REVOLUTION - Story - Chapter 17: Sloan's Sadsack Planet

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Date: 5:38:25 PM, August 13th, 2017.
Metal Man (GM): Recap
The Questers dealt with the mysteries of the Sword of Light. Namely:
We continue, with the Questers still on the odd planet, having left the Temple of Light that they finished picking through. Most of the Questers have even gotten back to the ship.
However, Louisoix, Valron, Xavier, and Demon are off of the ship. Xavier is busy staring at the Sword of Light.
Continuation
Xavier Ridgecrest: "So, are you sure this is all that is on this planet? It seems rather wasteful to me if you ask me..."
Sword of Light: "You have no clue. The Questers have been around so long. You're lucky anything still exists."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, we have existed a long time, but I don't get why that's such a concern."
Sword of Light: "The original deal which created your organization has long become expired. By all means, you shouldn't even have powers anymore."
King Demon: "So what will happen to this planet now, then?"
Valron: "The fact those parts for the that world creation device were even still around is rather fortunate, to say the least."
Sword of Light: "This planet will slowly decay until there is no structure on it, then most likely fall apart into nothing. As it is, it wasn't meant to last very long, and only held together because there hasn't yet come anything to destroy it."
Valron: "Probably for the best that we came here before someone could, well. Actually do that."
King Demon: "... Nah, not going there."
Sword of Light: "I still don't understand though. Why do you Questers continue on? Through the meddling of Xavier, the SuperPowers are destroyed. The Stadium being protected is an obsolete concept.
You could go home and live perfectly normal lives."
Valron: "Yeah, bit of a problem, there."
King Demon: *Shrugs* "In my case, I have nothing better to do. Besides, a part of me still longs for the old days when the Questers were not much more than a security force."
Valron: "I don't really... y'know, have a place to call home."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well I have liberated Erastia, but Time Cops still lurk out there. And the remaining one who runs things wants my world dead."
King Demon: "Then again, I suppose in some ways, we still ARE a security force. The place we protect is just the entire multiverse, rather than a single stadium."
Sword of Light: "...You would do this for fun, or for lack of anything else to do. Hm. My Creator underestimated... I cannot tell a lie, and if you didn't notice already, you were never supposed to be anything more than pawns in a scheme.
But now you've escaped the scheme and are plotting to kill the person who created it."
King Demon: "Yeah, we've always been good at screwing up other peoples' schemes."
Sword of Light: "I have to warn you. This is where it will begin to become much more dangerous. Those people you destroyed earlier... there was an aspect where it was meant to be.
But now, my creator most likely will want you, and anyone who supports you, dead... and without his magic on your side, it will be more difficult to--"
Metal Man (GM): Xavier idly smacks the Sword of Light.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Was it somebody's magic that helped me when I was completely out of my mind? Was it somebody's magic that saved me when my psychotic alter-ego tried to kill me?
No."
Sword of Light: "...My warning applies, but I have to concede that the other reason I haven't spoken too much... is that obviously, you are no longer operating in the original mission parameters. So I cannot help you beyond what I have said. Information is lacking."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "We'll take it from here, then. I'm going to have the Wing Fortress scan the whole planet. Nova, what do you see?"
Nova: *R* "Planet is barren, sterile. You de-powered the last source of power when you dealt with that temple. ...There is an aberration on the other side of the planet, though it only began after you turned off the transmitter."
King Demon: "What knowledge DO you hold that you haven't told us? Aberration?" *Looks to Xavier* "Guess we should check it out?"
Sword of Light: "The name of my creator, which as I said..."
Metal Man (GM): It pauses.
Sword of Light: "My creator's energy is on the other side of the planet. You should get off of this planet."
Valron: "...Oh. ...Yeah, let's just leave."
Sword of Light: "He's figured out we're talking about him."
Nova: *R* "The energy is moving towards your location."
Valron: "Now.."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I hate running. But I know nothing about this. So I guess we must."
Metal Man (GM): The entire planet begins to violently shake, cracks forming in the ground, with every step that can be heard.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...On the other hand, I don't yet have a counter for planet-destroying stomps of doom, so... ...yeah."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier hurries onto the Wing Fortress.
A distant voice can be heard.
???: "YOU WERE NOT SUPPOSED TO SEE THIS."
Valron: *Also promptly heads into the Wing Fortress because fuuuuuck that!*
???: "YOU WILL SUFFER."
Metal Man (GM): The Temple of Light is superheated to the point that it glows, and melts into molten slag.
???: "FORGET WHAT YOU HAVE SEEN AND I MAY LEAVE YOU BE. OR I MAY NOT. THE DIE HAS ALREADY BEEN CAST.."
King Demon: *Yep, he's gone to Fortress.*
Metal Man (GM): The group leaves on the Fortress. Xavier looks at the controls.
He pauses a moment.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Are you absolutely certain we can't take this guy?"
King Demon: "Why?"
Metal Man (GM): The entire Temple of Light flies into the Valhalla shield all of a sudden, blasting the Wing Fortress off the planet.
Valron: "I'm pretty sure the answer is 'yes, we really can't'."
Metal Man (GM): Everyone is thrown around for a few moments by the sheer g-forces.
Once the Wing Fortress is thrown far enough away...
The entire planet casually detonates.
Xavier gets up and stares.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I... I still can't believe it. I'm quite certain we--"
Valron: *Slowly gets up, taking a second to shake himself off* "Well. That was ludicrous."
