Super Smash Quest - Story - Chapter 444: The Final Fight

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Dates: April 26, & 29th, 2008.
Metal Man (GM): Grodus is gone. Apparently, planning to sue Crazy Hand for forcing him to be in that battle in the first place. The dark mist slowly fades around. It is low on power. Indeed. You notice something very odd--the way back is gone. More gone than before.
Digifanatic: *looks behind.* "Well, of course."
Smash Dex: "We appear to have lost contact with the rest of the world... or perhaps the rest of the world is gone?"
Digifanatic: "I think it'd be the former."
Trigger: "All I have to say is... what the hell."
Metal Man (GM): The mist spits and hisses, but it cannot throw any more stuff around.
Deloth: "Sooooo... what next?"
Metal Man (GM): It, however, takes on the form of one last thing. Oddly, a pock-marked Kales Brando.
Chancé Lucent: "We are in a bubble, a gradual movement from one plain to the next. It might not be right, but sounds good."
Digifanatic: "Well, this should be interesting."
Kales Brando: "So... we meet again, Questers." The voice sounds... different. "Ever since our first meeting I knew it would come down to this..." It speaks hoarsely and seems to phase in and out of reality. "While I long pretended to be related to Klumsy, the truth is, nothing you've seen makes any sense. I've decided to give you a little help rather than let you be destroyed by... well, the master plan."
Digifanatic: "Oh?"
Dragoshi: "...the master plan?"
Kales Brando: "The one you've been in, the one which doesn't go away. The thing which even The Void cannot violate; indeed, he simply operated around it, pushing things left and right to avoid getting in its path."
Deloth: "So what's the plan?"
Metal Man (GM): A shiny portal emerges behind the Questers. Panzer flies out, alongside a collection of cans and jars. Apparently, something is really amiss, because you see a blank void behind her. Almost like something was... erased.
Kales Brando: "The plan? It is simple. Forever and ever, you were trapped to do odd jobs."
Deloth: "Gah! It's the crazy woman who shot me in the head! RUN AWAY!"
Kales Brando: "The very nature of your reality became sentient. It is aware of us all now."
Digifanatic: "...Relax, Deloth."
Dragoshi: *Just stares at the blank void while listening to Kales.* "...That's not good at all, is it."
Panzer stands and brushes herself off and growls. "Motherfucking low-down scurvy... Wait. This isn't my bar..."
Kales Brando: "I myself, the force of all enemies you have encountered up to this point, have realized its malfunction... perhaps a little too late, for I gleefully joined in on its games." He looks to Panzer.
Deloth: "But she shot me in the head!"
Dragoshi: "...But you got better."
Kales Brando: "You're lucky I grabbed you. This world is falling apart, and it nearly took you with it."
Chancé Lucent: "Deloth, you had a tower dropped on you. Calm down."
Panzer looks at Kales. "What? Grabbed who?"
Kales Brando: "Well... maybe not falling apart... but it is focusing all its power to try and stop you now. You got its attention."
Chancé Lucent: "Belief creates reality?"
Kales Brando: "I shall use the last of my powers to antagonize this world for you... and then that shall be the end for me and all your foes in this realm... except the one immediately ahead of you." He looks resigned. "It was a mistake to keep summoning more enemies after the last true battle; I claim responsibility."
Digifanatic: "Huh?"
Metal Man (GM): The upside-down stadium has an upside-down door under the stands which leads on. It has no gap, and is blocked.
Dragoshi: "Hm?" *Continues staring at that thar blank void.*
Kales Brando: "It shall become clear some other day." He chucks his sword across the gap, and walks into the gap, vanishing. A bridge of darkness stands in its place.
Panzer brushes a few cans off her boots and sighs. "I need to retire. This shit is getting too weird. But that thing ATE MY FAVORITE BAR!"
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man falls out of a portal, upside-down, across the bridge. His desk lands beside him.
Trigger: 0_0 "...Thanks for dropping in?"
Metal Man: "...Ow." He gets up. "Well, it appears the damage to this realm is a bit more serious than I expected. I guess all we can do is find our way out of this mess."
Dragoshi: *Blinks as he turns around to see the upside-down Metal. ...And his desk.* "Yep."
Metal Man: "The world as we know it seems to be vanishing. Whatever you did took the wind out of all those evil guys who keep on attacking."
Digifanatic: "So, wait... even if we didn't decide to do this... mission... this world would still be screwy?"
Metal Man: "It has been all this time. But now something worse seems to be happening, and if we don't hurry it may be more than this world we lose." As if that's bad enough.
Panzer: "... Metal. Where is my tank at?"
Metal Man: "Same place as my CAC, I'm afraid. Entire headquarters building up and disappeared. Nearly got me, too, but Professor Oak shoved me into a warp. Too bad I didn't see him escape."
Deloth: "HQ is GONE?!"
Digifanatic: "Sounds like it... again."
Trigger: "...Wow."
Digifanatic: "This planet just became the new Toad Town."
Metal Man: "You think that's bad? The actions in here did more than that. HQ took the longest to fade. We were floating in a wasteland for a moment there before it finally got HQ."
Dragoshi: "Hoo boy." *Sighs as he starts lookin' over his weapons.*
Panzer: "The tank was in a separate building though."
Chancé Lucent: "... Well, guess Val disappeared too." *Blows nose.*
Deloth: "So it's not ALL bad, then."
Digifanatic stares at Deloth for a few seconds.
Metal Man: "My bet is we have to get on from here." *Crosses arms.* "Unless we want to sit and contemplate the world vanishing."
Panzer: "Where is the idiot responsible for my tank vanishing?"
Digifanatic: "Anyways, we have to get a move on."
Deloth: "Fine by me. Let's go." He starts across the bridge.
Metal Man: "Most likely also ahead. I heard some mumbo-jumbo about evil itself vanishing to help you or something through the dex." He walks forward with you.
Trigger follows behind Deloth.
Digifanatic follows.
Panzer follows along, muttering curses. "Evil, helping me, what?"
Metal Man: "It's all nonsense to me. I'm gonna find out what's at the end of this maze and beat it to death, myself."
Chancé Lucent: "... *mumble.*IamgoingtofeedDelothbakedtowerforafewmonths.*mumble.* "Onwards."
Dragoshi: *Moseys on along.* "Might as well do the same."
Metal Man (GM): Walking forwards, you see various charts. Incredibly complex charts, alongside what would have been the old stadium area. It shows images of how the Stadium evolved and eventually mutated. At its heart is a single document.
Panzer tries to see the document?
Metal Man (GM): 'The Evolution of the Stadium' --- 'Originally it was about the fighters fighting one another, and the Smashers keeping order. But as time went on, the fighters were abandoned, the Stadium was ignored, and all centered around people protecting the world--people who had not been intended to do so. By virtue of this they became greater than most other heroes, overshadowing all villains and other heroes. It is from here this would perpetuate forever.'
Digifanatic: *looks at the central document.* "I've got a feeling where this is going."
Metal Man: "Pft. What does that thing know? Fighters fight all the time! Jiggly..snarf... and... Forx!"
Digifanatic: "What we're seeing is a fast-forwarded account of this world if we leave it."
Panzer looks at Metal. "Are you short-circuiting?"
Metal Man: "No." *Looks at the dex.* "Ohhh... well, I just forgot their names for a moment there. It has been a while." He walks on quickly for some reason.
Digifanatic: "It's like we've been told that nobody's going to threaten this world, we listen, and then like, 50 or 100 years later when we've all retired and/or died, something is threatening this planet and there's nothing we could do about it. At least, that's how I interpret it. Then again, who knows what Turion looks like now."
Metal Man (GM): After a bit of strange, 4th-wallish stuff, you come to a stop inside the small building. It is clear that you're not in Kansas anymore. A great door with a weird lock in it has a simple sign;
Deloth: "I dunno. This whole thing is just nuts..."
Digifanatic: *reads.*
Metal Man (GM): 'Only those who hold that which is above them may enter.'
Deloth: "..." *looks up.*
Chancé Lucent looks up.
Panzer looks around for anything useful.
Digifanatic: "Maybe it's not a material possession, but it probably is."
Metal Man (GM): You see... absolutely nothing. It's just another mind-bendingly annoying puzzle. Only the things you have on you are here.
Metal Man: "Hm. If only I could carve through the walls around it... naah."
Digifanatic: "Yeah, it's probably a mental or spiritual possession."
Metal Man (GM): A lock in the very middle of the door.
Panzer: "SIMBER online?"
Digifanatic checks the lock to see what kind it is.
Chancé Lucent knocks on the door.
