Super Smash Quest² - Story - Chapter 5: Diplomacy Across the High Seas


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Date: August 22nd & 25th, 2008.
Trivia: The 22nd was the day I spoke to Howard Drossin, a music composer from Sonic and Knuckles, and the 25th was Aribar's first day of College.
Metal Man (GM): The Questers managed to find 'Jack the Widowmaker', and beat up some bizarre echidna cult people. Julian collected an easy 100 rings for taking 'mere pictures' and now the group is back at the beach. Why? Well, obviously they want their reward from Marley, who sent them on the quest for him in the first place. So they're all there at the moment; Digi, Dragoshi, Deloth, Jack (leaning on his bizarre ancient staff) and Marley, whose many-colored boat is... finished.
Marley: "So, you... found him without dying? Heh... heh."
Dragoshi: "Yep."
Deloth: "Didn't think we would?"
Jack: "Ahhh, you made your boat again too? You're a nut, aren't you?"
Dragoshi: "Had to kill some jerks that were in the way, though." :/
Digifanatic: *mutters to Deloth.* "I think he overhyped the danger part a bit."
Julian: *Money, money, yeah yeah.* "So we're takin' a ride on this thing?"
Marley: "This time I'm gonna make it across the sea of chaos, you should see these people in action." *Turns to Questers.* "Sooo... you're going across, then, right? We may not be back here for a long while, you know. You want to leave even though you've just gotten to know the area?"
Deloth: "Yep."
Julian: "If that's what fetchin' this wackjob was fo'."
Digifanatic: "Indeed."
Jack: "Ahhh, I hate this friggin' island. I'll swim out there myself if you ain't going. Hate these people! They have all their stories crossed, and whenever the world's in trouble, guess what? They ignore my advice."
Dragoshi: "I suppose so." .oO(...Though, that's gonna leave that base ignored for a while, though...)
Jack: "A fat man steals a big rock. I suggest they SHOOT that man, but nooo. A random hedgehog will save us!"
Deloth: "...Wait, whoa, whoa. What?"
Jack: "Then he flies a space ship over. I suggest they send their big jets after it. Guess what? They don't do that either. No. The world's countlessly nearly destroyed by their idiocy. I want to get very far away, before they make a... permanent mistake."
Marley: "He used to work with GUN, and... yeah. He had a bad time."
Deloth: "Ah..."
Marley: "GUN's never quite managed to keep the world safe. I would know. The thugs and thieves too easily sway their minds with cash."
Lance: "Marley, can I ask a favor? Do you know Tail's phone number?"
Marley: "Ah." He shakes his head. "He hid his phone number after one fan too many asked if he was a girl or not."
Lance blinks.
Marley: "You'd think they were blind."
Julian: "We ain't even got a phone."
Lance: "The boat has one Julian, remember?"
Jack: "Oh yeah? They thought Shadow was Sonic! That... that was when I had enough. I mean, we helped make him, yet we didn't know who he was... pfft."
Marley: "Yeah, it's a sat phone. The best. Your parts helped a lot."
Metal Man (GM): He steps aboard the boat. Jack leaps atop it.
Julian: "Whatever. What you wanna be callin' Tails for anyway?"
Jack: "I'll be looking out for any bogies. I haven't had this many chances to kill people since that incident with the fake Eggman..."
Lance: "Oh, just to report what we found."
Marley: "Hm. All systems are go, so you all jump aboard when you're ready."
Deloth hops on.
Lance jumps aboard.
Julian: *To the boat!*
Digifanatic: "Hmm. Lance has a good idea..." *heads in.*
Dragoshi: *Follows.*
Metal Man (GM): The Questers are aboard the boat now; and Marley's at the bridge, manning the wheel.
Marley: "So, I'll just mention one last time. You ready to go? It'll be a looong way, sorry if I'm annoying."
Digifanatic: "I'm fine and ready."
Deloth: "Ready."
Dragoshi: "Ready as I'll ever be."
Marley: "Okay then."
Metal Man (GM): He pulls the throttle, and the boat begins to make its way out to the sea.
Marley: "We have a while before we get to the danger zone, so I'll be asking you now... ...what exactly did you see while you were on the mainland? I figure I may well explain what I can. Me and Jack go way back, and we know the land very well... I suspect there's something bigger than any of us afoot, since even the Eggman's been weird..."
Digifanatic: "Just some strange turbulence out on the water that took some odd form to it."
Marley: "Heh, we'll see the water. I mean... the places. People. Things. What you were doing since I saw you first."
Deloth: "...Hey, Marley, is there a mirror on this ship?"
Metal Man (GM): He leans back as the boat goes...
Marley: "Ehhh... maybe somewhere... why?"
Deloth: "I need to take a look at something on my back."
Marley: "You go find it, then..."
Metal Man (GM): Deloth discovers a discarded pizza... "Pominoes Pizza." Discarded pizza box.
Dragoshi: *Tries to search for the mirror.* <_>
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi finds mostly garbage and bolts.
Marley: "Well, if ye really want it, why don't you go up top and ask Jack?"
Deloth: "Because I want to not get my head blasted off my shoulders?"
Dragoshi: *Just continues.*
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi picks up an old drink container and accidentally spills it all over himself.
