Super Smash Quest - Story - Chapter 65: Bob, Lord of Electric Death

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Date: July 17th, 2004.
Metal Man (GM): The Questers are at HQ, as usual.
Yurie is eating lunch, as usual.
Metal Man (GM): It's kind of a warm day. Metal has just finished filing some paperwork.
Pat sits in his newly-cleaned room, writing some stuff.
Metal Man: "Hmmmm... still a lot of work ahead, but once I've organized the precise statistics of every member, I should get a vacation."
Razor sits down slowly near Yurie, raising an eyebrow. "What'cha got there?"
Aribar is sitting in the R&R having difficulties putting some cubes into his sword. Curse only having one hand!
Metal Man: "Hmmmm... maybe we could do a holo-mission."
Yurie: *mmfm...* *swallow.* "Chili-cheeseburger." ^^ "So, whatcha want?"
Metal Man: "Well, let's see. Aribar, are you interested in trying a holomission? Oh. Well, I've programmed a holomission."
Aribar looks up. "Huh? Sure."
Razor chuckles softly, cradling a small glass filled with a golden liquid in his hands. "That a fact? Sounds delicious..." He tilts his head back and downs part of the glass. He gulps it down and sets the glass back down. "I was watching you on that last mission. You've got some real talent."
Metal Man: "I can't give you real items or money, but it should give you plenty of experience."
Yurie rolls her eyes slightly at that point, then sets down her burger.
Aribar finally manages to put two more cubes in his weapon before sheathing it and standing up from the couch. "Sounds like a good excuse for some exercise."
Yurie: "Thanks. Considering I used to be a professional fencer..."
Razor nods quickly. "Yes... would you mind if I took a look at that sword of yours for a moment?"
Yurie shrugs, then unclips her rapier from her belt and hands it over with both hands.
Razor slowly takes the sword with grace... obvious he's handled swords before. He looks it over for a moment. "Yes... very nice..." His eyes trail to the two cubes inserted in it, and the empty slot. "Hmmm..." A hand grips the hilt as he reaches down into one of the pouches on his belt and pulls out a very nice looking cube. He hands her the sword back, along with the cube. "Try putting this in there... you'll find it will help. It'll help a lot. That blade will be able to cut enemies to ribbons."
Metal Man goes to the holoroom. All the Smash Dexes would announce that a holo-mission was available.
Aribar follows Metal.
Yurie: "...?" *looks over the glowing blue-grey cube, then clips it in, linking with he other two: the clear cube with a small sword suspended in the center, and the translucent red cube with a lack half-circle suspended in it.
Razor (GM): --Yurie has received Maximize Cube!--
Yurie: "...I think we're being paged..." *opens her dex and scans the message...*
Dex: "A Holo-mission is available in Holo-room B."
Razor pulls out his Dex and flips it open. "Yeah... holo-mission... looks like you get to put that new cube to good use... let's go." He stands up slowly and moves to the door, waiting for her.
Yurie shrugs, then reattaches her rapier and follows, humming softly as her skirt swishes lightly.
Pat is hungry. He decides to walk down the hall and get some food, when he sees Metal in Holoroom B.
Dr. Donez continues to sleep on the floor in the corner of the room. He doesn't have a dex since they're too big. (?)
Razor of course, has those same grayish Power Shot cubes he had before, but the second cubes in his gloves are black as night. His Tribal Armor on his torso contains a purple-blue cube, and a cube just like the one he gave Yurie. He turns and walks with her to the holo room, his cloak, tattered from many years of use, flowing gently behind him, giving glimpses of his feathery wings.
Pat: "Hey Metal, Holomission?"
Metal Man: "Yes. A desert one."
Yurie: "Lovely... at least I won't get any sand in my shoes... not real sand at least."
Pat: "That's cool... is that Donez sleeping on the floor out there?"
Metal Man sets it up, and pokes Donez.
Dr. Donez begins to blink.
Razor shakes his head. "Joy... desert... bet it's not as hot as some of the places I've been..."
Metal Man: "Now... this should get us there quick..." *Presses a big red button.*
Metal Man (GM): *WARP.*
Dr. Donez: "*YYYAAWWNN*...Is it time for breakfast?"
Pat is warped.
Metal Man (GM): The Questers appear in a desert... even though behind them is the exit to the holo room. The sky is blue, and it's an endless desert.
Yurie: "...I'll never get used to that..." @.@
Metal Man (GM): The wind blows sand everywhere, but not enough to annoy people.
Pat: "This desert looks endless..."
Dr. Donez: "!! I don't belong here! I belong back at wherever Fred signed me up for!!"
Yurie: "...you're stating the obvious again..."
Metal Man (GM): A large, blue fortress is right ahead.
Metal Man: "...Which would be here, Donez."
Pat: "...Shut up, Yurie."
Metal Man (GM): The fortress has two guards in front of it.
Aribar blinks and looks at the door then to Donez. "Aah... We'll protect you Dr. Do--... Little masked bird."
Yurie: "...so... what's the point of the mission?"
Dr. Donez: "...A desert is not the place where I was sleeping."
Metal Man: "We must enter that fortress and find the hidden treasure chest."
Yurie frowns, then leans down, picks the birdy up, and stows him in her inventory...
Dr. Donez: "Hey... what are you--*mmooing...*"
Metal Man (GM): Donez is now stuck inside Yurie's inventory... but he doesn't quite fit. His head pops out of Yurie's pack.
Dr. Donez: *POP!*
Razor blinks a few times at Yurie and Donez. "..."
Dr. Donez: "Ahh, that's better."
Pat: "Yo, Donez, What's up?"