Panzer feels around in her armor to see what sort of things she has with her. A bottle of schnapps. That's about it. "Goddammit."
Metal Man: "SIMBER isn't anywhere here."
Metal Man (GM): The lock looks like a keyhole... with a glassy thing inside it already?
Panzer reaches for the thing inside. "Shiny..."
Digifanatic: "Huh..." *looks at the glass object and tries to scan it.*
Deloth: "Um... don't touch it, Panzer. Please? And don't hurt me in the process..."
Metal Man (GM): You grab it. It's stuck in there, but... it's a camera. Most tellingly, it's pointed above your head... most people's heads, even.
Panzer turns to see its point of view.
Digifanatic: "Hmmm... take a picture of what's above us? Seems silly, but it might be what that sign means."
Chancé Lucent holds up his frying pan and tries to go through the door?
Metal Man (GM): The camera sees Chance` and the door opens.
Deloth: "...Huh."
Metal Man (GM): From the point of view of the camera, Panzer, you see mostly that frying pan.
Panzer blinks and lifts a brow.
Chancé Lucent: "Woohoo?"
Trigger: "..."
Chancé Lucent enters.
Panzer: "Kay... The camera likes cooking?"
Digifanatic continues to hold his Dex and moves it over his head, trying to get it to face the camera...
Metal Man (GM): The next obstacle is a weird staircase, which is upside-down and glowing oddly. A sign next to it says 'Cut to the heart of the problem to proceed.'
Digifanatic: *Or that's not necessary--onward!*
Deloth walks over to the staircase and examines the sign.
Dragoshi: *Shakes head.* "No... More like it was waiting for someone to hold something up to it's line of vision. I think. *Shrugs, and enters."
Metal Man (GM): The middle of the staircase glows a bit oddly as well.
Deloth: "...Want me to start slashing?"
Panzer fires towards the glowyness.
Metal Man (GM): No need to roll for this one. *BLAM* It collapses, revealing another puzzle. This one is a bunch of spinning blades. 'Safety is backwards.' It says next to this one.
Panzer grumbles.
Deloth: "Hmm..."
Chancé Lucent walks backwards through the blades.
Digifanatic checks out the axes/directions of rotation...
Deloth turns around and walks backwards toward the bla--same. Dammit, Chance, you stole my thunder.
Panzer: "Ytefas?"
Metal Man (GM): Nothing happens. Chance` walks backwards...
Panzer turns around and looks behind her.
Metal Man (GM): ...And moves through the blades. Clearly the people who put these up were intending to scare away would-be intruders, not actually puzzle them.
Chancé Lucent: "Victory. (\/)"
Panzer is totally lost and just waits to see what the others do.
Digifanatic mimics Chancé.
Deloth: "Saaaay... these traps are fun."
Dragoshi: *Does what Chance does and walks backwards.*
Metal Man (GM): Digi and Chance` walk safely through the blades, backwards.
Panzer walks forwards, just to be different. And dies. XD.
Metal Man (GM): *BONK* Actually, all that happens is being launched away from the blades, Panzer. Lives don't mean much in this strange mess at them moment.
Panzer grumbles and walks backwards, having little balance going backwards >< "Retreat just isn't programmed. I feel like an idiot."
Deloth: "But it's fun!"
Panzer: "To you it is. I could have just climbed up the wall to the staircase, you know."
Metal Man (GM): You walk on out, and, lo and behold, there's a final staircase. It leads up into the light.
Deloth goes towards the light... yes, go to the light... wait, are we dying?
Panzer: "Bright."
Metal Man (GM): The other end seems rather peaceful, although there is no obvious exit from the area. It's a green field, and there is, seemingly, a large number of the past Questers.
Chancé Lucent: "Hmm, I should develop a solar cooker... wait... the kitchen! It's gone! My cookbooks! Arg!"
Metal Man (GM): The remote you search for stands amongst them. Metal Man rubs his chin.
Panzer blinks. "Hey. My buddies!"
Dragoshi: "Quite." *Puts on his ridiculous shades, and moves on up, moves on up, somethin' somethin, I forgot the lyriiiics!*
Metal Man: "I don't trust the looks of this. Nobody said that'd be there. The traps, yes. The evil stuff, yes. But the other Questers?"
Panzer is surprised she isn't here. Or is she?
Metal Man (GM): Nope. Locos isn't there either.
Deloth: "I know. Something is screwy here..."
Panzer sees if there is a pattern to the people here.
Digifanatic: *Is Brat Digi there?*
Metal Man (GM): You see Ely, Gibby, SSTrihan... Sally... Green, Roybert, Zipzop... Burger, Soursurfer...
Panzer: "People who up and vanished? Have clones?"
Metal Man (GM): None of you are there; also there is Tempest, Klumsy, Wolfman, Alys...
Metal Man: "I dunno. They're all people who aren't us."
Panzer: "Well fucking duh."
Metal Man (GM): They are rather silent in the strangely quiet field. The remote sits above all of them, even surrounded by them.
Digifanatic: "Not only are they not us, they're among the earliest of us."
Panzer wanders to the edge of the field, if there is one.
Metal Man (GM): Canadian Yosheh, Jay, John, Game Guru, Kinnin, Zack, Kopaka, Nightwing, Nodal Whisk, Mr T... they're all there.
Panzer: Seems to all be up to one particular point in time.
Metal Man (GM): Walking in, one would see something odd. The green field... it doesn't sound much like a field as you walk across it. It seems... crunchy...
Chancé Lucent looks down.
Deloth: "Huh..."
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man walks in, shielding his VISOR of all things, from the light.
Panzer looks down. Digs a bit with her boot.
Metal Man: "This light's too sinister for my taste."
Panzer: "Junkyard?"
Deloth jumps up and down a few times on the ground. Evil Astroturf?
Digifanatic wonders if some of the more recent dropouts, like Garrick and company, are there.
Metal Man (GM): Indeed, they are. Digging reveals something... debris, pieces of busted artifacts...
Digifanatic: *looks at all of them.* "Hello?"
Panzer: "I'm sure that if I were not here, I'd be here."
Metal Man (GM): They don't say anything.
Panzer kneels and digs around a bit more.
Digifanatic: *to Panz.* "I wouldn't be surprised."
Deloth: "...Are we standing on some kind of cosmic trash heap or something?"
Metal Man (GM): You see more and more artifacts. Old pieces of paper. Dead enemies. You begin to hit something strange as you get further down. It's the wreckage of Eisnaught.
Panzer blinks. Digs around it.
Chancé Lucent: "It's the giant recycle bin?"
Dragoshi: "...Apparently so."
Metal Man (GM): You dig into it further, finding a piece of paper. It bears Ivan's handwriting.
Panzer: "Seems that all our past memories and what not are here from old missions. Seems we're in a junkyard of the past or something." She reads it.
Metal Man (GM): 'Upon rigorous testing, I discovered the existence of the true usage of the Null Zone. Our entire realm came from it originally-that which is true, that from before The Void's destruction. Inside there is stored the real world--but in opening it I encountered a most strange entity, one which disagreed with me when I mentioned the chaos that the world was in and how it should be allowed to become normal again.'
Deloth: "...Uh-oh."
Metal Man (GM): 'Here it threw me, and my city, and all else which had come close to conflicting its vision. Here I write my last sentence. -Ivan Robotnik'
Panzer: "So I was right. All the junk comes here. Where is Morph Moth, then?"
Digifanatic: "Well, that just made this a bit deeper then."
Dex: "Somewhere in here, his signature is detected."
Panzer digs more. "I'll be damned to find ancient Egypt in here."
Metal Man (GM): The illusion wavers. The other Questers glance at you before, one-by-one, fading out. The master fighter remote floats up... and into the hands of a strange being which appears out of the mist of the former Questers.
Chancé Lucent: "Hmm, he must of taken design advice from Majora."
Panzer frowns. "I think it is time to go before we become past memories."
Deloth: *Sword out, ready to use if needed.* "Drop the remote."
???: "Oh, what a silly word for you to say." It forms full, revealing itself to be... a sort of immense man made of books.
Dragoshi: *Looks at the strange being, and mumbles pulling his shades off, and putting them away, hands nearing his assault rifle, just in case. "And, you are..?"*
???: "I know what you are plotting. You have become far too dynamic! You wish to escape from here, don't you?"
Panzer opens a comm link detectable to all inherent reploids. "Anyone out there? This is Hunter Panzer. Respond." Then she speaks to the... thing. "Father Time?"
???: "Don't even try to call backup. I broke them all into bits and shoved them here before you arrived. Cost me my right hand man, but... that's life."