Metal Man (GM): Illian casually shoves Xavier away and begins flying the ship away.
Illian MacGregor: "No. We cannot take that thing. It was what cornered me at Solaria."
Valron: "...Ah."
Illian MacGregor: "Only Psycho Illian could have killed it. And even then...
You'd have Psycho Illian in its place."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "But the Sword of Light--"
Illian MacGregor: "Bah! It's a trap, it's probably trying to lure you into making it powerful so its creator can use it."
King Demon: *Picking himself up off the ground* "Well, that was a fun ride..."
Valron: "And you're implying we couldn't turn the trap against them anyways, because..."
Illian MacGregor: "...Well I don't honestly know, but that's what I was thinking when I used the Solarian Machine against that thing. As you can tell, it followed me into this realm and even set up that whole Wolfman thing without even blinking."
Valron: "...Regardless. Let's not tempt fate any further than we already have today."
Nova: "The entity has dissipated after erasing all traces of that planet. Sensors don't even show remnants of the explosion anymore. We are, for all intents and purposes, the only ones who know what happened there now.
Temporal distortions indicate it removed any RF waves or light that might have been seen from afar retroactively."
Valron: "...Well, that's absolutely horrifying."
Nova: "Though we still have what we took from there. Presumably it has given us a choice rather than deleted them. What choice that is I don't know. The problem is, when I glanced upon it, it used its knowledge from having made Nintendus, and thus, me, to simply make me unable to see what it was.
I fear anything else Nintendus based would be susceptible to that, or worse."
Valron: "...Let's not touch Nintendus for the moment, then."
Nova: "It was attempting to control me but things Garrick and Kuja did to me ended up making me incompatible with what it was doing."
Valron: "I have a feeling if it's doing that, then..."
Nova: "...As well as Psycho Illian's modifications, which it apparently specifically failed to understand."
Illian MacGregor: "Yes. The entire reason I went Psycho was to become too much for it to handle. I'm sure I looked like some idiotic buffoon back then, but maybe you can see why now.
What's a little madness to... ending something that specifically was hunting me and anyone else like me to serve its own ends."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I still think we can kill it. But it's gone now, so I'll have to belay my plans to try to do just that."
Illian MacGregor: *Sighs* "Yes, yes, you were my earlier plan to kill that thing, Xavier. I prevented you from ever doing that, though, so that you wouldn't be killed."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Oh, so on top of everything else?"
Valron: "Let's just... put all that on the backburner for now. Play dumb."
King Demon: "Odds are we'll have to deal with whatever that was eventually."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier grits his teeth.
Valron: "And I'd rather do it later, rather than sooner."
King Demon: "But for now, let's take care of other business."
Valron: "Agreed."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier sighs a bit.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "So close... I feel like we're getting so close to whatever might have destroyed Erastia... it felt the same to me... I want to kill it more than anything... but alright."
Illian MacGregor: "It's hard to say. Fringe could have done it, or that thing could have, or something else. That part of the timeline got fractured by all the weird things that happened."
King Demon: "Patience, Xavier. We'll deal with it when the time comes."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I guess I have to listen to you, Demon, because if even you are telling me that, then I must be pretty bad about it... alright." *He puts the Sword of Light away, while mumbling about 'Stupid sword'*
Illian MacGregor: "Since Xavier is probably too... angry to think straight, I'll just repeat the same things I saw you talking about as for what to do next."
Valron: "Seriously, if the fact that we're unanimously agreed on this being a bad idea. Then, uh. That should say enough, really."
Illian MacGregor: "There was the Intel blackout at Chark to investigate. Probably that Thanatos guy throwing a temper tantrum. Probably also related to Autumnus locking everyone off intel-wise to try and set up something over there."
King Demon: "Oh joy, dragon hunting again?"
Illian MacGregor: "Maybe. Might be Time Cops too. The other thing was what I suggested. If we're going to kill people, it should be Alt Nonna."
Valron: "How are we even going to get over there anyways? If I recall correctly, that's squarely in Time Cop space, and, well. I'd imagine they'd be a bit cross if they found us there."
Illian MacGregor: "Yes, you'd probably have to go incognito. Might be difficult to do.
There's that Corellian freight ship you have laying around that is fairly unimpressive that might be sneaky enough."
King Demon: "Incognito is NOT traditionally one of our strong suits."
Louisoix: "Nor mine."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, I have a mask that lets me turn into anyone. I wonder if that old Quester will ever want his face back."
King Demon: "Oh, hey, Xavier. You have that Quester's face? I want that!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I can potentially lend you it, but, I am somewhat attached to this creepy copy of their face that was carved off by an evil mask salesman and then hacked by an evil russian computer genius on an island cursed by nightmares."
Valron: "So, wait. Are we actually gonna try and see what's up with Chark, or...?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, I have a means, I'm uncertain if you guys are up for the camouflage..."
Illian MacGregor: "For what it's worth, an accidental precedence was established by what happened on Onta'vis. The Time Cops still have a mild presence there in spite of our treaty. They just are no longer allowed to go around doing anything other than self-defense actions there.
The de facto understanding is we can still visit eachother's planets... but it's gray area stuff."
Valron: "Makes sense."
Illian MacGregor: "We'd need a better defined diplomatic mission to assure Autumnus we aren't doing what we're actually doing. Since our obvious goal is to cripple his intel blackout and intel operation there so that he can't use that to stage further intelligence-based strikes on our infrastructure.