Marley: "Ya know, I think you'd be better off with him than accidentally dropping something heavy on your head..."
Metal Man (GM): Appears the Questers simply can't find it... but that's obvious, the boat's unknown to them.
Dragoshi: *Just shrugs that off and tries one last time.*
Metal Man (GM): Even with supernatural luck, Dragoshi... finds where it was once. A mirror-shaped space in the dust.
Marley: "I wasn't expecting ya to want it that badly. I put it away somewhere a while ago... Jack would know where."
Lance: *to Marley quietly.* "Marley, We found a Eggman base with an eggrobo active. I wanted to call Tails and tell him that, since he was looking."
Deloth sighs. "Forget it. ...By the way, Drago, if you ever happen to have a theory on that little tentacle incident last fight, please let me know." *muttering.* "I swear I can feel that thing in my back..."
Marley: "Hm." *He leans back.* "Eggman base." *He scratches his chin.* "Which one?"
Digifanatic: "There was one in the jungle-y area between Emerald Coast and Station Square."
Marley: "Ah. It's a big wreck. You do anything there? I swear it was useless..."
Digifanatic: "Yeah, the jungle area by Final Egg... we found the Eggrobo just looking for a place to stay and we followed it to his base. He wanted a Chaos Drive to power up his shack again."
Lance: "I would like to point out I was not here for that part."
Digifanatic: *muttering to Marley.* "Let's say we had no idea how much chaos we could buy for 30 rings..."
Marley: "Power it up?" He chuckles. "Well, guess it's good we left, then. The base contains a number of weapons which could well ruin the entire continent. I bet there'll be quite a mess if there's anyone other than a single Eggrobo involved..."
Digifanatic: "Ah..."
Marley: "You just better keep it secret. Helping Eggman is tantamount to death. Even though he's gone... it could be construed as that. I'll check out the Eggrobo, though. It could be like those rogue ones we had once. Nasty things. They attacked relentlessly without purpose."
Digifanatic: "I imagine... we just happened to catch a glance of the guy on the beach..."
Deloth: "Huh. If I had known we had a death warrant out on us, I would've gone for broke. Looted a few stores."
Marley: "Well, nobody knows, so you're okay. Speaking of that, looks like we're at the trouble spot." He stops the boat and climbs to the main deck.
Digifanatic: "Well, we're on a clean slate once we hit our next island, continent, whatever..."
Lance: "And lets not power up an evil base this time."
Deloth heads up with Marley. "What's up?"
Lance follows Deloth.
Marley: "The island and the maniacs who blew up the past ship... and GUN."
Metal Man (GM): From the deck the Questers see a massive open sea area. An island is levitating over it... GUN ships, 3 black ones, are patrolling here. There's also a flying ship... ...Echidnas are aboard this one. It's making threatening motions towards the GUN ships.
Deloth: "...Well, shit."
Jack: "Ah, a bunch of worthless beings in one place! Good target practice."
Marley: "We need to get through unbothered. This ship can't take a ton of hits."
Digifanatic: *heads out and takes a look.* "Oh boy..."
Dragoshi: "...Welp."
Lance gets his bow ready, just in case.
Marley: "So then, whomever you people are. You don't mind if I just drive right at that whole mess? It's our only way through, at least, I think it is..."
Lance tries to think of another way! .oO(Barney the dinosaur!)
Deloth: "Ready to go. I have a feeling that Jack will take out a good chunk of these ships, anyways."
Digifanatic: "I don't know about what the others think, but I say we can be decent backup."
Lance: "I have no better ideas."
Jack: "Well, the issue is I only have about two shots left in this evil staff. Not enough dead people's souls. I'm thinking I'll take down the echidna ship there. Those things are what sunk this ship before."
Deloth: "Souls, huh..."
Jack: "They seem weak against this thing, luckily."
Dragoshi: "Well... Save 'em, then. Best that they be used when we need 'em." *ya. *really. *ya really need 'em.
Jack: "Save 'em? I would, if I could, but that ship up there will blow us up just like last time... And it'll survive up to five hits from this thing..."
Lance: "Can't you blow up the ship, absorb the souls long range and power up the stick?"
Jack: "This won't blow up the echidna ship, and it can't do long-range."
Lance: "Ah."
Dragoshi: *Tries to think o' somethin'...*
Deloth: "Could you maybe shoot out that ship's battery?"
Jack: "Which one? I can damage the Echidna one so that it can't chase us, so that'd be the first thing I do. The problem are the GUN ships, which can chase us and summon backup much faster. And they don't think we should leave their wonderful land."
Marley: "We have torpedoes and some turrets, if we attack first they can be routed, but then we'll always be on GUN's blacklist..."
Deloth: "Gun it and swerve around them?"
Lance: "Can't we just wait for those two dummy groups to start fighting then go though?"
Digifanatic: "Yeah, really..."
Jack: "There's the problem. They aren't officially at war for the moment. They're obviously exchanging angry messages right now."
Deloth: "Hm."
Lance: "Can the deathstick make its attack appear to come from another direction than the casters?"
Digifanatic: "How about we just casually sail around these guys without looking suspicious, if that's possible?"
Dragoshi: "Somehow I doubt that. Mainly because that'd, yanno... Be too easy."
