Date: 6:22:12 PM, May 2nd; 6:11:11 PM, May 3rd, 2015.
Metal Man (GM): Recapitude. The Questers were planning to kill off Sloan. Of course, to do so, one must do more than just think that. Nonna went to Onta-Vis and made a very specific limited bit of noise suggesting Xavier had the Ultimate Weapon, and such, but we're starting a bit before she finished that--to Valron, after he got the data on the currency thing with Cronikos, on the Wing Fortress, before he left, where he'd most likely be preparing (in whatever way he does that) to go take the diamond walls out to sell for things on the Onta Vis Trade planet... Continuatio
Valron: "Right, let's see. Where to start...? Not sure how I should even hock these things off. Do have an idea on something I can use some of them on, but that's just one thing... And for that matter, how many do I even have to throw about?"
Metal Man (GM): You'd see that currently there's 7.5 diamond walls, the maximum that were carryable. They're pretty huge, the ship struggled dragging them back.
Valron: "Alright, seven and a half... Now let's see what places are actually willing to accept them, without, y'know. Making a certain someone wary about me trying to mount an attack on them..." (Provided there's some sort of directory he can search through or somethin'.)
Metal Man (GM): The directory can be seen, although thanks to Zeerusty materials it can be a bit annoying to view all of it on these weird anachronistic computers all over the Wing Fortress. Once you get past the "Rebooting Windows 89" screen though... You can see a bunch of raw resource traders will casually take it for prices that read as something like 10,000 or so "Cronikos", and the limit is caused muchly because of the availability of synthetic ones. However, the walls do have a certain aesthetic appeal, having already been carved, so it's noted you could get double or more if you found one of the building agencies to specifically need or want pre-made walls.
Valron: "Ah, 10,000 Cronikos normally, but..." *He narrows his search down a bit, looking for any particular building agencies that specialize in pre-made walls, preferably those who prefer something along the lines of the overly-opulent aesthetic the walls have going for them, given, well. They're made of diamond.*
Metal Man (GM: You would determine a specific shop named "Lord Trevel's Shop of Wealthe" seems to have a "Rare Element Collectione" complete with "Premiere Speciale Exoticke Materiealse" You can see some walls made out of titanium, gold, platinum, marble, tungsten, uranium, and even silk there. You see smaller objects made out of diamond, but for whatever reason no walls made out of it. Maybe they haven't thought of magical transparent diamond walls of doom yet.
Valron: "...Silk walls? I almost want to know how that works, but... Business first." *He decides to ring up Lord Trevel's, figuring that it wouldn't exactly hurt to see if they're in the business of dealing in walls made of diamond.*
Merchandiser: "Hello, and welcome to Lord Trevel's. How can we help you?"
Valron: "Ah! Hello. I was wondering. I was looking through your stock and I had noticed while you had various walls made of other materials, you only had smaller objects made out of diamond. I was wondering, why is that? Has the availability of synthetics made it a tad pointless, or is it still a smidge too expensive for most, even with that in mind?"
Merchandiser: "Most people don't seem to like see-through walls, although we occasionally make some on request. Something about privacy... also the sun going through it every time it sets and rises..."
Valron: "Ah, so it's more a matter of demand than anything else. Makes sense. Though I'd imagine it could at least make for something to add on top for something of an interesting layered wall type of deal, but...! More importantly, I asked because I have about seven and a half diamond walls to offload."
Merchandiser: "I pity you if you actually bought them. They rarely sell for as much as they do new, since most people charge extra much for the construction. But if you really are interested in selling... we typically do our business in Cronikos, but if you want to outright trade, we can do that too."
Valron: "Nah. Didn't buy them. Was more like... repossession, more than anything else. In any case, I rather am, though I'd be rather more interested in selling than out-and-out trade. Damned things take up an abhorrent amount of space."
Merchandiser: "Well, can I get an image of what they look like and their condition? Is there any specific style that they have?"
Valron: "A moment." *He takes a few seconds to get a decent image of the walls, before sending an image to the Merchandiser, making sure it's close enough for them to judge if the walls have any particular style to them.*
Merchandiser: "Hmmm, some sort of weird geometric castle style... looks like the walls have taken some damage too. Would this be some sort of fortress or something? I have clientele who might be interested, but I'll have to take a slight cut for the nicks and damage they apparently took... looks like some really nasty foe defeated whoever last owned those." *Winces.*
Valron: "Yeah, they were from a fortress. Belonged to a really nasty necromancer off in the boonies." *He coughs* "There's kiiiiind of a reason I said 'repossessed', after all. In any case, I see nothing wrong with a slight price cut. So long as I can make a healthy profit, after all."
Merchandiser: "Well, in Cronikos, I think I can give you 17,500 a wall. It's not impossible for us to make others, but the cost is rather high compared to the low cost of refurbishing ready made ones you happen to have conveniently 'acquired.'"
Valron: "Oh, that's completely understandable. And at that price... 131,250 Cronikos for the whole set? Sounds like an excellent deal to me. Means I can have some proper spending money."
Merchandiser: "Sounds good. Just drop it off at--" *Location data here* "And we'll provide you the Cronikos... ...do you prefer to take them in chip form or do you have a bank account?"
Valron: "Right. I'll be on my way." *He goes to punch in the co-ordinates and head over* "In chip form, please. Hope that isn't too much of a bother"
Merchandiser: "We'll be waiting, and, don't worry, we do it all the time here."
Valron: "Good to know. Thank you very much." *And with that, he closes the line and flies his ship over to the provided location. Though not before making sure the co-ordinates check out first. Don't want to fall victim to shady rubbish, after all.*
Metal Man (GM): It appears to be right behind the Lord Trevel store, in specific. By a bunch of warehouses, with a landing pad for commerce ships and such. The locally available equivalent to Google Maps would show plenty of ships coming and going there.
Valron: "Hmm... Yeah, that seems perfectly legitimate..." *And without any further hesitation, he goes to land his ship.*
Metal Man (GM): You land, without any issue. Some people gather outside, including a person with an electronic clipboard, who appears to be waiting for you to communicate or walk outside the ship in some fashion.
Valron: *He goes to open up the ship, peeking outside as he glances about at the various people, before looking at the person with the electronic clipboard* "Ah, I see you've brought some people along to transport the walls. Good to see that concern wasn't one in the first place."
Coordinator: "Hi. Yes, we tend to have to move a lot of materials fast. Just let us inspect and we should be able to take the walls off your hands, and get you your payment at the same time. We have to be efficient if we are to maintain maximum profit margin, anyway. Any inconvenience and... somebody else will get the sale instead."
Valron: "Of course, of course. Please, do be quick about it. The sooner I can have these offloaded, the sooner I can fly this thing with out having to accommodate for seven and a half walls."