Metal Man: "Anyways... I guess we go forward." *walks towards the great fortress.*
Yurie: "Now, as I was saying Metal... what's the point of this mission?"
Dr. Donez: "Apparently this kidnapper made me go up."
Aribar chuckles a bit and heads towards the fortress.
Yurie shrugs, then follows.
Metal Man: "Find the hidden treasure chest inside the fortress."
Pat: "So it would seem." *Follows.*
Metal Man: "In the center of it."
Razor cracks his knuckles and follows the party.
Yurie: "Yee-hah... going into a fake fortress with fake guards after a fake chest with fake treasure."
Metal Man: "Yeah... well... they act real."
Dr. Donez: "Yet you stand here and I am to stay stuffed in your bookbag in a hot desert."
Guard 1: "Halt! You have seen the immortal fortress of blue!"
Guard 2: "You must be executed!"
Metal Man (GM): They each draw swords.
Yurie: "And cue the dramatic battle music!" *draws her sword.*
Aribar: "... We're not looking at it!"
Dr. Donez: "Now I haven't! I..I..I aaa... am just sight seeing!"
Metal Man pulls out his gun.
Dr. Donez: "I haven't even seen this... castle!"
Guard 1: "You are staring at it right now, infidel!"
Dr. Donez: "Back here, nitwit!"
Guard 1: "It is too late. There is no escape!"
Guard 2: "You shall die really fast!"
Yurie Charges Guard 1, then thrusts her sword forwards at the guard's chest, the blade glowing brightly as she activates Power Strike.
Guard 1: "You pathetic attack-OW!" *is hit.*
Yurie: *CRACKOOM!*
Dr. Donez: "Bbbll... blll... please... not so... fast."
Metal Man (GM): He's hit.
Dr. Donez: "Is he gone?"
Yurie: "Apparently not..."
Guard 1: " You shall pay for that! Taste the power of the desert!"
Dr. Donez: "I've already tasted it! It tastes like sand."
Metal Man (GM): Guard 1 points his sword at Yurie, and a large cone of blowing sand flies at her.
Yurie: *EVASION!*
Metal Man (GM): No damage, and Yurie is not blown away.
Guard 1: "My attack fails! I am one large failure!"
Dr. Donez: @_@ "...I... feel woozy..."
Yurie leaps and twirls effortlessly out of the way of the blast and lands with a ta-tap, her sword in ready position.
Guard 2: "I shall defeat the infidel! Sand, destroy her!"
Metal Man (GM): Guard 2 launches the same attack at Yurie.
Dr. Donez: "You haven't failed making me nauseous, you big... bully!"
Yurie: *EVASION!*
Metal Man (GM): Once again, evasion. And no blowing away.
Guard 2: "She is too fast!"
Dr. Donez: "But she's using attacks that make me...*buurrppp.*."
Yurie does much the same maneuver, landing once again, ever so gracefully, her skirt/duster fluttering.
Metal Man (GM): They both glow for some weird reason.
Yurie: "...Donez, you release any bodily fluids at me, and I'll throw YOU at them next."
Razor digs his feet into the ground, holding up his gloved hands. "You're in the way... Death Barrage!" His hands are engulfed in black energy as he clenches them into fists, sending a multitude of black bolts at them.
Dr. Donez: "I'll... hold it in... kidnapper."
Metal Man (GM): 3 hits on the first guy. The second guy dodges all.
Razor: *FAILURE.*
Guard 1: "I am a laughing stock!" *EXPLODES.*
Guard 2: "...Nooo! I shall avenge my brother!"
Dr. Donez: "Avenge my stomach and I'll give you some candy in return, Mr. Guardian."
Guard 2: "Call off the attackers first!"
Aribar extends his sword towards the guard. He yells, "Thordain!" as several balls of electrical energy surround him. They soon explode creating a shockwave around him.
Yurie: <.<
Guard 2: "AHHHH!"
Metal Man (GM): He only takes half damage.
Guard 2: "You call that an attack? I mock you!"
Aribar: "Hrm..."
Dr. Donez: "I call it blindness because I'm making a mockery of a Rareware game."
Pat braces himself on the ground. His gauntlets blaze with searing flame, as he leaps forward and pummels Guard 2 in the face.
Metal Man (GM): *KA-PUNCHA.* He takes half damage.
Guard 2: "You burn my robe! You shall pay!"
Aribar: "Pay he shall?"
Yurie: "...oh shut up..."
Metal Man: "I'll finish this joker off."
Yurie: "Yes, please do..."
Metal Man: "Radio BOOOOOOOOOOOM!" *Throws a Radio at the guy.*
Pat cries inwardly.
Guard 2: "AHHHHHH!!! "*Avoids.*
Dr. Donez: "Please! Before this female specimen moves again!"
Metal Man (GM): He's still alive.
Yurie: "...Aribar, be kind enough to zappify this guy?"
Aribar: "Time to die! Thordain!"
Guard 2: "I am unzappifyable! NOOOOOO!!!" *EXPLODE.*
Yurie: "Nice shot."
Metal Man (GM): He explodes, and the door opens. It's like a HUGE grocery store door.
Yurie sheathes her rapier.
Dr. Donez: "YYYYEEESSS!" Donez tries to swing out of the bag.
Metal Man (GM): Inside, it's air conditioned. Donez flies out of Yurie's bag.
Aribar: "It feels good to have some of my old magic back..." *He begins to head inside after sheathing his sword.*
Razor raises an eyebrow. "I'm not complaining..." He steps inside.
Yurie grrs and nabs Donez.
Metal Man heads inside.
Dr. Donez struggles around.
Metal Man (GM): Inside, there is a large steel door in the way.