Jack: "If I could make it do that, maybe I'd have just blasted everyone I disliked with strange beams from nowhere."
Marley: "If we go around them, the GUN men will chase us... and the ship, too. The Cultists don't want us leaving either..."
Digifanatic: "They know it's us, huh? Jack, do the Cultists have a grudge with Marley?"
Jack: "Nah, they just don't want anyone going through here. And it just so happens it's nigh impossible to go too far left or right--those weird currents are there."
Marley: "Well, we could try the weird currents."
Jack: "You nuts? Nobody survives those."
Marley: "Well, I'm not sure about these ships here either..."
Lance: "Weird currents?"
Digifanatic: "Jack, do the Cultists have a grudge with Marley? Depends on whether we get sucked into a whirlpool or get caught by some creature you read about in classical literature..."
Marley: "Weird currents. They smash ships to pieces and suck them to the bottom of the sea. We could try anyway."
Lance: "Do what you think is best Marley and Jack, you have the most experience here."
Jack: "Well then. Let's get cracking. And you! You weird people. You come out here. Which one of you has experience with machineguns?"
Deloth points to Dragoshi.
Dragoshi: >_>
Lance: "I can use a bow. Erm. Other than that nope."
Jack: "Good. Freak of nature, sit there." He points at a seat behind a machinegun, after pointing at Dragoshi. "Rest of you, here's the deal. The ship will take a lot of damage. You'll be called to help weld up holes." He points to a pile of portable welding things.
Deloth: "That might not be the best job for me."
Jack: "Marley will be driving us straight at them, then into the weird currents... We lose the GUN ships there and fight the cultist ship from here."
Dragoshi: "'Aight" *Casually walks over to the seat, and sits there.*
Lance picks up the PWT.
Digifanatic: *on construction.*
Deloth grabs a PWT anyways.
Marley: "Hold on, here we go..." The ship revs up to full speed.
Digifanatic: *also takes one.*
Metal Man (GM): Almost immediately, the Questers hear the radio going off.
Dragoshi: *Gets ready..*
GUN Captain: "Cease your progress immediately, this area is confidential."
Cultist: "This area belongs to the Echidna people. Stop now!"
GUN Captain: "No, it belongs to GUN."
Cultist: "No it doesn't!"
Digifanatic: .oO(Oh man, this is great...)
Metal Man (GM): They begin arguing on the radio. Marley turns it down.
Marley: "Guess we'll have a few moments of surprise then."
Jack: "Eyyy... now for some fireworks."
Dragoshi: .oO(No, shut up, it belongs to everyone, you ignorant asses.) *Looks less than pleased right now.*
Metal Man (GM): The blue water ripples as the three GUN ships move to block the way. The Echidna ship is more dangerous looking; it flies in with its guns aimed.
Jack: "Idiots. You there on the machinegun. Get ready."
Dragoshi: "Understood."
Jack: "Okay, first off, for my first shot... this here's an easy one."
Dragoshi: *Gettin' ready...*
Metal Man (GM): He points his staff at the Echidna ship's bow, and it fires a large turquoise laser. A shield around the ship is hit and shatters, then the bridge of the enemy ship is medium-damaged.
Cultist: "...It's Jack! Kill them all before we get killed first! Ahhhhhh!!!"
Metal Man (GM): The ship opens fire! *BLAM BLAM BLAM.*
Jack: "Okay you, fire away at the ship!"
Dragoshi: "I guess that's my cue." *And, Dragoshi aims his machinegun at the cultist's ship, and opens fire with his machinegun!*
Metal Man (GM): The ship lurches to the left, hitting the left side of Marley's ship.
Jack: "Eh, good for a first try."
Dragoshi: "Ehhh..."
Metal Man (GM): The left side develops a crack.
Marley: "Okay, now to turn towards the rough water..."
Metal Man (GM): Digi welds it up pretty nicely.
Marley: "Here we go... better watch out!"
Metal Man (GM): The boat flies on into the rough water.
GUN Captain: "It's Jack? I can't believe it... ..." The GUN ships slow down and stop.
Jack: "Here goes the less than effective second shot..."
Metal Man (GM): The ship dodges that, he shakes his head.
Jack: "50% power is always worthless."
Dragoshi: "I see..."
Jack: "It's all you, weirdo."
Dragoshi: *Readies his second shot, and tries to shoot up that damned cultist ship again.*
Marley: "Any of you have decent ranged powers? We might need 'em. That thing--" The ship rocks. The Cultist ship fires repeatedly.
Metal Man (GM): *BAMBAMBAMBAMBAM* Bullet holes everywhere.
Lance: "I have ranged abilities."
Metal Man (GM): Another crack appears on the right side.
Marley: "Well, whatever it us, use it while someone gets that crack over there!"
Metal Man (GM): Jack shakes his head as he digs through his equipment, and Deloth welds up the other hole.
Lance fires off 2 underclock arrows at the ship. "It might work!"
Metal Man (GM): The ship is hit. It throws a few sparks. The water gets increasingly rough.
GUN Captain: "If Jack is really on there, perhaps we can help you... if you could just have him speak to us."
Jack: "Heck no! Kill the echidnas! Into the deep waters!"
Dragoshi: *Snarls in annoyance, and continues trying to shoot up that damned cultist ship, even though the rough waters'll prolly' make 'is aim off.*
Marley: "Really? But... we're in a bit of trouble here..."