Metal Man: "What? What the heck are you? You don't make any sense. Kuja and The Void are the only people known to posses that kind of power."
Panzer assumingly gets static. "Fucker. Killed my friends. My kind..."
Dragoshi: "Maybe this is that thing Kales was talking about...?"
Chancé Lucent: "Hrm, Hello Chessmaster, you are the one controlling the events then?"
???: "Of course I don't make sense! No one should know I exist. You're trying to find yourselves a new mission, aren't you? Well I won't let you! You must forever protect this world from whatever appears, no matter how ridiculous or similar they are to the others. I had those Questers as good as caught, and then you broke the cycle!"
Panzer: "Get off your high horse old man."
Dragoshi: "Well, that's fine by me. That cycle was far too repetitive, anyway!"
???: "The Master Hand broke his creation mandate in telling you about this place. For that, I ripped him to shreds. You're the only people left now. Unless... you join me, and aid me to perpetuate the cycle."
Chancé Lucent: "..."
Dragoshi: "...Let me put it nicely."
???: "Join me, and forever be the heroes who win!"
Chancé Lucent: "Is there a handbook? A villains trope speech writer? I want to kick him."
???: "Who cares if there's fifteen Robotniks? Each and every one is better than the last!"
Panzer: "Winning consists of eradicating evil, you seem to be evil so who would win?"
Chancé Lucent: "Or the writer, unless..."
Deloth: "Besides, what's the point of fighting if you know you're gonna win all the time? Where's the fun in that?"
???: "The writer of villain speeches is me, you fool. They all read the lines I made for them! Just as I once made them for the likes of you, until you became... different."
Panzer: "This is like a bad Disney movie."
Metal Man: "Yeah, and I hate Disney movies. Let's blast this thing to bits."
Panzer: "Different?"
Chancé Lucent: "... ... Arg, but... have you even heard of... bleh."
Panzer: "Who is different?"
Digifanatic: "This is definitely a change of pace."
Panzer: "What I did in lower Asia has nothing to do with man, I was doing my job and the village was in the friggen way."
???: "No longer did you sit around gaining infinite power. You gave it up for balance! Balance I hate! Death to it!"
Dragoshi: "...Fair enough..."
???: "Charles Magellean was my best friend... and you killed him!"
Panzer perks up. "I like power."
Dragoshi: *Looks at the man.* "Good. I don't think many people liked him in the first damned place, anyway."
???: "Now I see you, coming with some attempt to stamp 'The End' on me. But that will not happen. I shall kill you all and continue the cycle forever!!!"
Panzer: "But heeeeeeeeyyyyy... I want power."
Metal Man (GM): The ground shakes and stuff begins ripping out of it. It's like that freaky battlefield you once fought The Void on--but worse. Shreds of reality flying around everywhere, old characters and new tossed about at random. Explosions, lightning, rain... it's madness!
???: "You had your chance and you wasted it. Now I shall unmake you!"
Panzer: "Give me power and maybe I'll keep you as a pet or something."
Chancé Lucent: "... Can't even make an original battle field."
Dragoshi: *To the guy.* "Oh, shut up." *Pulls out his assault rifle and readies it.*
Chancé Lucent: "Tsk."
Dragoshi: "Oh, who gives a fuck, Chancé?"
Panzer looks at Metal. "Damn you, Made him angry and now I can't get power!"
Deloth: "Shut up, Panzer."
Metal Man: "But I thought you said he was a bad Disney movie? I want that sort of stuff dead, that's why I agreed to this mission in the first place."
Chancé Lucent: "Ah, OK Dragoshi, I'll say it with potion."
Panzer glares at Deloth and levels her rifle with his head. "Zip it. There's never any telling when the Questers will fall. I need everything I can have to be prepared to go on to whatever calls me next."
Metal Man: "Whatever. Let's kick this bozo's face in and find ourselves some new digs. Maybe we can steal his power while we're at it."
Panzer lifts her rifle and sighs. "Alright Metal."
???: "You're right... words no longer describe my anger at you." He shuts up, creating a sort of ethereal chaos around him.
Panzer scratches her head. "Metal, would two evils cancel out one another?"
Metal Man: "I'd think so, myself."
Digifanatic: "Huh?"
Panzer: "Can you trace Sigma's corpse here?"
Metal Man cracks his knuckles "I'm going to punch that ugly thing into dust--Oh... uhhh..."
Dex: "It is in here... under a ton or two of rubble."
Panzer: "Damn. Could have just used his Virus to cancel out that guy."
Metal Man: "I don't think he's evil. More like lawful stupid."
Deloth: "Lawful batshit crazy."
Panzer: "The Virus is derived from Maverick Zero, the most evil thing in my realm."
Chancé Lucent: "Or Chaotic Stupid?"
Metal Man: "I thought that was Kuja."
The Book: "..." He raises his hands and, suddenly, it rains characters. Disposable ones. Exploding disposable ones. Threatens all!
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man is hit. Another interesting thing--the 3 lives are back, and damage from that previous battle healed. The Book apparently hates rules not going his way. The Bookman then holds up an arm at Dragoshi. A sonic cone made up of entirely all the one-liners Dragoshi has ever made flies at him. Also roll dodge, Deloth, a 50-damage hit-all attack threatened you. The roll had 6 successes, so it hits you, Deloth.
Dragoshi: *Sidestep.*
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi dodges the screams of 'bread' and 'what the hell' They chisel a giant gouge beside him.
Deloth: *50'd!*
Metal Man (GM): The bookman then crosses his arms.
Dragoshi: "...I don't remember any use of bread."
Metal Man (GM): The Book, however, knows when you've been naughty... when you've been nice... and other strange things.
Metal Man: "Grrr. Eat fist, bookface!"
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man lunges at the Book's face and pounds at it with his fists.
Deloth runs in for two slashes at Bookman's arms! Er... arm analogues! Whatever!
Metal Man (GM): Miss miss hit; the Book takes
Dragoshi: *Dragoshi then shrugs, and attempts Aerodrill the Book, then shoot it in the face with his assault rifle.*
Chancé Lucent: "It's Potion--psyche! Shield time!"
Metal Man (GM): Hit hit hit.
Chancé Lucent: "Tears of light! Panzer, Deloth, Self."
Metal Man (GM): Hit, Dragoshi.
Digifanatic decides to launch an Icy Kick immediately followed by a Fire Punch--trying at least to hit with quicker moves.
Metal Man (GM): Miss miss hit, Chancé Lucent Oh, right. Hit, miss, Digi. That leaves... Deloth. The Book rolls up his sleeves. Then he simply holds out his arms. The debris field flies through everyone. But does it harm them? Threatens all. Metal man is hit. 70 damage to him; 60 to Digi. 70 damage to Chancé Lucent.
Deloth: *Autoblock, then!*
Metal Man (GM): 60 damage to Dragoshi.
Chancé Lucent: *Shield Safety!*
Metal Man (GM): The Book chuckles to himself and ends his turn.
Metal Man: "Man, this guy's a tough guy! We gotta kill him quick, or we're all toast!"
Dragoshi: "...I thought that was obvious in the first place."
Digifanatic realizes that the Book takes very little time to recover, so he'll take a chance and go for one big hit via Hyper Beam Matrix rather than whittling it away with weaker moves.
Chancé Lucent: "Potion time, with the memory of Val, let the potion hit the idiot." *Cough.* *Ahem.*
Metal Man (GM): Hit, Digi. *BLAM.*
Chancé Lucent: "Who said the power of love was useless?"
The Book points to the sky. An endless train of meteorites viciously crashes at Chance`. The meteorites blow up Chance`, knocking him to 1 HP. The Book scoffs. The Book: "It is not love, but stupidity which conquers all!"
Chancé Lucent: "...Then why haven't you beaten us yet?"
Metal Man (GM): On this tangent, he summons a large laser gun and decides to bust a cap into Dragoshi.
Dragoshi: *Just... barely hangs on. Whee.*
Metal Man: "Man, this guy's really freaky. I'm gonna have to beat his snotty head in." Metal Man rockets up into the air, and then, right-foot first, goes to crash-land on The Book.
Metal Man (GM): *SPLAT*
Deloth starts charging up a Wing Slam.
Chancé Lucent: "Dog-ear his pages!"
Metal Man (GM): The Book raises his hands, then rips reality in two and puts it together again. Whether or not the rip hits you is based on your dodge... All hit have their current HP halved.
Metal Man: "Argh!"
Deloth: *DEMI'D.*
Chancé Lucent: "That was strangely ineffective."
Digifanatic: *Swing and a miss!*
The Book then holds out a hand. Hordes of flaming ace cards fly out at all of you and explode. The Book: "I know all the tricks, because I am all the tricks!"
