Super Smash Quest - Story - Chapter 422: Dark Dork Destruction

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Date: December 23rd, 2007.
Trivia: Panzer is the only Original Quester to have also stuck around to the end of SSQ 1 AND have participated in the first and last missions ever.
Metal Man (GM): Everyone is at HQ.
Panzer is meandering outside, working on her tank. Second gear sticks a little, apparently.
Metal Man (GM): The HQ is decked out in Christmas decorations, as usual.
Dragoshi: *And, Dragoshi is reading his book. Even though the knowledge acquisitioned from it would be useless at a moment he just writes down notes. In his notepad.*
Metal Man (GM): The great plot device of doom (Literally a machine) is sitting in the lab. It is one of the few things not coated in tinsel.
Digifanatic is in his room, playing around with a few things on his instruments. Nothing festive for the moment, but if someone were to stop by and request something more seasonal, he'd be more than willing to do it.
Panzer finishes, and secures the tank back in it's garage. She walks into the base, scrubs free of oil and grease, and plops into a chair in the CC, with a bottle of Jagermeister.
Metal Man (GM): Professor Oak is making sure it works at the moment.
Deloth: *Studying Cure, Santa hat on. What'd you expect, the Spanish Inquisition?*
Panzer (is the Spanish Inquisition.)
Dragoshi: *Has no need for silly santa hats! He has his trusty YELLOW TOPHAT! >_>*
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man has just finished arranging a variety of presents under the tree... he's wearing green shoulder pads and cape this time of the year. It looks rather strange.
Panzer thinks he's trying to copy her all green style. Thief.
Metal Man (GM): Metal man speaks to himself in R&R... as usual.
Metal Man: "Hm. That finishes that. Now to take out the villains once and for all." *Chuckles.* "...If only it would be that simple..."
Panzer walks up behind Oak. "Boo."
Metal Man: "Hm. May as well see what is going on with the others." *Wanders off.*
Oak: "Gah! Oh... you. Interesting in this machine?" He turns around, showing a rather large, floating rectangular box. "It is... the dimensional repair system... ...the second one. The first one was blown up by Digi."
Panzer lifts a brow. "Not really. Unless it does something that makes things explode.":
Oak: "Ohhh... it makes things explode all right. But on an interdimensional level."
Panzer grins evilly.
Panzer: "Can I touch it?"
Dragoshi: *Also in R&R, as per usual. Yep. He would then take a glass of eggnog sitting on a nearby coffee table.*
Digifanatic: *As for seasonal clothing, well, does a green shirt count? Maroon is pretty close to red anyway...*
Oak: "Yes. It can't go off until it is in the right place, and when it does, it will actually make the world a better place. Just as long as you don't blow it up like Digi. I don't think E Li Three has a third one we could borrow."
Panzer lifts a brow. "Is it compatible with my systems?"
Oak: "Not exactly. It is a late-Earth style machine. So it's like interfacing with computers that, from what I hear, were already ancient in your time."
Panzer lifts a brow. "I'm from Earth. My systems date back a few centuries..."
Oak: "But compatible enough, I would guess. Especially since we modified it to work with our much more general control systems. This was made by the civilization which existed prior to the reploids and inevitably built them. At least, it's the same style. Probably a different dimension, but same design... Some extra parts afforded from the very last remnants of our Void-enhanced technology era. Those you'd know very well, having seen them everywhere for 10+ years here."
Panzer shrugs and looks around the device for something of a control panel. "Got a port or some sort of interface I can chat with... And can it sustain a fair amount of weight?"
Oak: "It has antigrav rated to a ton or two. It could probably be ridden on by all the Questers."
Panzer lifts a brow. "Just enough to hold me." She laughs.
Metal Man (GM): There is a panel on it, full of buttons, ports, and other things. The only problem is it's in a futuristic dialect... which, to Panzer, would be an ancient one. Dragoshi would be sitting in R&R. He'd see the neatly decorated Christmas tree. Deloth would be on the 4th to last chapter of the book for Cure.
Digifanatic: *In his room.*
Panzer hopefully manages to decipher it and press the necessary buttons to start up a conversation about how unconventional non-mechanical beings are, while sitting on the machine.
Dragoshi: "Meh...This 'nog is a little bland." *He would then pull out a smaller glass of the usual stuff he drinks, then pours that in with the eggnog. He then looks at the tree* "...Nice tree." *Gets back to readin'.*
Digifanatic stops playing music for now and Dexes the others. "Missing anything big right now?"
Metal Man (GM): Panzer activates long unused AI protocols. The machine begins talking.
Machine: "AI systems online. Main base missing. Earth Command not found. Cannot determine current location. Unknown modifications made to main system. Unknown advanced technology detected everywhere. Awaiting command."
Oak: "Hm, I didn't know it could do that... Perhaps we should save it when we're done with it. It could be useful."
Metal Man (GM): Oak's dex beeps. He takes it out.
Oak: "Oh, Digi. We're investigating the reality-repairing device right now."
Panzer: "They stole you from your home base, from what I understand. You're currently located in another place currently, thus. I am Panzer, a machine like yourself. I am known as a Reploid. Compute."
Oak: "Just don't touch it or blow anything up near it and I wouldn't mind you coming over."
Digifanatic: "Oh, of course. After last time I'm a bit weary about touching things like that, Professor!"
Machine: "Reploid. That is top secret information. You are obviously a prototype. Stolen from home base. Does not compute. No tampering has been done. Security protocols were followed in re-activation procedure. The only anomaly was the machine which re-activated me."
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi's dex beeps.
Digifanatic: *Basically the same information is relayed to Drago via Dex.*
Dragoshi: *Mutters, his reading interrupted. He then pulls out the Dex, and opens it*
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi is about three-fourths through the book he's reading.
Machine: "I detect subtle time-space location change. Internal timer is off by hundreds of years. Time flow adjustment in process."
Oak: "So... machine... what was unusual?"
Digifanatic stops playing for now; however, in case an important situation comes up--like Dr. Wily dressed up as Santa Claus--he grabs the GSPB-grade synthesizer normally associated with his "A Day in the Life" bit and puts in his "idle" position (behind his back.)
Digifanatic then heads to R&R once he's done shutting the systems off.
Machine: "Unknown unit E. Li. Three. Reactivated dimensional alteration machine. Using an unknown secret password. He said he was the last being around from my time in this dimension. He explained something about a Metal Man and that I may be used. Secondarily. That another unit without an AI might be destroyed."
Oak: "Hm... interesting."
Panzer rolls her eyes. "I'm not a prototype of the series. You missed all the wars and mavericks and crap by a while. I'm just an old piece of junk like you. Notorious sniper though."
Digifanatic: *arrives after enough time* "Hmm...tree looks nice."
Machine: "Old piece of junk. Then what purpose is my dimensional capability to be used? Unknown programming detected."
Deloth wanders in, book in hand. "What's up?"
Machine: "Unknown sentient being from the future. Do you have any commands? Error: What's up is an invalid command."
Metal Man (GM): Deloth sees... the machine is speaking. Odd. The other dimensional alteration machine could not speak.
Digifanatic: "Heck, everything looks nice." .oO(Although, I admit, there is a bit of political incorrectness here, but still, it's nice.)
Deloth: "...I didn't know that machine could talk."
Metal Man (GM): Digi saw Metal Man pacing in a hallway.
Digifanatic: "What's up with Metal? "
Machine: "Answer: Latent debugging AI was activated. Debug process is nearly complete. Machine has been repurposed to suit the needs of an advanced society."
Metal Man (GM): Only Dragoshi is around to hear Digi.
Digifanatic: "Huh...Dragoshi? Hello?"
Panzer continues to sit in it in silence and she sighs. "We're both antiquated machinery, you and I. I doubt you know anything about me in particular, really. I dunno anything of you."
Machine: "Light Systems Universe Repair Device #2947 Serial Number 182."
Dragoshi: *Too busy reading. Don't bother him.*
Machine: "I was made as a backup. As were hundreds of others. The storage capability of my mind is limited. If you know Dr. Light, you should ask him."
Digifanatic: .oO(Never mind...)
Digifanatic walks back into the hall and looks to Metal. "Something's wrong?"
Metal Man: "I'm nervous, understandably, about this second usage of the machine. What if it is jammed? What if it's a trap? What if the hole is another The Void? We won't know until it's too late."
Panzer shakes her head. "Doesn't ring a metaphorical bell." She reaches into a storage place in her armor and pulls out a very, very old and worn out piece of metal with several analytical markings and barcodes, holding it out to be scanned. "This is my information. It fell off because I'm so old. And, I've heard of Light. He allegedly died out before Reploids were made, after he sealed X away."
Digifanatic: "Oh, man..."
Oak: "Dr. Light... of course. Why else would he have known how to make it. I'll call him in." He walks to the phone.
Digifanatic: "Can't we just have SIMBER scan it?"
Metal Man: "It's not the machine, it's what will happen after it does its thing."
Digifanatic: "Er, Porygon?"
Dragoshi: "That's enough reading for now." *Puts the book away and takes his glass with him, going into the hallway.*
Metal Man: "It will repair the hole, but what will happen then?"
Digifanatic: "Oh."
Metal Man: Dragoshi would see Metal and Digi.
Digifanatic: "Hmm. Not really sure what to do."
Panzer crosses her arms. "What was going on with reploids at the time of your construction?"
Metal Man (GM): Dr. Light wanders into the lab. He seems decidedly unbothered by the machine talking.
Machine: "They were--"
Dr. Light: "Being developed. I would know, this machine carried a bank of my knowledge in case I died and it was left behind."
Panzer looks at Dr. Light. Most reploids would likely bow to him, but she didn't like him. She sighed.
Dragoshi: *Dragoshi would then walk up to the Digi and Metal, taking a sip from his glass* "Yo."
Panzer: "Yes. I know that. But good God. Us? Classified?"
Dr. Light: "Apparently I did die, judging from what happened in the dimension that takes place after Megaman saved the world."
Digifanatic: "Hello. Sorry if I bothered you."
Panzer bursts out laughing at the thought of Megaman.
Dr. Light: "Reploids were and are very, very dangerous. They have feelings... they can go Maverick... and they did, apparently."
Dragoshi: "Whatever..." *Continues drinking from his glass* "I probably didn't notice, in any case."
Dr. Light: "I made enough algorithms to keep the true next-generation robot from being that way."
Panzer: "We're not -that- dangerous..."
Dr. Light: "Clearly, my imitators were not ethical enough to copy those."
Panzer: "Robots? I have no use for robots. As for X? Pansy."
Dr. Light: "But I do not fault them... without me to guide them, how would they have known?"
Panzer might just blow some coding and oil over the crap he was saying.
Dr. Light: "But... as for why I am here and not trying to avert that future at the moment... it is because you brought up something important... that is, whoever turned on the AI."
Deloth: "Couldn't you have left them a 'don't do this' note or something?"
Panzer: "I wanted something recreational to talk to."
Dr. Light: "That's what this was for. But nobody found them."
Panzer: "Why couldn't you turn it on?" *rolls eyes.
Dr. Light: "Could that mean this was the only one left, and we just took it, dooming my world's future? I don't remember any reports of them in your time, Panzer."
Panzer: "I'm sure I've stepped on a few Doc. They're kind of junky out in deserted labs and stuff."
Dr. Light: "And the only one we had before was wreckage and the pseudo-replication an insane scientist made for his own misdeeds... Hmm... that leaves a dilemma."
Panzer: "Let me guess. Wily?"
Dr. Light: "If I sent this to my realm, I could avert the Mavericks and reploids entirely."
Panzer: "That is something I can't let you do."