Though, again, if you can't do stealth, there remains my idea to hunt and kill the 'Outliers', Dark Nonna and the others around them.
Granted. It's a heavier lift than sneaking around and kidnapping some agents or blowing up some tech."
Valron: "I can sneak around easily enough. Add to it, even if we don't feel like doing a bit of stealth work, I do have other ideas as well."
King Demon: "Hmmm, do we try not to pick a fight with the Time Cops or go hunting for a fight with Nonna's other self?"
Louisoix: "If needed, I can always cook up some sort of support. I was able to get into that stadium and do things, anyway, though I was new at the time, so who knows how that'll go now."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "And, I'll mention it though you wanted to do it later. We could always try to find what happened to Dr. Light. ...Granted, based upon how that planet violently exploded, I get a bad idea about it."
Valron: "Add to it, I do remember Marley also having something he wanted us to help with. I'd need to check up with him about that, but. That's also out there. Yeah, I don't want to go down that particular route just yet, Xavier."
Metal Man (GM): Marley walks in.
Marley: "What... what was that explosion outside?"
King Demon: "Well, where would we even go to START searching for Dr. Light?"
Marley: "It felt like the sort of evil magic Dyne used..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, Dr. Light would be..."
King Demon: "Oh, it was just some being blowing up a planet."
Louisoix: "Dig through some back channels, maybe start on Nintendus, move from there."
Marley: "I'd curse but exploding planets are too normal to me now. Instead..."
*Pours a shot* "To exploding planets and the fact I'm probably endangered by it!" *Downs it.*
Valron: "...Right."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes, Dr. Light would probably have left records on Nintendus."
King Demon: "Weren't you supposed to be cutting down on the... no, wait, that was Borne, nevermind."
Marley: "Oh, right. Nova told me Valron mentioned my idea to investigate the Mad Men monolith. No, it was me. But a planet exploding is a rare occasion.
It was just the one.
Unless you're going to blow up more planets. Then I'll stop."
King Demon: "Eh, I didn't blow up THAT one... not that it didn't cross my mind for a second or two..."
Marley: "I just wanted to say, the exploding planet thing felt strangely familiar to me. Like... that silver being that was mentioned long ago in the texts of Alsa."
Illian MacGregor: "I thought that was me."
Marley: "Me too, but... ...the being in the texts was said to have been so powerful as to create death itself. And we all know you never could do THAT!"
Illian MacGregor: "Eh... it's probably all stories."
King Demon: "Great, ANOTHER trip to Alsa?"
Marley: "Well, it was about whether the Mad Man pillar was linked to those ancient Vhallan thingies you encountered on Anthon's planet. Not really a huge important thing. Archaeology, you know.
Doesn't blow up planets. At least not anymore."
Valron: "I wasn't thinking about the monolith, actually. It was more something else you mentioned back on Onta'vis. Something about a mess on Sloan's planet? Though the monolith could also definitely be worth checking out..."
Marley: "When he died, the planet went into anarchy. I have heard very unpleasant things about the results."
King Demon: *Shrugs* "We have a lot of options. Some of them will be easier than others, obviously."
Marley: "Ostensibly the planet was in Time Cop territory but even Time Cops seem to just not care."
Valron: "I see... could be worth checking out. Maybe we could play it to our advantage if we take it off their hands, seeing as they see it as someone else's problem."
King Demon: "Sure, we can at least take a look."
Louisoix: "Could still cause some grief. People don't like their stuff stolen even if they think its garbage. But we can do that. I imagine we could take some time to look at other sources for Dr. Light and, if they don't turn up, head to Nintendus."
Metal Man (GM): Marley shows it up on the map. It's a distance from Alsa and Rendar, forming a sort of equilateral triangle if you were to check it out.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "As you can guess, I want to find whatever we can to try and get Dr. Light and/or his secrets on the upgrade. If the sword is upgraded, it can probably kill its Creator as well as any Time Cops that might get in our way. But it would probably make us one of the biggest targets in the process..."
Louisoix: "Indeed. But we should act quickly regardless. Who knows when someone will notice that's our goal."
King Demon: "Nintendus first, see where that leads? Maybe it'll lead somewhere closer to Alsa or Sloan's world, make it easier to choose one of them as our next destination."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Still, I've been waiting a long time to find out what killed my people--and to get a chance to kill that thing."
Valron: "I think it may be best to wait a bit longer."
Louisoix: "For?"
Valron: "Immediately following up on that lead might not be the best idea, given the rather... violent reaction to us even having checked out the coordinates on the sword."
Illian MacGregor: "I am skeptical anyone can ever beat that thing, to be honest."
Marley: "Well... I can't say anything is unbeatable, but what you described happening did certainly put a chill in my heart."
Louisoix: "Surprised you'd have some restraint. I guess you guys need to pull punches to keep me surprised, considering my time with you so far."
Valron: "Besides... It may be best to act as if we're not going to follow up on that lead for now, anyways. So... if it's fine by you lot, I'd rather check out Sloan's planet and see where to start on that."
Louisoix: "If someone knows we know about it, then they'd probably nuke us now, and our delay would be an obvious ploy since its that useful. Or they'd think we're idiots."
King Demon: "Not pulling punches as much as realizing that punching right now is a fruitless endeavor and thus a waste of time."
Louisoix: "I'm fine with that. Minor research into Dr. Light will help until we get back to it anyway."
King Demon: "Indeed. And it may give us leads to our other issues as well."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I... ...will suggest we go to Sloan's planet first. Ironically, because it could be used towards the Sword of Light research... ...Without being obvious.
