skyscrapers

Deloth - Quester - Back for More
Sardis Mongul's Journal - Annoying Plot Object - Completely irrelevant and confusing

Wolfman - X-Zone thing - Irrelevant

Thorn - Kuja Lieutenant - Mega Tank Pilot
Zorn - Lieutenant of Kuja - Pilot of Mega Tank
Dave - Quester Ally - Black Market Scuba Diver
Policeman - Kuja Minion - Keeps the Order with Violence
Shopkeep - Kuja Civillian - Triggers Alarms

Thirteen Gentleman Androids - Thirteen Gentleman Android - Vengeful Relic
Doopliss - Kuja "Commander" - Turncoat Turnsheet

The Void - Chaotic Monstrosity - Behind the Questers' Victory

X-naut - Grodus' Forces - Vile Vial thrower
X-Gunner - Grodus' Forces - Sharp Shooting Shootmeister

Mushroom King - Mystery Man - Quizmaster and Hiding King

Eldorado - X-zone Hallucination -
Robotnik - X-zone Hallucination -
SAX2 - X-zone Hallucination
Metal Sonic - X-zone Hallucination
Evil Aribar - X-zoe hallucination
SA-X2 - XZVone Hallicoan
Zess T - TV Personality - Cooking under Duress
Rip Cheato - TV Person - Guesses Everything
Kain - TV Show Person - Dark Ruler of The Square

Dark Metal Man AKA "Xalron" - Dark Alter Ego of Metal Man - King of the Last Laughs
The Ninja - Quester - Skull Stander-on-er
GW - Smasher - BEEP Beep beeep BOOP
Megaman - Smasher - Master of Jumping
Deku Tree - Quester Ally - Wooden Informer

Lord Crump - Grodus' Forces - Ally Locator
Dr. Robotnik - Leader of Robotnikland - Trolling You From The Future

Dark Goron - Meier Link's Forces - Soul Eater (If He Got a Chance)

Vampire - Meier Link's Forces - Finger Biter

Vladimir - Charles' Hallucination - #1 Reason Not To Drink Before Sessioning

Sha'Fol - Solarian - Calm Explainer of Doom

Dr. Mario - Smasher - In the Background

Tridus - Fallen Quester - Lunatic with a Huge Sword
Bandit - Lashiec's Forces - Corrupt Telemarketer

Gerald Robotnik - Kuja "Commander" - Destoryer of Civilization
Lashiec - Kuja Commander - Dire Dark Invincible Emperor

Jeff Maxwell - Fallen Quester - Nerdy Assister
Phantom - Fallen Quester - Mass Murderer
Battleship Pilot - Maxamillian's Forces - Defender of the Capital

Nova - Ancient AI - Garrick's Best Friend

Link - Smasher
Donkey Kong - Smasher
Professor Oak - Stadium Staff
Fox - Smasher
Zelda - Smasher
Falco - Smasher
Samus - Smasher

Conclusion

Well, hard to come to a distinct conclusion here. This whole thing was a bit of everything, and it didn't really offer a conclusive statement. It's a mixture of disappointment over how the ending was botched, relief that it brought an end to a lot of the formulaicness of the plot, but also regret that it didn't make any interesting statements while it was around. Mostly, it was a bridge to another era, without too much beyond that.

Perhaps in another 8 years I'll finish logging the core of SSQ: Confrontation and have something a bit more interesting to chew on...