Metal Man (GM): The workers, who noticeably have some degree of cybernetic alterations, eagerly walk in and carry off the walls, some inspection done as well. The Coordinator writes some notes.
Coordinator: "Yes, these are well within what we expected... you're lucky this is a Commerce Planet, with no taxes, these items would be expensive to sell otherwise. Here, sign here and we'll give you the chip and complete the transaction."
Metal Man (GM): He holds out a chip with a fancy glowing holographic verification projector + the value in Cronikos that is equal to 131,250.
Valron: "Yes, highly convenient, I'm sure." *He nods, taking the clipboard and wasting little time in signing his name on the projector.*
Metal Man (GM): You take and sign it and hand it back (since that's fine too) and they give you the chip with the money on it.
Coordinator: "The deal is complete, and in case you worry, there's a public registry of these deals. You can potentially get a refund on part of it if you wish within a day, should you have seller's remorse. Of course, as you might guess, it will cost some money to do that... otherwise, our business here is concluded." *He would nod and walk off, leaving you to go do whatever it is you want to do next.*
Metal Man (GM): The Wing Fortress can fill... hmmm... It can most likely fit about the equivalent of 200 fighter plane/TIE fighter esque ships. It is very large, but not a flying football Stadium style large. You'd find a number of drone-based transport units. It appears to the untrained eye that Robotnik could have been just stealing his designs from the things you see around here. The drone transports all depend on size. Everything from small football sized things to things meant for carrying entire houses can be seen.
Valron: "Hmm..." *He removes the smaller options from the list, before going to look at some of the house-sized carriers, mainly to compare prices.*
Metal Man (GM): It's about 10,000 Cronikos apiece, the fully automated sort, of course they are single purpose and have a range depending on where you use it. Space-only ones can go long ranges but will burn up on re-entry and can't fly; on the other hand, atmospheric only ones have no ability to move in outer space but get good distances (they can generally fly several thousand miles before needing recharging)--the most expensive, 15K Croniko ones, can fly all the way to space and back, and are rated by the fact they can fly from Earth to the Moon and back again. 25k for ones that would fly all the way to Mars (presumably more than enough for anything, as superships that go between planets like the Wing Fortress are needed generally if you want to move anything larger any further)
Valron: "Nah, I'm not gonna cheap out..." *He removes the 10ks from his list of prospects, before going to ring up Xavier. And keeping encryption on. Don't need eavesdroppers* "Hey. Was thinkin' of buying some drone-manned transports. Ya think we'd have much use for one that can carry entire houses and can fly from Earth to Mars? It'd be about 25k, but I've got a little over"
Dragoshi: "131k to blow. There's also some for 15k, but those can only really go as far as from Earth to the Moon."
Xavier Ridgecrest: *C* "Eh, I'd go for the 15k ones. I can fly the Wing Fortress over to anything else. Unless you plan to, like, loot Alsa or something. Then I guess, 25k."
Valron: *C* "...Well, I did plan on doing something like that eventually, considering there's probably quite a few ruins worth checking out, what with stuff like Vring technology lying about, but."
Xavier Ridgecrest: *C* "It's up to you, mostly. I don't trust myself with money." *Can be seen surrounded by golden goblets.*
Valron: *C* "Yeah, fair. Besides, I'd rather be prepared in case we get lucky and stumble across another place with a lot of things worth grabbing up. Means we can clear it out faster in last time, y'know? That, and less space taken up by stuff, even if that might not be an immediate concern for the Wing Fortress."
Xavier Ridgecrest: *C* "When I stole the Wing Fortress from Eggman, I had forgotten that it was basically a gigantic base. I've never been able to use the full complement of its hangar. If we ever did have that many on our side... well, we could have probably taken on the Eternal Dauntless in a direct conflict and won. Something to think about, because there's Time Cop ships that are like the Eternal Dauntless."
Valron: *C* "Hm. Probably something worth considering for future endeavors, then. Especially when we can make more Cronikos for return trips. Or trips to other Commerce Planets for that matter. Regardless, I'm just going to spend the 25k. I'm figuring it'll be one of those investments that'll pay off later." *And with that, he goes to order the 25k ship.*
Metal Man (GM): You order it. Naturally, it's a drone vehicle, so it will just follow you back. The people who make it are aware of privacy concerns and note "Once it begins following you off the planet, it shall default to your control with your passwords and no longer respond to ours" with some legalese noting that apparently shady companies used to make their auto-drones fly away and return after a set amount of time to try and resell them.
Valron: *He nods to himself as he reads the note.* "Good to see they nipped that in the bud. Imagined it'd be bad for more legitimate business if they didn't... In any case, I should figure out what to do with the rest of this. Well, aside from make sure there's some money to split between everyone, anyways."
Metal Man (GM): As you may remember, Xavier contemplated you could probably buy a good quantity of upgrade weapons for the Wing Fortress... but perhaps later, since the Wing Fortress equipment and the weapons you'd want would both probably not be legitimately available on a Trade Planet. And would probably tip off Time Cops if you bothered with it. Outside of that, you would remember what Violet said, so if you wanted to make it into something other than Cronikos, you'd need that specific person to change them into coins. Then again, they probably don't have enough Nintendus coins to even do that with, so you'd have to want a different bit of currency instead.
Valron: *Speaking of, he checks to see what other kinds of accepted currencies there are in case he gets thrown into a corner of the universe that doesn't accept Cronikos for some reason. Preferably a major currency of some sort.*
Metal Man (GM): You see the following: Cronikos - A Trade Planet Currency. They are backed by the Time Cops, and technically controlled by them, but rarely so--too much meddling and one of the other currencies would rapidly supersede them as the "Dollar Bill of the Universe." They are only spendable in areas backed by, allowed by, or otherwise tolerated by Time Cops. Despite this, illicit trade is well known. Though even then, nobody has broken their encryption, so it requires significant expense to make an 'unauthorized trade station' and you have a limited time before the change of codes renders your illicit station worthless. As such, they are generally the most usable, but... not always. Gold - In coins, or otherwise. No one generally accepts the authority of any other planet's gold coins as controlling their worth, but coins pop up so often they get priced on what metal they're made out of. A fallback for hermit regimes, unwanted places, or just plain backward places. Would be time traveling past earthlings would be wise to pack gold, because things like dollar bills are worthless out here, while the chunky gold coins remain fairly usable and if nothing else, hard to displace as the 'offline' currency of choice.
Metal Man (GM): Then for some of the more specific ones: Celian Currency (CC) - The Celians only use this currency, much to the distaste of everyone else. Their tedious requirements to use it mean it will literally disappear or self destruct if taken more than a few thousand miles outside of Celian Space. Its sole means is to control the trafficking of the Erastian-Solarian Anomaly Artifacts that tend to exist in their zone.