Dr. Light: "But then your realm would be plagued by your own problems involving Trent Easton and his corporation. And there is that. It would erase you, and thus... .." He holds his head. "I hate time travel."
Panzer hops off the machine and stands over Light, eyes flashing a purply haze for an instant. "I like existing. The Maverick wars happened, and will always happen. Leave it be. That way when I have nothing left to fight here, and can go back to being a Hunter."
Dr. Light: "I do not like being the one who unintentionally doomed my own realm by trying to give it a savior."
Panzer: "You made way for better soldiers. You did your part. Too bad RepliForce didn't make it."
Dr. Light: "Because if things continue in your realm as they have, all planets and machines will eventually destroy one another. It makes Dr. Wily look like a joke, when you see entire space colonies destroyed."
Metal Man (GM): Then Metal Man wanders in and pokes Light in the shoulder.
Panzer: "Like Eurasia? I had a glass of wine to commemorate that."
Metal Man: "Hey, don't feel bad. I can't un-create the mistakes I made when The Void got loose."
Dragoshi: *And, Dragoshi follows Mettaur along, because yes. >_>*
Metal Man: "If I did, we'd all be dead!" *Bad laughter.*
Panzer turns back to the machine. "So. Any hobbies?"
Machine: "Constant self-maintenance and waiting to be discovered by people who need Dr. Light's knowledge."
Digifanatic: *heads over.*
Deloth: "Hmm..."
Panzer lifts a brow. "No one does anymore. I'm sure I can dismantle you and turn you into a reploid, like myself. Or a robot if you wish to go without conflicting emotions."
Metal Man: "Well, it's about time we used the machine here. Sorry if you're addicted to talking to it--using it will knock the personality off line, and you'll need to rebuild it if you want to keep talking to it."
Panzer: "That way you could get around and I'd have someone that is a good fighter to stand with me...
Valentine Kilmer: *She hovers into the Lab not too long afterwards as well.* "I take it the damaged machine is up and running?"
Deloth: "Hey, Light, like I said, why not just write a note or something that says 'don't do this or the Reploids'll say nuts to the human race'?"
Machine: "It is for the best that I remain this way until they are done utilizing me to protect a realm from unknown thing number five."
Dr. Light: "I already put warnings like that with X. Nobody listened, apparently."
Panzer: "Oooh. A number five?"
Dragoshi: "Does anybody ever freaking listen, though?"
Panzer: "Light, no one liked X. Zero and myself always played pranks on him... I miss Zero."
Machine: "Some sort of interdimensional hole. Dr. Light never imagined that use until I wound up in this dimension."
Panzer: "X was too much a girlybot."
Dr. Light: "So my mistake was not giving him enough aggression to make my warnings stick. Too bad I've already made him, and, I cannot return to my original time due to being here now..."
Valentine Kilmer: "I think it's best if we get started, Metal Man."
Dr. Light: "I guess I'll have to settle with saving this realm."
Panzer: "You can always go back to being dead."
Metal Man: "On that note. Somebody help me wheel it out to the field." *Begins moving the floating device out of the lab and towards the door.*
Panzer grumbles. "I wasn't done talking to it. Jeez. You people couldn't figure that thing out for anything."
Metal Man: "We need to use it... and then we can all party. And, since it was a freebie from E Li anyway, if Panzer wants the used up hulk, she can have it."
Deloth helps push as well. Stupid time paradoxes, making his head spin.
Metal Man: "Well, I'd have spent more time figuring it out, but that time was taken up with Digi annihilating the first one."
Panzer: "It's not a hulk. Be nice to machines.
Valentine Kilmer: "You may take a trip down memory lane when the mission is complete, Panzer."
Metal Man: "So a while was spent simply hoping for another one."
Digifanatic: "Again, I'm not touching it."
Metal Man: "Ah, I know. E Li Three got it. Maybe he'd know what it's all about."
Dr. Light: "More so than me???"
Valentine Kilmer: "That would be wise."
Panzer huffs and walks out, muttering about getting in touch with Zero.
Metal Man: "To tell the truth, Dr. Light, you didn't understand the ramifications of sentient machines in the first place. Otherwise Dr. Wily would have his robots, and... yeah."
Dr. Light: "Hm. I shall return to my studies of the apocalyptic remains of my world, then."
Panzer finds SIMBER if he's around. "SIMBER?"
Metal Man (GM): He walks to his lab.
SIMBER: *Appears* "Systems nominal. Yes?"
Metal Man (GM): Meanwhile, Metal Man and Deloth exit the door.
Dragoshi: *In any case, he follows Mettaur.*
Digifanatic: *Might as well follow.*
Valentine Kilmer: *She follows, this time to make sure no one touches unknown machines.*
Panzer: "Feed me all particulars of that machine that was in there."
SIMBER: "It is an unknown machine acquired from a test by E Li Three. After Digi blew up the first one, which Metal Man, Dr. Light, and Professor Oak, and Dr. Carrol slaved on just to work. It has the ability to undo dimensional disruptions. Dr. Light says he made it as an experiment, after he had 'mastered' machine sentience."
Panzer: "...They're idiots. All you need to do to get any machine to work is feed it the proper commands."
Metal Man (GM): The Questers make their way out over a hill.
SIMBER: "The machine was ready to work, AI on or off. The AI was not activated as, with Dr. Light around, it was redundant. Who needs the wisdom of Dr. Light, when Dr. Light is around to ask? Although due to limited storage, it has less scruples than Dr. Light."
Panzer: "Because Dr. Light makes no sense at all. And talking to a machine is more practical."
Metal Man (GM): The sun's out, it's about the same time it was the first time you guys pushed the machine. You're making your way to a bit to the left of the first crater. 'Cause that was bad mojo.
Panzer: "Compute the theory that the machine can help me calculate the where-abouts of Zero."
Metal Man: "So, Questers, are you ready? I bet we'll encounter Trent here... that weird man said so in the log."
SIMBER: "Zero was not created when the machine was made. Approximately zero point one percent."
Deloth: *takes out his sword* "Ready."
Digifanatic: "I'm good."
Panzer grumbles. "Zero does exist though. I wasn't made when the machine was, but I still exist."
SIMBER: "However, I should mention this..." He looks at Panzer. "The Questers are likely to experience a lot of enemies out there, and those enemies are likely to know. One possesses a book which knows almost everything about the future."
Valentine Kilmer: "Are you going to be the machine's shield, Metal?"
Metal Man: "I'll try my best, yes. I'll also operate it, so we don't accidentally turn it on and not realize it's being jammed."
Panzer: "It is of no use to me if it can't find things other than what was existing at the time. ...Enemies? O RLY? Interesting. The Questers will kill them. Or try to anyway."
Metal Man: "This one's got more security protocols. Gimme a moment."
Valentine Kilmer: "Then I have a second request."
SIMBER: "Dead enemies drop what they're holding."
Valentine Kilmer: "Shoot anyone that goes near it. Including your questers."
SIMBER: "Ganondorf has the Dark Prognosticus. Extended usage of it would corrupt you. But one line would not. Of course, you're a machine. It can't spiritually corrupt a soulless being."
Panzer: "Line?"
SIMBER: "A line of text, which would reference where to find Zero. It's a prophetic book."
Metal Man: "Okay then. I'll advise all of you to stand clear."
Metal Man begins to work on the machine. "Security protocol one... authorization of Dr. Light or X. Already entered, so I just do this." *Turns a key.*
Machine: "Check 1 has been cleared."
Panzer: "I have too many things to ask that machine and if they're going to burn it up trying to fix some stupid dimension, then I can't promise that I'll be good and let them live. Calculate probability that Zero is within the Realm?"
SIMBER: "Zero. Ha ha. Bad pun. X would know, but he's in his realm."
Metal Man: "Safety protocol two..."
Valentine Kilmer: "Wait. We might have a problem if Ganondorf and Trent shows up."
Dragoshi: *Has his Dark Sword ready, looking around just in case any particular annoyances pop up. >_>* "You know, I wonder if this occurred to anyone. But, what if Ganondorf's annoying little book also predicted this? I mean, after all, if it predicted the whole thing with the first machine, then..."
Metal Man: "If the machine has run its course, they won't be able to do anything but harm us. Should I proceed or should we wait?"
Panzer: "Hahaha. ...I hate X. Probability that if I traveled to another realm, could time be distorted to the point where I would arrive before RepliForce was taken down?"
Digifanatic: "Hmm... maybe take it to the least likely place where the book would predict us to be?"
Valentine Kilmer: "Is Link taken care of everything else again?"
Metal Man: "Yes. The best he can do."
Valentine Kilmer: "Proceed."
SIMBER: "Zero, again. Otherwise Dr. Light would have done it. The Void would have given you access... but he's deeeaaaad."
Valentine Kilmer: "I'll advise you to call reinforcements when it looks back."
Metal Man: "Affirmative. Check two: Swipe this card."
Machine: "Procedure two of six completed. Preliminary warm up procedures activated."
Panzer: "Then I will prolong my studies. I will find a way to retrieve my Commander. Otherwise, I can't predict how much longer I'll obey orders. Should I go and join the others or stay here?"
Valentine Kilmer: "Just no throwing kool-aid at people again."
SIMBER: "There is more information to be found with them. Their enemies are savvy of all realms they've gone to. It is likely they might hide knowledge of how to go to that time you wish."
Panzer: "I'm sure they don't know who or what I am though."
Metal Man: "Procedure three... an eye scan for the record."
Metal Man takes off his helmet and looks at the eye scan part.
Machine: "Procedure three complete."
Metal Man puts his helmet back on and then types in a very long code.
Metal Man: "Individual access code... beginning work on that."
SIMBER: "That is to be your advantage."
Panzer: "I'll just take up a position to watch them from a distance. Bug me if you need something."
SIMBER: "I shall."
Metal Man: "Procedure four... this is the point of no return, as its life will be limited to three days if not activated after this."
Metal Man opens a panel to the side, showing the main power source and the generator. "I do this, simply." *Turns the device, engaging the contacts. *
Valentine Kilmer: "I'll go into hiding to set up an ambush for Ganondorf. I need a Quester for assistance."
Panzer turns and leaves, taking up a long, out of the way route around them and the sight, setting up her rifle on the sight in which they all were, using her camoflauge ability.
Machine: "Procedure four complete. Device is armed and awaiting coordinates."
Metal Man (GM): The machine is activating... slowly. Metal Man is apparently doing it as carefully as possible.
Metal Man: "For the next part..." *Cracks his knuckles and types in some coordinates.*
Machine: "Unknown coordinates one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, and eight entered."
Panzer narrows her eyes. It's not right to 'fix' a dimension, it means that several beings... Even on the scale of millions and billions can be killed.
Machine: "Warning: I do not know what those coordinates are. Proceed?"
Valentine Kilmer: "Dragoshi. I think you'll do."
Metal Man: "Proceed."
Machine: "Are you sure? There is no second try."
Metal Man: "I said proceed."
Panzer tries to analyze the energy type used by the machine.
Machine: "Affirmative."
Metal Man (GM): You'd see obvious cold fusion going on in it.
Machine: "Five of six completed. Press one more to complete."
Deloth: "Boy, is Trent in for one heck of a surprise..."
Metal Man: "I liked the one with no security measures on it..."
Panzer has a like system, wonders if she can disrupt by generating more energy than needed and overload the machine's power saved for the operation.
Metal Man: "You guys better not fool this time."
Metal Man (GM): If you got close and overloaded it, it might damage dimensions instead. Unless you caught it before Metal Man did number 6.
Valentine Kilmer: "I'll shoot them myself if that happens."
Metal Man: "Number six. Irreversible activation." *Takes the main panel off and moves to flip a switch.* "Any last reasons why not to flip this switch?"