Sloan stole many things from Nintendus."
Louisoix: "Works, then."
Valron: "Sounds good to me."
King Demon: "Sure, Sloan's world works too." *Sighs* "Let's just hope we don't run into the Time Cops this time."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Sloan was also researching a means to basically rewrite reality. That's not what we want, obviously, but..."
King Demon: "We don't? Oh, sorry, I mean, of course we don't..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...It was mostly meant to 'remove all the "plot holes"' and make him God."
Louisoix: "With that, maybe Pizza with Pineapples can be made good."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "The wreckage found after Psycho Illian blew up his station indicated that was his main goal. Until Psycho Illian upstaged him. But...
Components of that could be used to either bring Dr. Light back, find him, or even made into more parts for a new Anti-Reality Gun that could be used against that thing we encountered."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier glances to Illian.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "You never did try an Anti-Reality weapon on that thing, did you?"
Illian MacGregor: "It... it has to be considered too dangerous. What if it can copy the effect? What if it survives?
Sure... there's a chance that the Anti-Reality Gun is so incredibly destructive it can annihilate that thing..."
Valron: "Then we don't use only that."
King Demon: "Anti-reality gun... that sounds like fun!"
Illian MacGregor: "...True... if we combined it with several other weapons of incredible destruction, it would increase the chances of success..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yeah, the Anti-Reality Gun was so deadly, it was one of the few things Psycho Illian couldn't ignore."
Illian MacGregor: "It also nearly destroyed reality itself several times, you know! Energy cascades coming off of it... if they got out of hand, it'd be like when a nuclear explosion happens, only all of reality is the fuel!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Obviously this would be MK 2."
Illian MacGregor: *Facepalms.*
Nova: "Plotting for the planet Sloanis #1. That is its official name, by the way."
Louisoix: "Is there a #2?"
King Demon: "Sloanis #1? That's it, when I get my own planet I'm naming it Demon's Place."
Nova: "Rumors suggest there might be."
Louisoix: "...rumors?"
King Demon: "And we're gonna HAVE to find #2, then."
Nova: "Its official flag is a circle festooned in sequins of green and purple arrayed in ripples on a disc that spins at high speeds and the main flag fabric is made out of a weird recycled plastic of red and purple that makes incredibly loud noises as it flaps in the wind."
Valron: "Any idea what the second planet could've been for?"
Nova: "Sloan planned to make any planet he conquered the next planet in the sequence, and so on."
King Demon: "... What?"
Nova: "If his forces have conquered any other planet, however small, it would be Sloanis #2. And so forth.
His government devolved into anarchy and mass murder has occurred from roving gangs fighting over remaining territory. As a result, we don't have any official records as to any other Sloan planets."
Valron: "Oh, that's... that's great."
Nova: "We have multiple places we can land. The capital is currently in a state of continual battle between multiple biker-gang like associations. There's a single military base where the last known presence of Sloan's actual military exists. They still hold official state power.
...They have sworn to fight to the death and consider us one of their most hated enemies.
It's also where, rumors state, Sloan's remaining incomplete military technology lies.
Finally, there is a base on the planet where his Goa'uld remnants exist, as well as, apparently, some disenfranchised Deathguards from when Garrick forced Borne to kill all the Deathguards and some fled.
They are neutral towards us."
King Demon: "Oh, lovely, so we're going into a planet where the only place that isn't complete anarchy wants to destroy us on sight!"
Nova: "With Sloan dead, they don't necessarily follow him. Yes. Mostly. The neutral people are likely to watch us very tightly.
Then there's wilderness."
Louisoix: "Guess that's where that stealth comes into play."
Nova: "Lots of forests and mountains on this planet."
King Demon: "Well, let's find a place where we can land without being shot at that's fairly close to where we need to go."
Nova: "Where should we land? There is no significant space fleet. Presumably it was picked off by Anthon's ships."
Valron: "...Hrm. Maybe we could start with the disenfranchised Deathguards? I mean, Borne should still have one of those kicking around on this ship somewhere that could help open up more... relatively friendly communications with them, maybe? I'm not sure"
Nova: "News indicates that Anthon's first reaction after we killed Sloan was to destroy all of their intergalactic ships."
King Demon: "Well, let's go see them first, then."
Nova: "I'll have Jones, AKA Borne's Deathguard, come with you."
Metal Man (GM): 'Jones' walks in, wearing a uniform and looking... fairly chill.
Valron: "Sounds like a plan to me."
Jones: "We are going to... ...the location where those who fled the purge went? Hmmmmm..."
King Demon: "Apparently."
Valron: "Yeah, I figured it'd be a good idea to start off there."
Metal Man (GM): The ship eventually flies over the base, where a damaged Pyramid ship sits. A comms hails occurs.
Valron: "Since they, along with the Goa'uld remnants that are there are just neutral towards us, I figured it'd be best to start off with a place that's not likely to greet us with... whatever weaponry is used here. Exploding popcorn kernels? I dunno. Anyways..."
Deathguard: *R* "Halt. Who wishes to visit the Refuge of Guards?"
King Demon: "... Not sure I'll ever be able to see one of those and not get the urge to do some exploding."
Jones: "They have staves and also powerful laser cannons, should they tire of us. I suggest we speak tactfully to them."
King Demon: "Tactfully? You mean I can't ask which dead God they abandoned?"