Metal Man (GM): Solarian Sols - Remnants of their ancient empire, these are heavily depreciated but still traded, mostly by people emptying old trust fund accounts or raiding destroyed ruins. Amazingly, these are still accepted everywhere, if only because of the killing most people make should they find a 'collector'--some countries also refuse to stop using these, and in those countries these are vastly more valuable than anything else. An extra side note, these are actually 15x more effective as a Magitek ingredient and the usage of coins as a magitek ingredient is actually considered only a thing hicks do.
Metal Man (GM): A footnote notes that with the Celian control of the only real Erastian ruins, Erastian currency only exists as a curiosity, and all the sharp edges and heavy things it's made out of making it too impractical to use anyway.
Metal Man (GM): Another amusement-only currency is... US Dollars - Some form of Earth apparently exists out here, and on it US dollars are still used. However, they are only used there. Some ancient trade war between this Earth and the rest of the universe led to shunning of its currency. Also, US doesn't even stand for United States, but rather Universal States. Weird.
Metal Man (GM): And as a final footnote, there is an active illegal trade in "Super Energy", which sounds suspiciously like Smash Energy or Alsan Energy or similar. It's highly contraband, so it's basically like illegal drugs, and therefore extremely profitable, but also extremely dangerous. Rates of exchange for most of the known colors and abilities top that of some industrialized nations, although it's noted 'Nobody actually pays that much for it, it's just including the amount of safety and expense needed to transport serious quantities of it' since Time Cops are apparently always going around and hunting down people who are unnaturally transporting this stuff.
Metal Man (GM): Hilariously enough, there's Phazon right near the top of the most expensive ones. I guess there was a reason Xavier kept it around in Tupperware tubs. Unfortunately given his tendency for eating it (something that is noted to supposed to be fatal) indicates you probably won't pry it out of his radioactive, cold, dead hands. Though that also gives plenty of reason for people to attack Phazon-afflicted planets, a tendency that 'has killed thousands of unwary adventurers and corrupted many more' The other currencies not listed here most likely may exist but nobody cares or trades them enough for it to be worthwhile, and exchange rates are liable to suck.
Valron: "Let's see... Celians are still obnoxious and dumb, Sols should be kept around more for magitek than actual trade, Dollars might be good to keep on hand in case we travel to this iteration of Earth for some reason, and... Gold. Phazon trade... Sounds like it could possibly be profitable, but more than likely could also be a terrible, terrible idea. Seems like the best choice would be to convert some of this to gold."
Metal Man (GM): Raw materials being the only other notable exception, as few people can ignore the raw value of raw materials that are in demand... Gold is basically bar form, the coins are considered fairly primitive and expensive exchange rate wise on Onta-Vis. You could most likely convert them back without that person Nonna noted, as long as you took it in bar form. Odds are based on what Nonna said, said person would want stupid rates for coins, 4 Cronikos to 1 coin making you rather poor in moments.
Valron: "In any case. Now that that's all nicely sorted out..." *He goes to check out a less... skeevy currency exchange-type... person. Seeing as nobody should know about him yet outside of his current transactions, he should hopefully be fine.*
Metal Man (GM): You find a fairly large bank with a bunch of tellers and automated machines. Exchange rates go across the screen, noting 1000 Cronikos = 1 bar. Your own knowledge indicating 1 bar is worth 500 coins, although there's usually some slight degree of value loss with trying to get somebody to turn it back into coins. Except on Nintendus, since obviously Ivan Robotnik's government is in Xavier's pocket and liable to take that rate straight up. One advantage of having Nintendus on your side. I shall eventually quantify the '4x/Civilization bonuses' you get from each place on your side, since part of this game will be getting friendly planets to help you more efficiently outfit stuff. With the starting things you have being Nintendus having a really efficient gold processing ability and Alsa being a giant treasure planet. Lots of raw materials, if making it a bit hard to figure out what to buy.
Valron: *He goes to open a secure line with the nearest non-gross teller* *C* "Ah, hello there. I was wondering if I could get 30,000 Cronikos converted into gold bars..."
Bank Teller: "Gold bars. Hmmm. Let me inspect the Cronikos you have."
Valron: *He nods, going to show the teller the chip. Or chips. However this works.*
Metal Man (GM): The chip, specifically.
Bank Teller: "Ah... issued on planet, no fees then. 30,000 Cronikos, 30 gold bars. Will that be all, or do you need anything else?"
Valron: "A small question before I take the bars, then. What kind of fees do I need to keep in mind in case I get a chip that's issued off-planet?"
Bank Teller: "10% Repatriation fee. Cronikos cross-planet are generally a little untrustworthy, so we have to take a portion of all transactions to subsidize dealing with the fraud in about 1-in-10 transactions between planets. It can get up to 20 or 30% if you have one of the infamous 'un-marked' Cronikos. We don't really like to deal in potentially illicitly traded ones. ...Also a 5% charge if you have Cronikos with somebody else's DNA-persona embedded on them. Thieves or even people who got them legitimately... one in twenty of those tend to require an investigation."
Valron: "Huh, interesting. I'll be sure to keep all of that in mind for future transactions, then. Thanks, in any case."
Bank Teller: "No problem. We try to be as useful as possible to new customers."
Valron: *He nods, before closing the line and... opening a secure line to Illian.* *C* "Hey. Was wondering if you had any particular advice as to what to spend the remaining Cronikos on. Have about 76k left. Had 106, but I converted 30 of those to gold bars just in case we end up somewhere where Cronikos aren't accepted. Figured it'd be smarter to ask you instead of Xavier."
Illian MacGregor: *C* "It's been so long... and usually when I was about, my ships would simply raid for whatever supplies they needed. Solarians became fairy tale villains, so... people were scared senseless of me when I was out there. Hmmm... If I had to place my finger on it, the main thing that would be of use would actually be... hmmm... Solarian power cells."
Valron: *C* "Figured it wouldn't hurt to ask in case you had any ideas. Was also pondering on seeing if I could secure a proper crystal to upgrade our Stargate with, but... I'm figuring that wouldn't really be something I'd easily find in this market."
Illian MacGregor: *C* "So, basically, Solarian Power cells, since that's what the crystal was. They are not a normal thing but antique devices still use them."
Valron: *C* "Ah, handy. A moment." *He opens up a search on the directory for Solarian Power Cells* "Any particular kind I should be looking for?"
Illian MacGregor: *C* "In the time before the Time Cops, Solarians ruled this universe, although fairly weakly. It was colonial in nature. Avoid anything fancy. Unless I'm physically there to cast my spells on them, they won't be readily counterfeit-checkable. Try for type C--the most common and least likely to be faked. I'd get about 15 of them."
Valron: *C* "Understood." *He then narrows his search down to Type-Cs.*
Metal Man (GM): You find a variety of stores. They range in price, from 350,000 at some insane store called "Clever Devin's", to more normal 7000 at "Ed's Supply", and then suspiciously low cost of 1000 at "Solarian Manufacturing Co."