Panzer doesn't. She was waiting to see what would happen. She fires a shot over Metal's head as a warning.
Valentine Kilmer: "Make sure the questers are ready first, Metal Man."
Digifanatic: "We've got to finish them off sometime...and yes, I'm ready."
Deloth: "I don't see--" *YIKES! Where'd THAT come from?!*
Dragoshi: "None that I can think of." :/ *Just stands there, tapping his foot.*
Metal Man: "I'm afraid we may not have that luxury, Val. That shot was clearly a warning." *Flips the switch.* "Fully activated, process has begun."
Metal Man (GM): It fires a gigantic beam into the sky.
Deloth whips his sword into battle position and looks around for whoever fired that gunshot...
Metal Man (GM): A portal opens up and the beam flies into it. Reality itself shakes a little.
Machine: "Coordinates found... corresponding energy signatures found. Exact dimensional damage found."
Panzer contacts Metal through private comm. "Don't... -.- Bastard." She huffs and shuts off the communication and rises, uncamouflages herself. She exerts large, dangerous levels of excess radiation caused by her highly advanced fission reactions.
Metal Man (GM): Trent Easton flies out of the warp unexpectedly. Trent Easton gets up with his assault rifle.
Dragoshi: "Oh, hey, Trent. You're just in time to die."
Valentine Kilmer: "As predicted."
Trent Easton: "Noooo!! That'll re-kill me! I can't let that happen!" He then sees Panzer.
Deloth: *Oh, joy, both Panzer AND Trent to kill.*
Trent Easton: "Don't think you can kill me with a robot, fools!"
Dragoshi: *Stands in the way of Trent, because yes.*
Trent Easton: "Die, robot!"
Metal Man (GM): He hurls an EMP grenade at Panzer, like the idiot he is.
Valentine Kilmer: "Metal Man. Let the questers handle Trent. We will distract Ganondorf when he arrives."
Metal Man: "I shall ensure the machine completes its task."
Machine: "Beginning gamma reconstruction routine."
Deloth: "Panz, what the HELL are you doing?!"
Trent Easton: "You can't use that machine! It'll... it'll... it'll..."
Metal Man (GM): He can't seem to think of any reason that'd appeal to you.
Valentine Kilmer: "Detain Trent. Quickly."
Metal Man (GM): The EMP does as it would normally. It disables Panzer... for a few rounds.
Machine: "Dangerous levels of radiation detected from prototype reploid."
Metal Man (GM): Trent turns around to the machine and points his gun at it.
Trent Easton: "By the way, I finished reloading. Die, machine!"
Metal Man (GM): He goes to pull the hammer... Er, trigger.
Deloth runs and tries to tackle Trent's legs to keep that from happening, because no.
Panzer 's eyes loose their color and large discharges of steam are released from vented areas, she now is about as good as a statue.
Metal Man: "The Questers will not stop him in time, Val. Allow me."
Metal Man takes out his gun and fires at Trent Easton.
Metal Man (GM): Trent Easton is shot in the thigh. Then he's tackled.
Trent: "Gahhh!"
Deloth: "Shut up, you." *makes to stab Trent in the spine with his sword.*
Dex: "Dangerous radiation levels from unit Panzer! Danger! Danger!"
Dragoshi: "Now, if I could have that assault rifle of mine back..."
Metal Man: "Hm... we can't warp her away... too dangerous."
Metal Man (GM): Trent is basically disabled.
Valentine Kilmer: "...What is Panzer trying to prove?"
Metal Man: "Somebody do something about Panzer. I don't care what, but if this machine is irradiated too much, it'll do more than just correct our problems. Hm... yes. Backup."
Metal Man (GM): *Takes out his dex* "Samus, report immediately to the area. Radiation hazard. Contain it now." Trent is passed out. He was shot and is now being irradiated. Deloth is being irradiated too.
Machine: "15% complete."
Metal Man (GM): You notice Trent's gun beginning to vanish. Dragoshi's gun is also sent back to Dragoshi. Like he never messed with it.
Deloth gets up... whoa, everything feels radiation-burny.
Dragoshi: *Now that that's done with...Dragoshi switches out the DS for the K7.*
Metal Man (GM): Samus runs in, just as Panzer wakes up again. Panzer sees Samus running at you. The machine has already partially run through its course. Trent Easton has been stopped.
Valentine Kilmer: "I suppose prosthetic bodies can remain in the area."
Metal Man: "I'm protected, but only because of my suit."
Digifanatic: "Panzer, don't hurt Samus..."
Panzer growls, hearing high level alarms in her head, standing still as she works internally to shut down all non-critical processes to start retaining the excess radiation again, and screening to clean it to the point of no danger to life. She contains it, but can't stop what has escaped. Steam stops venting and she re opens all her systems, looking at Samus. "Touch me and Die."
Metal Man (GM): Samus silently dials her communicator.
Panzer: "I can't stop the radiation that has escaped, but the currently made type is being filtered."
Deloth: *Isn't ALL radiation dangerous to life?*
Metal Man (GM): Samus says nothing. Instead, her ship flies over and attaches an energy tether to Panzer... ...and flies off.
Deloth has probably been nicely microwaved by now... owie.
Machine: "Radiation levels are holding steady. Recalibration partially successful."
Metal Man: "All right... Deloth, are you okay?"
Digifanatic: *Has no idea what's been happening to him cause he's been on and off for a while.*
Valentine Kilmer: "Thank you can have Samus take Trent back to the jail?"
Metal Man (GM): Deloth would have taken a bunch radiation damage and Trent would be still passed out.
Deloth: *calmly* "I don't think so, no."
Panzer grumbles and is not happy... Starts shooting up the ship if not restrained.
Metal Man (GM): The ship takes the damage rather well... considering it's now over the ocean and gaining height, it'll be a while before Panzer can escape it.
Panzer: "Dammit you bitch! I can't stop it from escaping if I'm deactivated like that! Not my fault!"
Dragoshi: "So...Would anyone object to me possibly, maybe...*Says this really fast*blastingTrentoffthefaceoftheplanet?"
Panzer fires at any weak looking spots in the hull.
Metal Man (GM): Not many. A maniac once stomped on it and it took about 50 minutes of nonstop smashing to destroy it.
Deloth: "Not me. Metal, what would you suggest for severe radiation burns?"
Metal Man: "Take a salt tablet. Er. Mushroom or two."
Metal Man (GM): Dr. Carrol walks up.
Dr. Carrol: "The machine is slightly off. I need to adjust it before it's too late. The radiation isn't going anywhere soon. If I don't adjust it, it'll have been a waste."
Digifanatic: *starts heading out of the way just in case he has been hit...*
Metal Man: "Hm. Considering you made the machine, I'd trust you."
Valentine Kilmer: "Wait, Metal Man."
Dr. Carrol: "We don't have time to wait. It will begin damaging unrelated fabric in only a matter of seconds."
Metal Man: "He made the first one partially and was the one who mentioned the dimensional rip in the first place. I'd ask Dr. Light, but he's not crazy enough to run into this irradiated area."
Panzer calls Metal. "Tell this bitch to put me down. THIS INSTANT! I'm fine! I've always made that radiation. The only reason it got out was because you dumbasses let me be knocked off line without proper reactor shut down. You've all been around cleaned radiation from my system whenever I'm near and it does no harm!"
Metal Man: "And Deloth, you really need to get out of that spot. It's all full of radiation."
Valentine Kilmer: "I'm not doubting Dr. Carrol's creation. Just that one standing in front of us."
Deloth: "I think my legs got microwaved."
Metal Man talks to his communicator. "I'm sorry, your radiation is breaking up the signal. I only heard Instant, Fine, and perhaps some references to Radiation."
Panzer: "Bullshit."
Metal Man: "Pull a ship? What?" *Turns to Val* "I don't think we have the time to be arguing this."
Machine: "Preparing to re-fire to continue process..."
Panzer looks through her scope and locates them if still withing range and fires a barrage of shots, trying to hit them if possible.
Metal Man (GM): Panzer is far away and... manages to barely hit some rocks on a beach.
Valentine Kilmer: "Watch the good doctor closely then."
Metal Man: "That I will do."
Metal Man (GM): Dr. Carrol runs up and urgently types in some things, as the radiation burns the area where Deloth was.
Panzer tries to open a c/l to the machine. "Stop this! You're upsetting the balance and possibly destroying millions of lives! If you continue then I will declare you maverick and destroy you."
Metal Man (GM): Trent Easton mutters as he begins to wake up.
Valentine Kilmer: "Don't let him wake up."
Metal Man looks at his comms. "Hmmm... I wish I knew what that angry static was saying... perhaps it could be helpful."
Dragoshi: *Has his rifle aimed on Trent* "Should I arrange for this to be his resting spot, then?"
Machine: "Unknown transmission detected. Cannot decipher information. Adjustments complete."
Valentine Kilmer: "Just knock him out for now."
Machine: "Firing readjustment ray."
Valentine Kilmer: "We're not killers."
Deloth whacks Trent on the skull with the blunt edge of his sword.
Metal Man (GM): The ray fires again. Reality shakes. Deloth whacks Trent. But reality's change causes Trent to get up. He's now burned and his gun seemingly melted. He tries to fire a shot... nothing comes out. He chucks it at the machine... it vanishes mid-air.
Dragoshi: *Good thing Drag still has his rifle trained on him.*
Deloth: *looking at Trent* "...Toasty."
Trent Easton: "Argh!!! It's too late!"
Panzer growls. She sees the ray and curses. She thrashes around and fires everywhere. She mentally stakes them all as Mavericks, as per her 'instinct' programming and they're added to the hit list. She starts to release even higher levels of pure, unfiltered radiation.
Deloth: "I agree completely!" *sword slash to Trent's chest.*
Trent Easton: "You don't know what you've done... that ray will... will..." *Slash.*
Metal Man (GM): He falls to his knees.
Dragoshi: "...The ray will what. What?"
Trent Easton: "Ganondorf plans---"
Valentine Kilmer: "...Don't you questers listen?"
Metal Man (GM): A dark beam of purple energy vaporizes Trent from behind. Ganondorf appears at the center of the radiation. He has become more powerful now. He waves a hand and the radiation is gone.
Digifanatic: "Uh oh...here we go..."
Dragoshi: "...I...Well. That was unexpected, in a way."
Ganondorf: "The truth is... Trent Easton was a poor assistant at best."
Panzer smirks. Puts her reactors into hyperdrive, internal needles peaking just a few clicks below critical, vents opening fully to release the harmful stuff everywhere. It's about 2.3 times as strong as the radiation near then. The farther Samus goes, the more land is irradiated to near fatal levels.
Panzer: "Maybe the reports of death will make him listen to me."
Ganondorf: "But what you have done has impressed me. For..." He stops mid-sentence, sensing the imminent radiation on the other side of the world. "Hmph."
Metal Man (GM): Panzer and the ship, and the radiation, suddenly vanish into a purple portal.
Metal Man: "What was that about?"
Valentine Kilmer: "This isn't looking good."
Dr. Carrol: "The machine is working as planned. The anomalies are going away."
Deloth: "Look, considering your win/loss record prior to this, you can save some time just by giving up now."
Metal Man: "Then why is Ganondorf in favor of it?"
Ganondorf: "Because of this." He holds up the book.
Dragoshi: "Ah, yes. That thing."
Metal Man (GM): The book is... losing its luster.
Panzer: "Confounded... Fucking...I swear to God..." She stops, seeing she's gone. She crosses her arms and grumbles, vents closing and radiation returning to optimal screened levels, harmless as always.
Ganondorf: "This cursed book predicted doom for all of you... including me. It predicted a second Void... I couldn't have that..."