Yurie: "...alright, you little bird... listen closely... if you help us out..I'll buy you some pretzels..big ones."
Dr. Donez: "Noooo! I refuse to stay in that dinky bag of yours!"
Yurie follows the others as she chats.
Metal Man (GM): There are five slots.
Pat walks.
Metal Man (GM): ...And several little blocks, that fit into each one.
Yurie: brb.
Razor blinks again the door, then at the blocks.
Aribar hrms and looks closely at the blocks and slots.
Metal Man (GM): A red, green, blue, yellow, purple, orange, violet, pink, teal, brown, and black and white one. 5 slots. 12 blocks.
Razor looks REAL closely at the slots.
Metal Man (GM): Each slot fits one block. There are no traps in them.
Dr. Donez hops where they are.
Aribar: "What to do..." *He mumbles.*
Metal Man (GM): Also, each slot will not release a block. No markings.
Dr. Donez: "Lemme see! I wanna see what's happening!"
Razor grunts. "Joy... no clues..."
Metal Man: "Hmmm... guess we'll just have to try guessing?"
Razor stops. "Wait! I've got it!"
Aribar: "Already?"
Dr. Donez: "I have an idea as well, little man."
Razor: "Try using Black, Yellow, Pink, Green, and Red."
Aribar: "Any reasons why?" *He begins to pick up said blocks.*
Dr. Donez: "Obviously, the only way to do this is to put in the blocks that are the lightest of them all."
Razor: "Maybe it has something to do with those big annoyances we fought earlier?"
Aribar hrms and puts in the blocks that Razor said, stopping if anyone tells him to.
Metal Man (GM): Aribar puts the first block in. A klaxon sounds.
Razor: "Hope... that wasn't order specific..."
Metal Man (GM): A robot drops from the ceiling, armed with dual machineguns.
Aribar: "Gak! What is that?"
Robot: "Trespassers. Prepare to die."
Dr. Donez: "AHH! A robot from the depths of upper heck!"
Razor: "Obviously another annoyance."
Pat: "OH MY GOD ITS A ROBOT! AAAH!"
Dr. Donez swooshes to Metal's head. "I'll be safe up here."
Metal Man: "...Right."
Razor raises his hands into the air, which glow orange before he lowers them in front of them. "Eat fire!" He launches a cone of Bowser's Inferno at him.
Dr. Donez gets out a small bottle and squeezes some of the contents around his feet and onto Metal's head.
Metal Man: "...Uhhh... that stuff might make you slip off..."
Razor: "Well... that didn't work as well as I had hoped..."
Dr. Donez: "Pshaw! It's a glue specifically used to stick organisms to to metal."
Metal Man: "...Well, that's great."
Dr. Donez: "...I just hope that I remember how to remove it later on."
Pat lets his fists explode with fire, and pummels them into... the thing they're fighting.
Metal Man: "Yeah..."
Pat: "W00t."
Metal Man (GM): Half damage again.
Pat: "Er..."
Dr. Donez: "By how the way the air's moving, I'd say you're about to attack the robot next."
Metal Man: "...Yeah... most likely."
Dr. Donez: "I've been observing this small circular thing that's been moving around people... And I theorize it indicates who would strike next."
Metal Man: "A.ha..."
Dr. Donez: "See? It's above you right now!"
Metal Man fires off a Tri-beam. Three different colored runes... blah blah blah attack the robot.
Metal Man (GM): Half damage as well.
Robot: "...Overload..." *EXPLODE.*
Metal Man (GM): The robot explodes.
Aribar: "These things are quite resistant to our attacks... Well... Someone." *Winces as the robot explodes.*
Metal Man (GM): The block falls out of the slot.
Metal Man: "...Well, hopefully this time we get it right."
Dr. Donez winces as well hoping a part wont hit him."
Metal Man (GM): No parts hit

DR. DONEZ!


Metal Man (GM): In fact, they disappear before touching anyone.
Dr. Donez: "This is most definitely a phenomenon... why would matter suddenly disappear like that?"
Razor: "Well... what is it then? Aribar, you're the smart one... figure it out!"
Metal Man: "...Probably because it's a simulation."
Aribar: "I... Hrm..."
Dr. Donez: "...Then why is it I'm still stuck to your head?"
Metal Man: "...I don't know."
Metal Man (GM): Aribar determines the right combination is definitely an order. Of the names. Not of the hues.
Dr. Donez: "Doofus..."
Metal Man (GM): And he deduces that the white and black blocks are meant just to confuse people.
Aribar: "Hrm... I think that the black and white blocks are just here to confuse us..."
Dr. Donez: "Can we hurry this along, elfboy? I have Executrains to beat up, Ice picks to polish, a world to dominate..."
Aribar looks back. "You're a doctor... Doctors are smart... YOU figure this out then!"
Razor blinks a few times. "This is all very confusing..." He turns to Donez, then back to Aribar. "Umm... no..."
Dr. Donez: "I already have."
Metal Man: "What is it?"
Dr. Donez: "Obviously, the colors that do not pose a threat are the ones we should use."
Razor: "I KNOW this isn't going to end well... Aribar... don't listen to him... please..."
Dr. Donez: "It's so simple, even Mario would've figured it out!"
Pat: "Which colors pose a threat?"
Dr. Donez: "..."
Aribar tosses the black and white blocks at Donez.
Dr. Donez: "Uhhhhh... OW! YEOW!! I'm gonna peck you for that, ya little punk!"
Aribar: "You're glued to Metal's head! Now..."
Dr. Donez: "Just you wait till I get off this metal body."
Aribar: "Maybe... We use the first letter of each color to spell something?"
Dr. Donez: "Anyways, the ones that don't pose a threat are the ones that are light in color."