Valron: *He gives a rather leery glance over at both the first and last stores, before glancing over at the much more normal cost from 'Ed's Supply'. He checks to see if that price is per Power Cell or not.*
Metal Man (GM): It is indeed. Its description explains: "Surplus cells, tested to still work within tolerable parameters, given the fall of their creators as well as the passage of years." It includes diagrams that invoke various Solarian runes and machines. Clearly, this place is some sort of surplus military store, by the fact that the cells are in a store surrounded by other old stuff.
Valron: *C* "Found a military surplus store called 'Ed's Supply' that's selling them. Won't be able to get all fifteen at the moment. so I'll probably put this one on the backburner for now. Will be keeping them in mind for later, though"
Illian MacGregor: *C* "Right. Though if you could get even a handful, it'd be pretty useful. Otherwise I might suggest a rendezvous on Alsa sometime. The destroyed ruins of my ships probably still have viable crystals. I have some plans we can discuss in person sometime."
Valron: *C* "Right. I'll shell out the money for five Type-Cs, then. A rendezvous on Alsa for more definitely sounds good, especially considering I just picked up a shiny new transport ship to help with scouring the place for treasures, anyways." *And with that, he goes to order five Power Cells from Ed's Supply.*
Illian MacGregor: *C* "Yes. We could salvage the ruins of the Bridge we used to stand on, together. It would allow me to spruce up my lab considerably. A second trip could revive the lab and place it on this ship. I hate the aesthetics of this ship, but that recent upgrade to higher level Erastian systems included their compatibility layers--the Erastians, as they slowly fell to the Solarians, became better at stealing and using their equipment... which means the upgraded Wing Fortress can just barely power some Solarian machines I'd like to have here. There's much more to it, obviously, but this line is probably far from safe enough for me to say them out loud. But, the historical facts as I noted are, well, not as dangerous."
Valron: *C* "I did make sure to use a secure line for this, but I'd imagine security does have its' limits. Regardless, it's probably for the best that we stop on that note. Also, I'm guessing the second trip is taking into consideration the incredibly nice transport ship I brought in? Regardless, I also wonder if we have the specialty stuff for your craft still lying about"
Dragoshi: "There, but... That's a matter to be discussed back on the safety of home base. ...Which I'll be returning to after I get the cells."
Illian MacGregor: *C* "Yes. In any case, that large capacity ship you got us shall have many uses, probably beyond what you might have expected. To be discussed later. Illian out." *Click.*
Valron: *And with that, Valron makes sure his order for the five Type-C Solarian Power Cells from 'Ed's Supply' has gone through, so he can pick them up or whatever it is he needs to do before heading back to base.*
Metal Man (GM): You make the order. You'd see a drone sort of thing fly over with the order, so as to save you the trouble. Huh, they're even in old Solarian boxes with ancient Solarian glyphs on them. The box would arrive wherever was closest to you/the ship, and the drone things would fly off. It has your name and everything on it, so nobody else will touch it.
Valron: "Oh, convenient. Certainly a lot nicer than having to walk from shop to shop, that's for sure." *And now, to return the Wing Fortress, richer with... generally a lot of stuff. Once he lands, he has a delivery of Power Cells to send Illian's way.*
Metal Man (GM): You would return and give them to Illian, who would casually look at the box quizzically.
Illian MacGregor: "What strange people, keeping the original box."
Valron: "Nice of them to do that, in any case."
Illian MacGregor: *Opns it* "It brings me back to when these were actually new, although to me, this is like you obtaining something from 30 years ago... nostalgic, but a little weird. Let's see." *He takes them out and tests them.* "One of them is a little weak, but nothing really wrong with them. About the failure rate I'd expect given how old these are."
Valron: "So, yeah. I'd say that was an eventful trip. Got a decent haul, too. Those cells, the transport ship, a few gold bars, and a chip that still has over 41,000 Cronikos on it. In any case, good to see they're still all in working order."
Illian MacGregor: "Now about what I was saying." *He would sit down at his workbench.* "I've been thinking this whole time, and this large influx of cash and machinery has given us the means to actually do things... ...To sort of pick up in an altered form from where we were before I lost my mind and things went to hell."
Valron: "Huh... I can definitely see the potential in that, yes."
Illian MacGregor: "Obviously, Xavier will go out in front and make the decisions, but as far as supporting those, we can definitely ensure this is a first class ship."
Valron: "Agreed. And the sooner we can improve its parameters, the better."
Illian MacGregor: "Erastian tech is a nice frame but a rather spartan interior. As a result, this workshop is fairly limited and that's why I tend to require a vast amount of inefficient gold coins to do anything."
Valron: "Which is why I asked if your ship's ruins might still have any Sols left on them."
Illian MacGregor: "And also why I haven't been doing much here, while seemingly every Solarian thing you bring in is miraculously repaired... Ah... you encountered my data on those, didn't you." *He would chuckle.* "Most definitely. I didn't tell anyone about them lest Kuja counterfeit them and make them meaningless, and after that I didn't want filthy Alsan fools doing it either. I had forgotten about them, since becoming Godlike meant money no longer meant anything to me, obviously."
Valron: "Yeah, stumbled across it while reading up on accepted currencies. S'why I converted some of the Cronikos to gold bars. Thinking in advance and whatnot."
Illian MacGregor: "Yes. We should wish to integrate the ship and exploit the ruins. The plan to kill the Time Cops is still being followed to an extent by Xavier. All we need to do is provide him a proper set of weapons to do it with. Mostly because he accidentally fixed some problems I considered unsolvable at the time... namely, making a non-stupid set of Questers, and also pacifying Alsa. Without those problems, it's much easier to play wrecking ball with the Time Cops. We just finish our resurrection of the only people to give them trouble, then watch them blow up. They only rose to prominence because of the Void incident in which Erastia and the Solarians were suddenly decapitated power-wise by an opportune Time Cop assault. I had been trying to avert this, but rejiggering things only meant instead of me, the defiant Professor Illian, they had... the completely stupid and unable to plan Xavier, who just fled like a coward, then warped back in time later and made a gigantic space-time anomaly that ripped apart that world in ways the Time Cops couldn't really comprehend either."
Valron: "It'll also make scrounging up the few bits and pieces needed to fix up the console back on Alsa once we're more capable of shredding Time Cop pests."
Illian MacGregor: "And so the Solarians were sucked into it too in this universe, and they fell. Time passed and here we are, post-Nintendus, post-Alsa, and wanting not to have Time Cops kill us the moment we leave neutral territory."
Valron: "Mind, we'll need to figure out a way to properly reconfigure Stupid and Evil into being, well... Neither of those."