Louisoix: "No, nor can you offer them pineapple pizza."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "You want to talk to them or should I, Valron?"
King Demon: "I don't have one of those... yet."
Valron: "You first. I want to gauge their reaction. That and I'm not sure how the Goa'uld will feel, given how their old boss wasn't particularly fond of me..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: *R* "This is Xavier Ridgecrest, of the Questers. We have come here to discuss the chaos on this planet currently."
Deathguard: *R* "Hm. Clarify one thing for us before we decide. Are you still the one who had Garrick as your Quester?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: *R* "No. If I saw him again... if WE saw him again... we would kill him."
*R* "Probably brutally."
*He gestures with his golf club.*
Deathguard: *R* "Next question--"
Xavier Ridgecrest: *R* "I thought there was only the one!"
Deathguard: *R* "You hate the one who tried to genocide us all, yes. That doesn't mean you are safe to let in."
*R* "Say you have your desired result. With our help, you completely save this planet from its anarchy. Then what do you do. Are we independent? Or are we a new vassal state? Will you ask us to take up arms and kill a new or old threat? Speak honestly now, for if we find you to be incorrect later, we will never trust you again, no matter what the circumstance."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Wow, tough crowd. Wonder what I should say to that."
Louisoix: "I imagine we'd leave them alone? Unless you guys have other plans."
Valron: "Hrm. Honestly? While I'd appreciate any help we can get in dealing with various threats to the universe at large, I'd understand if they'd rather just be left alone in peace."
Xavier Ridgecrest: *R* "We would generally leave you in peace. It would be up to you whether to help us."
Deathguard: *R* "There is still some of that politician's sneer in your voice, but, given we have heard of your work on Onta'vis and how you let a filthy businessman rule the planet despite previously attempting to kill him... I can believe most of your words."
*R* "Land outside our place. And come in without your weapons."
*R* "Or turn around and leave, if you cannot do that."
*R* "You may not be Garrick. But we know that there are many things here you might want. We cannot let ourselves become entangled and possibly killed because of it."
King Demon: "Smarter than most."
Valron: "Sounds reasonable to me."
Louisoix: "Probably sick of being burnt and is just cutting to the chase."
King Demon: "True, but even most openly hostile people we meet with don't request we leave our weapons behind."
Jones: "They were made by Borne to destroy Questers. So they know a thing or two about you."
Valron: "Makes sense."
Xavier Ridgecrest: *R* "Well, we can deal with that, so okay. We'll be there."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier goes to land, and casually drops his weapons in a giant pile.
Jones: "Also... Historically speaking, the Questers they were meant to kill refused to ever drop their weapons.
Ever.
They entered Capital City and immediately were about to start bloodshed with the local cops over it.
Even though, to be honest, they could have defeated any real threat in that city with their bare hands.
So I'm guessing they want to rule out that you're the Alsan Questers."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Hahahah. Hahahaha. ..." *Flexes his hands which are made of metal and can probably crush a skull.* "Yes... yes! I am completely harmless without my weapons!"
Valron: "Can't say I blame them."
Louisoix: *Also gets rid of his weapon* "No big deal for me."
Valron: "In any case..." *He takes a moment to head back to his room to drop off, well... the rather considerable supply of weapons he has. He then returns once he's offloaded them* "There we go."
King Demon shrugs and puts his sword down... and a mechanical hand?!?!?!?
Metal Man (GM): The weapons are placed, and...
The door opens to go outside.
King Demon: "Well, let's go meet the natives."
Metal Man (GM): It's a nice pine-tree forest out there.
Louisoix: *Heads out, of course* "Hm. Nice scenery. Better than a deserted planet with a Denny's."
Valron: *And out he goes.*
King Demon: *He walks out and looks around as well* "Definitely more to look at than the last place we were... Well, before the fireworks."
Metal Man (GM): The huge pyramid ship has two men blocking the entrance. They wear GUN-like uniforms, but now with a simple U on the uniform.
Deathguard 1: "Let's see then. Have you put your weapons down..." *Scans* "...It appears you have."
Jones: "These are not the Alsan Questers."
Deathguard 1: "We need proof, not words. Proof is there. You may enter. But know this: if you do anything wrong, you will be expelled."
Deathguard 2: "...We would kill you but we know that you would come back to life and make our lives hell. While we have thought of researching a means to counter your revival, you haven't posed us a problem any time recent. ...Don't make us change our minds."
Valron: "Noted." *He gives a nod to both of the Deathguards.*
King Demon: "Ah, we aren't here for a fight."
Deathguard 1: "We remember you, Demon. You worked with them. And especially the DEMON CHILD. ...So it is up to you to prove that.
We won't presuppose you will do anything... but we won't be your buddy either."
Metal Man (GM): The door opens up.
Jones: "Some people around here probably would rather you're six feet under, Demon, so, walk a bit carefully. They still remember... what was her name? Kitchen?"
Valron: "Close enough."
King Demon: *Shrugs* "So this is like almost every other planet I go to."
Jones: "...Yes."
Valron: *He doesn't really seem to care enough to correct Jones.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I'm lucky. Planets either don't know who I am or try to kill me without warning."
*He walks in.*
Valron: *In any case, Valron walks in, now that the way has been open.*
Metal Man (GM): Inside, another Deathguard walks in the way and stares at Xavier.
Deathguard 3: "You're... the person Garrick killed."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes."
King Demon: "You were saying?"
Deathguard 3: "...It is good that people Garrick killed are somehow defying death. If you see him... give him this bullet."