Deloth: "Oh, shaddap."
Metal Man (GM): You get a small break from his mannerisms, as apparently the universe takes a lot of energy to rip in two.
Deloth: *Wing... SMAAAAAASH!*
Digifanatic lets out one more Fire Punch, following with an Icy Kick, before Mushrooming himself to get back some of his lost HP...
Metal Man (GM): Hit.
Chancé Lucent: *Dead.*
Dragoshi: *Shouldn't really be surprised that this happened, but... that was just arghtastic. Mainly because of it being 5 over my HP...*
Metal Man (GM): The Book blinks. Metal Man creaks his helmet, then takes out the Star Board and leaps at The Book, violently flailing it around as a flaming club at him.
Chancé Lucent: "Hmm, Might as well keep us alive. Tears of life! Self, Digi, Deloth!"
Digifanatic attempts something he hasn't done yet this match... blast The Book with some music... after all, a bit of Lennon/McCartney orchestral cacophony seems to fit in with all of the other insanities being tossed into the fray!
Metal Man (GM): Hit, hit, hit. 55 damage total--so many of them went 2 over the Book's DV @_@. The Book points at Digi. A Black hole threatens to eat Digi!
Digifanatic: *Shield broken.* *Unless this just drains it's potential.*
Metal Man (GM): He crosses his arms, then leaps up and smashes the ground, creating a massive ...fissure! at Digi. Digi takes 200 damage from the explosive attack. And The Book has wasted yet more time. The shield was eaten by the Black hole.
Chancé Lucent: "More Tears! Metal, and Dragoshi!"
Deloth: *Let's try a Bomb Kick. Maybe that'll set it on FIYAR! I like FIYAR.*
Dragoshi: *Pops up again, and spits a bunch o' acid in The Book's face.*
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi miss, Deloth miss, Dragoshi miss, Dragoshi miss Deloth again :p
Chancé Lucent: "Block Drop!"
Metal Man (GM): Hit. Metal Man attacks him with the Star Board again. Hit, hit, hit... but all of such high magnitude... ouch. @_@.
Chancé Lucent: "We should drag you on missions more often metal."
Metal Man: "Heh. I've been working out in my spare time."
Dragoshi: "Well, that's good to hear. Anyway..." *Dragoshi tries to grab The Book, then attempt to Aerodrill him.*
Metal Man (GM): Hit, hit.
Dragoshi: *three for the aerodrill.*
Metal Man (GM): The Book cracks his papery knuckles, then he holds up his hands and hurls a cloud of lightning at everybody. Metal Man's shield takes the hit for him.
Metal Man: "Huh. You've been really helpful, Chance`."
Dragoshi: *Shield also takes the hit for him.* "Very much so." *Nods.*
Deloth: *Autoblock!*
Chancé Lucent: *Shield takes the hit.* "Curses, that would of been a powerful stored energy."
Deloth: *C'mon, Fire Twist, I wanna see a disco inferno. Please?*
Digifanatic decides to calmly hold his own and just go for one move this turn--simply rattling Book's cage with one of those golf club battering-ram shots. *Smash.*
Metal Man (GM): Hit, miss. The Book holds up a fist.
The Book: "You're only giving me more power! I have already won!" The ground shakes as he summons a whole ton of past characters and debris. Eisnaught looms above your heads. "You want your beloved city back? Here! Take it!"
Dragoshi: "..."
Metal Man (GM): Eisnaught crashes down at everybody!!!!
Metal Man: "Gahhhhh!!!!"
Dragoshi: *...ow.*
Metal Man (GM): Knocks out one of Metal's lives.
Digifanatic: *Oh snap 10 HP left.*
Deloth: *-1 Life. Rez out, Tron!*
The Book: "I'll kill every one of your lives, unlike the people I intentionally crippled for you!"
Chancé Lucent: "... Really now... Can't you be original, and have original attacks?"
The Book: "How often do cities fall on people?"
Chancé Lucent: "Ask Deloth."
Dragoshi: "A lot, depending on the scenario."
The Book: "Pft! You don't know who I am if you expect new things! You're just confused!"
Dragoshi: "Right, right. And I haven't been hit with a fucking spaceship" *Eyeroll.*
Chancé Lucent eats 4 mushrooms.
Dragoshi: *Eats 2 Mushrooms.*
Chancé Lucent: "What happened to that remote anyway? Dragoshi, can you see/steal it?"
Dex: "The remote is inside him. He is using its immense power to protect himself."
Dragoshi: "...I thought so."
Chancé Lucent: "Tears of light! Self, Dragoshi."
Dragoshi: "Friggin' predictable 'berk."
Digifanatic decides to continue holding himself to one attack for now--can't take that high defense for granted. Hyper Beam Matrix. *This can't end well.*
Metal Man (GM): Miss.
Deloth: *Revive!*
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man returns, just in time to try to stomp the big man once more. Nope!
Deloth: *'Nother pair of sword swipes!*
Metal Man (GM): One hit.
Dragoshi: *Tries to shoot The Book through the heart with a pair of assault rifle blasts.*
Metal Man (GM): Hit, hit. The Book summons images of Master and Crazy Hand, then proceeds to try to smash you all into dust with them. Metal Man is hit... another
Deloth: *pounded. Friggin' gloves.*
Digifanatic: *2 down, 1 to go.*
Chancé Lucent: *shield breaker.*
Dragoshi: *SHIELD BREAK.*
Chancé Lucent: "Companion Cube X2!"
Metal Man (GM): Miss, hit. The Book creates a large tornado of fire, and sets it at everybody. Metal is hit...
Dragoshi: *Dragoshi has had a history of handling tornadoes... Sure, they were the opposite of fire, but still. It's enough experience for him to dodge it with ease.*
Chancé Lucent: "This energy should come in handy."
Metal Man (GM): Mirror... hit fire. Fire absorbed. The fire that was gonna hit Chance`, at least.
Digifanatic at least tries to damage him this time. A Day in the Life starts this off, and hopefully while THE ENCLOSED DESTRUCTION BOOK. BOOK. BOOK. BOOK. BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB--*Mario explodes.* is thrown off by the shot, one Icy Kick coming up.
Metal Man: "This guy won't die, will he?" *Runs over, violently swinging at him.* "Die, dang it! Die!!!!"
Metal Man (GM): Miss hit hit... Miss.
Deloth ... um... tries to jump up and grab one of Bookmeister's pages!
Dragoshi: *And, Dragoshi decides to C. Grip this guy, then follow up with shooting him in the face.*
Metal Man (GM): Hit, miss... Hit Miss You rip a page out, Deloth. You realize he has too many to kill him by ripping them out, though. Just the page of contents would take a couple days to destroy that way.
Deloth: *Yeah, that's why I kept slicing him up with my sword. :P*
Metal Man (GM): Setting him on fire and beating him up seems to work best.
Deloth stuffs the page into his pocket. Maybe he can blow something up with it later or something.
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man, slow as usual. The Book hurls a giant bomb at all of you. Then another one. 45 damage each hit, threatens all.
Dragoshi: *Sidesteps the first, but falls right into the second. e_e.*
Deloth: *YOUR LIFE A SPLODE.*
Digifanatic: *He is not looking good, PERIOD.*
The Book: "Hah! You're all pathetic! You have no way to stop me!"
Dragoshi: "You're the only pathetic one here."
Digifanatic: "Well, if you're not pathetic, you're at least taking your scripts for granted. Which is just as bad."
Dragoshi: "If not worse."
The Book: "I am the story! You won't beat me!"
Dragoshi: "Well, you're a really shitty story."
Chancé Lucent: "Sorry, but, the good guys sill win."
Dragoshi: "It's time someone threw you in the paper shredder."
The Book: "I'll clog any one you throw at me!"
Dragoshi: *about time "Whatever..."
Chancé Lucent: "Tears of light! Self, Digi!"
Metal Man (GM): The Book's only partially defeated. He's so ginormously complex and filled with pages that, even at maximum violence mode, you will be close if you beat him with just who is here. The Book creates a large flash in the sky and rains down flaming hail on everyone!
Digifanatic: *Shield bursts.*
Chancé Lucent: *Shield breaker.*
Digifanatic: *JIGGLYPUUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuuuuuu... not quite.*
Dragoshi: *Barely... barely alive. e_e.*
The Book: "Unlike the villains I helped you beat, I do not relent! You will all die!" He reinforces this by doing that annoying card attack at all of you.
Digifanatic: .oO(Now this should be the point in which some amazing intervention comes in from out of nowhere to save us all, but I doubt that's happening.)