Illian MacGregor: "Yes, we should probably repair the console on Alsa. I..." *he chuckles to himself.* "I think we can actually trust Kit to help ensure nothing stupid happens afterwards. I once thought of those Alsans as some sort of... insects... those disgusting furry ones even lower than anything else... ...their civilization outsmarted me, they hid, and one of their own used my own old superweapon to kill me. Consider my lesson learned."
Valron: "Yeah, I'd figure as such. She tends to handle things pretty well, even if her eccentricities have sprung up rather rapidly."
Illian MacGregor: "...Then again, even Borne's memory indicated that GUN also feared those fuzzy people. I should have listened. The infamous 'Sonic the Hedgehog' too."
Valron: "Yeah, best to actually get a good look at things before dismissing them as a non-factor."
Illian MacGregor: "They can't take over all of space, mind you, but if we give them control over Alsa, they should probably continue to revere it as much as their fancy temples."
Valron: "Saves you from more bumps that way."
Illian MacGregor: "That way Alsa remains pristine in case we need to go hide after something goes to hell."
Valron: "Sounds like a good plan."
Illian MacGregor: "No offense to Nintendus but it let KUJA go to it. Imagine if Kuja had tried to take over Alsa."
Valron: "Yeah, Nintendus can be nice, but it's... not exactly secure."
Metal Man (GM): *Illian makes a weird puppet show with photons.*
Kuja Puppet: "I AM DA GOD NOW, BOW TO ME."
Jack Puppet: "DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE."
Kuja Puppet: "OH NO DEATHGUISE AND I AM DEAD."
Valron: "At least with Alsa we'll have our own personal secu... pffff" *He's actually cracking up a little.*
Illian MacGregor: "Kuja was a giant pageantry show. And Alsa... Alsa killed people like him for lunch... by accident. If we hid there, well, we could watch as another Time Cop expedition force explodes on the shores of the GUN Continent."
Valron: "Which would also be easy pickings for us to recuperate with."
Illian MacGregor: "Though from what I've read, the Time Cops have decided Alsa is a 'Danger Zone' like several other completely dangerous areas to visit as a hostile invasion force. Ruins on Alsa suggest Solarians and others have repeatedly perished trying to invade it, much like Earth's Vietnam. So Nintendus will mostly be for its industrial output and financial industry. No one in their right mind would go hide in Toad Town. Even Ivan admits it's indefensible. The planet is too huge."
Valron: "Agreed."
Illian MacGregor: "Nobody can protect its constantly warping surface. ...Including anyone who takes it over."
Valron: "That probably counts as its' own defense... of sorts."
Illian MacGregor: "Yes. We can always revisit and free it from invaders. It is considered a planet of low utility to most outsiders, though. It has that barrier for now, too."
Valron: "Can't really properly take over something if it keeps changing every time you look."
Illian MacGregor: "Plus... I hate to say it, but we all know Nintendus is dictated by some weird multidimensional 'story' thing anyway... And that story has already run into the ground the 'invasion' thing."
Valron: "Indeed. Best not to get caught up in all of that again."
Illian MacGregor: "Yes, just thinking of it causes bad things in my mind."
Valron: "...Agreed."
Illian MacGregor: "And anyone who ignores it is liable to be killed by a giant sentient book. Since as we know, for whatever stupid reason, Nintendus' fate isn't a nifty little device you write into, but some... annoying... ...thing... ...anyway. That's the idea I have. We should eventually create or have a home base that includes a full civilization, too, that's out here rather than on Alsa. Alsa shifts too much for us to rely on it remaining friendly all the time."
Valron: "Well, we do have a couple options for that, right?"
Illian MacGregor: "Yes, as far as I recall."
Valron: "I know we have that Erastian base we've been still meaning to check out."
Illian MacGregor: "...Yes, if we can somehow de-haunt it. We need Luigi."
Valron: "That, and there's always that one spot where we found the parts for the Ha'kar... If you don't mind, you know. Being next to a black hole all the time."
Illian MacGregor: "We could use the black hole as a tactical weapon... ...just launch offending space ships into it. So it could be useful to stay here."
Valron: "Also, didn't part of dehaunting it involve literally turning devices on and off to remove the runes? That is a good point, in any case. ...And maybe later on we could have multiple bases and just build Stargate relays between then."
Illian MacGregor: "Of course, I'm biased, given how the Solarian base is here, and the haunted wasteland is Erastian. Stargates, hmmm? Yes... as much as I loathe borrowing technology from ancient superbeings, it would be the most convenient mechanism. I'd suggest the warp room but... As was demonstrated by Deloth on Alsa, Nintendus warping is REALLY DANGEROUS off of that planet."
Valron: "And it's not like we haven't made our own variant of one already. We just... need to be able to produce more of them."
Illian MacGregor: "So much so that it could be classified as a weapon by itself. Indeed, if the Time Cops become too much of a problem, we might want to weaponize Warp Room components and destroy them by ripping holes in reality. ...Er, but only as a last resort. Nobody wants to transform their home base into the X-Zone."
Valron: "I'd rather not have that happen, yes. Might actually be easier to start with the base near the black hole, anyways. Even if we may need to take some time to properly refurbish it and whatnot."
Illian MacGregor: "...Yes, plus we're already here, and we won't be destroyed... ...kind of ironic that the Solarian base is next to a black hole and the Erastian one next to a sun, when I think about it. Since the Erastians believed darkness was their ally, while the Solarians... you get the picture. As much as I can say each base is a fairly good explanation of each side. Erastians preferred cold steel and darkness to the light beach out here."
Valron: "Yeah, kinda amusing when you put it that way. Good thing the other base I was thinking of isn't anywhere near a sun, but... The one near the black hole seems like a more 'defensible' position, in any case."
Illian MacGregor: "The only danger is if anyone were to find the mechanism that detonated the artificial suns and used it here. After all, the First Solarian Empire didn't see it coming. Neither would we... I will probably reverse engineer and disarm it. The old Empire was... well... full of overly cocky people. They would hate me. My armor, after all, despite being paper thin, is still a 'filthy human invention.' As they sat around in their completely non-defensive robes, casting spells and hoping nobody would use chemical weapons or nukes on them. The only reason they spread so far was they could still manifest giant explosions better than anybody else."
Valron: "Yeah, see. At least have the decency to put up proper defensive fields if you aren't going to wear armor. Because being good at making explosions can only take you so far."
Illian MacGregor: "The second empire was the one that switched to being perhaps a bit too dirty. Hence the evil curses that befell that Erastian base."
Valron: "I see... At least we know we can just turn any afflicted devices off then turn them back on again. Seeing as that's how that apparently works."
Illian MacGregor: "Yes. Generally the curses were meant to delay rather than destroy. If all the enemy machines were destroyed, then valuable enemy intelligence might be lost. All the same, to the somewhat stupid Erastians, they might as well have been death curses."
Valron: "Aahh. I see. Makes a good bit of sense, then..."
Metal Man (GM): Aand... running out of fuel, so we shall finish here, I think... Pause.