Dragoshi: "That we are..."
Jack: "The bottom of the sea is far better compared to letting them know I'm alive again."
Metal Man (GM): The ship dodges yet again, and opens fire again. *BAM!* *BAMF!* *BOOOM* The ship takes serious damage. 6 cracks appear.
Jack: "I swear I had a backup on me somewhere... Nope... not there... not there... not there either."
Metal Man (GM): Water is leaking in...
Lance fires off 2 more underclock arrows.
Digifanatic: *grabs another welding device.*
Metal Man (GM): The ship is hit again and sparks. 1 weld removed. Deloth fails to remove his.
Lance rushes over and tries to get one.
Metal Man (GM): A rushed weld... Doesn't work this time. 5 cracks left. The enemy Echidna ship isn't anywhere near dead yet...
Dragoshi: *And, it's Dragoshi's turn to fail at shooting the damned cultist ship. Again. Whee.*
Metal Man (GM): The machinegun jams!
Jack: "You know, you'd think I'd have put my gun in a better place that I could find..."
Digifanatic: *Takes that op.*
Metal Man (GM): *BAM BOOM BAAAAAM.* 6 more cracks appear... 11 total.
Lance tried for a system crash combo. BSOD and Blind!
Metal Man (GM): Digi welds not one, but two cracks away!
Lance attempts another rush welding.
Marley: "Urgh... we're slowing down. The damage is getting extensive..."
Metal Man (GM): The rush welding fails again. Despite damaging their sensors further, the echidna ship fires again! *BAM... BAM* 3 more cracks now. The Questers begin to see land in the distance.
Digifanatic: "This is not cool..."
Metal Man (GM): Deloth's skill is too low to seemingly make his next attempted repair work.
Lance: "Well, gotta have hope." *fires off 3 pink glowing arrows.*
Metal Man (GM): Ship's at about 50% energy now. Hit, miss. Hit.
Dragoshi: *Tries to repair the machinegun.*
Jack: "Gah! It's in pieces!"
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi can't seem to get the gun working either...
Lance goes for the rush weld.
Deloth: "Drago! Try your assault rifle!"
Metal Man (GM): One more crack removed.
Dragoshi: *Draws his machinegun.*
Metal Man (GM): Dragoshi misses with his machinegun. The ship's full of cracks and the rough water is flowing aboard... but! The Echidna ship turns around.
Marley: "We're too far away, and somebody damaged their engines with that weird magic..."
Dragoshi: *Tries to futilely fire at the ship one last time.* :/
Marley: "Too bad we won't have all that much left of this ship..."
Lance goes for two more shots of BSOD and underclock too.
Metal Man (GM): The Questers see the new world!
Marley: "Hm. We just barely made it... because you stalled 'em just long enough..."
Metal Man (GM): He walks out, the ship on auto-pilot towards the land.
Marley: "Though we'll need to repair everything again to go back... Well, except for the torpedoes."
Metal Man (GM): Within a few moments, the Questers land on a sandy beach. On the beach, of all things, they see King Demon. There's a question block laying in the sand.
King Demon notices everyone. "Uh... hi?"
Deloth: "...How did YOU get here?!"
Dragoshi: "...Heya."
Digifanatic: "Demon? Guess... guess that portal messed around with you the way it did with Julian."
Dragoshi: *Walks over to the question block... And kicks it!*
King Demon: "Guess so... I'm not even sure where "here" is!"
Digifanatic: "Well, by the looks o' that block, we're somewhere in the Mushroom Kingdom!"
Lance: "So you got delay dumped? Interesting."
King Demon: "Yep, which is weird, since I haven't seen any goombas or Koopas yet..."
Lance: "Looks like Metal did too."
Digifanatic: "Not delayed. Just rerouted."
King Demon: "So... what's going on anyway?"
Digifanatic: "Well, we nearly got caught on a blacklist on an island that Sonic's probably been to a few times. Considering he doesn't live there. And..." *sighs and turns to Deloth.* "Something happened to Deloth. "
Jack: "Ah... what in the heck is this place? I want to go back to the madmen in the ocean."
King Demon: "Huh... looks like you've found yourselves in trouble again, huh?"
Marley: "Don't worry, you can stay here."
Metal Man (GM): Marley gets out and looks at the area.
Digifanatic: "It wasn't our fault." *grins.*
King Demon: "It never is, but you get in it just the same!"
Digifanatic: "They just think because we're strangers with really cool weapons and such that we pose a threat to their island!"
King Demon: "Guess it's time for us to go and cause more trouble than we're worth once again huh?"
Marley: "Ah... this place. It has been described in legends. ...A kingdom of Mushrooms... what a weird place."
Dragoshi: *Still kickin' the question block.*
Metal Man (GM): The Questers can see giant mushrooms into the distance. The question block flies into the ground and pops out... a mushroom.
King Demon: "Crap, you beat me to it, Drag!"
Dragoshi: *Grabs it.* "Damn. I was hoping for a coin. A mushroom shall suffice, though." .oO(Knowing my luck so far, it's prolly' a poison one...)
Metal Man (GM): It glows in Dragoshi's hand. If he eats it... he thinks he can probably grow twice as big, for a small amount of time.