Pat: "Lets just do each color randomly."
Metal Man just walks over and opens the iron door.
Aribar: "... ."
Metal Man: "...Uhhhhh..."
Aribar: "Why didn't we think of that?"
Dr. Donez: "..."
Razor shakes his head.
Dr. Donez: "Because you're as smart as a lemming."
Aribar tosses the red cube at Donez.
Dr. Donez: "...and twice as tall... ow!"
Metal Man: "Okay... next time, we make sure the door is locked before playing with random blocks."
Aribar sighs and begins forward, sword unsheathed.
Metal Man (GM): Up ahead, is a large stairway.
Dr. Donez: "Agreed, now let's get going before junior throws more kid's blocks at me. *blocks."
Metal Man (GM): It leads to the second story.
Aribar: "How about a fireball next?"
Metal Man (GM): There are two stairways.
Razor moves on up.
Metal Man (GM): Left or right.
Dr. Donez: "I say we go right."
Aribar: "Then I say left!"
Pat: "Right."
Metal Man: "Left is right?"
Pat: "No, I say we go right."
Dr. Donez: "At least one of you listens to me, the GREAT..."

DR. DONEZ!


Metal Man (GM): The camera hits everyone in the face.
Razor looks back to Donez. "You say go right? Okay... I'm going left!" He rubs his nose and walks up the stairs on the left.
Aribar: "Oof! I'm gonna steal that mask and break it!" *follows Razor.*
Metal Man (GM): Razor goes up the left set of stairs without problem. Aribar is hit by flame jets and sent to the bottom of the stairs.
Aribar: "AAAAAAAH!!!!!!!"
Dr. Donez: "I've learned one vital thing in my life and that's if we go right, then surely the level will end sooner!"
Metal Man (GM): Garrick magically appears.
Garrick: "Hey, sorry I'm late... what are we doing this time?"
Metal Man (GM): The left one just burnt Ari a bit. The right one hasn't been tried.
Metal Man: "...Just trying to get to a treasure chest at the center of this fortress."
Aribar: "Finding treasure in this fort of doom."
Pat walks right.
Dr. Donez: "The losers are trying to decide if they want to become BBQ'ed or not."
Aribar watches Pat.
Metal Man (GM): Pat takes no damage, but is forced down to the bottom of the steps to avoid being burnt.
Garrick goes up the right set of steps then right after Pat.
Metal Man (GM): Garrick gets up those steps without trouble.
Pat: "Hmm." *runs down and grabs some cubes.*
Aribar walks back up left steps right up until he was burnt down.
Metal Man (GM): More damage to Aribar and he is thrown to the bottom. Pat has all of the blocks.
Aribar: "Gah..."
Razor makes it to the top of the stairs. "What's taking you guys!?!"
Pat walks back up to the split.
Dr. Donez: "Idiot! Why not just listen to me?"
Aribar: "Fire!"
Metal Man (GM): Razor and Garrick are at the top of the stairs.
Pat tosses three consecutive blocks up the left steps.
Metal Man (GM): The first one is not burnt. The second one is. The third one is not burnt.
Pat sets down all blocks except one, which he throws.
Metal Man (GM): That one is also burnt.
Pat walks up steps.
Metal Man (GM): Pat gets up without a problem.
Aribar: "..."
Garrick: "See the pattern?"
Aribar picks up a block and throws it up the left steps.
Metal Man (GM): It is burnt.
Aribar dashes up the steps.
Metal Man (GM): Aribar gets up.
Dr. Donez: "Obviously, the stairs don't like the elf."
Metal Man just shrugs and walks up the right stairs.
Dr. Donez: "He was burnt twice in a row."
Metal Man (GM): Everyone is at the top. ...There's another door ahead, but 3 of those guards and 2 of those robots are in the way.
Guard 1: "You glimpse inside the temple! You die now!"
Pat: "No!"
Guard 2: "You have stepped through our trap! You cannot live!"
Dr. Donez: "Let me handle it this time..."
Pat: "I don't wanna! You can't make me!"
Guard 3: "You will die really fast!"
Pat: "No I won't!"
Robot 1: "Destroy. Intruders."
Razor shakes his head slowly. "Let's kill them, shall we?"
Garrick: "Can somebody just kill them now?"
Robot 2: "Protect. Guards."
Metal Man (GM): The guards pull out swords.
Dr. Donez: "We aren't intruders... we're... uhh..."
Metal Man (GM): And the robots get into attack position.
Dr. Donez: "...stone inspectors."
Guard 1: "Inspectors of death?"
Guard 2: "I have no stones for you!"
Garrick: "...did you just say stone inspectors?"
Pat: "Yes. We're here to see how many people have died this month."
Guard 3: "Inspector Stone?"
Razor: "You have no stones? I feel for you..."
Garrick: *rimshot.*
Guard 1: "Died? You will have to count yourselves!"
Guard 2: "Prepare to die!"
Guard 3: "Die now!"
Garrick: "Oh, I'm sick of this..."
Aribar: "... Look! Red spies in the fort!"
Guard 1: "Look at your death!"
Dr. Donez: "Just kill them all with a big blast or something so we don't waste time..."
Guard 2: "Die!"
Aribar points behind the guards.
Guard 3: "More death!"
Garrick charges his buster...
Dr. Donez: "BEER!"
Razor lifts his gloves, which begin to radiate black energy.
Guard: "Beer and death!"
Garrick: "The Goodyear Blimp!"
Pat: "Or just beer!"
Guard 2: "Blimp death and beer!"
Guard 3: "Blimps and beer!"
Pat: "BLIMPS AND BEER! BLIMPS AND BEER!"