Metal Man (GM): Recap. Nonna set up the trap for Sloan by letting rumors about Xavier out into the Onta-vis public. Valron purchased a lot of things as well. Now Xavier and the Questers are on the Wing Fortress as Xavier tries to recall the plans properly before he does his part. Continuation
Xavier Ridgecrest: "So if I get this straight... I think I'm supposed to claim I have this superweapon and lure Sloan out into the open... then we... somehow destroy him. Hmm..." *He takes out his dex and plays pixellated footage back on it.*
Valron: "That seems to be about the gist of it, yes..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Trying to recall what we do once we catch this son-of-a-gun, mind you. He has a powerful force field. Need to shut it down... hmmm... that's right. The plan... We use the Charles field against him too. However, we can't be doing it on Onta-vis, I doubt their Time Cop enforcement would... oh, right. But Sloan wouldn't likely do anything there either, knowing the Time Cops were watching... Still not 100% sure about this, but I guess... neither would Sloan be sure of his role either."
Metal Man (GM): Illian would walk in and casually pat Xavier's shoulder.
Valron: "While I do have something that can quickly eat through his field, I doubt it'd be able to so quickly enough..."
Illian MacGregor: "If you bring him here, I'm quite certain we can screw him over."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "What makes you so certain about that?"
Metal Man (GM): Illian looks left and right, and then takes out an old box that says 'METALZ STADIUM STUFFZ'
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Huh?"
Metal Man (GM): He dumps out a bunch of items--a bunch of old weapons and equipment from a dog's age ago.
Illian MacGregor: "Solarian magitek items from the Kuja era. You smash one thing with the other. He has a force field, if for some reason your force field can't crush it... one of these should be able to."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yeah, but it's not like we have power for--"
Metal Man (GM): Illian idly takes out a lightsaber model and plugs in a Solarian power cell.
Valron: "But that's where you're mistake- Exactly. Got a few power cells while I was on my little trip."
Illian MacGregor: "It's by no means a cakewalk, but if he is a wiseguy, we'll just be wiser guys."
Metal Man (GM): Borne and his Deathguard sit nearby.
Valron: "I should probably keep Ed's Supply in mind for any future transactions in case we need to buy more ancient military stuff."
Commander Borne: "The Deathguard were intended to kill more than just Questers, you know. When those toys run out of juice, me and my friend here should be able to finish him off."
Illian MacGregor: "Ah... I once believed in people... they all flew away without me."
Commander Borne: "This one didn't."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I get the picture, you're all tough badasses of doom or something. But realistically speaking we still have to keep Sloan from escaping. He's not going to just sit here when SOMETHING breaks his force field."
Illian MacGregor: "Correct. ...We need to launch him into the black hole. I doubt even he is going to come back from that."
Commander Borne: "Alsa's too far away, otherwise I'd suggest using Alsa's antimagic to disintegrate him."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I wish the Sword of Light worked out here, that would work better..."
Commander Borne: "Does your ability still work, Valron?"
Valron: "I have been trying to restore it, but it hasn't exactly come back to me yet..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Ah... right... what am I thinking? Gelato can do it. He can break ANYTHING. Right... I guess the plan is I go with Gelato and bring him back here, rather than draw attention to Valron or Nonna... Since I'm pretty certain if he sees Valron with me he'll be reminded of the doom from last time and not come, and we already discussed how Nonna being with me would make him suspicious that a fix was in..."
Valron: "Again, that was the idea, partly because it'd be a bit with her or myself, myself in particular due to the... history I share with Sloan."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. I guess I'll be back soon enough, come with me Gelato, we have to go trick a trickster trickily. Trick-trick. Trickadidly Picadilly Circus."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier would walk over to his limo, feeling a tad strange that this mission was mostly for him to do alone, as much as he could probably have Kit with him, due to how things were in Confrontation.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "You know, Gelato. Things have sort of gone full circle. It used to be that I was a bad man for not embracing a group of people. Now It's good for me to go out on my own sorta sometimes... weird..."
KitRedgrave: "...Tricks? Where?" *He seemingly only now exists in spacetime.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Oh, hi Kit. We were about to fool Sloan into thinking I had the ultimate superweapon of all time. Then lead him back here, to which we can get revenge on him for harming Alsa. And disarm him before he harms anyone else."
KitRedgrave: "Oh, this oughta be good. Can I help?" :3
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes, because I need to do a lot of tricky lie things to make it appear that I actually do have a superweapon. Nonna has helped by creating an atmosphere about it, but... you know how it is, fancy images are even better than just normal things. Plus you have The Book and come from a group of people who hid themselves in a side dimension... so, er, I figured you could probably do some sneaky things to help fool Sloan even more. Since the plan goes like this... 1. Trick Sloan into following me with illusions, 2. Destroy Sloan here with Gelato and other things breaking his tech."
KitRedgrave: "Right, they'll buy it more if we can show them it."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yeah. Sloan doesn't expect Questers to be sneaky. Heck... I don't expect it either."
Nonna: *C* "Don't forget that the key is to fool him into thinking you're alone, Xavier. He doesn't take you seriously, but he would take us seriously. That's why we're relying on the othala rune to warp in suddenly and surround him when you give the signal."
Xavier Ridgecrest: *C* "Right, so basically I put Gelato in my pocket and you, Kit, can walk at a distance... no offense to the Othala rune, but I don't want to get in trouble if something happens with that sort of thing. If something goes wrong Kit can help ensure it goes un-wrong... if things go twice as wrong Gelato can just break things. Consider me paranoid but appearances is the game... just like the Othala rune, I don't actually have to be alone, just appear that way."
KitRedgrave: "Right... in the worst case we can just jump out from nowhere and beat him with sticks."
Xavier Ridgecrest: *C* "Plus Kit can be in my car and invisible so that if things go wrong... Kit can blow things up. Nice diversion, you know. On that note, Kit, let's get in the car." *Realizes he doesn't need to talk to Kit with comms* "...Oops. The good news, Kit, is you're so short people probably can't see you from outside the window... ...why did I make my car so weird for short beings when people like Gibby rode in it all the time???" *He opens the door and sits in it, staring out of the cavernous interior.* "So... Gelato can be inside my arm storage area and use my sensors to see what I see, while Kit hangs out in my car and I probably need a giant pile of cinderblocks so Kit's feet can reach the accelerator... ...this is reminding me of old missions already..."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier casually walks out of the car and puts some old Nintendus phonebooks in it, then waits for Kit to get inside.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I guess Kit can use the dex controls, but like James Bond, it's actually kind of hard to RC control a car."
Nonna: *C* "I'll be ready to act whenever you need me."
Xavier Ridgecrest: *C* "I'll keep my channel open, due to my helmet and all I always have a comms ready. And I made sure to note down Digifanatic's highly illegal 'burrow through dimensional walls' algorithm he used to send messages to Earth with just in case somebody gets cute with barriers and such."