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man leaps up to stomp The Book... Miss.
Dragoshi: *Fucking cheapass.* *Second life down...*
Digifanatic: *Screw this. Pops one Mushroom--last one--and calls it a turn.*
Deloth: *Now let's try some nice slicery-dicery. Again.*
Chancé Lucent: "I wonder, can we do a call for aid? Since realty is weak here?"
Digifanatic: "I'm not sure if our Dexes even work, communication wise. I'd say we have to take our chances and hope Julian or someone else pops in."
The Book: "Why did you think I killed everyone else? There is no help here! ha ha ha ha haaaa!"
Metal Man (GM): Hit, miss.
Chancé Lucent: "You dragged all the parts here though..."
The Book: "And they are all mine to use... against you. How else did you think Kuja won that one time? It was all because he read me!"
Chancé Lucent: "Enchant spell?"
Deloth: *thinking.* "Everyone else... please, not her too..."
Chancé Lucent: "Yes, that may work."
The Book: "You think you're merely losing? Think again! I haven't hardly powered up!"
Chancé Lucent: "Enchant, Memory!"
Metal Man (GM): You use it... but nothing much happens. The Book laughs.
The Book: "This place is my domain. You can't control or alter it."
Chancé Lucent: "We are altering you. You two bit hack of a novel."
Metal Man (GM): A rip appears in the cosmic fabric. It can't be! It's The Void!
Chancé Lucent: "..."
The Void: "Yes! Now I can kill you for good, you horrible existence!"
Metal Man (GM): The Book signs and holds up a card.
Chancé Lucent: "Unoriginal two bit hack of a book."
The Book: "You can't kill me! Because I made you! Hahahahahahaaaaa!" He fires a laser through The Void, who disintegrates.
Chancé Lucent: "Yet, we remember him? Worth a shot."
Metal Man (GM): Next up, Ivan Robotnik rises from the rubble.
Ivan Robotnik: "I'll kill you this time, abominable fi--"
The Book: *LASER.*
Metal Man (GM): He, too, is dead.
The Book: "As a great man once said, you sound like a self-help version of me."
Metal Man (GM): Kuja appears. The Book fires a laser. It doesn't work. But... Kuja just sits on the sidelines.
The Book: "What the heck is up with him?"
Kuja: "It's your fault that I'm alive to see this." He sits down, silently.
Chancé Lucent: "I don't know. Aww, I left his cake in the destroyed world."
Metal Man (GM): The chaos emeralds appear; The Book blasts them to bits.
The Book: "That should cover all the deus ex machina... I made them, after all. Except for this one... which happens to benefit me, and only me!"
Chancé Lucent: "You forgot a few."
Metal Man (GM): The image of Charles Magellean rises over The Book's head. The resulting chaos in reality causes massive beams of energy, 4th-level magic spells, and magitek grenades to explode everywhere.
The Book: "A-hahahahahahaaaaaaa!!!!"
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man loses another life to the phantasmal horror.
Chancé Lucent: "Hey Kuja, you read him, does he mention a weakness in his pages?"
Digifanatic: *Gone. Game Over. Unless you have a Phoenix Down.*
Kuja: "He can't have a weakness. He is everything. I'm only here because he destroyed all the other places for me to sit."
Chancé Lucent: "If he is everything, then how can we move past him? Oh... well, that makes sense."
Kuja: "The only reason I'm alive is because I'm not really from this realm, anyway. I will be free in due time, if this battle runs its course..."
Digifanatic is simply sent flying back, completely unresponsive... this is not good.
Chancé Lucent: "... We all have links outside this realm also, so how come we can get hurt?"
Kuja: "In your adventures, you became tainted with his energies, and him with yours. This is a battle to see who truly controls those energies: you, or him."
Chancé Lucent: "Interesting. So this is our realm too then?"
Kuja: "If you win... I don't know what happens. If he wins, he sets up the status quo over again and runs through it a couple thousand times. Either way, I will finally be free of this worthless place." He raises an eyebrow."Of course, you are a surprising lot..."
The Book: "One by one, you fall like the very bad guys I set up for you to kill. Now you will know what it's like to lose!"
Dragoshi: "At least it's better than being stuck in your asinine cycle."
Metal Man (GM): He gets a creepy grin on his face.
The Book: "But that is the thing... just because you are dead... doesn't mean I cannot recycle your story over and over again... forever and ever..."
Metal Man (GM): So, Dragoshi's turn.
Deloth: "Nnnrgh..."
Chancé Lucent: "And each time, will will try to break the cycle until we do escape."
Dragoshi: *Slowly gets up, looking rather tired, unphased by the guy's grin.* "Whatever..." *And, so Dragoshi closes his eyes and concentrates, trying to manipulate the energies of this whole mess against The Book.*
Metal Man (GM): The Book's sort of like a walking psychic energy bank...
Dragoshi: *Obviously fails.*
Metal Man (GM): The Book doesn't even bother to counter, merely laughing at you.
Dragoshi: *Shrugs.* "Well, I tried. Nothing more. Nothing less." *Looks to the others.* "Why don't you give it a try?" *And, with that, he simply shoots the laughing book in the face.*
Metal Man (GM): He dodges. The Book laughs again, charges up for another attack.
The Book: "Each person I erase makes me that much stronger!"
Metal Man: "Don't give up... this guy's just a gigantic bully. I'm sure of it."
Dragoshi: "Someone try to manipulate the energies against him..."
Chancé Lucent: "Hey book, remember what you said you destroyed all the deus ex machina?"
Kuja: "How could anyone but him control all of reality's energies?" He makes a wry smirk.
The Book: "Yes. Except for that one I used. It is mine! All mine! And it'll kill you all!"
Chancé Lucent: "Well you forgot some people, the past Questers... and Kuja. Kuja, may I ask for your help?"
Kuja: "What am I going to do, walk through him? You made sure I couldn't meddle... and now you are here."
Chancé Lucent: "You can still use magic right? How do you feel about aiding an enchant linked memory spell with a focus point of the past?"
Kuja: "The same type of magic he's throwing. Therefore, the easiest thing in the world for him to counter. Not to mention your curses prevent it from being lethal... and the people who could have undone those are dead now."
Chancé Lucent: "You mean you can;t use the magic you brought with you?"
Kuja: "Oh, I could use it, but it would not save you. It would be a waste of my energy, and perhaps singe his face a little. Pointless." He shrugs. "You chose your path; only you can save yourselves."
Chancé Lucent: "Worth a try, always ask for help if possible. All well, here it goes. enchant! Linked memories of the past Questers, when their power was so great it shattered toad town my looking at it wrong! Focus point, a relic of the past, Chancé Lucent's Gender bender candy!Hmm... a wee bit too epic."
Metal Man: "That's it, I'm gonna throw myself into a wall until that image goes from my head."
Metal Man (GM): You use the powerful enchant memory... The Book randomly crumples it and hurls it over his shoulder.
Chancé Lucent: "You're no fun."
The Book: "You are quite pathetic little people. I know all the things you know! What, you think I'd be harmed by small pieces of myself?"
Chancé Lucent: "Well, yes if you think about it. I mean, we are doing damage with our attacks. And that is a part of you."
The Book: "..." He has a knowing look on his face.
Chancé Lucent: "Oh dear, I seem to have hit on a topic you don't like."
Dragoshi: "Heheheheh... He's got a point there, yanno."
Metal Man (GM): The Book raises an... eyebrow?
The Book: "Yes. Yes you have. I am awe-struck with your knowledge. Clearly, you have got me now."
Chancé Lucent: "... Heh, you just changed a bit book."
Kuja rubs his chin thoughtfully, then scoffs, shaking his head.
Chancé Lucent: "Hrm. *Sits thinking.*"
The Book: "Come! Poke me to death with your inferior weapons. Surely I won't use my knowledge of all magic ever to annihilate you on the next page of this story."
Chancé Lucent: "..."
Metal Man: "I think I liked him better when he wasn't sarcastic." *Pokes Chance`.* "You broke him!"
Chancé Lucent: "Hmm, I wonder."
"Of course you won't," Kuja says.
Chancé Lucent: "Whoops, maybe if I attack him with a pen?"
Dragoshi: "White out."
Chancé Lucent: "That could work."
Kuja: "Because you depend on them. More than on all the plotholes and deus ex machinas in recorded history!"
The Book: "True, but with them dead, I can destroy the finicky parts which make them uncontrollable and then my cycle will be perfect!"
Kuja: "Without the Questers," he poses to the book, resting his cheek in his hand as he seems to recline in mid-air, floating freely under his magic, "You have no cycle."