Razor: "..."
Pat: "OUTSIDE!"
Dr. Donez: "You see!? It was all just a big misunderstanding!"
Guard 1: "You have stolen the bear! You must blimp!"
Guard 2: "Where is the bear? Beer blimp to you!"
Pat: "The beer is outside, in the blump!"
Aribar: "... ...Gravy?"
Guard 3: "Gravy beer?"
Garrick: "You know, I think I know the solution to all of this..."
Dr. Donez: "Uhh... sure... It's downstairs..."
Guard 1: "I will blimp beer gravy you!"
Dr. Donez: "Just take a right when you're leaving."
Guard: "Vocabulary module malfunction."
Guard 3: "Beer death of blimp!"
Garrick: "Death blimp of beer, you mean."
Metal Man (GM): *BZZZZZZZZZZZZT.*
Dr. Donez: "Perhaps we should go now before they become any more dumbified..."
Metal Man (GM): They all short circuit and explode.
Aribar: "... ."
Pat: "Whoohoo!"
Razor: "..."
Aribar: "Ummm... ..."
Garrick: "Well, that was entertaining."
Aribar: "This never happened..." *He walks forward...*
Garrick clicks his buster off and heads onward toward the door.
Dr. Donez: "Yes! Reward me with a beautiful prize for beating up the baddies with words!"
Pat: "I helped too..."
Metal Man (GM): The Questers get to the door.
Dr. Donez: "Yes, you will be rewarded too."
Razor blinks... and walks forward.
Pat: "Yay!"
Metal Man: "Who should open the door?"
Pat walks forwardish. He opens the door.
Aribar: "The dumb bi--Okay, Patrick..."
Pat whimpers.
Metal Man (GM): Pat takes damage and is electrified by the door.
Pat: "Ouchies."
Dr. Donez: "..."
Garrick: "Okay, how about we just blow it open?"
Dr. Donez: "This is probably another one of those pattern things."
Metal Man: "Good idea."
Pat: "Wanna go back down and get the blocks, Donez?"
Aribar walks through the door.
Metal Man (GM): Aribar walks straight into the closed door. No effect... except *THUNK.*
Dr. Donez: "How about this? You go down so I don't hurt my legs from being glued atop this metal thing."
Garrick brings his buster, fully charged by the way, waits until Ari is out of the way, then blasts the door.
Metal Man (GM): Garrick's shot is reflected right back at him.
Razor raises an eyebrow. "Hmmm... I could... cheat it... you guys want to figure it out or not?"
Metal Man (GM): He is hit for half damage.
Aribar: "I wanna try one more thing..."
Dr. Donez: "A reflective barrier? You only see those things when you're close... to the boss... chamber?"
Aribar attempts to open the door.
Metal Man (GM): Aribar avoids being shocked. The door is locked.
Aribar: "... It is locked... Goodie..." *He stands back.*
Razor rolls his eyes. "Great..."
Garrick: "Anyone got a key?"
Garrick downs a mushroom.
Metal Man: "...How much I wish Sora was here."
Metal Man (GM): Garrick is healed some.
Dr. Donez: "There has to be like... a small duct. Overlords are usually stupid enough to make them large enough for someone to crawl through."
Metal Man (GM): Aribar sees an invisible door to the right of this door.
Pat makes use of Ultravision.
Aribar: "Ahh... The joys of elven vision..."
Metal Man (GM): Pat tunes in to television channels. Gotta love that FOX channel.
Pat: "..."
Aribar first walks over to Metal and attempts to steal Donez's mask, then heads to the invisible door to open it.
Metal Man (GM): Donez's mask is stuck to his face.
Aribar: "Grr... So much for trying to humiliate you... For now..."
Metal Man (GM): The invisible door opens. It reveals... a broom closet.
Garrick: "...why is Donez stuck to your head, Metal?"
Aribar: "HAH!"
Pat observes inside of broom closet.
Aribar: "I knew it... I knew I was a failure!"
Metal Man: "...Because he glued himself there."
Razor raises an eyebrow and looks around inside the closet.
Garrick: "...and why did he do that?"
Aribar sighs and hits his head against the nearest wall.
Metal Man (GM): Inside the closet is some sort of magic mirror. It's got a huge red button on it.
Razor: "Ooooo... button!" *He pushes the button.*
Dr. Donez: "Tell me; would you want to be stuck in a small backpack which belonged to a nimble female kidnapper?"
Garrick: "If the female was hot, yeah..."
Dr. Donez: "You wouldn't be able to see her though... And she was of a different species from you... then would you still?"
Garrick: "Ah, well, then I'd just blow her up." *holds up his buster covered hand.*
Metal Man (GM): The entire world turns into an inverse-world.
Pat: "What if you were a tiny little bird?"
Metal Man (GM): The Questers sees everything go inverse-colored.
Razor: "Whoa... it's just like College all over again!"
Metal Man (GM): The staircase is now upside down.
Dr. Donez: "AHHHRARHAHRHARHA..."
Aribar: "AAH! It is a Prismatic Sphere spell gone wrong!"
Pat: "Ah... finally, everything is right-side up."
Garrick: "No, it's more like Woodstock... I didn't particularly like those brownies..."
Metal Man (GM): ...And the ground the Questers used to be on is now the ceiling.
Garrick: "...ohhhh... crap..."
Dr. Donez: "... Deja Vu?"
Aribar looks at Donez... "AH! Blue and black demon!"
Metal Man (GM): Also, there's a tunner where that electro-shock door used to be.
Razor walks through the tunner.
Garrick also walks through the tunner.
Editor's Note: Yes, that was supposed to be 'tunnel', but everyone ran with it anyway.