Metal Man (GM): The Deathguard gives Xavier a wicked looking bullet.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "What is this?"
Deathguard 3: "In our time here, we researched Garrick's genetic code to create a retrovirus that would cause him to live an entire year of excruciating agony, slowly dying one part of him at a time, before dying a thousand deaths and finally ceasing to exist. ...You seem to be someone he'd try to kill again... and you have guns."
King Demon: "Ooooooooooooooooooh, can I get one of those? I got a few people I'd like to use that on!"
Deathguard 3: "Who are these... 'few people'?"
Valron: "I mean, if we find some more Garrick-likes to chew through..."
Deathguard 3: "The bullet only works on our specific targets... and only Garrick so far, because of the fact he is an artificially altered being."
Valron: "Not that I'd want any more of that. Eesh."
King Demon: "Eh, nobody you've met. At least I don't think you've met them."
Deathguard 3: "As much as we want to kill the Alsan Questers, for example... You, Demon, aren't some fake entity we can just create an antidote to.
Demons require magic, and we don't have that."
King Demon: "That's good... I probably would have been eradicated long ago if that was the case. And that would pretty much suck."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I have to admit. I'm not certain I'd want even Garrick to die that horribly. But the threat of it would probably be enough to make him turn around and run away. So I'll keep it. ...SO then... about the planet's state of affairs?"
Deathguard 3: "The weak kill the weaker. The strong stay safe in this fortress. What is there to care about?"
King Demon: "Actually... that sounds like something my dad would make..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "We... kind of like to not have innocent people being killed."
Deathguard 3: "This is an abomination planet made up by Sloan's machinations. Most of those who came here were in on his plans. We only stayed here because we, personally, had nowhere else to go.
And no, we are not going with you. You may be people Garrick would try to kill, but that doesn't make us your friends."
Valron: "That's entirely fair."
King Demon looks around the area curiously.
Metal Man (GM): The inside of the base is a series of large rooms carved out of the now defunct Pyramid ship.
Several hallways have been opened up and there's dirt floors in areas, including plants for crops... and a lot of barracks with people training.
Indeed, everyone in this 'ship' is armed.
It's like Military Barracks: The Town.
Deathguard 3: "Here. Let me show you a video."
King Demon: "Hmmm? Oh, a movie?"
Metal Man (GM): He plays back a video of a bunch of Mad Max rejects wielding a bunch of stupid improbable weapons.
They come to the front door of the Pyramid ship.
Louisoix: "Surprised you could use a toilet like that."
Sloan Rebel: "Hey! You people in the ship! This is our ship now!"
Metal Man (GM): And then...
King Demon: "You've never seen the fanmade Mario movie."
Metal Man (GM): The door to the ship opens, and you see what is basically a horde of the most elite Borne troops combined with Goa'uld stream out and completely destroy them.
Louisoix: "Is it any good?"
Deathguard 3: "We have had the ability to completely destroy those people in those other cities. Their lack of military discipline makes them weak.
But... why?
We'd need something to do other than just demonstrating weaklings in freak outfits die easily."
King Demon: "It was an unlicensed, fanmade movie using bargain basement costumes and props." *Shrugs* "It was funnier than hell, though likely unintentionally."
Valron: "...How often does that even happen, anyways? I can only imagine it's like dealing with mosquitoes at that point."
Louisoix: "Will note to see it later. Anyway."
Deathguard 3: "We have come to sometimes wield their skulls as maces, or as currency. There are surprisingly many worthless scum wielding Sloan's regalia on this planet. The more we see it, the more we see our only mistake was not conquering Alsa.
However, given those Solarians massacred most of the people on Alsa who stayed... it is probably a cursed place still."
Valron: "Well... no. Alsa's actually been relatively peaceful as of late. Mind, it took a good deal of work, but..."
King Demon: *Shrugs.*
Deathguard 3: "Who runs GUN there now?"
Valron: "It's currently run by David Hale."
Deathguard 3: "Ah... a weak man with no spine, but, a fair one. We could conquer his entire administration, but... if it is peaceful there, they don't need us anymore."
King Demon: "Yeah, Borne and Marley are gone from there, as are most of the other antagonistic groups and individuals."
Valron: "Add to it the demon in the planet's core that had been the cause of all those problems has been dealt with."
Deathguard 3: "Borne... he died fighting against the cancer that struck our fair planet. We are forever in his debt. ...Marley helped the Solarian who nearly killed everyone. It's probably for the best he vanished. ...There was a monster there? Hm... one of us should eventually visit to confirm the veracity of these rumors..."
King Demon: "Hmmmm..."
Valron: "Currently, we're trying to find a way to make it no longer evil so that it can be safe to leave it running. The key causes seems to be a few missing parts... If you want, I could show you some images of the machine itself."
Deathguard 3: "Unfortunately we aren't the greatest at science, so that we cannot do much about. ...So. What are you here for, in general? If you don't care so much about cleaning out those people over there that are ruining the main city here..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, we do want to get rid of the chaos there, so that even if the people aren't innocent, they aren't dying completely senselessly. ...And perhaps some lost technology?"
Deathguard 3: "..." *Raises eyebrow* "And what exactly is this lost technology going to do?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, we have something very dangerous we have to deal with that most likely only the lost tech will help with. But we don't need or want the really powerful stuff. It's more about what Sloan stole from Nintendus."
Deathguard 3: "...Oh."