Dragoshi: *To the Book.* "There is no such thing as a perfect cycle. Stop fooling yourself, ya stupid waste of paper."
Chancé Lucent: "Kuja, I love the way you manage the perfect pose."
The Book: "..." He thinks. "Sure I do!" Clearly he is in denial--or perhaps stupid. "Besides, there are always new Questers to control. It is merely these ones who are broken!"
Chancé Lucent: "You mean the ones you killed? (Or crumpled..)"
Dragoshi: "AHAHAHAHAHAHA" *Stops for a second, catching his breath.* "Stop fooling yourself. There will always be people to oppose you, regardless of what pitiful little 'fixes' you make."
Kuja: "Ha ha ha!" He stretches and flips over before seeming to lay on his stomach on an invisible cushion in the air. "I love it! He's oblivious to his own self-destruction. Yes, my friend here is correct. You've destroyed everything. Your pages blank, the Questers are all that remain of your boorish formula-written drivel. If they die... so do you."
Dragoshi: "So, you're pretty much fucked either way. *Dragoshi says, a twisted grin on his face.* "And in the end, the only winner in all of this will be Kuja. '...I think."
Metal Man (GM): He holds up a finger, to point at the air, and is silent for a moment.
The Book: "..." Then he shrugs. "No I'm not. I am unstoppable because I am everything."
Metal Man (GM): Now you know why he's so uptight. He can't even deliver a witty counter-remark to save his life.
Chancé Lucent: "Well, if we win, we may be able to rest control, restore this world, and move onto a new one not controlled by a random plot coupon."
Dragoshi: "Ah, but if you are everything, that must mean you have every weakness in the fucking book."
Metal Man: "This looks like a good time to blow him up." *Pokes Dragoshi.*
Kuja: "You are everything--except your readers."
Metal Man (GM): The Book looks a bit uncertain. Maybe he wonders if destroying some of those deus ex machina were a bad idea.
Dragoshi: "Which is-...Huh? ...Fine, fine. And I was having such a good time, too." *Shrugs, and attempts to double shoot The Book through the heart, and then C. Grip him.*
Chancé Lucent: "... And we will exist because... this is not part of the book."
Metal Man: "Have a good time, by all means. Before he blows us up and kill himself for no reason!"
Metal Man (GM): Hit, hit.
The Book: "Hm... I forgot people read things... oh well." He seems to have destroyed most of the intelligent things inside him, when he took out that last batch of things.
Dragoshi: "Sure thing, boss. Sure thing." *Smirks.*
Kuja: "They do. And if no one is there to read you, you will be no more than a lifeless binding, empty of meaning."
Dragoshi: "...So if we stop listening to his inane prattlings, he'll die? Or is it not that simple?"
Metal Man glances to Kuja. Then he turns to the Book and goes to beat him over the head with the Star Board again.
Metal Man (GM): The book is hit... once... twice.
Kuja: "Think of it. The only thing the Questers couldn't kill was me. I'm not a part of your story. Otherwise, everything upon your pages are things that they've either destroyed or saved. Every time your story ended in victory... which means, according to your--haha--GRAND CYCLE, they're going to kill you."
Chancé Lucent: "Though, I thought you could be cheered up with cake."
The Book: "That is precisely why I cannot let any of you leave this world... well, maybe you." He looks at Kuja. "See, if they leave, I am dead... but if I kill them, I am dead... but..." He shakes his head. "I'm not going to think about it anymore!"
Dragoshi: "Please, think about it some more. I'd bet it'd be rather interesting."
Kuja: "Very well then." Kuja bows. "I shall take leave of this world. At your leave!" With that, he simply... disappears.
The Book: "Yes! Now my genius plan can continue uncontested!"
Chancé Lucent: "Kuja, we know your still there watching the fight."
Metal Man: "Man, this book's whacked."
Dragoshi: "Quite. ...Hey, Metal. Got any white out?"
Chancé Lucent: "How about a pencil?"
Dragoshi: "That'd prolly' take too long."
The Book: "Behold, your doom!" Oh, gee. A whole lot of flying energy beams. This guy's been watching too much tron.
Metal Man: "Ow!"
Dragoshi: "Argh!"
Chancé Lucent: *dead.* *one life left.*
Metal Man (GM): Will cannot make the trippy lasers go away. Metal Man sits on the edge between lives, still alive though.
Dragoshi: *As does Dragoshi. ...Well, actually he's still okay but a couple more of those and he's screwed.* *Just spits out a bunch of acid at the book to eat away at it. >_>*
Metal Man (GM): One hit. A curious number dings, and a slot machine appears. That one you remember from many other battles from weird HP numbers. But The Book blows it up.
The Book: "Bah! No gimmicks! No deus ex machina! It's all me!"
Chancé Lucent: "... he is killing himself."
Metal Man: "Perhaps he got mad cow disease."
Dragoshi: "I think he's gone beyond that, Metal." *Metal.
The Book: "Now I'll get you reall good!" He floods the place with tiles, a classic Andross move. Jerk.
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man is blown away by that, losing a life. He has one left.
Chancé Lucent: "Your using a Deus ex Machina..."
Metal Man (GM): 55.
The Book: "They all belong to me. So of course I use them!"
Dragoshi: "Friggin' hypocrite."
The Book: "Here, have another!" He makes the Charles symbol again, but it blows up.
Dragoshi: "Also... Even if you do win, you'll still lose. As there's no one who will be around to play with."
The Book: "Hmmm... perhaps I shouldn't have reinforced it with epoxy..."
Chancé Lucent: "Well, enough enchanting... Tears of light!"
The Book: "I shall continue by myself. Your threats are just as null as Kuja's!"
Dragoshi: "You'll go insane from the sheer mind-numbing boredom, though."
Dex: "Analysis shows the Book to be losing power from his own destructive habits. The question is whether or not enough Questers will survive to ensure that only he dies instead of... well, us."
Chancé Lucent: "We can only try Dex, and if worse comes to worse I will turn you into a real boy and you can fight him... This Disney tale is messing with my head, bleck."
Dragoshi: *He then sighs, and continues attempting to gnaw away at The Book with bursts of acid.*
Metal Man (GM): Hit, miss. Miss. The Book smiles manically as he oversees the vast destruction. You can tell he's wiped many, many of his pages clean.
The Book: "Yes! It is working! Soon I will have absolute control..."
Dragoshi: "Keep saying that, you disillusioned bastard."
Metal Man (GM): He powers up and then holds his hands upwards. The very sky cracks and explodes, the images of it taking physical shape and falling down onto you, and then exploding.
Dragoshi: "Just... keep saying that."
Chancé Lucent: *Shield Break.*
Metal Man (GM): 65 damage if hit--Metal Man's protect saves him from it.
Dragoshi: *He stands tall, the sky's images failing to hit him at all.*
The Book: "Psh, you small ants! I quash you!"
Metal Man: "I have to wonder if the main cause of his insanity is himself." Metal Man tries to smash the book with his boot.
Dragoshi: "...Wow. I think he's starting to approach Aaron-esque levels of intelligence."
Metal Man (GM): Miss.
Dragoshi: "In any case." *Dragoshi continues shooting The Book the fuck up.*
Chancé Lucent: "More tears of light!" *Targets: Dragoshi, self!*
The Book: "Oh, I would write a play... oh, I would like to say... you are just a bunch of nonsense creatures dancing on my page... why you think you have such rage... it is because I am the master sage."
Metal Man (GM): Hit, miss.
The Book: "Foe, you are ended!" He fires a laser at Chancé Lucent.
Chancé Lucent: "Mirror!" *shield breaker.*
Metal Man (GM): *Blam.*
The Book: "Ahah! Your weak spot is exposed!" He fires again at Chance`. It hits himself in the head. Oddly, you wonder if every person he's wounded also harmed him like this.
Chancé Lucent: "Heh, I thought it would absorb... this works too."
Dragoshi: "Yep."
The Book: "Bah! You will all die when I say so!" He summons one of Dr. Wily's old machines, then tries to crash it into all of you. Threatens all. Metal is hit by it, big time.
Chancé Lucent: "Oh come on!. (Metal is shielded.)" *thwacked by it.*
Dragoshi: *SHIELD BREAK.*
45 damage if hit. The Book: "Don't make me throw myself at you!"
Chancé Lucent: "Took him long enough to make a pun. Tears of light! Self, Dragoshi, and Metal!"
Metal Man (GM): The Book holds up a fist, and... The Book stands, most of its foes dead or dying. Indeed, only Dragoshi and Metal Man stand at the moment. Metal Man looks uncertain.