Metal Man (GM): The Questers reach a large, open room.
Aribar follows the others.
Metal Man (GM): A huge treasure check full of riches in in there.
Metal Man: "...I guess we found it."
Aribar: "... Must resist urge to just dive into the treasure... ."
Pat tosses a cube at the treasure chest.
Metal Man (GM): The cube turns into a sphere.
Garrick: "That's got to be the most obvious trap in my life..."
Razor blinks. "Ooookay... hey Donez... why don't you open it?"
Metal Man (GM): The block turns into a sphere.
Pat: "Don't touch it! You'll change shape!"
Dr. Donez: "...Do that again."
Aribar: "... Bolt!" *He attempts to shock the treasure and explode any traps there... Hopefully.*
Razor: "Quiet you!"
Metal Man (GM): The chest opens from the electricity...
Pat tosses a block into the open chest.
Metal Man (GM): ...It's Dr. Robotnik's Eggmobile, with Dr. Robotnik.
Razor: "..."
Garrick: "...son of a..."
Dr. Donez: "Gasp!"
Pat: "Uh. Crud."
Dr. Robotnik: "Hah hah hah! You have fallen for my ultimate plan!"
Garrick: "...did you just say 'Gasp'?"
Metal Man: "Luckily, he's a simulation."
Razor: "Hey! You have to fix my gloves you punk! They can't hit jack!"
Pat: "...come back, block..."
Dr. Donez: "...no."
Dr. Robotnik: "I'll destroy you!"
Garrick: "Oh, okay then."
Metal Man (GM): Robotnik's eggmobile melds with the chest.
Dr. Donez: "Yaaa..destroy them for all I care."
Garrick: "Shut up, Donez..."
Dr. Donez: "I could care less."
Metal Man (GM): It morphs into a larger sphere, surrounded by floating spiked orbs. The block bounces off his shield.
Aribar: "... This is gonna hurt."
Dr. Robotnik: "I AM UNSTOPPABLE!"
Garrick: "I think we should just shoot him. Who wants to shoot him?"
Dr. Donez: "This seems familiar..."
Garrick: "No, you're Robotnik."
Dr. Robotnik: "... "
Metal Man (GM): *PROGRAM GLITCH.*
Dr. Donez: "Now where have I seen this before..."
Aribar: "... Can we just Control, Alt, Delete him?"
Dr. Robotnik: "I'm not Robotnik! I'm better than ten Robotniks!"
Razor: "Oh no..."
Gibby "Jumps on in" as some may say.
Metal Man (GM): His craft speeds up 10 times.
Pat: "You're Bob aren't you!"
Metal Man (GM): *PROGRAM GLITCH.*
Dr. Donez: "Actually it's pronounced 'Alt-Ctrl-Del.'"
Gibby: "...we're fighting a Bob?"
Pat: "Apparently."
Dr. Donez: "What the..!?"
Bob: "I'm Bob, thus, I have more power!"
Metal Man (GM): His floating orbs are electrified.
Pat: "Ha! I knew it!"
Gibby: "Umm..."
Garrick: "Would you STOP making him stronger?!?!"
Pat: "You couldn't hide from me, Bob!"
Aribar: "Control Alt Delete! Control Alt Delete!"
Dr. Donez: "Yes! Hit the nice boy with a frying pan!"
Gibby: "This is weird... even for me!"
Metal Man: "...I have a feeling calling him other things than Robotnik will make him evil."
Pat: "Mom says go to your room! Now!"
Garrick: "I just called him Robotnik."
Bob: "You shall die for this intransigence!"
Pat: "Intr-what?"
Metal Man (GM): He flies at Pat.
Gibby: "...was that a word?"
Dr. Donez: "Yes. Yes it was."
Metal Man (GM): *SMASHBUTCHERDESTROY.*
Gibby: "EEP!"
Garrick: "...holy crap..."
Pat: *death to him.*
Aribar: "Are we doomed?"
Dr. Donez: "Finally; both are shutted up."
Bob: "I am doom! AHAHAHAHAHA!"
Garrick: "No, we're the Questers. Somebody scan him..."
Gibby: "My head hurts."
Dr. Donez: "I have a better idea. If this truly is a simulation..."
Aribar Dexes Robotnik...
Bob, Lord of Electric Death: "I am Bob, lord of electric death!"
Dex: "...DING! Bob, lord of electric death. HP: 500. STR: 30. DEX: 25. CON: 15. INT: 25. WIS: 10. CHA: 10. Defense: 20. BAB: +10. DR: 10."
Dr. Donez has pondered under a tense difficult couple minutes and has come up with an answer! "Computer: Restore program 'Robotnik' to time index 15:55 of 71720.04."
Gibby: "Yeah... that guy's WAY too strong to fight."
Dex: "A glitched program. Due to no longer being held within the constraints of being Robotnik, he has become smarter, faster, and more deadly."
Computer: "...Attempt fail. System corrupted."
Razor: "Hmm... I don't like this..."
Metal Man (GM): The area morphs into a pirate ship suddenly.
Bob, Lord of Electric Death: "I have full control for I am Bob!"
Garrick: "...let's just blast him already..."
Gibby: "We have to get out of there!" *here.
Garrick begins to charge his buster..
Dr. Donez: "Only one way to do this..."
Aribar: "... . Throw Donez at it!"
Dr. Donez: "QUESTER PACK! ATTACK! I've always wanted to say a parody of it but nnnoooooo..."
Metal Man: "I'll teach him the pain of electronics! RADIO BOOOOOOOOM!" *throws a Radio at the menace.*
Dr. Donez: "Jay fooled me into a contract of not being able to make fun of it."
Metal Man (GM): He takes half damage.