Valentine Kilmer: "The Void is returning?"
Dragoshi: "I really don't blame you."
Ganondorf: "And now... it is all right so I can finally finish my feud with you... in the fashion I imagined."
Digifanatic: "Second Void?"
Metal Man (GM): Dr. Carrol turns to Ganondorf.
Digifanatic: .oO(Oh man...why this again?)
Deloth: "Yeah. Problem is that now there's no pending Void and you have a rabid attack squad of Questers ready to turn you into meatloaf."
Panzer tries climbing up the energy harness.
Dr. Carrol: "Wait a minute... you're obviously the one who could have caused the Megawarp reaction."
Dragoshi: "Second Void, huh...Sounds like something out of a cheesy...err...What's the thing I'm thinking of..."
Metal Man (GM): Panzer is in the Dark World. She slowly climbs up the tether.
Dr. Carrol: "Your powers must be greater than you are going onto!"
Ganondorf: "What? That is impossible."
Valentine Kilmer: "Metal Man. If it comes to the worse. Call that mad man."
Panzer eventually reaches the top, and tries to find a hatch and pull it open.
Metal Man: "The machine is 50% done."
Dragoshi: "No. It's very plausible."
Metal Man (GM): Samus' ship is heavily damaged by now and flying blind.
Dex: "Dimensional instability is decreasing."
Ganondorf: "I wished to end my feud, but the old ways tried to return. Now we are on even ground again. Do you fools understand that, or will I have to put some of you in prisms to make my point clear?" He laughs.
Panzer works on wrenching it open and trying to crawl in.
Metal Man: "Hm. I can't be sure if Ganondorf is telling the truth or not."
Metal Man (GM): Panzer gets inside. It's... a wreck. Stuck on flying in a straight line at that.
Panzer hisses and looks around. "Samus, you dumb bitch, come here."
Deloth narrows his eyes. This is just not adding up...
Ship Communicator: "Out of range. Comms array broken."
Dragoshi: *Just stands there, letting the others talk. >_>*
Metal Man (GM): A warp appears out of nowhere near the machine... ...it's that so-called 'Dark Master'.
Ganondorf: "You see, this means--"
Panzer: "So the fucking whore left me in some freakish loop or something? Compute back tracking course and take it."
Dark Master: "Aha! The traitor has decided to assist the fools! I shall put an end to this thing. The Dark Prognosticus cannot be stopped!"
Valentine Kilmer: "That's why you need to be ready to call in extra help, even if it is that insane armored man, Metal. Looks like it's getting worse for us."
Metal Man (GM): It's a man about 6 feet tall in dark clothes. Skinny, weird mustache, he looks totally evil with red eyes. He holds out his hands at the machine and fires a beam of lightning at the machine. Dr. Carrol leaps into the way, stopping it.
Dragoshi: *Looks at the Dark Master* "...Okay, this is getting fucking dumb." *Aims his rifle at the Dark Master.*
Dr. Carrol: "You... shall not... restart the evil... Guh." *Passes out.*
Ganondorf: "The Dark Master is our true enemy. Kill him!"
Deloth: "Drag, stop aiming, start FIRING!"
Dark Master: "You cannot stop me with self-sacrifice!"
Dragoshi: *Fires at the Dark Master. Twice. Because, seriously, I should start firing now.*
Metal Man: "...Dr. Carrol is dead."
Metal Man (GM): Dr. Carrol's body vanishes.
Metal Man: "...But apparently he knew it was going to make him vanish anyway."
Deloth dashes over to Dark Master, Fire Twists him, then backflips and tries to catch Ganondorf in midair with another Twist!
Metal Man (GM): The Dark Master is hit repeatedly. He continues walking at the machine as if you did no damage.
Dragoshi: "What the hell..."
Dark Master: "You fools... I was behind this all along, and now you want to undo it? You could again live in the power of The Void!"
Valentine Kilmer: "Tsk. Metal Man. Any thoughts?"
Panzer sits at the controls and her fingers change into weird prongs, extending to plug into all available ports. She uploads a commandable version of the Maverick Virus to force a hostile take over and seizure of overriding control over the ship.
Dragoshi: "SCREW THE POWER OF THE VOID!"
Dark Master: "I cannot believe that even my second in command has turned on me. It doesn't matter, I am unstoppable!"
Metal Man (GM): He powers up and fires a massive cluster bolt which knocks aside Dragoshi and Deloth like paper dolls.
Metal Man: "I think I'll get us some backup riiiight now."
Metal Man calls to HQ. "Julian! Chancé! Any of you here?"
Deloth doesn't even have time to cry out as he gets smashed back about... what? 50 feet?
Dragoshi: *Sent flying ass over teakettle. Could I have an 'ow' with that?*
Metal Man: "We're under attack by some overpowered freak!"
Metal Man (GM): Panzer continues to slowly take over the ship... we'll come back to her when she has a way out.
Valentine Kilmer: "Do not stop attacking him, Questers. He has odds, but you can knock them down."
Metal Man walks into the way. "Val. Try something of your tricks on him. He's obviously immortal, but that doesn't mean he's unharmable."
Deloth then does a few bounces in the dirt and lands face-down. That's gotta hurt.
Machine: "Nearing completion."
Metal Man (GM): Ganondorf himself walks into the way of the Dark Master.
Ganondorf: "You shall not stop this. I may hate the Questers, but I refuse to let my attempts to fight them be diluted by your... nonsense."
Dark Master: "Your fate was sealed when you betrayed ME!!!"
Metal Man (GM): He fires more lightning at Ganondorf.
Valentine Kilmer: "Just so you know. Challenging near Demi-gods cost extra, Metal."
Deloth stumbles to his feet. Okay, that's broken, that's broken, that's broken too...
Metal Man (GM): Ganondorf fires his own dark sphere at him. The Dark Master is matched for a moment, but gaining power on Ganondorf.
Dragoshi: *Is feeling weak.*
Metal Man: "...Somebody help Ganondorf." *He shakes his head* "I can't believe I'd say that."
Ganondorf: "Urk... what is this... power? I have your book! I'm using it against you! A machine is destroying the hole you used for power!"
Valentine Kilmer: *She decides to use the unknown poison darts she made. Loading them into her rifle and shooting one at the Dark Master."
Deloth staggers back to the others. "I should have learned Cure before all this..."
Dark Master: "You do not understand. I am the ultimate power. The book was only a symbol! Now kneel, slave!" He fires more... but then some darts hit him in the side. "...You cannot delay me, mortal!" He turns to hit Val.
Dragoshi: "Huh? Oh. Sure. Let me just get out of the fucking pain i'm feeling right now!" *Hisses, as he pulls out the Phoenix Down, and consumes it, regaining all his HP AND A LIFE!* "Hey! You fucking cliche in a can! SHUT UP!" *Blasts at the Dark Master again with the assault rifle.*
Metal Man (GM): Ganondorf clocks him in the side of the face. He is unharmed, but distracted.
Machine: "88%..."
Dark Master: "You made your last mistake, Ganondorf."
Ganondorf: "I NEVER make mistakes, fool."
Metal Man (GM): The Dark Master punches Ganondorf so hard he flies into the beam and is thrown quite far away. He is shot by the rifle, but he acts like he was stung by a bee rather than bullets. The machine is still climbing. Ganondorf only momentarily interrupted it.
Dragoshi: "SERIOUSLY! It's quite grating listening to your incessant babbling! And, trust me. This is coming from a guy who's listened to a lot of it."
Deloth: "Less talk! More slashy-slashy!"
Valentine Kilmer: "...You will be stopped." *She shoot another dart at the Dark Master.*
Deloth whirls his sword and slashes once at Dark Master.
Dragoshi: *Mutters, and starts spewing acid in the face of this annoying Dark Master guy.*
Valentine Kilmer: "Attack him at all sides."
Metal Man (GM): The Dark Master is slashed. The cut heals instantly.
Digifanatic also decides to join in on the fun, but starts out conservatively--a Fire Punch followed by an Icy Kick...
Dark Master: "Cease your foolish attempts to stop me, or I will kill you permanently."
Metal Man (GM): The machine is slowing down. Apparently, it is harder the further it gets.
Deloth: *Slash again!*
Metal Man (GM): He is punched and kicked and slashed repeatedly. He seemingly has no damage from those.
Panzer listens to elevator music while taking over.
Metal Man (GM): He doesn't even attempt to dodge, his hatred is something fierce. Panzer on her way, but it's still a ways to go. Through a hole in reality cast in a past session.
Valentine Kilmer: "He's not immortal. He will tire soon."
Metal Man (GM): When the machine hits 100%, the reality is repaired, making the world a better place. The Dark Master wants to recreate The Void, or something similar to that effect. In other words, major jerk material.
Dark Master: "You asked for this."
Metal Man (GM): He holds out his hand and turns Deloth to stone.
Dark Master: "My power cannot be stopped!"
Julian: *And, for kicks, a warp portal opens up and Julian dashes out, bobbing and weaving rapidly to create constant side-to-side motion! Julian uses this motion to great effect, trying to land 4 consecutive low-hanging Gazelle Punches! Floyd Patterson would be proud.*
Metal Man (GM): Oddly, Dragoshi's Sword of Darkness is glowing. The machine is at 89%. The Dark Master steps a step further.
Digifanatic: .oO(How did he do that without any chance at missing? Dang it...)
Deloth: *...What is it with my characters getting petrified, anyways?*
Metal Man (GM): He is then violently punched in the face.
Dragoshi: *Glances at the Sword of Darkness* "It's glowing. And I do not like that at all. Why is it glowing."
Valentine Kilmer: "Good. Mr. Sawyer is here."
Metal Man (GM): His face must be made of steel. It gets a tiny dent.
Dark Master: "Why do you hit me, Sawyer? You have been made out to be a nobody just as I have! Join me, and you can rule the universe!"
Digifanatic knows it probably won't harm the DM that badly, but it's a light-based move, so hopefully, it might do something: Hyper Beam Matrix to Dark Master's chest.
Metal Man (GM): It glows as it nears completion.
Deloth: *Anybody have a spare Soft? ^_^;*
Valentine Kilmer: *Of course she's homing in on the Dark Master, seeking to snipe out his chest with a powerful shoot. Holding it until the right moment.*
Metal Man (GM): Dracula's voice echoes in your head, Dragoshi.
Dragoshi: *Oh god.*
Dracula: *To Dragoshi* "Kill him with the sword! I made it to kill him!"
Metal Man (GM): The laser hits the DM in the chest. He continues walking towards it. He's very close now.
Dragoshi: .oO(Ohhh...Thanks, Drac!) *And, suddenly, Dragoshi would put away the K7, and pull out...THE DARK SWORD!? WTF?!*
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man stands in the way and hits him over the head with the Deloth statue. It does little damage. About three feet.
Valentine Kilmer: *Val too joins in with a powerful shot.*
Dark Master: "You of all people should know. You wanted glory, so you joined me! Why did you abandon me for fools?"
Digifanatic: "Should we just stand in the way now?"
Metal Man: "Because they actually believed in me."
Digifanatic: "And hit him from there?"
Dark Master: "You of all people." *THNCK* He's hit. He gets a minor paper cut from that big a bullet.
Metal Man (GM): Dark Master's back is turned to Dragoshi.
Dark Master: "I shall just have to kill you like that idiot scientist."
Dragoshi: *He would then look at DM* "Hey, asshole! Stop talking! It's getting old!" *Suddenly, Dragoshi zooms over to the Dark Master, and suddenly goes in for a tri-cut, the first being a sideslash to the back, the second then being upwards slash, and the final one being a descending cleave.*
Metal Man: "You make one mistake." *Holds a hand* "In that time the machine will be completed."