Metal Man: "I have fought horrible abominations and been through the worst of things, but this is the first monster to have more stamina than I. I do not know how much we can do even with our powers now... how I wish we had all those shiny god-like powers right now..."
The Book: "Hah! You refused those willingly! That is why you will all die. You didn't listen to the master plan! Nobody did! So now... they shall all be dead so I can run the show alone!"
Metal Man (GM): *WARP WARP WARP* Aiden, Julian, and Aribar appear, with their full health and 3 lives.
The Book: "Oh... shooot!"
Dragoshi: "...Nice timing, you three."
The Book: "Welll..." He shakes his head. Some pages fall out. "I'll KILL ALL OF YOU TOO!!!"
Julian: *SUPRISE* "Yo."
Metal Man (GM): Metal Man limps to the side and falls over.
Dragoshi: "Right, right. Fat lot of good you've done with that promise" *you've *that.
Metal Man: "I'm too worn out to go any further. You kill him. I'll make sure we can get out of here when you're finished."
Metal Man (GM): THE FINAL BATTLE: FINAL VERSE.
Aribar warps in, sword already in hand.* "Apologies for being a bit late... It looks like we could have had better timing."
Julian: "So we're fightin' a book... thing?"
Metal Man: "It's a strange book which is responsible for how things got messed up in our realm. Apparently all was fine until the events themselves gained their own avatar..."
The Book: "Hmph! You don't appreciate the exquisite order! Denon, Tridus, Eggman, Tridus, Denon, Eggman, Eggman, Guy who looks like Eggman, Charles, Eggman is how it should always be!"
Metal Man (GM): The Book begins powering up. It is... now all your turns.
The Book: "Come at me all you want. I'll kill every sentient being that dares to defy my divine repetitions!"
Dragoshi: *Is about to say something, but consumes two mushrooms first. He then speaks.* "Oh, shut up, already!" *Dragoshi then proceeds to spit some acid right in The Book's eye/eye analogue. Or at least his face.*
Metal Man (GM): Miss.
Julian: "All I need to know." *Julian puts up his dukes.* "Your head gonna look real nice on my wall next to Charles'." *Julian then makes a lightning-fast lunge towards The Book, trying to land a rib(Spine?) shattering Liver Blow to the midsection!*
Metal Man (GM): Miss. Er, right. Hit.
The Book: "Your wall is gone, and Charles... " He looks embarrassed. "I sort of destroyed the last piece of him after I erased the wall."
Aribar: "And if you kill all of your readers, who will read you?" *The elf rushes up to the book, the wind picking up around the mage with every step and he forms the gale into numerous blades. Aribar unleashes a barrage of slices to cut up the pages and blow them away!*
The Book: "Made a good weapon for five minutes, though."
Julian: *Julian then goes for a grab to the Book's non-existent collar...*
The Book: "I don't care. You and Kuja alike! I don't need any readers!"
Julian_Metal Man (GM): Hit, miss. Actually, the book is human-like--and has a very frilly, papery collar. Hit.
Dragoshi: "...Ten coins says you'll go insane without any readers if you win."
Julian: *Julian makes the grab and takes a mighty vertical leap! Gravity kicks in, and Julian puts the Book under him and rides him into the ground! Air Sawyer for 15 dmg.*
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi's turn.
Dragoshi: *Nothing interesting here. Just shootin' up The Book, bossman. <_>*
Metal Man (GM): Hit, Hit The Book ruffles his sleeves.
The Book: "I may be beaten up, but that doesn't stop me from doing this!" He holds his hands up, creating... a gigantic X-zone sphere. "X-Zoneaja!"
Dragoshi: .oO(...Now he's just making stuff up.)
Metal Man (GM): The Sphere suddenly flashes violently. Time is splintered as you warp back and forth between the X-zone and reality, flying through various climactic scenes in the past and crashing into things in them before arriving where you are now. Except now you're surrounded by the pieces of those... scenes? Threatens all.
Julian: "The fu-" *Trying not to die.*
Metal Man (GM): *BLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM* 90 damage to Julian.
Aribar: "Oh piffle..." *The elf tries in vain to dodge the attack.*
Metal Man (GM): 120 damage to Aribar. The Book kneels from the effort. He appears to be preparing anew.
Dragoshi: *SHIELD BREAK.*
The Book: "Next time I'll get you for good!"
Julian: *Julian does NOT appreciate being BLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM'd. Activate: Gazelle Punch Trio! GOGOGOGOGOGOOO.*
Aribar is in a great deal of pain right now... He quickly downs two Mushrooms and prepares for his next course of action.*
Metal Man (GM): Hit miss hit.
The Book: "Finally met your match, Julian? I am the most powerful being ever to exist!!!"
Julian: "It's a shame. People keep sayin' that, and I gotta keep provin' 'em wrong." *Backs up to the group after punching the hell out of Book.* "Think they'd learn by now."
Aribar gathers the electrical energies from the air around him before releasing it in a powerful blast. The elf rockets into the Book before conjuring more windy blades to take advantage of the close quarters to devastate their enemy.
Metal Man (GM): Miss, hit.
Dragoshi: *Attempts to Aerodrill The Book then follow up by shooting it in the face. Whee.*
Metal Man (GM): Hit, hit.
The Book: "You keep on picking at me with your puny attacks. You'll never win!"
Metal Man (GM): (Describing for new fighters)The Book. It's a book, in the shape of a person. It's the evil avatar of the shoddy plot. It's nearly dead.
Aiden attacks the book with a high speed wind cutter.
Metal Man (GM): Hit. AThe Book is full of rips now. Trembling, he summons his last items. ...You can hardly believe it. It's come full circle. The Max Up. The Move necklace.
Julian: *Aw HELL naw.*
The Book: "I thought I'd never have to use these... oh well!"
Aribar: "Oh... Piffle."
The Book: "The X Zone was a fad... Kuja left before I could use his best technique... with The Void dead and VG AWOL, I can't use Armageddon... and Gerald Robotnik outsmarted me with his insane time travel... And Charles... he was too fragile a weapon. So this... this is your end, Questers!"
Aribar: "How can you hope to beat us with trials we've already faced?"
The Book: "Because I am all those trials... plus one!" He puts on the items.
Julian: "Jus' shoot it off, already."
The Book: "And now... for Falcon... PUNPUNPUNPUNPUNPUNPUNPUNPUNPUNPUNNNNN!!!!!" He flies around like a madman, hurling hundreds of Falcon Punches. Yet he never seems to stop, falling over sideways after this... He's getting progressively stronger. You begin to see why. In the massive snow drift of discarded pages was many contradicting passages. Now that he is at his last gasp, he possesses the most powerful weapon of all--the original narrative.
Aribar flies off into the sunset, minus one life now.*
Julian: *Julian LIVES!*
Dragoshi: *Dragoshi also lives. But barely, though. e_e.*
Metal Man (GM): The Book is still flaming from his attacks, the Max-up burnt into his fist.
The Book: "Wha? Objects of power have consequences? Impossible!"
Dragoshi: "It's more likely than you think!"
Julian: *Julian's still standing!* "'Zat all you got? 'Most powerful being to ever exist' my ass!" *Julian moves in close... AND.*
Metal Man (GM): Hit. He dodges.
Julian_The Book: "I'll rip your words out of my arms and stuff them into your mouth!" He begins freaking out, then runs up to Julian, hurling exploding words at his face.
Julian: *Oh come fucking ON.*
Metal Man (GM): Julian is blown up by The Book, who, red in his eyes, leaps upwards and tries to body slam Dragoshi.
Julian: *KO!!*
Metal Man (GM): *BLAM.*
Dragoshi: *And, so that's the last life. Can't say I didn't see that one coming.*
Metal Man (GM): He dusts himself off, his arms smoking.
The Book: "Ain't nothin' without me behind you, Questers!" The world begins to fade and crack. The Book's insanity is damaging even this sanctum.
Aiden: "Who is this again?"
The Book: "I am the world! I am the place you traipsed in for a time. And I'm going to kill YOU for being with these people who wished to leave me! And I am nearly cleansed... soon I shall live in true peace." His crooked face appears to be slowly disintegrating. Ink is oozing from his many wounds, atonal music echoing in the air around him. Vague numbers around him indicate he is very powerful. Yet in all that he says and does, he seems to lack... a brain.
Aiden: "Yea yea... this is starting to annoy me." He rushes toward the book again pulling out Horrti and Durandal sending two sword waves in his stead. And as he arrives meets those sword waves pulling out his third blade. "Just go away already -.o."
Metal Man (GM): Miss, hit, miss.