Metal Man revives Pat with a 'shroom.
Pat blasts fire.
Dr. Donez: "We need to fight fire with fire... Ice with ice..."
Garrick: "Stop using saying and actually make a plan!!"
Dr. Donez: "Reverse psychology with chicken nuggets..."
Metal Man (GM): Pat deals half damage.
Garrick: "...I'm this close from just blasting that damned bird..."
Razor torches him with Bowser's Inferno.
Dr. Donez: "Hey dunderhead for smarts! It's real sweet when you uhh... Go realllll sllloooowww to defeat your opponents! It makes it easier!"
Metal Man (GM): Hit.
Bob, Lord of Electric Death: "GRR! I shall teach you electric death!"
Metal Man (GM): Robotnik fires tons of those orbs at Razor.
Razor: "OW!"
Aribar seems to have an evil plan... He sheaths his sword and casts Bolt on Gibby's own sword to attempt to power it up before... Picking up the lil Kirby and throwing him at Robotnik... "Gibbydoken!"
Gibby: "You ready, Ari?"
Aribar: "Yup!"
Dr. Donez: "This is dumbing my intellect down by 3 points a minute..." *pecks Metal.*
Metal Man: "Ow."
Gibby goes shooting out at an attempt to stab the Robotnik with the bolted sword.
Dr. Donez: "You have any kind of small comp to view the schematics of this place?"
Metal Man: "...Nope. Robotnik's overloading everything."
Dr. Donez: "Yeah, I bet."
Metal Man (GM): Robotnik does the matrix, slow mo avoiding Gibby.
Garrick quickly backs up the attack by firing a CHARGED FLASHBOLT! WHOAOAOAOOAOAOAO!!!!
Metal Man (GM): ...And while avoiding, he is hit full-on by the Flashbolt.
Aribar blinks... "Note to self: Improve on Gibbydoken..."
Gibby: (slow mo) "NOOOOOOOO!" He flies into a wall. "...ow."
Dr. Donez: "My bet is that a line 234 has done an illegal operation to sub-columns E709 through G984 in sectors A-K of Quadrants 7-10 on this simulation."
Bob, Lord of Electric Death: "...Ack! My power is failing!"
Dr. Donez: "In other words..."
Gibby: "...was that English?"
Metal Man (GM): ...He is so confused it isn't funny.
Dr. Donez: "What I said was that this program got corrupted by a virus."
Bob, Lord of Electric Death: "I must kill you, invisible electric men!"
Dr. Donez: "A virus caused by uber-stupidity."
Garrick: "DAMN that felt good!"
Dr. Donez: "I'm going to sleep..." *closes his eyes.*
Metal Man (GM): Ari is after the two Rs.
Yurie appears, seemingly out of nowhere beside Robotnik, then strikes him HARD with a Power Strike.
Metal Man (GM): Hit.
Bob, Lord of Electric Death: "I must destroy you, myself! AIAIAIAIAIAIAIA!"
Metal Man (GM): He deals damage to himself.
Gibby: "...hmm..."
Razor shakes his head slowly before his gloves glow faintly. He lets off a Hyper Burst.
Metal Man (GM): No hits.
Metal Man fires off a Tri-attack at the insanity.
Metal Man (GM): He fails to avoid, and takes more damage.
Aribar attempts to cast a Fireball Barrage right now.
Metal Man (GM): Full damage.
Garrick spends this turn a-charging another blast, since he can't do much damage with a normal shot.
Yurie: "Guys, I have an idea!"
Gibby: "Yeah?"
Aribar: "What?"
Yurie: "Aribar, Razor, think we can do a Three-part combo?"
Razor nods.
Pat leaps up and lets loose a punch.
Aribar: "Possibly..."
Yurie: "Aribar's Thordain, My Fireball Barrage, and Razor's Hyper Burst attack."
Gibby attempts a brand new move. He opens his mouth, and shoots out a wave of fire at 'Robotnik.' (Bower's Inferno).
Metal Man (GM): Half damage.
Gibby: "Now THAT'S a spicy meatball."
Metal Man (GM): Robotnik snaps out of confusion.
Bob, Lord of Electric Death: "...I will teach you to mess with me!"
Metal Man (GM): Robotnik flies at Garrick and misses.
Yurie moves over to Aribar and Razor, holding out her free hand as flames appear around it. *Charging fo rCombo Attack!*
Aribar raises his sword into the air to prepare for Thordain.
Garrick: "You two keep charging for that combo, I'll cover you..."
Pat braces himself in ground and fires up his gauntlets.
Garrick fires off his charged blast at the evil Bob thingy.
Metal Man (GM): Miss. Bob-Bob moves out of the way. Ari is charged for Combo... ~Team Blast~
Yurie: *Fireball Barrage+Thordain+Hyper Burst= *EXPLOSION ARRAY!!*
Razor clenches his fists. "Go!"
Metal Man (GM): Robotnik takes half damage. But he is hit by them all.
Pat: "...What the hell?"
Yurie releases her attack, all four blasts screaming in... and releasing a ginormous wall of explosions of flame, light and electricity.
Gibby covers his eyes. "Jeez... ease up on the pyros will ya?"
Dex: "Bob, Lord of Electric Death: 191/500."
Pat uses fireness.
Metal Man (GM): Hit.
Metal Man puts away his gun, and then pulls out a Radish. "RADISH THROW!!!!!"
Metal Man (GM): Hmmm... that deals... Nothing.
Razor: "That worked really well guys... want to try again?"
Yurie: "Of course, lets let 'em have it!"
Aribar: "Sure!"
Yurie begins charging another Fireball Barrage.