Dark Master: "Not if I--"
Julian: *Julian seems to have thought this over for a bit.* "Hmm. Allow me to answer that, in the following way." *Julian reaches into his vest...and produces the SLEDGEHAMMER.* "On behalf of 357 Productions-" *Rears back* "Offer DECLINED." *SLAM!*
Valentine Kilmer: "Tsk."
Metal Man (GM): He turns around and senses the Sword of Darkness. It cuts him for real, only for the hammer to hit him in the head. He falls over, then stands up, with a dent and a slice. He laughs.
Digifanatic: .oO(Ah, been a while since I've seen the hammer...)
Dark Master: "No Deus Ex Machina can kill ME!"
Metal Man (GM): He fires a bolt of energy and disintegrates the dark sword.
Dracula's Voice in Dragoshi's head: "...I reaally didn't expect that."
Valentine Kilmer: "...Major."
Dragoshi: "...Meh. At least I scored a direct hit." *Spews acid into the wound* .oO(Ehhh...At least it wasn't anything dumb like, err...I'll get back to you on that)
Metal Man (GM): About now, Panzer's ship emerges from the Dark World. The machine is nearing completion. The Dark Master is in the way of the ship, however. (Ironically)
Dark Master: "Your work is in vain." He stops moving towards the machine. "It wasn't I who the book fated to stop the machine!!!"
Digifanatic continues to just go for various moves that can slow the DM down...he takes out a golf club, stands in between the machine and DM and proceeds to go with a battering ram forward smash with the club to DM's chest.
Metal Man: "..." *Shrugs* "I don't care." *Shoots the Dark Master several times, despite it not doing any damage.*
Panzer doesn't have time to recalibrate the virus to respond faster so ... It's going to plow into the DM. She gets her hands free and darts out of the ship and leaps off all reploid style, creating a slight crater as a fast-moving hunk of 2 tonnage falls into the earth.
Metal Man (GM): Digi misses, dramatically.
Digifanatic: *Dang it dang it dang it.*
Valentine Kilmer: "I'll stop you myself if I have to. Metal, hold your spot."
Machine: "93%..."
Metal Man (GM): The Dark Master looks up and sees the machine.
Dragoshi: "...Only 93?"
Julian: "I got no idea what the hell is goin' on, but I know you ain't 'sposed to be here." *Rears back...CANNON BLOW!*
Dragoshi: "What the christ."
Dark Master: "...It can't be... it's aim is... off!!!"
Valentine Kilmer: *She tries to use her platform not to damage him before to push the Dark Master back as far as she could.*
Metal Man (GM): Seconds after Julian hits the DM, the ship plows into the area where everyone else is. It misses the machine. The large explosion knocks everyone around.
Dragoshi: "Now you'll know how I felt when I had an entire fucking spaceship plow into m-" *OH NO, NOT AGAIN?* *plowed.
Digifanatic: *Wait, huh?*
Metal Man (GM): The Dark Master is knocked aside by it and the final attacks... he wasn't expecting for it to hit him. The Machine nonchalantly speaks.
Machine: "100% complete. Have a nice day."
Panzer climbs out of the crater, a good hundred yards away and brushes herself off. "Stupid... Fucking Mavericks." She lines up a shot for Metal's head, aiming patiently.
Metal Man (GM): *ZOOP* The wreckage vanishes, as does the machine... and the hole.
Digifanatic: "Panzer...I think you're the heroine in the end."
Metal Man (GM): However, the Dark Master's words were true. He gets up, still at full power. Just that his plans can't be fulfilled like he wanted them to.
Dark Master: "...A minor setback. My powers weren't made by that distortion. I may as well finish you off right now!"
Digifanatic: "Well, Part 1 is complete. The machine got to 100...now, then..."
Dark Master: "If I cannot destroy you by interdimensional annihilation... I shall kill you the old fashioned way."
Julian: "Anyone mind tellin' me who this guy IS?"
Panzer changes aim to the DM's head and fires.
Dragoshi: "Some schmuck who wanted to make a second Void or something dumb like that."
Metal Man (GM): Panzer would be dead-on... except one problem. The rifle somehow got bent during the altercation earlier. Panzer manages instead to blow up the rifle.
Panzer is burnt and huffs. Starts storming off.
Julian: "Why the fuck would anyone want to do that?"
Valentine Kilmer: "...There went our back up."
Dark Master: "Silence, idiots! Your time of death has come!"
Dragoshi: *Mutters as he pulls out his own assault rifle again, and does a pre-'true' (Or whatever) battle shot to the DM's face. Because yes.*
Metal Man (GM): He holds up his hands and gets into battle stance. You shoot him in the face... no damage. That'll have to be settled in a battle.
Metal Man: "I guess it's come down to the inevitable."
Dragoshi: "Yep..."
Digifanatic: "Yeah."
Julian: "Whatever."
Digifanatic: "Time to get down to business."
Valentine Kilmer: "Just have the check ready, Metal."
Metal Man gets up and dusts himself off. "We got lucky that first time. Time for the real test of skill."
Metal Man (GM): The Dark Prognosticus flew off with him.
Dragoshi: "Well, that has been one of the weirdest bouts of luck i've seen yet, then."
Metal Man (GM): etal Man chucks a Megavitamin at Deloth prior to the battle. He is un-statued.
Deloth: "I live!" *Just barely, though.*
Dark Master: "I will show you all what it feels like to be neglected, ignored, and beaten! You'll pay for what you've done... and I will personally harm all of you! Ha ha ha ha ha!"
Metal Man (GM): He starts off battle by tripping on a rock.
Dark Master: "Gah! I'll get you too, rocks!"
Deloth: "...Intimidating."
Dragoshi: "...That was pathetic."
Julian: *Thumbs down.*
Valentine Kilmer: "Throw more rocks on the battlefield."
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man starts off by firing repeatedly at the Dark Master. The Dark Master dodges it.
Dark Master: "I cannot be harmed by your puny techniques. I am superior!"
Julian: *Alright...That defense's going to have to come down a bit. Julian moves in and attacks with a rib-shattering Liver Blow!*
Metal Man (GM): His stupidly good luck defeats the punch.
Digifanatic: .oO(Come on...land one of those...)
Julian: *And now the other hand!*
Metal Man (GM): You hit him. He stands there and takes no damage.
Dark Master: "I am immune to your attacks. I know more than anyone else what to defend against... you Questers always attack!"
Metal Man (GM): Some strange field protected him from that.
Valentine Kilmer: "Use his weakness."
Julian: *We got any rocks?*
Dragoshi: "I don't think he's weak to rocks. I just think he was too busy being idiot to notice that he was about to trip over one."
Digifanatic: *whispering to Dragoshi* "Think we should scan?"
Metal Man (GM): Rocks are everywhere.
Dragoshi: *Whisper* "Well, you do that. I bet it'd be a waste of time."
Metal Man (GM): Small rocks. Big rocks. Ugly rocks.
Digifanatic: *w* "Then I won't."
Valentine Kilmer: "If anything, it will distract him as I try to figure out his protection."
Julian: *Eh. Screw that noise. Julian backs up to the group, rubbing his left hand.*
Digifanatic decides to toss one rock at the DM, just as an experiment.
Metal Man (GM): He is hit in the head and takes 1 damage.
Dark Master: "Ow! You can't beat me with that! Stop trying!"
Digifanatic: *exhales deeply and holds for now.*
Valentine Kilmer: "From the sounds of it, it hurt him."
Metal Man: "Indeed. His field's power must not be perfect."
Deloth starts charging up a Wing Slam...
Valentine Kilmer: "Do you have a powerful Item I can borrow, Metal Man? A field test if you would."
Metal Man: "Unfortunately, no. All I have is the Star Board... but I'm still charging it up."
Dragoshi: *Anyway, Dragoshi picks up a rock, and, uh, tries to throw it into the Dark Master's mouth or something. Or just peg him in the eye with it if his mouth isn't open.*
Metal Man (GM): He is hit.
Dark Master: "Hah. You'd have to throw hundreds of those to kill me!"
Valentine Kilmer: "Looks like I'll have to use my last one then." *She load up her last poison dart, testing to see if something will react as she aims at the Dark Master and fires it him.*
Metal Man (GM): Val chucks it in the dirt.
Valentine Kilmer: "...Never was good at sports."
Dragoshi: "...At least it isn't frozen, sharp shamrocks." *Mumbles and throws another rock at the DM, making sure to aim at his mouth when it's open while he speaks. Unless, he's like, a quick speaker or something, then Drago just hurls it at his eye again.*
Metal Man (GM): He's hit again, but not in the mouth. The field around him doesn't like all those rocks hitting him.
Valentine Kilmer: *She then decides to study the shield using what she knows to see if she can understand it more.*
Dragoshi: *Oh, and for the sake of repetition, how 'bout I try and do the same as before with a third rock before calling this a tern?*
Metal Man (GM): You can tell it is made of a strange energy wave. It seems counter to the wavelength a Quester attack makes. The rocks, not being of the same energy, pass through it like it isn't there. And that appears to be damaging it. He dodges this rock.
Valentine Kilmer: "...Metal Man. We need Non-Questers. I need everyone to give me what items they have. I have a plan."
Metal Man: "Hm. I shall call for them then... but it'll take a little bit."
Valentine Kilmer: "Let's do what we can until then."
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man radios for help. Strangely, Ganondorf picks up.
Ganondorf: (Dex) "I will be" *cough cough* "Coming immediately, then, as I can probably destroy the field. Until then... it's all you."
Digifanatic: "Ganondorf...ohh man..."
Valentine Kilmer: "Use normal attack until then."
Deloth tosses his two grenades to Val, canceling out of his charge to do so.
Metal Man: "I shall wait until then... if it neutralizes Quester attacks, I can't harm it either."
Metal Man (GM): The Dark Master laughs.
Valentine Kilmer: "If needed. Use a weapon or item. Even pick up a rock to hit him with."
Dark Master: "You won't be alive for that long! Take this!"
Metal Man (GM): He holds out his hands and fires cluster lightning at everyone! Metal is zapped.
Digifanatic knows it'll take a miracle to dodge this, but tries to roll out of the way nonetheless.
Deloth: *Say, something smells appetizing--oh, wait.*
Valentine Kilmer: *She's hit as well, letting out a gasping breath. it kind of hurt her.*
Julian: *Too fast!*
Metal Man (GM): The Dark Master than turns to Val.
Dark Master: "It is you who have been trying to stop me the most. Not any more! Die!"
Metal Man (GM): He fires a gigantic bolt of lightning at Val.
Valentine Kilmer: "Hmph..."
Metal Man (GM): Val is blasted.
Dark Master: "Defy me again and you shall be killed in a horrible fashion."
Metal Man (GM): Julian et Digi's turns!
Valentine Kilmer: *And that did her in. She falls off of her platform and flops onto the Ground.* "Major... I couldn't..."
Dark Master: "Mwa ha ha ha ha!"
Digifanatic decides trying to lob a Grenade at the DM for a change. Hey, after all, it's not a Quester move.
Digifanatic: *B-B-B-BOOM!*
Dark Master: "...Agh!" *BOOM*
Metal Man: "This is getting bad... he's taking people out left and right."
Digifanatic: "I'm taking requests for the giveaway of one Mushroom for now. First request gets it."
Metal Man: "No Mushroom for me. I can take more beating."
Dragoshi: "Same."
Digifanatic: "Alright...anyone else? "
Metal Man: "Somebody should heal Val. Unless she has some spare lives. I wouldn't want to have to rely on Ganondorf's kindness alone..."