Nonna: *C* "Just in case, unless you specifically transmit a "*do not engage*"command, I'll assume it's still on, even if you don't tell me to come. Just in case he thinks to disrupt communications."
KitRedgrave will apparently be driving the... evil limo of doom... Oh joy.
Xavier Ridgecrest: *C* "Right, all the rest of you on the Wing Fortress should consider the same, since he might be able to jam even that. I'd probably only get one or two messages... So... I just realized I should probably have Kit drive me there, because that way Kit will get practice... ...and space is empty out here, just in case we hit anything."
KitRedgrave just sighs and gets in. Let's hope 1-Ups still work out here, because if not... Kit also never really learned how to drive, but that seems to not be a problem with THIS CAR.
Valron: *C* "Understood. Should I cube up the Vendetta Machinegun for this, what with his barrier and all that?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: *Stacks up the phonebooks* "I've turned off the gnarly things inside it. Basically, the left phonebook, which has Grunty Emporium logo on it, the one with the witch on it, is the gas, and the right phonebook, which has E Li Three's bomb shop on it, is the brakes. Most definitely. And... and the steering wheel illogically lets you move the car up or down by tilting it up or down, and left and right involve turning it. And... don't worry about the paint because I designed the vehicle to never rust or flake the paint."
Valron: *C* "On it." *And with that, he pulls out the cube, prepares the Vendetta Machinegun. He then looks for a good place to hide so he isn't just out in the open for when SURPRISE TIME is afoot.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I once lost it in the Revolutionary war... the British never did figure out how the jimmy open the doors. They were so mad. Maybe I'm responsible for later designs in vehicle technology... ...nah, then no vehicles would work."
KitRedgrave: "I'm still not so sure driving this around is a good idea, considering it's hard for me to even see outside of it."
Metal Man (GM): He sits back in the passenger seat so Kit can start the car. The keys have a weird blue puffball with a smiley face on it.
KitRedgrave: "Considering the fact that I'm actually a good bit shorter than who this was designed for..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Nothing in this vehicle is ever a good idea, so you're on track! I made sure to have a force field turned on in case you veer off to the left towards other people's expensive vehicles."
KitRedgrave: "So... tell me which direction to steer in? I mean, I don't even know where we're GOING."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well... turn left and push on the gas to start going towards the exit to this hangar."
KitRedgrave: "O... kay..."
Metal Man (GM): He points to a lane inside the Wing Fortress hangar. The hangar doors open up so you can drive out the fairly spacious hangar.
KitRedgrave would turn the key... ...and have the starter grind a bit, not really getting the concept of how car ignitions work. "Well... here goes nothing."
Metal Man (GM): To add to it, the car would make some really weird noises. Xavier would casually reach over and hold down two buttons you never saw hidden under the dash. It would start, but also keep grinding, until it finally turned on.
KitRedgrave: "...How do you ever go anywhere with this thing."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "The double kill switch... ...almost forgot to turn those off. I'll leave the car idling with you in it to avoid that problem later. Well, it involves a lot of cursing... and hitting buttons..."
KitRedgrave: "Maybe we should get you a control system that actually works later. But for now, let's go on with this fools errand of driving..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Nobody except for you seems to have figured out how to ride on top of the vehicle... Aribar still wakes up in cold sweats about that time we drove off an underwater waterfall... Then again, you can fly and he... couldn't..."
KitRedgrave pushes the gas and turns over to the left... into the wrong lane... into the wall.
Metal Man (GM): *BONK* It bounces off a force field. Had that not been there, you woulda crashed into Borne's ship.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Ah... little too far to the left. I make that mistake all the time."
Metal Man (GM): You see all sorts of skid marks on the ground.
KitRedgrave: "...But you can SEE..."
Metal Man (GM): It appears Mr. Magoo got his driving skills from Xavier.
KitRedgrave: "Hold on. Let me fix this."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Funny thing about that, my hands aren't very dextrous. Imagine always wearing gloves... now imagine gloves that can't even feel anything."
KitRedgrave would float up and kinda adjust the mirrors to make it a little more obvious where it's going.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "And your hands don't even... directly answer your brain... They lag, and... ...I don't think I need to go on. It's really stressful."
KitRedgrave: "...Okay, this is stupid. Hold on."
Metal Man (GM): You can barely see now, just enough.
KitRedgrave would go and magically shapeshift into someone who can see over the wheel and looks nothing much like Kit.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Ah... you know, that fixes both problems at once."
KitRedgrave: "Right. Now let's... go."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "That's why I brought you along, actually. I need at least one normal person to cover my six when I'm busy making bad decisions."
Gelato: 'w' *He's sittin'.*
KitRedgrave continues to have problems steering the car around, because even though she can SEE the car doesn't want to go where she wants it to go.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Gelato is okay but he can't pretend to fit in." *Pets Gelato* "I should see if Gelato can transform into some sort of weapon. That would break my record for strange weapons."
KitRedgrave: "...Probably."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...And be pretty dangerous. Since he could break anything I swung him into, potentially."
KitRedgrave WHACK! CRASH! KABOOM! SCREECH!-es the car out of the hangar and out into the... spaceroad. Yeah.
Metal Man (GM): You scratch the walls on the wall out, but otherwise get out fine. The car seems to respond a bit weirdly. Left moves further than right. The up and down randomly change in thrust value. The car spins about but for some reason the internal gravity means you only see the window view change. There's next to no feedback... and you're a being with hands that can actually feel stuff.
KitRedgrave: "Whoaaaa..." *He keeps trying to course-correct in vain.*
Metal Man (GM): You manage to simulate the weird way Xavier drives almost perfectly.
KitRedgrave: "Now which direction are we going? And quickly, before we're going some other direction"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Let's see... outside of everywhere all over the road... over here..."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier presses a button and a weird OSD pops up on the windshield that tells you to go "52 degrees UPPER LEFT."
KitRedgrave: "Oh... nice."
Metal Man (GM): It adjusts as you move, to show when you're going roughly in the right direction.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I instantly forget all directions. Without my technology I think I'd just be perpetually lost. Like I was on Nintendus, without my technology, 50 years ago."
KitRedgrave chaotically mashes the accelerator, steering in all kinds of directions to go that way. Roll for motion sickness resist! j/k.
Editor's Note: Some day I'll have to have Kitsune Driving Simulator for that, XD
Metal Man (GM): You continue going, getting a little dizzy, though after a while your speed ends up cruising speed, at which point it gets rather sensible due to the propulsion canceling out everything else. The planet slowly starts to appear on the horizon.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "One other thing, we're not landing in the normal place. My limo and me are wanted in 193 billion jurisdictions."