Marley: "So then, you guys want to explore this area?"
Digifanatic: "That one of healing ones or one of those pump-you-up ones?"
King Demon: "I've been around here a while, haven't seen much yet..."
Lance: "Banana terracotta pie! Erm, don't mind me."
Deloth: "Anybody else ready for some lunch?"
Digifanatic: "Maybe, depending on how well-treated we are here."
Marley: "Oh, yes... each of you should take this, too."
King Demon: "Food? I haven't eaten in... well, since I got here, what do you have?"
Metal Man (GM): He hands 10 coins to each of the Questers. Even Demon.
Dragoshi: *Takes the coins.* "Thanks."
King Demon takes the coins from the guy he doesn't know.
Marley: "You've been helpful... ...even you, person I have just seen."
King Demon: "Uh... thanks, I guess..."
Deloth pockets the cash. "Thanks."
Digifanatic: "Thank you... yeah, he's a good friend of ours, just wound up somewhere else."
Lance: "Thank you Marley."
Marley: "I'll help you cook lunch, then."
King Demon: "All RIGHT!"
Lance: "I can help cook too." :P
Metal Man (GM): The group eats, and now has finished lunch. They're still on the beach. There are castles to the North. That is the only way really to go, although the beach extends far to the West. Jack remains on the boat, in his archaeologist gear, peering suspiciously into the distance, while Marley idly repairs his ship, whistling to himself.
Digifanatic: "Well, castles seem like a good place to take a gander at, right?"
Metal Man (GM): The land in the distance has a number of mushrooms; just now, however, it's a bit clearer. Beyond the first few feet it becomes rather dark and ominous. Clearly, Bowser's land. At least, to those who've seen it before. Which... would be almost none of the Questers. :p The first castle is dead ahead; The gate and bridge left open for anyone to wander in. Two Koopa Troopa guards are on duty. It's a small, SMB1-style castle. Strangely, the Koopa guards have not been remotely bothered by the Questers' appearance. Indeed. They watch from their distance, but otherwise the castle carries on normally.
Aribar stumbles off of the boat and towards the others and looks about the landscape. Seasickness has left the half-elf incapacitated during the boat ride... And oddly enough, the period before the ride as well.
Metal Man (GM): The nice, stable sand of this beach makes it a welcome alternative.
Deloth: "You okay, Ari? You're looking a bit green."
Aribar: "Ground's not shaking any more... I'll... Possibly be okay."
Digifanatic: "If I remember correctly, Aribar was very aligned to electricity, which is kind of odd because electricity is strong to water..."
Metal Man (GM): The guards continue watching the Questers, as they have. Eventually, a single Koopa in armor with a hammer walks out of the castle. He peers at the group before walking straight towards them. He has no fear... or seemingly, knowledge of who they are. The Questers may well be aliens to him. His hammer is not quite in a throwing position. He's a little bit shorter than the average member of the Questers group. He's about 15 ft away now. Walking at a steady pace.
Digifanatic: *to the Hammer guy.* "Hello."
Metal Man (GM): He stops for a second, then puts the hammer away.
Hammer Brother: "Greetings, foreign travelers. Welcome... to Bowser Land."
Digifanatic: *contently nods and listens in.*
Hammer Brother: "We have identified you do not hail from any land we have seen; therefore I was sent to ask you what continuent you hail from, for there are many... his kingship, Bowser, must know. If you be some sort of Diplomatic envoy, he would like to meet you, and further perhaps give you a meal; as is custom."
Digifanatic: .oO(Oh man, not all this again.)
Metal Man (GM): This is quite weird. The Bowser of old would just try to kill the Questers, regardless of who they were. Not to mention even walking near his castle would mean hordes of guards trying to kill them. Clearly, it's up to you how this strangely more politics-saavy type will see them. The Hammer Brother waits for a response patiently.
Aribar just stands back and lets the others talk. He holds onto his stomach and wonders why this place is so different from the Mushroom Kingdom of old.
Digifanatic: "Well, as newcomers to this area, it would be well appreciated to come into a new land and find hospitality."
Hammer Brother: "So you are new... and where did you come from?"
Digifanatic: .oO(Bleh...)
Metal Man (GM): He waits, wondering why the Questers are so quiet.
Digifanatic: "We come from Central City." .oO(Well, it IS just about where we last were.)
Hammer Brother: "Er... yes, that is obviously something large, but you came from the Southern sea... and luckily, missed Wario's island... but what of your continent?"
Metal Man (GM): Marley walks out, in his fisherman regalia, about 5'6"ish. He looks to Digi.
Digifanatic: "Wario's Island?"
Marley: "Should I tell him, or should you? I mean, if you want to tell him where we came from."
Hammer Brother: "The evil Wario has his own tinpot dictatorship, on an island where he has his own castle."
Digifanatic: "Huh..."
Hammer Brother: "All who stray too close are sunk and never heard from again."
Digifanatic: "Hang on." *to Marley.* "I didn't want us to be vulnerable by not saying anything, but if you think you have a better way out of this, go ahead."
Hammer Brother: "Your ship almost looks like as if it went near... if so, you are lucky to be alive..."
Marley: "Hm." He turns to the Hammer Brother. "Well, the continent is called Mobius. At least, the area is..."