Julian: *Julian, having no grenades, passes.*
Digifanatic: "She's probably got a spare or two. She's down, man. She's down..." *Keeps the Shroom for now.*
Dark Master: "Give up. You can't have enough grenades to kill me."
Dragoshi: *So, anyway. Did you hear the one about the Dragoshi with the Holy Cross? No? Well, anyway, he walks up to the Dark Master and starts stabbing the fuck out of him with it.*
Metal Man (GM): He gets stabbed in the face, then dodges the other two.
Dark Master: "As much as you may wish I was weak to holy, that won't happen. I have learned from The Void's mistakes!"
Dragoshi: "The Void wasn't weak to holy."
Metal Man (GM): He laughs and fires yet another energy wave at all of you.
Dragoshi: "He was more so weak to-Oh, screw it."
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man leaps over it.
Dragoshi: *As does Dragoshi.*
Digifanatic tries to duck under it...
Digifanatic: *Can't dodge for krizzap.*
Metal Man (GM): Julian leaps on over it.
Digifanatic: "I'll be alright, folks. We're still doing alright."
Metal Man (GM): The Dark Master powers up and fires a giant bit of lightning at Dragoshi. Dragoshi is blasted back. Man, this guy's on a roll.
Dragoshi: *Still alive.* "I've taken worse."
Digifanatic: "Dragoshi, you want that Shroom now?"
Dark Master: "I shall blast you to pieces... and all without even touching my true powers!"
Dragoshi: "Metal's Deathmachine for inst-Oh, sure, why not."
Metal Man: "Support's coming in real soon. Thank goodness. My Deathmachine is a Quester attack. Sorry Dragoshi."
Digifanatic: "Alright." *He gives Dragoshi a Mushroom and then uses another of those golf club jab smashes on the Dark Master. He knows it's not going to do much, if at all, but pay attention afterwards.*
Dragoshi: "I know, Metal. I was referring to how it was more painful getting hit by that than the lightning. :/"
Digifanatic: *Puts himself in a great position right after backup comes...*
Dragoshi: "In any case." *Dragoshi eats two more shrooms, then pulls out an airtank and tries to whomp the Dark Master in the head with it.*
Metal Man (GM): He is bonked. The air tank gets a dent but isn't broken.
Dark Master: "Ow! I really should have made a ward against items when I was casting this shield..."
Metal Man (GM): Val is revived. Ironically, right before the Backup arrives.
Valentine Kilmer: "...Why am I alive?" *She saids as she stands up.*
Metal Man: "The magic of the Questers gives all who stay with them the ability to revive."
Julian: "You'd rather be dead?""
Valentine Kilmer: "But I'm not a Quester."
Metal Man: "You must have stayed near us a lot, as it doesn't rub off on just anybody. It also occurs with Smashers, who are not Questers either. Some Smashers even had it prior to the tournament. I have yet to know how it works."
Valentine Kilmer: "Very well. I will accept this for now." *She hops back onto her platform.* "Ganondorf was defeated before. it may be best to cal in another one, Metal."
Metal Man: "Ganondorf said he had some help with him. He himself sounded scared. Which is unusual. Usually he's manipulating everybody. This is clearly beyond his little Triforce game mentality."
Valentine Kilmer: "Very well." *She then poofs as a plush version of herself appears on the platform.*
Metal Man: "I've contacted the Smashers too... ...interesting."
Dragoshi: "..." *Blinks.*
Digifanatic: .oO(Chancé better not see one of those.)
Julian: "'Spose that's one way of not getting hit."
Metal Man (GM): Backup arrives in the form of Ganondorf, Samus, and Panzer... with a new Ganondorf-created rifle.
Dark Master: "What is the meaning of this? They can't stop me!"
Ganondorf: "We are not true Questers. You cannot block our attacks. The destruction of your little toy hole has made you weak enough for me to damage you."
Samus: *Silently raises cannon.*
Panzer simply looks very... Very annoyed.
Dark Master: "Pffft. Do your worst!"
Julian: *Gets out an Electric Torch.*
Ganondorf: "I'd rather do my best. Now... let's show this joker true power."
Metal Man (GM): Ganondorf powers up and fires a Gerudo Punch at the Dark Master's field. The field is blasted by the power... it still stands. Dented, however... And erratic.
Julian: *Procedes to smack DM upside the head with it.*
Panzer is letting everyone attack ahead of her o.o.
Metal Man (GM): The electric torch hits DM and the field. His attempt to block it with a hand failed. DM is unable to defend any further, or even attack. Samus shoots the field with a Super Missile she had charged up.
Julian: "Shut yo' damn mouth." *Hell if I know. What's the formula for hitting someone with a flashlight?*
Metal Man (GM): *BLAM.* The field's very nearly broken.
Metal Man: "Hmmm..."
Metal Man (GM): Metal picks up Deloth and attacks the DM with him. He is slammed on the head by Deloth.
Valentine Kilmer: "Metal. They may be dumb, but don't use your dead questers as weapons." *The doll appears to be talking, though motionless.*
Metal Man: "But Deloth would like to be known as the guy who has the power to defeat barriers!"
Dragoshi: "...No. Keep using him like that. It's freaking hilarious."
Panzer levels the new rifle at DM's head and fires a shot to try and blow his brains out through his opposite ear. Yummy.
Metal Man (GM): He just barely fails to block it. The barrier explodes and changes. New stuff happens... very odd stuff. The Dark Master glows dark red, his eyes flaring up. He holds out a hand as if to lightning all of you. The field crackles and burns. It begins to burn his very darkness away.
Dark Master: "Nooo! Dark Prognosticus! You said I would destroy the Questers and rule the universe!"
Dragoshi: "I wonder if you've ever considered that the book is playing you for a fool..."
Metal Man (GM): The burning continues. The book even speaks... sort of.
Julian: "Figures. All talk, no walk."
Digifanatic: "Wow...a prophecy is wrong?"
Metal Man (GM): Ganondorf flips it open and displays it to the Dark Master. 'THE RULER OF THE UNIVERSE MUST NOT FALTER BEFORE PETTY OPPOSITION'
Panzer leans on her rifle. "Heeeeeey... Does the book know where Zero is?"
Ganondorf: "Yes. I shall show you after we deal with this freak of nature."
Panzer does a mini-jig. Stops before anyone catches it.
Dark Master: "What? That wasn't petty! I... the Dark Master... am unbeatable!"
Metal Man (GM): He walks again. The same rock trips him.
Dragoshi: "You're a fucking loony is what you are."
Metal Man (GM): All the mysterious outfit stuff falls out. It reveals... ...LUIGI?!?!?!?!?!?!
Julian: "..."
Dragoshi: "..."
Panzer: "..."
Julian: "Did NOT see this coming."
Valentine Kilmer: "I told you so."
Luigi: "Nooo! My disguise and my plans blasted to pieces! I was so close to finally overcoming Mario!"
Dragoshi: "Yea. Totally didn't see it coming either."
Panzer: "Hey... Aren't you that guy that... Oooooh. I get it."
Metal Man (GM): He gets up, now even angrier, and still with enough power to fight.
Luigi: "For all this time I've served as number two, ignored by Questers... Mario... ...even other villains!"
Digifanatic: "WHAT...THE..."
Panzer: "So. Can I blow his head off now?"
Ganondorf: "Let him finish making a fool out of himself."
Panzer: "Dammit." *charges rifle.*
Dragoshi: "'K."
Valentine Kilmer: "Metal Man. I think you know what to do."
Luigi: "For once, I thought somebody liked me... and it turned out the Book simply wanted to use me? I won't take this! You're all going to lose to me! Luigi! And I'll be famous for it! Ahaahahahahahahahahaaaaaa!!!!"
Panzer: "Maybe we could put him in a little cage and hook a chain to my tank and pull him around a while."
Metal Man: "I think he's totally lost it. Let's beat him until he finds his mind."
Ganondorf: "What's thi--"
Julian: "Sounds like my kind of plan." *DRAMATIC PUNCH FIST INTO PALM.*
Metal Man (GM): Luigi powers up and fires a beam which blasts Ganondorf and Samus away.
Panzer blinks.
Dragoshi: "...Okay, what the damn."
Panzer: "Luigi is on crack?"
Valentine Kilmer: "No. It's his backup plan."
Luigi: "No Smashers shall interfere in THIS battle! If you really think I'm so worthless... fight me yourselves, Questers and Quester-wannabes! The great Luigi shall take you all on! L is real 2041!"
Digifanatic: "It seems more like something Waluigi would do."
Metal Man (GM): He glows and then gets into battle stance again.
Julian: "God, shut UP."
Panzer: "I'd never want to be a Quester, thanks."
Metal Man: "Waluigi was less chatty and more psychopathic."
Julian: *Puts away the electric torch.*
Valentine Kilmer: "I'm fine with Serving Dr. Robotnik as well."
Dragoshi: *Rolls eyes, and looks on in semi-confusion at Luigi of all people. Freakin' Luigi.*
Metal Man (GM): He's now vulnerable to any attack. He's just Luigi, but so insanely angry that he'll probably take repeated beating to knock down. This plot twist brought to you by: Nick Caligo.
Dragoshi: *So...Uhh...Yea. Can't think of anything witty, so I'll just blast Luigi in the face with a double blast. Yea. Wow.*
Metal Man: "So the truth comes out... ...Luigi kidnapped himself. What the heck." *Shakes his head.*
Dragoshi: "..." *Also shakes his head.*
Julian: "Whatever. Let's just beat his sense back into 'em."
Metal Man (GM): He dodges the second, but is hit by the first.
Digifanatic thinks it's once again time to go for an old Fire/Ice one-two. You know the drill!
Luigi: "You think you can beat me? I had to hide my powers so I wouldn't burn up my disguise! Now you're all gonna pay! Aiieeeee!!!"
Panzer would be getting to a good, semi far away sniping position while charging if possible.
Metal Man (GM): He's punched in the face... And kicked in the face too. Panzer: You do so while charging.
Digifanatic: "Go get him, Panz."
Metal Man (GM): Panzer's charged shot is ready. Luigi has no force fields to protect him and is standing right there.
Panzer tries to blow his head clean off his shoulders.
Metal Man (GM): He's pretty dumb as far as evading sniper fire is. Panzer's bad aim succeeds. For he is the Luigi man, standing perfectly still. It's not a headshot though. More like a footshot.
Luigi: "Owowowowowowow!!!"
Panzer curses and charges again, 3 more turns.
Metal Man (GM): Mr. Come-from-behind death who was actually Luigi is wide open.
Julian: *That defense is entirely too high, so it's coming down. Julian moves in for a rib-shattering Liver Blow! Maybe the 1st try is the charm this time.*
Metal Man (GM): He is just barely hit. Barely barely barely. It's nice to be able to use that word.
Gujin_Hisaki: *CRUNCH!*
Julian: *Then Julian backs up and charges again, trying to knock Luigi's block off two consecutive low-hanging hooks! Gazelle Punch Duo!*
Metal Man (GM): He is hit by both.
Luigi: "How dare you harm the Great Luigi? The Great Luigi will destroy you!!!"
Julian: *Julian backward jobs back to the group, throwing a few phantom punches to finish warming up* "Bring it on, tiny dancer."
Metal Man: "I begin to wonder if I'm actually sane by comparison to him." *Still wielding Deloth as a weapon.*
Luigi: "Ayayeiayeiaeyaiaaiaiaahhhhh!!!"
Panzer: "You're not."
Metal Man (GM): He runs at Julian and begins flailing like a maniac. Who's had a bit too much acid.
Dragoshi: "I'd say that'd be the case, Metal."
Metal Man (GM): He flies into Julian, hitting him 5 times for whopping damage. Apparently, his wrath is powerful enough to make him still a big threat.