Razor stands next to Yurie, gloves glowing as he gets ready for the ultimate combo attack of |)00|\/|.
Gibby prepares to shoot out another wave of fire.
Garrick charges his cannon for another charged Flashbolt shot.
Metal Man (GM): Robotnik flies at Razor. Miss.
Pat: "I'll have no part of your combo, thank you."
Razor ducks under it and keeps charging.
Metal Man (GM): ...Everyone but Pat's special attacks are combinated and fired as one huge beam of death.
Yurie: *Fireball Barrage+Thordain+Hyper Burst+Tri Attack+Bowser Breath= *EXPLOSION ARRAY!!* *Fireball Barrage+Thordain+Hyper Burst+Tri Attack+Bowser Breath= *MEGATON EXPLOSION ARRAY!!* *Fireball Barrage+Thordain+Hyper Burst+Tri Attack+Bowser Breath+Flash Bolt= *MEGATON EXPLOSION ARRAY!!* *Fireball Barrage+Thordain+Hyper Burst+Tri Attack+Bowser Breath+Flash Bolt= *MEGATON EXPLOSION ARRAY!!*
Metal Man (GM): 1/2 damage, but everyone hits him. Bob, Lord of Electric Death spontaneously combusts.
Bob, Lord of Electric Death: "Gah!!!! *PROGRAM LIMIT EXCEEDED*"
Metal Man (GM): The glitched program explodes.
Yurie (GM): The six-point combo combines as one, then wipes over 'Bob' with a huge tsunami of lighting, fire, energy, heat and death, followed by a huge explosion.
Dr. Donez wakes up.
Gibby: *Fireball Barrage+Thordain+Hyper Burst+Tri Attack+Bowser Breath+Flash Bolt= *MEGATON EXPLOSION ARRAY!!*
Aribar: "Now toss Dorkez at it!"
Dr. Donez: "BBAHAHH! What happened!?"
Yurie: "Bingo!!"
Dr. Donez: "Did the stupidity die!? Or did it become smart!?"
Yurie sheathes her sword and poses. ^^
Aribar: "Nah... You're still here, Donez."
Gibby: "Umm... yup. We beat it good."
Yurie: "We smashed it into tiny pieces."
Razor cracks his neck to the side. "That was fun..."
Computer: "Simulation Completed."
Pat: "Bah." *Walks out of the room.*
Gibby poses.
Dr. Donez: "Uhhh... I'm still glued to your head, Metal Man."
Metal Man (GM): The simulation blinks out. The Questers are all back at the holoroom.
Dr. Donez: "...by the way, what is your name?"
Metal Man: "I am Metal Man."
Gibby: "I'm Gibby!" *does another pose.*
Aribar: "Aribar."
Metal Man: "Which reminds me. I get to give out the rewards for this mission."
Dr. Donez: "Yes, I know what you are, but who are you?"
Yurie: "Yurie."
Garrick: "I'm Garrick."
Yurie: "...we're the Questers." ^^
Aribar: "... We're special."
Gibby: "Yup... we beat up bad guys!"
Razor: "Indeed."
Dr. Donez: Ah yes, the female who forced me into that bag."
Metal Man: "Now... Going alphabetically... Aribar. You were there the whole time, and did everything."
Dr. Donez: "Like I said last night, please skip my name."
Aribar: "And I didn't die for once!"
Metal Man: "You did moderately well, aside from brushes with traps. So... you get... SAND STORM."
Aribar: "A pair of shoe--Oh! Sand storm."
Metal Man: "Next... let's see..."
Gibby: "Cool."
Yurie a little megaman cinema pops up, showing Ari doing the Sand Storm attack.
Metal Man: "There's Garrick. He arrived a little late, but did well on that last boss and the trap. So... he gets... ZAP."
Garrick is busy putting his buster back into his inside jacket holster. He walks up to Metal.
Garrick: "A critical charged Flashbolt will do that to ya..."
Metal Man: "Next, there's Gibby. He also came in really late. However, he still did decently. So, he gets... Sandpunch."
Gibby jumps for joy.
Dr. Donez just kinda... falls..off Metal. He gets back up. "Do I get anything for that lousy excuse of what you call a 'Hologram'?"
Metal Man: "Then... there's myself. I was there the whole time, although I understandably couldn't reveal the traps and enemies I made by myself... So I get... SANDBOMB."
Dr. Donez: "I'd recommend a nice doggy treat to congratulate yourself."
Metal Man: "Oh yeah. You, Donez... even though you couldn't fight, you helped a bit. So... you get... SANDSHOCK."
Dr. Donez: "Yes, I did help destroy those guards with my intelligence."
Aribar mumbles, "More like stupidity..."
Dr. Donez: "!? Who said that?"
Pat: "Aribar did."
Metal Man: "Then... there's Pat. Pat beat that puzzle easily. and punched some things."
Aribar: "Uhh... That Cutting guy you were talking about... Yeah..."
Metal Man: "So, he gets... BERSERKPUNCH."
Pat: "I also set a few things on fire..."
Dr. Donez: "Hmm... now how will I use this new attack for my ice pick..."
Pat: "...oy."
Metal Man: "Razor did a lot of different things, and did just as well as Ari. So, he also gets... SANDSTORM."
Metal Man: "Finally, we have Yurie. She went in and out, but did a lot while she was around. Thusly, she gets... SANDBOLT."
Razor: *All his slots are filled now.*
Yurie: "Plus, I thought up the thing that took that robot down easily."
Metal Man: "Oh yeah. Did I forget you, Garrick? Errr... wait. No. Okay, then everyone gets 1000 coins."
Garrick: "So, is that it?"
Metal Man: "Yes."
Yurie: "Looks like it."

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