Hammer Brother: "So... you represent this place... right?" He looks to Digi. Marley offers no answer.
Digifanatic: "Yes."
Hammer Brother: "Well then! All of you who are here and are representatives... come with me."
Metal Man (GM): He goes to walk towards the castle.
Lance: "We represent what could be considered diplomats under the right conditions, yes."
Marley: "I'll sit this one out. I ain't no diplomat. I'm just a sailor. Please do ask where we can get parts, though..."
Lance follows.
Digifanatic: *nods and walks on.*
Deloth stays out of this. He's a fighter, not a talker.
Aribar goes to follow the Hammer Brother... He has served as a diplomat once or twice in the past and his expertise may be needed... The elf is also curious as to what is going on here and also wonders what ramifications will come from representing Mobius.
Metal Man (GM): The Questers walk in towards the castle.
Digifanatic: *He isn't the best diplomat, but he began the conversation so he shouldn't back down.*
Metal Man (GM): Walking inside, there is a table. A relatively decent one.
Lance: *Has a bit more diplomatic skill.*
Hammer Brother: "Please sit down... his Kingship will be with you in a moment."
Metal Man (GM): There's strategic maps of the region poorly carved into the wall.
Digifanatic: "Thanks." *sits down and glances at the maps.*
Lance finds a seat.
Aribar finds a seat and glances about the chamber, absorbing his surroundings.*
Metal Man (GM): http://ssq.metalman88.com/marioregionmap.png The chamber is lit with torches; Koopas stand guard on all sides. A simple mushroom soup is served. Within a few moments, the Questers hear a helicopter noise. Bowser himself walks in. He wears a crown and looks very shiny and regal.
Bowser: "Hm. Some new punks in my land, I see. You say they come from Moblivious? What the heck is that?"
Digifanatic: *stops eating his soup when Bowser arrives.*
Metal Man (GM): He turns to face the Questers, sitting down at the head of the table.
Bowser: "So... you guys came here in a boat being chased by some sorta aliens. Whatcha here for?"
Aribar: "Mobius, your worshipness."
Bowser: "My people are very busy... busy with things that are impo--Mobius, right."
Digifanatic: "This was the first shoreline we encountered. Your Hammer Brother approached us and we kindly asked for admittance."
Lance: "We are just passing though your wonderful kingdom."
Bowser: "Yes, I see. So. You come here to establish contact? Trade? Land? ...Passing through, eh? We don't get many tourists. Except for some other people we found wandering the molten wastelands. They looked like you punks. I assume you'd want to see them?"
Digifanatic: "Huh?"
Lance: "We would not mind meeting them, no."
Bowser: "Don't worry, I assumed they were an advance party, so I just let them rest and stuff. Because ever since the first three Mushroom Wars, I've learned not to harm potential... allies."
Digifanatic: "Hmm, well, your Kingship, any allies we could encounter would be nice."
Metal Man (GM): A pipe opens up, and out appears... two people.
Keikyoku (GM): One of the two people seems to be some kinda hedgehog type thing with white spikey fur, studded metal knuckles, and some sorta fancy floating boots.
Keikyoku: "Who're these losers?"
Bowser: "I assume that, even if they aren't with you punks, they may well be here instead of using all my food and lounge space. 'Cuz I need it for some other things..."
Aribar: "Greetings." *The elf looks over the two new arrivals. Upon seeing the hedgehog he wonders if they truely are some sort of advance diplomatic party from Mobius.*
Michael Kent: A tall man would walk slightly to the side and behind the second figure. He seemed pensive, lost in his own little world as he stepped in short strides to make up for the slowness of his compatriots. He was dressed in a simple outfit of sleeveless blue tunic with a silver breastplate over the chest, proper fitting white pants with metal thigh guards, greaves, and plate boots.
Digifanatic: .oO(I'll hold my case for a while on the hedge-guy.)
Michael Kent: His arms were bare, but plate gauntlets covered up his elbows. A simple broadsword was at his hip, a large shield covered his back. He had short, clean brown hair and goatee, bright blue eyes, and a silver chain that fell into his tunic.
Keikyoku: walks over to bowser. "Thank you for your hospitality sir." *bows.*
Lance looks at the shiny dude and pushes up his glasses a bit.
Michael Kent: "You sent for us, your majesty?"
Bowser: "Er, yes." *He nods to Kei and Kent.* "These people may know you, or they may not. Either way, you can be with them from now on. I have very important stuff to do... ...which reminds me."
Keikyoku: *Starts walking toward the exit.*
Metal Man (GM): He leans on his chair.
Michael Kent: "...excuse me?"
Bowser: "I'm in this little problem with the Mushroom Kingdom. Not a war, but the punks don't understand my latest idea."
Lance: "Which is?"
Michael Kent looks confusedly at Bowser before letting his gaze look over the group in question.
Keikyoku: *Stops a couple feet from the exit and listens.*
Dragoshi: *Just listens. A-yep.* >_>
Aribar looks towards Bowser and wonders what the Koopa King is planning.