Panzer: "Fucking crack head."
Digifanatic: "I'd say so..."
Metal Man (GM): And following up his insane barrage, he attempts to burn Julian to death with an insanely firery blast from his right hand.
Metal Man: "I've never seen that much fire come out of a human hand before."
Panzer: "He's not human. "
Metal Man: "I guess not."
Dragoshi: "Pretty much, Yea."
Metal Man (GM): Julian leaps out of the way.
Panzer: "He's just some tripped out kid jealous of his big brother."
Julian: *Julian's too fast for ya! This time!*
Metal Man (GM): A massive explosion takes out the area where he was. He turns around and begins madly firing exploding green fireballs everywhere.
Dragoshi: "...With insanely overpowered fireballs."
Luigi: "Dieeeeee!!!!!"
Metal Man: "Hey! That's my line!"
Metal Man (GM): Threatens all. Metal Man ducks.
Panzer is probably out of range <<;
Metal Man (GM): Panzer is out of range, actually.
Julian: *Fire in the disco!*
Metal Man: "This is going to cost a lot to clean up."
Digifanatic: *ON FLAMES D00D.*
Panzer: "Nothing a huge pile of dirt covering it can't fix."
Metal Man: "Dead scientist blood, Trent blood, Dark Sword pieces, Ganondorf, machine bits, no longer radioactive uranium bits..."
Panzer: "Don't forget Samus."
Dragoshi: "...Could I at least have the sword pieces? ...if there's enough to possibly put it back together" >_>
Metal Man: "Yes. Her ship bits are everywhere."
Panzer: "I hope it never gets put back together."
Metal Man (GM): Everybody else dodged, seemingly.
Digifanatic: *Sans moi.*
Julian: "The Foundation'll take care of it. Don't worry."
Metal Man: "All right... pardon me for the mess this will make, but this is drastic measure time."
Panzer: "We should still just pile it up in dirt. Dirt solves everything."
Metal Man (GM): *Deathmachine appear* "Eat exploding toys, freak!"
Dragoshi: "Oh, this oughtta be good."
Metal Man (GM): 8 projectiles...
Panzer calls Mario. "Dude. Come change your little brother's diaper so he'd stop being so fucking cranky. KTHX."
Metal Man (GM): Wolf's mega-milk, a statue of Kairah Mardeneigh, Wolf's mega-milk again, Southern Cross (the move Indalaceo did with deadly star stuff), the Skeleton King's right hand, A hologram of Denon riding a Boss Bass, and two flaming floppy drives.
Digifanatic can't help but smile at Panzer's comment. So true, fellow Quester. Soooo true.
Metal Man (GM): Luigi would kill Panzer. But so much exploding garbage is flying at him he's preoccupied.
Panzer isn't a Quester, Digi. She moves farther out of range, retaining charge.
Metal Man (GM): Luigi sits there and is blown up by a wall of garbage.
Dragoshi: *Looks at half the crap that's flying at Luigi* "..." *Blinks at the Kairah statue and the hologram of Denon riding a Boss Bass.*
Metal Man (GM): He's on fire from that... ..but he doesn't know when to give up. He stands up and acts like he didn't take any damage at all.
Luigi: "Not even exploding garbage shall stop the Great Luigi!"
Julian: *Julian really isn't surprised by anything Metal does at this point.*
Panzer: "Wolf has milk..." *snigger* Has he been lactating?"
Mario: (Dex) "Mama-mia! I'mma coming!"
Dragoshi: *...Facepalms, half-snickering.*
Metal Man: "No. He made the chocolate milk with cow's milk ages ago to help the Questers. It is now spoiled and highly explosive. Sort of like jet fuel."
Panzer is silent a moment, then bursts out laughing. "WOLF LACTATES!"
Metal Man: "It's times like this which remind me why I'm not Wolfman."
Luigi: "Hey! Wolf-a-man is meaningless! Pay more attention to me!"
Panzer: "Metal, Mario is coming."
Digifanatic hopes that 6-to-5 in his favor is enough to go for a Hyper Beam Matrix to Luigi's head.
Panzer: "Luigi, you're not interesting. You can't lactate."
Digifanatic: *Hoo boy.*
Metal Man: "Good. Let's hope Luigi doesn't have an atomic bomb stuck in his hat first."
Panzer wonders if she could trick him into trying, though...
Metal Man (GM): Luigi is failing hard now, as he gets lasered.
Digifanatic does a very modest fist pump upon success...
Dragoshi: "Yea. Then again, with half the shit that's happened so far, it wouldn't surprise me." *So, anyway, Luigi receives TWO FREE ASSAULT RIFLE BLASTS for being so fucking crazy.*
Metal Man (GM): Luigi has the luck of the Eggmanish. Luigi wishes he was dead. :p Hit, hit. Dis_Aster.
Luigi: "I'll take you out like those people in the video game! Banzaiiii!!!"
Metal Man (GM): He leaps at Digi and does a spinning mid-air kick like from Street Fighter.
Digifanatic: *The best he can do is tie that...gulp.*
Metal Man: "...He's a quick learner, though."
Metal Man (GM): 6 kicks hit Digi in the face.
Digifanatic: *And down he goes.*
Dragoshi: "..."
Luigi: "Think you're tough? I learned the secrets of Missingno! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!"
Digifanatic: "I should have healed...* *collapse.*
Metal Man (GM): He leaps up and flies at Dragoshi like a bird. And shoots a water gun at him... two water guns... from his hands.
Dragoshi: *Okaaay...*
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi: It is times at this when you wonder if Luigi is crazier than The Void, as you take damage. He then finishes off by picking up a giant boulder and hurling it at Julian.
Luigi: "Punch THIS!!!"
Metal Man (GM): His aim leaves much to be desired.
Gujin_Hisaki: *KA-POW.*
Metal Man (GM): It flies back at Luigi and hits him in the face.
Luigi: "Ow!!!!!"
Julian: *Flex.*
Dragoshi: "..." *Laughs.*
Metal Man: "His rage seems to limit his ability to think."
Julian: *Julian then rears back and dashes forward, channeling pure concussive force into his right fist! Julian reaches Luigi and fires off his patnented CANNON BLOW Haymaker!*
Metal Man (GM): He's hit by it head-on.
Digifanatic: *Now that's some serious boom. But it needs more cowbell.*
Metal Man (GM): You hear a ding. A weird circle drops onto the ground. Odd.
Dragoshi: "..." *Eyebrow raise.*
Julian: *?*
Metal Man (GM): Perhaps you hit Pi.
Panzer: "Geddit!"
Luigi: "Hah! Your circle of doom shall not stop me!"
Panzer: "Someone poke it."
Metal Man: "But it isn't ours. It dropped out of the sky."
Panzer: "POKE IT!"
Luigi: "Your tricks won't fool me!"
Metal Man (GM): *Sigh.*
Dragoshi: *Groan.*
Panzer: "PPPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Metal Man: "I would if I could."
Panzer fires at Luigi's head. >>;
Luigi: "I can't be fooled by robots!"
Metal Man: "But you can be shot by them."
Panzer: "I'm not a robot, fag-hag."
Metal Man (GM): Panzer hits him closer this time. In the shoulder.
Panzer chargie chargie.
Metal Man (GM): Luigi decides to attack this time with... ...a Martini glass... which he attempts to stab Digi with.
Metal Man: "Will he ever run out of weird attacks?"
Digifanatic: *Guess what? He's dead. Luigi just wasted an attack!*
Metal Man (GM): Luigi violently stabs Digi's corpse.
Panzer: "My God he's a menace with his randomness." *calls Mario again.* "Come subdue him before I blow his head off."
Luigi: "Wait a minute... he's dead! D'oh!"
Dragoshi: .oO(Luigi, you 9.) *Still facepalming.*
Panzer laughs, tells Mario Luigi just stabbed a dead Digi with a martini glass.
Metal Man (GM): He attacks again, this time trying to hit Julian with a really big book. The book is labeled 'Super Luigi 64--by Luigi'
Panzer: "Next he'll give you a papercut OF DOOM with a fake prescription.
Mario: *Dex* "Mama-mia! He's a really lost it! I'm running as fast as I can!"
Julian: *Julian weaves under the book attack, keeping an eye on that odd circle...*
Panzer scans the horizon for Mario with her scope.
Metal Man (GM): You see Mario slowly running up the hill.
Panzer: "Why didn't you just warp?" *to Mario.*
Mario: *Dex* "Because-a I need-a the exercise!"
Metal Man (GM): Luigi lights his hat on fire and tries to headbutt Dragoshi.
Panzer: "I can tell." *dark chuckle.* "He got a particular weakness?"
Dragoshi: "...That actually makes sense." *Headbutt'd.*
Mario: *Dex* "Whenever-a somebody mentions my-a adventures, he acts-a dumb!" *Dex* "And he's-a afraid of ghosts!"
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi is burned and branded with the L symbol for 20 damage. Digi is dead. Metal Man takes out his AK-47s and shoots at Luigi.
Panzer: "Mmkay." *to Luigi.* "Hey-a Luigi, remember that time when Mario saved Peach from Lemmy Koopa?"
Luigi: "What? He's a the star again? AIeairahwoohooaaaa!!!!" He starts freaking out.
Metal Man (GM): Just in time to be nailed by machinegun bullets.
Panzer: "Yeah. I was talking to Peach about it. She really likes him... Never mentions you though."
Metal Man: "I think he's nearly done for. Julian, you punch him a couple more times. Mario should be able to kick him out or something."
Luigi: "Agh! Mario needs to be-a destroyed!" Now he's speaking gibberish.
Julian: "With pleasure." *Julian dashes over to Luigi* "C'mere." *And attempts to grab him by the shirt collar!*
Panzer: "She likes him better because he's the exact. Opposite. Of. You."
Metal Man (GM): Luigi tries to make a rebuttal, but instead he runs directly face-first into Julian's attack. He simultaneously lights himself on fire, taking more damage.
Panzer is enjoying this.
Dragoshi: "...Heh."
Metal Man (GM): Apparently, the most fearsome enemy you've faced in a long time also possesses the ability to defeat himself... repeatedly.
Julian: *Grab...LEAP! Air Sawyer takes off with flaming Luigi in tow! Reaching the top of his jump, Julian rides Luigi back down to the ground and SLAMS him into it! And then...he does it again :O*
Panzer: "You know what else she said? She said she was glad you sucked so bad at rescuing. She couldn't stand being touched by you, and your nasty breath... And that mustache!"
Metal Man (GM): But not alright enough to defend against that.
Digifanatic: *Luigi got Posterized!* *Or not.*
Julian: *LEAP...SLAM DUNK! It must be the shoes!*
Digifanatic: *Or so.*
Metal Man (GM): It'll take a little damage off... ...but that's not good enough.
Dragoshi: "And she hates the color green. It reminds her of vomit."
Metal Man (GM): Luigi stops talking, for he has become totally controlled by rage.
Julian: *Julian backs up a little bit after slamming Luigi into the ground a second time, seeing if he's still with us or not..*
Panzer looks at Drag... "You can't mess with humans. You're one of them, fag hag."
Metal Man (GM): If Trance hadn't been destroyed he'd be in that mode.
Dragoshi: *...Wow, Panz must be fucking blind or something. Dragoshi isn't a human. >_>*
Metal Man (GM): Luigi is still furious and ready to Hadouken somebody. Maybe you should get him arrested for copyright infringement.
Panzer: "I even heard Bowser talking once. He says he doesn't want to fight you because a drunken irishman is more of a fight, even when he's unconcious."
Metal Man (GM): Mario is within range, so it's up to Dragoshi and Panzer to do some defeating blows.