Aiden: *two sword waves and a windcutter .*
Metal Man (GM): He's lookin' weak now.
The Book shakes his head in disgust. "You're too intelligent to be in my story! Die!" He pulls Sardis Mongul out of himself and begins trying to beat Aiden with him. Additionally, he... can't do anything else, the others aren't alive yet!
Aribar comes back to the battlefield.* "Ugh... That hurt. I commend the rest of you for lasting so long... He tries once more to unleash a barrage of windy slices to devastate the Book!"
Metal Man (GM): Miss, hit. The Book looks to Aribar and shakes his head.
The Book: "You've died far too often for me to kill you again." He... stands there.
Aribar: "... Low blow."
Julian: *And Julian's back up on his feet. Wasting no-time, Julian goes back on the attack with a Gazelle Punch Trio! Fear the lunge!*
Metal Man (GM): Ok, there we go. Hit, hit, hit. The Book holds up a fist, but it crumbles. He is not miffed.
Julian: "How you like me NOW?"
The Book: "You fools thought you could kill me? Idiots." He takes out a pen and writes something. His arm comes back to life. "I simply thought that it'd be more sporting to kill you with weapons than words. But if you insist... the pen is mightier than all of you put together!" A gigantic omni-weight appears over all of you, ready to fall. He goes to write one last word... *Snap.* "...I knew I should have brought a spare." He tosses the busted pen over his shoulder. "You wait here while I make a new one!" The pen he dropped... it looks shiny. Almost... remote like.
Aribar: "... This is slightly anticlimactic." *Steps out from under the weight.*
Julian: *Yoink.*
The Book turns around, with a new pen. A mundane one. The Book: "Now... you die!" He writes something, and once again he is really super-powered looking.
Metal Man: "Quick! Use the remote!"
Metal Man (GM): Julian: The remote has a million buttons... you can't tell what they do.
Julian: *:O*
Metal Man (GM): The Book hurls a massive couch. It misses your head by an inch.
Aribar: "Press someth--gahmaneatingcouch!"
The Book: "All it takes is one throw and you're finished."
Julian: "Uh..." *Presses the button at the very top while pointing it at the Book! Maybe it's the power button.*
Metal Man (GM): You press the button. *CLICK* ...The words the Book just wrote on his sleeve wear off.

BOOOOOOOOM


The Book: "Oh... sh---" A white flash fills the area and... who knows what happens after that?
Julian: *JULIAN. IS. ALWAYS. RIGHT.*
Metal Man (GM): There is little else to say here; until... an epilogue?
Nick Caligo (GM): Your senses begin to return to you slowly. It's windy here. Windy and warm. Though you feel no wind on your skin, you hear it... outside. The climate here, though, is almost like being in a cave. A musty scent greets you, like the furniture of eternity.
Aribar looks about, a little confused...* "What's... Going on?"
Julian: *This cave be hella dank.* "Damned if I know..."
Nick Caligo (GM): Finally, your eyes begin to slide open, blurry vision coming into focus as you catch sight of a pair of boots against the black stone floor. It isn't a cave, you realize, as the light shines in from a few cracks in the walls and from a knothole directly above you, pouring in almost like water. Unless you count caves made entirely of wood.
Metal Man: "Last time I ride a lawnmower into a hardware store..."
Dragoshi: "...Not gonna ask."
Nick Caligo (GM): "Ah," a familiar, perniciously smooth voice greets you. "You've awakened."
Aribar tries to look about towards the voice.*
Nick Caligo (GM): It becomes all too clear where you are now. Well. In a sense...
Julian: *Who the fu-...*
Nick Caligo (GM): Kuja's study. You know because Kuja's the one looking down at you, and it seems he's got his own desk and has littered the place with parchment and shelves and shelves of books. Julian would be drooling presently on a treatise on worlds and hearts. Looks like a bunch of pseudoscientific gibberish.
Metal Man: "Aha! You were behind it! I knew it! ...Then again, that didn't seem very planned."
Aribar simply stares at Kuja, his mouth hanging slightly open... The Whallerian has no clue what's going on.*
Dragoshi: "...That's because it probably wasn't."
Kuja: "Don't thank me too soon," he laughs, tossing his hair haughtily.
Julian: "...What in the blue hell-How'd we get HERE? Of all places?!" *Julian peels the treatise off his face as he gets up.*
Kuja: "Allow me to explain what your simple minds can't seem to comprehend..." He steps over to a tome, sitting on its own altar, spread wide open... it looks like The Book, albeit... with much more elaborate, decorative binding.
Metal Man: "Gah! Oh... wait... it's not alive and hurling cliches at me."
Dragoshi: "Yep."
Kuja: "Since I'm sure all of this hum-drum about dimensions and space-time would be lost on your pathetically stupid brains, I shall try to explain this... in layman's terms. First, how you came to be my guests here." He flips a few of the blank pages, eyeing the book suspiciously as though giving an autopsy. "Your world, as I'm sure you've come to suspect, was not entirely natural." He thumbs through another page. "Call it... an amalgamation, if you will, of many possible worlds. Quite real, but quite... unstable. A story created by many minds from those many worlds and beyond." Kuja steps away from the book and brazes his hand along the shelves and shelves of tomes that line the walls inside this colossal tree. "Stories, though, sometimes have a way of escaping their writers' vision... they take on a life of their own." He looks to you directly. "Such was the case of the story of your world."
Metal Man: "Hm... interesting."
Kuja: "You would think," he goes on, "That a story so powerful it could create a world for people to live in would be so much more resilient than that. Nothing is permanent, though... even words carved in stone can be erased. The device you found can be thought of as the pen that was used to write it. When you hit that button, you effectively erased all the words on the book's pages. Those stories are now no more. You have done what countless villains and dark forces couldn't and destroyed your world."
Aribar: "W... w... what?"
Julian: "So, wait... aw shit."
Kuja: "As such," he goes on, "I used my power to bring you here."
Dragoshi: "...Well, then."
Kuja: "This," he gestures all around at the inside of this tree, rather palace-like, "Is my world. One of many that became a part of yours."
Metal Man: "Well, I guess Julian isn't always right." *Pats Julian on the back.* "...Too bad it couldn't have been over something less dangerous, like sandwiches."
Kuja: "I," he says, "Cannot claim responsibility for the original penmanship of this book, but I can claim some responsibility for the nature of it..."
Metal Man looks up a bit. "...Dang. Julian did what The Void never could do."
Dragoshi: "Yep." :/ .oO(It's... almost of kind of funny when you think about it.)
Nick Caligo (GM): He walks over to it again, resting his hands on either side of it.
Kuja: "You see, that device you used was the very thing that I was seeking from the moment I entered your world... my fate in this one is... grim, I assure you. So I sought a way to change it." He brushes his fingers delicately over the surface of the book. "If I could enter the book and re-write it... I felt I could make my ending a happier one."
Aribar continues to listen to Kuja while trying to digest this whole story.*
Kuja: "I hastened the convergence of your worlds and brought mine into its pages with what power I had, but the Pen eluded me endlessly... I scoured your world, conquered it... even thrust you into another so that you wouldn't interfere, and STILL I never found it, STILL you always returned to stop me. So I simply decided to wait... until now." He stands up. "When you would bring it to me!" He whirls around quickly, thrusting the shiny pen up into the air while a devilish grin breaks across his face.
Metal Man: "Funny, I thought it was destroyed. Then again, that blinding white flash impaired visibility for an awful long time..."
Julian: "So now what?"
Aiden yawns. "I'm a time-knight for christ sakes." While all this talking is going on he's just updating his temporal log for clarity in this current case.
Aribar: "Now he holds all of the cards."
Metal Man: "But as The Book showed us, that doesn't mean much when you're us. Although he could probably prevent whatever end he speaks of over here with it."
Kuja: "Unfortunately, this pen isn't the only thing needed to re-write the book." He tosses his hair again. "To complete this little circle, I need you."
Metal Man: "You need me?" He raises an eyebrow... which nobody except a midget at his knee height would see. "Now... that is interesting."
Kuja: "The book is empty. A blank world. Lifeless too, though it can obtain a new life. With your memories, you may use this opportunity..." he sits down, dipping the pen in an ink well briefly, "... to re-write the book however you wish, and rebuild your lost world. So tell me," he asks, looking over his shoulder, the sinister look having left his eyes as he smiles knowingly. "How shall we begin?"
Metal Man: "Well." He looks around a bit. "That's a tall order... I'll have to think, as it seems as if the last word inherited some of my insanity. And I wouldn't want to cause that in this one..."
And with that, the first Super Smash Quest had ended.

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