Bowser: "I've found a new wife, which is remotely related to their royalty, named Daisy, of Sarasaland. She agreed to marry me and so did the kings of their realm, but Mario and Peach refuse to believe it. But... if you, random diplomats from Mohawk, or whatever the place is, endorse it, then I can get on in with their country and we can work together as a unified land... with peace and equality for all the punks in all the places with the people and stuff." Bowser's servants nod in agreement to what he says. Of course they do, since he sort of rules them.
Michael Kent frowns slowly...
Bowser: "Of course, my days of brutality are over, so, I won't be angry if you punks disagree."
Digifanatic: "Your Highness, that is an intriguing proposition."
Bowser: "Of course, agreeing with me comes with many bonuses. Including your own properties with serfs on my land n' stuff."
Lance: "Why don't they believe Daisy?"
Bowser: "Eh. They're suspicious of people from Sarasaland. And of course they're suspicious of me. I've been in three wars with them."
Lance: "Hmm, let me reword that. Why does Peach/Mario not believe Daisy?"
Aribar wonders if they can truly believe what Bowser has to say..*
Metal Man (GM): Digi sees the map on the wall must be incomplete. Maybe Bowser has a more complete one?
Bowser: "Uh... they're jealous. Yeah. They've known eachother forever and still aren't married."
Michael Kent: "...King Bowser."
Digifanatic: "Excuse me, Your Highness, but I'm looking around and I don't see Sarasaland on any of these maps."
Lance: .oO(Right...)
Digifanatic: "May we please have a more complete one that isn't on one of the walls?"
Bowser: "Oh! Well... that's a terrible mistake." He scribbles it in with a claw next to Wario Land. "See, that's where it is, but this stupid map I made one random day without thinking about it."
Michael Kent: .o(Flaws within flaws...)
Bowser: "Yeah. I done made a big mistake there." *Sits down.*
Digifanatic: .oO(Hmm... buy that or don't buy that?)
Bowser: "I'll make you a new and improved map eventually. My last printer sorta retired."
Digifanatic: "Ah."
Dragoshi: "'k."
Lance: "So, anyway. slightly curious, if you want to marry and you're both royalty, what is stopping you?"
Digifanatic: *Tries to determine if Bowser is accurate in placing Sarasaland on the map.* *Or if he's just slapping it on some rigged locale to screw with the Questers.*
Michael Kent: "I agree with this fellow. What the people of one kingdom say is of little means to force you for or against marrying this Princess Daisy."
Bowser: "Well, it doesn't mean anything if they ignore it like punks. I won't be able to properly unite our countries, and then it'll just be a marriage. Which is fine, except there's so many good things I can do!"
Metal Man (GM): Accuracy as far as an already scribbly map...
Michael Kent slowly moves around to the other side of the room, having come in on the right side through said warp pipe. As he walks, he continues talking...
Metal Man (GM): Digi thinks probably he could find out himself by taking a boat there.
Michael Kent: "If you wish to join forces with this Princess Peach and Mario, then joining with another kingdom is ill advised."
Bowser: "Er, anyway. I don't need to tell you about this nonstop. You'll decide sooner or later... ...though I must warn you, if you want to go to the Northern continent, it might be expensive... Ah, yes, but Sarasaland is remotely considered an ally of theirs, and during a war it became a protectorate of theirs... so if I marry into it, I can then make my land part of theirs and work out the other way around with the fair Mushroom Kings, who agree with me."
Michael Kent: "...if I may ask, your majesty... why is it these past three wars happened?"
Bowser: "Mario went into my land and began killing everybody. No reason. He just walked in and began smashing everything in sight."
Michael Kent slowly arched his eyebrow.
Bowser: "Then he had a brother. He also did it... heck, even Peach and Toad smashed stuff. Then he got a Dinosaur, and killed my children too... er, children by another wife, whom is also gone, sad to say." He looks down.
Michael Kent: "...if they are such a bother to your glorious kingdom, then why do you wish to join with them?"
Bowser: "Well, recently we've been playing sports and talking, and, we've realized Wario is our true enemy. Problem is they're royalty-based like my place. I can't join with them without a proper link."
Digifanatic: "Well, if what you're showing us is true, Sarasaland is a big base for you."
Michael Kent: "Then why not ask for an alliance rather than a union?"
Bowser: "And Daisy just so happened to love me, so... it's pretty good..."
Digifanatic: "Being right next to Wario Land..."
Bowser: "They won't ally with me without some sort of link either. The Mushroom Kings insist. The Kings are sort of like sub-leaders, and if they agree on something then it can be blocked. Not so much the other direction."
Digifanatic: "So this is turning into a full merge or bust. Am I correct, Your Highness?"
Bowser: "Yes. And... yes, Sarasaland is racked by Wario attacks. I need their help... we do, me and Daisy."
Lance: "Well, first things first. We have to visit Daisy and give her a hand."
Digifanatic: "Is she here in the castle or over on Sarasaland?"
Bowser: "Oh. She's in Bowser Land currently, after the last siege... I can take you to her, but I'll be a bit... bad back and all. Few modes of transportation exist after Mario destroyed the Star Road."
Michael Kent: "I am sorry, your majesty, but if the other kings wish not for this joining you speak of, then there is little you can do. Perhaps seeking a different way is the choice you should venture."
Bowser: "Ah, but they will accept if outside diplomats agree. They told me they would, at least. They probably did it to make it impossible, as there are no other sides but the universally ignored Wario one... But now you are here, see?"