Metal Man (GM): The Deathguard takes out his data-computer and looks up some things.
Deathguard 3: "...We would actually prefer it if you took everything stolen from Nintendus off of this planet."
Editor's Note: *Plays a drum rimshot in response to the punchline*
King Demon: "How much is there?"
Deathguard 3: "There is something unnatural about all of it, and we've been unable to ensure it remains safe from those maniacs in the capital--if only because we don't want to store it here, but that military base the Sloan fanatics still hold won't hold forever. Sloan... went back in time and stole one or two science labs."
Valron: "Huh... How peculiar."
Deathguard 3: "He apparently followed Xavier back there and acquired some things from this 'Stadium.' He wished to create his own Questers and then conquer the universe by making them the only true Questers while erasing all of you. Convoluted and stupid, I know. Doubly stupid because we're better than any Questers he could make.
But he was obsessed.
Privately he would rant about how his own supporters were 'deranged ex-cons without intelligence' and how he wished to have someone inspiring on his side.
However, we were only here to take refuge and defended his places only so we could remain safe here."
Valron: "Sounds like a real mess. Have to wonder who he considered as 'inspiring', though..."
Deathguard 3: "Once he did we needed none of his approval anymore. Let me show you the room."
Louisoix: "Well, all that matters is that we figure out what he stole, anyway."
Metal Man (GM): The Deathguard opens a door and walks to a more... dilapidated part of the ship.
There, one can see some old wreckage from what looks like part of Sloan's Pyramid ship.
The ruined throne, the place where Energia sat...
The tally of times he fooled the Questers..
..And finally, a poster of "The Sloansters."
Complete with tagline!
"They're Teenagers With Attitude, and Appreciation For Unusual Things!"
Metal Man (GM): It shows a bunch of people wearing weird Back to the Future-esque faux-futuristic weapons and armor and doing inspiring action poses.
Valron: "...I'm not sure why, but I feel like there's a serious copyright violation in there somewhere..."
Metal Man (GM): Other scenes on the poster show them beating up random street thugs.
The final bit is most mysterious though.
Louisoix: "There's the answer to your question."
Metal Man (GM): Sloan is shown being their inspirational leader, wearing a slightly more toned back brown-and-gray jacket, and standing on the shoulder of a massive mecha.
Deathguard 3: "He said once he had the reality alteration device ready, he'd try to recruit you, and if you said no, he'd make this the true reality."
King Demon: "Cool looking mech."
Deathguard 3: "Oh... that mech is on this planet, by the way."
King Demon: "It is?" *Ok, that got his attention.*
Deathguard 3: "You might not want to encounter it, though."
Valron: "...Not gonna lie, seeing Sloan in something that isn't the end result of several clowns going to town without rhyme or reason is a little disconcerting. How nasty is the mech?"
Deathguard 3: "It is sentient. It explained that Sloan nearly conquered some sort of 'Stadium' elsewhere and failed, but that it, the mech, has an idea for how it could do it by itself."
King Demon: "Sentient? Awww!"
Deathguard 3: "It's obviously insane. But it's a 50 foot tall humanoid mech powered by bizarro tech that can smash things to bits."
Louisoix: "I imagine we'll run into it whether we like it or not."
Deathguard 3: "Some of the Sloan Rebels worship it as their God."
Valron: "...Huh. How peculiar. Is it still undyingly loyal to Sloan, or...?"
King Demon: "Knowing us, it's inevitable we'll find it."
Deathguard 3: "It isn't 100% loyal to Sloan. It believes it is smarter than him. Given it survived and he didn't. Maybe it IS smarter than him."
King Demon: "More indestructible, anyway."
Deathguard 3: "It doesn't seem to specifically want to kill you, mind you. I don't think it knows what a Quester is, or if it does, it never mentions them."
Valron: "Certainly a lot more durable, in any case."
Deathguard 3: "It speaks instead of a Smash Stadium. And also of ponies. And dragons. It's irreversibly insane. Because it said ponies were what ninja-dragons become.
If you blow it up, we'll pay you a nice price.
...It is really hard to kill."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Eheh... yeah... it's horribly insane... I totally never went to another Stadium that may or may not have had ponies, dragons or ninja in it... nope." *Whistles innocently.*
Valron: "...I see." *He just seems to be balking at the whole thing about ponies.*
Deathguard 3: "Our most scientifically-inclined people, of which there are few, and are not very inclined, guess that it went insane when Sloan died. No instructions to tell it what to do, you know?"
Valron: "Makes sense."
Deathguard 3: "Just... operating on whatever comes into its mind."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes... that is truly what it is doing. Eheh. Eheh."
Deathguard 3: "I would ask what you mean, Metallic Man, but, you probably would say something equally insane."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "No, it's all right... I don't know why that mech would know of the other world I visited when I was insane, but... ...that's probably also why Sloan thought he could take me out, long ago."
King Demon: "Well, it makes sense to him..."
Valron: "Hrm. Certainly something to figure out."
Deathguard 3: "The labs with what you originally mentioned exist, though, on the base with the loyalist Sloan fanatics. You'll have to figure out what to do about that. We would have taken it if we knew a way that wouldn't be extremely long and deadly."
Valron: "Any other notable problems aside from the giant mech?"
Deathguard 3: "Besides the biker gangs that rule the main city, the fact the Sloan remnants are plotting to try to revive him and could maybe possibly succeed sometime--not that I really find Sloan to be a threat--and the fact that we've seen Time Cop scouts figuring out if they could convince one of the many factions on this planet to try to sell or give it to them... no, not really."