Dragoshi: "Well, that's no fun." *Anyway, Dragoshi, now bored of just blasting the nigh-unholy crap out of Luigi decides to charge over to him, and prepare to grab him...*
Metal Man (GM): Hit.
Dragoshi: *Dragoshi then grabs Luigi by the neck, and starts strangling him, then smashing him into the ground three times. In any case, Dragoshi decides repeat this deadly grab again, because he's not done with him* "You do not break my fucking weapons!" *And, so what will happen to Luigi in this attempted grab?*
Metal Man (GM): Luigi is grabbed. He then is beaten into Deloth. Luigi is defeated by Deloth's corpse.
Panzer: "Dammit. I had a charged shot and everything."
Luigi: "Ahahahahaaaa!!!" He falls over.
Dragoshi: *Dragoshi pretty much slams Luigi into Del, yelling in rage with the tune of each slam.*
Panzer goes to shoot Luigi anyway o.o.
Metal Man (GM): Panzer shoots. A man in a top hat and a coat comes out of a portal.
???: "You have all played directly into my pla--"
Metal Man (GM): He is shot in the head and dies atop Luigi.
Julian: "'Bout time he went do-..."
Dragoshi: *Drops Luigi, then holds up Del's corpse* "And, the winner, by knockout is Del's cor-...what the fuck."
Metal Man: "I'm not going to ask what that was all about."
Julian: "That never happened."
Panzer blinks and looks at the guy. o.o; "That was cool." *walks over.*
Julian: "Got it?"
Dragoshi: *Decides to take off tophat guy's hat and coat to see who he was, if he'd even be familiar.*
Panzer looks for some sort of ID.
Digifanatic: *revives* "Well, it's about time I got put back to reality--what happened here?"
Dragoshi: "I smashed Luigi into Del."
Metal Man (GM): Some weird other-worldly guy. White top hat... crazy monocle... gigantic speech saying how he, Count Blech, would now destroy the world... he was too dumb to check for bullets when opening the portal though. Mario comes up and sees the dead guy and Luigi.
Mario: "Mama-mia! Luigi did it this time!"
Panzer looks at Mario. "Insulting him worked."
Dragoshi: *Checks to see if Luigi's KO'd body has any valuables on it. >_>*
Metal Man (GM): He picks up Luigi. Metal Man whistles and kicks Blech's body down the other side of the hill. "Never happened. Right." Dragoshi has gained: Count Blech's top hat!
Panzer snags the monocle. Wears it.
Metal Man (GM): ...Too bad it does virtually nothing. Panzer has gained: Count Blech's Monocle! It makes you look rich and snooty.
Dragoshi: "Yea. Totally never happened even though if it was awesome when Panz-Oh, you get the point."
Digifanatic: "Well, now what, heh?"
Panzer does a jig.
Metal Man (GM): Luigi wakes up, his eyes now blue.
Dragoshi: "Still, though. It never happened. Right." *Puts the tophat away for later. And continu-Oh, nevermind. Luigi's normal again now.*
Luigi: "Uuuugh... I have a big headache... wait a minute... ...I was so close to winning... but in the end... I lost because I wasn't truly evil."
Panzer jabs the barrel into Luigi's right eye in a threatening, non-harmful to eye sort of way.
Panzer: "I hate you. "Can I kill him now?"
Luigi: "Gack! The evil robot I took a Fire Flower from!" He passes out.
Mario: "No. He's-a mine to punish!"
Panzer's eye twitches.
Dragoshi: "...No. As mind-numbingly idiotic as this was, it's best to let-...Yea, that."
Metal Man (GM): Mario picks up Luigi out of harm's way and begins walking down the hill.
Panzer: "I AM NOT A ROBOT! I AM A REPLOID!"
Panzer shoulders the rifle.
Mario: "No more cartoon Sundays for you, bro! Or alcoholic beverages! Or talking to insane men who offer you candy!"
Metal Man (GM): Ganondorf walks up the hill.
Panzer: "I want candy."
Digifanatic: .oO(Or hallucinogenic drugs.)
Ganondorf: "Now... that we've cleared that up..."
Dragoshi: "And I want headache meds." e_e.
Julian: "An' that's taken care of..."
Ganondorf: "Let me finish what I was going to say... and do."
Metal Man (GM): He opens the book.
Ganondorf: "Zero is in a junk yard in your home realm, Panzer. A well known junk yard."
Panzer lifts a brow. "Morph Moth?"
Ganondorf: "That would be the one."
Panzer sighs. "That's where they fucking threw me. How can I get to him?"
Ganondorf: "He's probably stuck to something, or something else..." He dusts off the book. "It's rarely clearer than this." He points at Quester HQ. "Their warp system. Additionally... I can now conclude my grudge against the Questers in a proper format... in that upcoming tournament."
Metal Man (GM): He closes the book.
Panzer nods. "Kay. Thanks for the rifle. I need to get him out of there soon, and find and rebuild my Commander..."
Digifanatic: "So...it's kinda over?"
Ganondorf: "The book and Luigi wanted me to kill you the unfair way, but that would not be worth it."
Panzer starts running fown the hill.
Julian: "'Till then."
Ganondorf: "I would rather beat you in a tournament battle."
Digifanatic: "No end of the world for now?"
Ganondorf: "As for this cursed book..."
Dragoshi: "Quite. It makes things a lot less stressful."
Ganondorf: "I condemn it back to that fake realm it generated."
Panzer: "... I want the book!"
Dragoshi: "And, I really don't need anymore fucking stress after half of everything that's happened today."
Ganondorf: "You cannot have the book. Because it doesn't talk to reploids. It talks to warlocks, mages, and crazy green men."
Panzer: "I can make it talk. You threaten a book with fire and it does anything."
Julian: "An' you fall under all three."
Ganondorf: "This book... cannot be burned."
Metal Man (GM): He tries to burn it. It doesn't take a single piece of damage.
Panzer: "I'll blast it then." *starts aiming rifle.*
Ganondorf: "This book... cannot be bent or folded."
Metal Man (GM): He tries to step on it. Nothing.
Dragoshi: "Not even have it's pages ripped out?"
Metal Man (GM): He holds it out for you to shoot.
Ganondorf: "It's cursed. You can hit it over and over again. It won't go away."
Dragoshi: "Damn. That's some nasty cursage."
Panzer shoots it.
Ganondorf: "The only safe way is to send it to nowhere."
Metal Man (GM): The bullet bounces off of it.
Julian: "So get with the sendin'."
Ganondorf: "I even tried feeding it to a black hole. It came out of the hole."
Panzer: o.o; "That is fucking gay. Get rid of it."
Dragoshi: "Sheesh. Does that mean it'd survive one the sun, then?" *on.
Ganondorf: "So... I shall get rid of it the best I can. Foul book! Go forth to your home realm and never return!"
Panzer: "It... Doesn't happen to say that I take over my realm?"
Metal Man (GM): He shoots it with purple lightning and it vanishes into the portal.
Panzer frowns.
Ganondorf: "I read of your realm... it told me I can't tell you that. Otherwise it might prevent something like that from coming to pass. Causal... loop, it said. I defeated Luigi by telling him he was unstoppable, after all."
Digifanatic: *small scoff* "Oh, those silly things."
Panzer: "My realm is nothing but chaos, no one rules for long. A few months then anarchy breaks out."
Ganondorf: "Now... let us retire from this burnt crater land."
Dragoshi: "Agreed."
Panzer: "I miss my realm. Chaos is a sweet sound."
Metal Man: "I'll be sure to bury the mess under some dirt."
Digifanatic: "Good idea."
Metal Man begins walking back to HQ.
Panzer: "Dirt is also good."
Dragoshi: "I've had enough of this ridiculousness for one day."
Digifanatic: "And a happy new year."
Panzer follows Metal, briefly scanning the area with her scope.
Digifanatic: *Starts walking back...*
Ganondorf: "Samus also says she is angry her ship was destroyed. Too bad she didn't get an insurance policy."
Dragoshi: *Also starts walking back.*
Ganondorf: *He walks down the hill.*
Julian: "I can get the Foundation to turn this into a prime piece of land again. A hotel near the stadium...now that'd be nice." *Heads back to the stadium.*
Digifanatic: "Uh, Ganondorf? Julian's--yeah, see?"
Metal Man (GM): Panzer sees that, for once, there are no snipers, pits, maniacs, or rogue ice cream men.
Panzer: "Not my fault. I had to get out of that place. Fuck her ship. Should have built it better."
Panzer shoulders the rifle and relaxes... Then breaks into a frantic run. "PRESENTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Metal Man: "Indeed."
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man walks off into HQ, as does Ganondorf...
Dragoshi: *Almost stumbles and rolls backwards, but is teetering, then plants one foot forward* "Phew."
Metal Man (GM): END SEASON... 12?!?!?!?! Well, not quite.
Metal Man (GM): Season 12 credits/disclaimers/monkeys!
Metal Man (GM): Head Story people: Metal Man, Nick Caligo. System stuff: Nick Caligo, Metal Man. PHP: Metal Man, Xkeeper, Pieces of shards and shadows of Glyph Phoenix. Players: (Estimated) Blade, Metal Man, Gujin, John, MCV_Driver, Aetos, Digi, Dragoshi, Panzer, Nick_Caligo, Dahl, Mereck Zephyr, The Akilled Corpse of Kamui, Chance Lucent/DD, Oceanblaze, Trigger, Wolfman. Some other people I forget about. Aribar.
Metal Man (GM): Random Inclusion in Credits: Jay Resop, Shane, various Jul people, Mobiusrp people, inexplicable mention of Gibby.
Metal Man (GM): Special Thanks to anyone else I forgot or have seen or sees the credits... and janitors... because otherwise every area ICly would be a mess.
Metal Man (GM): And GM_Link, for not becoming head GM of SSQ ever.
Digifanatic: And special thanks to Deloth for not making Aribar suffer this season. Kidding.
Metal Man (GM): Oh, yeah. Thanks to Locos for not derailing the plot this season... and also for not being around to prevent me from using Barely.
Metal Man (GM): This mission brought to you by: Deloth's Corpse Productions.
Metal Man (GM): And a Final Cinema for the moment. An unknown person has been watching the whole time. He walks onto the battlefield, right to where the dead Count Blech is. He picks up a piece of his coat.
???: "Alas. He didn't know me. And he didn't look for bullets."
Metal Man (GM): The mysterious person steps over the corpse and goes atop the hill. He picks up some energy.
???: "With that chapter behind us, it's now time to--"
Metal Man (GM): *Slips on rock.*
???: "Argh! It's the rock of death!"
Metal Man (GM): He shakes his fist. Indeed, one of the rocks has been cursed all this time. He shoots at the rock, but it hits a tree and knocks Jessie of team rocket out of it instead.
???: "...What are YOU doing here?"
Jessie: "Well, we tried to pickpocket this green guy, and then he told us he was a part of the Salvation army, and then he chased us with a weed whacker!"
Metal_Man: The mysterious person steps over the corpse and goes atop the hill. He picks up some energy.
???: "But the guy who was here was dark-colored until the last few minutes."
Jessie: "I know! This guy... this guy was a different shade of green!"
???: "...Whatever." He turns his back.
Metal Man (GM): Suddenly, Bowser appears, waving his fist. "I'm NOT IN THE SALVATION ARMY you pansy! Rrraaarggghhh!!!"
Jessie: "Ahhhhhh!!!" *Runs.*
Metal Man (GM): The man turns around and sees Jessie is gone, and then shrugs and walks back down the hill.
???: "I guess they'll have to try harder next time if they want to--"
Metal Man (GM): He slips on a rock and falls down the hill. "Oof! Agh! Gah! Bah!"
THE END.

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