Digifanatic: "Correct..."
Bowser: "And it's in writing... so your support would make it a sure thing."
Dragoshi: "Yep..."
Bowser: "You could then further make it certain to Mario and Peach, as neutral observers, that it's all fair."
Michael Kent: "I am sorry, your majesty, but I do not have the authority to do such a thing. I am merely a messenger of His Word. Nothing more, nothing less."
Bowser: "Er, right. I mean the people from that other place named Mohawk. You can tag along though, since you know stuff and I don't need more soldiers."
Lance: "Before I agree to this, Bowser I have one question. Did you really have nothing to do with the wars? You keep on remarking on your changes after all."
Michael Kent looks to the group of people, his eyebrow arching slowly.
Bowser: "Well, there was a king named Wart, whom I once was allies with. After the second war leaked out of my land into his and he was killed, I discovered he had, indeed, imprisoned many people wrongly... That punk hid it from me all this time. But he got his just deserts. So the second war ended with me accepting control of his forces due to the alliance, then pledging not to use them again."
Digifanatic: "I see."
Lance: "And the first?"
Bowser: "Mario ran in and began killing my troops, thinking they were transformed Mushroom people. Psychedelic flowers and mushrooms were later blamed for the cause of his... temporary insanity."
Lance arches an eyebrow.
Digifanatic just blinks his eyes twice and goes with it...
Bowser: "Let me guess. You want to know what the third one was about, punks. My kids stole the neat things I had made and Wart's forces."
Dragoshi: .oO(I can see that turning sour fast.)
Bowser: "Then Mario, after having gone insane on yet more mushrooms... and new things, like leaves... ...even to the point of pretending to be a Hammer Brother, then killing all my children... Thought incorrectly I was with them and beat me up too."
Lance: "Before you mentioned Peach also beat up your troops?"
Bowser: "The war ended when Peach told a bad joke to him, and it caused him to snap and pass out until the drugs wore off."
Digifanatic: .oO(Wow... this is just screwed up.)
Bowser: "Peach came in to beat up Wart's troops, which became mine, in the second war."
Lance: "Ah."
Bowser: "There was a... fourth small incident, as some fool revived my children and they once again got themselves killed. Luckily, I had an escape helicopter this time. It wasn't a full war, thankfully. Mario began to believe he was a superhero, though, in a strange turn for the worst. However, he took a vacation and even that wore off."
Michael Kent: "...I am surprised you haven't mounted an attack of your own, your majesty."
Bowser: "However, even with no mushrooms, he had a flashback inside his castle, and hallucinated that paintings were worlds and that Peach was trapped inside a giant glass window."
Dragoshi: "..."
Bowser: "I am told he didn't stop until he broke every single piece of furniture inside the castle."
Dragoshi: "Did everything turn into tang at the end? In his hallucination, I mean?"
Lance: "Bowser, why would a princess love a man like that?"
Bowser: "No. He was muttering that 'L is real 2041' however. Several doomsday cults now predict the end of the world as happening on this date."
Digifanatic: "You know... maybe it's better we don't have a druggie-slash-loony-slash-prince..."
Bowser: "I don't know. I asked her once, and she became so angry that fire flew from her mouth and she stabbed me with an umbrella. That was the last time I asked her. It was very painful."
Dragoshi: "..."
Bowser: "It goes on, of course. Every so often Mario has a flashback, or maybe he's fixated by something which looks interesting."
Michael Kent: "You seem to put a lot of blame on this Mario."
Bowser: "Well, yes. He eats nearly anything, regardless of whether it is edible, and his first reaction to sentient life is 'Can I smash it flat?' I mean. I like to smash things too, like, mean punks from the moon."
Dragoshi: "...Mean punks from the moon?"
Bowser: "Yes. There's space men who wear strange outfits... and goggles. They keep telling me I should salute their leader. I just smush them flat."
Dragoshi: "I see."
Metal Man (GM): He takes out a flattened one. It has goggles and its hands are in an 'X-salute'... it has an 'X-naut' insignia on its chest.
Dragoshi: "...Oh. Those guys."
Bowser: "For some reason, when I flatten them, they remain like this."
Lance: "Anyway, Even though your history lesson may be erm, slightly biased, I think we can agree you have changed. I think the group would agree that we would like to meet Daisy first though."
Michael Kent immediately looks to Lance, his eyebrow arched confusedly... that made no sense...
Bowser: "Yes, well. We can visit her then." He walks over to his copter. "Oh, right... you punks will have to walk there. Sorry. Just take the path to the right along the coast. It's a nice little castle. See ya there." He hops in his copter and flies off. The Koopas salute.
Dragoshi: "Alright, then. Thanks."
Michael Kent: "...well. That's that, then."
Lance: "Bah, he ran off before we could ask about boat parts. Anyway, we should go collect Deloth and head on our way."
Michael Kent: "I believe that I will be accompanying you, then. This situation is growing... more confusing... I should go with you to explore this further."
Lance: "Hmm, speaking of confusing." *walks up to one of the koopas.* "Excuse me, do you have some paper and a pen? I would like to copy that map."
Metal Man (GM): They hand Lance a paper and a pen... silently. So he can easily copy the map... and... the session pauses here.

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