King Demon: "Time Cops? Ugh..."
Deathguard 3: "We've been killing their scouts, whenever we can find them.
It's just that inevitably they might make the correct offer to the wrong person."
Louisoix: "Well, stability will help keep this place neutral, so it would be a good idea to get to work."
Valron: "Hrm. Not really a fan of the remnants that're trying to revive Sloan. I mean, it'd be a bit of a pain if he did get revived, but I'd rather just nip that in the bud. And if we can deal with the other factions and just leave the controlling stakes for this planet in your hands..."
Deathguard 3: "If you take out the remnants, the rebels will be relatively easy to mop up. The remnants have been feeding the rebellion by telling them if one of them wins, they will be promoted to an official unit of Sloan's. Never mind that Sloan is dead."
Valron: "Not especially bright, to say the least..."
Deathguard 3: "As for dealing with the Sloan Remnants... we can give you a keycard that'll let you in. That's about it though. We don't know anything else. They are one of the most anti-Quester forces in the universe, even if they lack the weaponry to make good on it outside of their own base.
I don't think you'll even be able to talk to them so much as be shot at the moment they recognize you."
Valron: "I appreciate the help, in any case. Having that, along with some information to go on does help, after all."
Metal Man (GM): The Deathguard hands the keycard to Valron.
Deathguard 3: "We just want to see those dumbass motherfuckers die, more or less."
Louisoix: "Well put."
Deathguard 3: "They came here, assured us they were the best, then ended up just protecting their own asses while we had to fight out in the forest and eat twigs for the first couple of weeks."
Valron: *He nods, taking the keycard* "Can't say I blame you in the slightest."
Deathguard 3: "Sloan died, and, they had so much pride they didn't bother to come after you. Better to hide in their techno-fortress, the only place in the universe where it'll take you 20 minutes to kill them instead of 20 seconds."
Valron: "The lot of them were just parasites riding the coattails of a badly-dressed rat. ...Well, they still are, all things considered. Considering they're trying to hide behind his name and whatnot."
Deathguard 3: "That's why I'm not too convinced they want to truly resurrect him. He told them to go do things and die for him.
Pretty certain dying isn't on their planned list of things to do."
Valron: "Maybe more like a dictatorial puppet or something? I don't know. Don't really care to know what goes on in their heads, either."
Louisoix: "Could be a political ploy. Say he's alive, then bark orders as if Sloan told them. They sound dumb enough for it to work."
Deathguard 3: "Cowards do what cowards always do. Whatever keeps 'em alive."
Valron: "Sounds about right. In any case, if there isn't anything else... We'll be off to get all that dealt with."
Deathguard 3: "Best of luck with that, then."
Metal Man (GM): The way out opens up, and they idly nod, then go back to training.
Valron: *He returns the nod, then heads on out.*
Xavier Ridgecrest nods and also heads out.
Louisoix nods to them and heads out as well.
"Well, bet 1000 out of the next paycheck we run into that mech."
Valron: "Not placing a single coin against that bet, Lou."
Louisoix: "Oh well. If we do deal with it, its scrap parts for your mech."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "With our luck it'll arrive, surfing on the shoulders of whatever blew up that planet, and then Autumnus and Dark Nonna will show up and say 'It's Hammer Time.'"
Louisoix: "Ha."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Bonus points if Kales Brando randomly kills half of them when we start to come to terms with the doom coming for us."
Valron: "And then Lyx watches on with a pair of binoculars before putting them down, sipping some tea and just nodding as it goes on."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...I wouldn't want to be a life insurance person trying to estimate what our policy should be right now."
King Demon: "They'd go broke."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Depending on what happens, we could be famous people who save the universe... ...or so extremely dead nobody figures out we ever existed."
King Demon: "Though, what'd be higher, our life insurance policy rates or the bounties that various groups put on us?"
Valron: "Our premium would probably be so high that you could surf from Nintendus to Erastia on it."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "It's a good day to be a Quester... ...and also probably a bad one. I'd start smoking if I did such a thing. Probably the bounties, due to how hard it is to make us dying stick."
Valron: "More than likely."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "The insurance rates, while high, after a point, the person will return a profit due to the fact killing us is hard. So they can bet we'd live for a while, it's just if they lose that bet it's gonna suck.
So they'd probably hedge against our death somehow, maybe by limiting the reasons they'd pay out.
Like insure against common cases like our eventual untimely demise from natural causes or freak accidents but leave out incidents with reality-rending demonic forces.
If only because, well, those are more likely to be our fault rather than an actual unknown to insure against."
Metal Man (GM): The group goes to walk to the ship, and... gets there without issue.
A lone Sloan Rebel almost reaches the group, but they get shot between the eyes by a Deathguard.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Note to self: Do not tick off Deathguards."
Valron: "I figured that goes without saying."
Louisoix: "What gave you that impression? Their aim or their name?"
Valron: "Yes."
King Demon looks for anything useful on the body, if it's close enough.
Metal Man (GM): You look at the body. The body contains:
1. Sloan Rebel Headdress
2. Sloan Rebel Pistol (Mundane quality pistol, +5 damage, +5 accuracy, +5 outlandish sequins)
3. Sloan Rebel Beef Jerky (God only knows what it is made out of, heals 15 HP)
You get to the ship and... now I'll pause. Gotta rest, but, next session: Shooting up Sloan Soldiers (TM)
El Pauseo

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