KitRedgrave: "It wouldn't surprise me if that were the exact number."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I'm a fall guy for a bunch of petty crimes the Time Cops did. They decided after the first couple big ones that I would just serve as a scapegoat."
KitRedgrave: "...A thought. What if Sloan knows we're coming? This car isn't exactly incognito."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Exactly. Push the button by the cigarette lighter." *Gestures to a weird Smiley face Button on the dashboard.*
KitRedgrave pushes it, with some hesitation.
Metal Man (GM): You hear a noise, and notice that the outside of the car appears to have disappeared.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I stole a Time Cop cloaking device a while ago, then jimmied it with some random components stolen off of some other things."
KitRedgrave: "I see. Then we're just gonna ambush him outta nowhere... if it holds long enough."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "The vehicle occupies a spectrum that I've been told can occasionally cause mental instability if you stay in it too long. Luckily I never use it that long... and idiots only think about cruise ships, not tiny limos."
KitRedgrave: "But you're in it a lot."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...I'll have to research some other spectrum sometime, yes."
Metal Man (GM): He stares out the window, looking at nothing that you can even see.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I'll get the better of you, space bumblebee!"
KitRedgrave more aggressively speeds off, giggling a little.
Metal Man (GM): You fly towards the planet. There's an official lane to land on it and everything.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Okay, so... careen the vehicle off the space lane and towards that really spotty looking area on the left. You don't have to do it 100% perfectly, mind you."
KitRedgrave: "Roger!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I made the vehicle's auto-pilot aggressively ensure it could land... no matter what... after I saw that other vehicle embarass Garrick."
KitRedgrave jerks the steering wheel hard to the right far off the official lane and careening directly into the planet.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "No vehicle of mine gets to do that to me or anyone else inside it! As much as sometimes it would accidentally perceive clouds as solid and land on them... ...Or on the ocean... ...Or just above a flock of migrating birds..."
KitRedgrave: "So... don't get out before looking. Got it."
Metal Man (GM): The vehicle shows a bunch of weird OSD things that indicate it's detecting a landing spot and everything.
KitRedgrave would drive aggressively off a buncha clouds it was just about to land on.
Metal Man (GM): It's like a weird Photoshop Edge Detect algorithm. It keeps trying to figure out which thing is the ground. Eventually though, a spot just outside Onta-vis. You find a place there to land.
KitRedgrave would drive towards it, and... somehow lock up the steering column. "...Uh. Crap."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Ah... I didn't know that was possible."
Metal Man (GM): The vehicle continues to go towards the ground.
KitRedgrave: "Better hope we have extra lives."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Lemme see." *He reaches over and jams a screwdriver into it.* "I think it just doesn't like you sometimes, that's all. It's used to me."
Metal Man (GM): The ground continues to get even closer.
KitRedgrave: "Do I need to pull up or anything, or does it do it?" *Possible CRUNCH?*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "It does it, but it won't be very fun to land if we don't correct it. ...Yes... that's it."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier casually puts Gelato on the steering column.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Gelato. Break the steering column free."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier seems calm... probably too calm... ...then again, the entire inside of the car appears to have been haphazardly rewired and even some places have little goo dragon bite-marks in it.
Gelato: *D* *He jumps up and down on it!*
Metal Man (GM): The car makes weird noises and you hear a loud CRUNCH... and it stops just dead of the ground, causing everybody to feel 'thrown towards the ground' for a moment, as it slowly lands.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Okay... we managed not to die..." *He carves a weird tally mark into a part of the peeling foam headliner.*
KitRedgrave accidentally hits the horn with her face. x_x
Metal Man (GM): It has tally marks that have so far added up to 13. The horn plays a weird little theme instead of a normal horn. It sounds like somebody combined Marseille with Disco Inferno.
Gelato: *He bounces proudly back to Xavier.*
KitRedgrave: "...well, cover's blown."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Isn't that the plan? They have to think it's me."
KitRedgrave: "True."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "On the other hand, you should hang out in here and watch me... I guess I probably can't hide Gelato all that well... ... you two can watch me from the car, I'll leave it idling. Because I generally do that whenever I'm going in fast and dangerous anyway. It's well known that I can't start my car very fast. Especially that time with the lava... Never again! So... just watch me while I walk about and warn me if there's anything suspicious... ...oh right, Kit, can you cast a spell to make me look... I don't know... glowing or something? I need to attract even more attention. Without causing a riot. Or maybe also Gelato could... hmmm... can you change shape too, Gelato?"
Metal Man (GM): Some people outside are busy staring, wondering where that horn noise on acid even came from.
KitRedgrave makes Xavier look positively radioactive and not at all healthy to even look at. :D
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Hm... some day we should research how to let you do that, Gelato. Just imagine all the bad guys you could chew on while transforming into thematic weaponry power rangers style! ...I've been in the car too long already."
KitRedgrave then also turns Gelato into... a totally trippy, psychedelic top hat or something.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Oh... right... just because he can't transform doesn't mean you can't make him look like something else."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier puts Gelato on his head and smirks bizarrely.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I guess I'll tear up the town then... ...I hope the police there aren't looking too closely, although they know I like to spend money here, so I doubt that'll be a problem."
KitRedgrave: "Truly the look of someone too bizarre to live, yet too rare to die."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier waves to Kit, then gets outside the car, glowing weirdly and wearing the tophat. Gelato can survey the area while sitting on Xavier's helmet. Xavier shuts the door, acting as if nobody is inside his invisible car. Kit can now watch Xavier, including an "Xaviercam" visible on the dash OSD. Xavier starts out by jollily (jolly-ish? Jollistically? Jovially...) jovially walking towards the crowd as if this is normal. People stare at the glowing man in Erastian armor with the top hat much like the Circus has entered the town. Some horrified, others more amused than horrified. A random peace officer scans him and shrugs.
Officer: "He's... weird... but it's not going to kill anyone."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Hmph! You know me! I only possess objects of great power! I don't use them on civilians!"
Officer: "I'd say you're under arrest, but you don't appear to officially even be here... ...Just don't stay around too long without buying anything."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Of course! What do you think I am here for... I could never dream of taking on this entire planet... without a reason!"
Metal Man (GM): You notice Xavier handing the Officer a gold bar out of view of a camera.
Officer: "Er... be safe... ...dangerous... whatever it is you're going to do."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Totally." *He walks by, as you can see the officer radioing in something the car radio scanner picks up.*
KitRedgrave just keeps watch over Xavier, facepalming at the officer's total ineptitude.
Officer: *R* "Be on the lookout. Suspicious entity wandering the streets. Do not engage without clearance from head office. Loss of life would be too large. Suggest High Level Crimes unit review the file first."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier stays in sight, casually looking around. Nonna wouldn't have to try too hard to figure out what's going on. The news would report some reporters observing Xavier from a distance.
KitRedgrave: "...I give him about ten minutes before the entire planet's police force is on him."