Date: 5:55:39 PM, February 9th to 6:38:34 PM, February 9th to 8:08:46 PM, February 9th;
5:25:16 PM, February 11th to 6:25:35 PM, February 11th;
6:36:41 PM, February 15th to 9:21:55 PM, February 15th, 2013.
Metal Man (GM): Nintendus HQ
Ederick would be at HQ. He would have been there for a long time. A long, long time.
Bored out of his mind.
Eventually....
Continuation
The warp appears.
Out steps Xavier.
Right before Ederick, in fact.
Ederick Holmes is sitting there. Not even staring at wet paint. The homeworld of the Questers was... A warp. Apparently boring until the boss appears.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Ederick... I am so sorry to have left you behind so many times. I was... out of my mind. Things have changed. For the better. But I need your help again, because..." *He smirks.* "Somebody said that I'm not allowed on Alsa."
"...But I don't intend to let Garrick die foolishly."
"...And you are an Alsan."
Ederick Holmes: "I think I missed something. Or many somethings there."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Many somethings. Time flows differently in Alsa. It's a long story, but basically Garrick doesn't want us dead. He wants us... er... me off of Alsa."
"You're my ace card, though, because you are an Alsan."
"He can't tell you anything."
Ederick Holmes: "Why would Garrick have a change in heart?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Alsa beat the stupid out of him. From what little I could tell, he tried to go all 'kill everything' and Alsa all but killed him for it. Repeatedly."
"He looks like an old, tired, weary man."
Ederick Holmes: "Huh. So is he now friendly to Alsans? Working with them?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Not entirely. He doesn't seem to get that they don't consider him their savior."
Ederick Holmes leans back in a chair and rubs his hand over his thin beard. "So he's fine with Questers as long as they're stuck here?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. What I foresee is this."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier generates a hologram of Alsa.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Borne is here. Illian is here. Garrick is all over the place. Here's the problem."
"Garrick sees himself as the savior of all of Alsa."
"Borne sees him as an fool to be ignored."
"And Sergeant Levis has sworn to kill him."
"Sergeant Levis, who killed Julian's attempt to do what Garrick is doing now, if you had that in your history classes on Alsa."
"Garrick is in over his head here, trying to save the planet from itself. It's going to kill him."
"Normally I wouldn't care, but I saw option B."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier then moves some people around to represent a "Nintendus" pool.
Ederick Holmes: "Go on."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Razor and Garrick work with me like the old days. We form the return of the old guard of Questers. Together we make an agreement to remove Illian's forces from Alsa, which will also appease the Alsans, who hate both us and Garrick. Garrick can then retire. The problem is..."
"Garrick doesn't get it."
"So I need you, next time I find Garrick, to explain to Garrick the Alsan opinion of him trying to take responsibility for all of you."
"Because, last I checked, you didn't need some 'savior' from another planet."
Ederick Holmes snaps his fingers and leans forward. "Hah. Call 'im a Quester. That's what he's trying to be."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "..." *He chuckles.* "Of course! And I am the final authority on who is or isn't one."
"So they will believe me, especially since they hate his guts... even Illian might be fooled."
"Yes. Now, a second matter, before I get to work on some things..."
"Borne." *He would show an image of Borne. The original one, and the current one.*
"Sergeant Levis let slip that Borne had 'Gone Mad Man' due to his body."
"And that he was going to use something to cure him."
"This leads me to wonder. If perhaps what he did relevant to you was him going insane."
"...And that then you might be able to re-integrate if he were to not be 'Mad Man' anymore in his behavior."
"Since... the old Borne merely wanted to defend his territory against arguably insane and evil mercenaries."
"If you could get in there, then we could work together to keep Borne out of our way, and isolate and remove people like Levis who mindlessly attack all perceived threats."
Ederick Holmes raises an eyebrow. "Not quite sure if I understand here. You want me to try and buddy up with Borne?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Not quite." *He would point to the old Borne.* "You were hired by Borne, right... before he went insane? The issue is that it seems he's gone subtly off the rails. That's why he reacted to that situation with you and me so... carelessly."
"But if that went away, then perhaps you wouldn't be so much buddying up with him, as being able to do what you do now. Just also in alliance with GUN."
"Since our interests are not so disparate. We don't want Garrick to try and claim Alsa as his own."
"I want Garrick to retire, myself. The man's too old."
Ederick Holmes: "I can try my best. Borne, ah, isn't exactly my favorite, but I can try."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Noted. We'll see how it goes. With that, I'll be off to deal with some other errands. You may leave for Alsa to check it for yourself, or if you would like my help, I can... figure something out. Oh... yes."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier changes form.
Suddenly he looks like a Deathguard.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I forgot to mention I stole a shape-shifting mask."
Ederick Holmes: "And whaddoyacallthat?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "The Great Shape-Changing Power. I can change into anyone I know. Limited by how much I know them."
"And I can't do it for more than about 5 hours before my juice is gone."
"Fighting drains it even faster."
"But basically, if I'm very very careful, I can sneak onto Alsa without Garrick noticing me."
"So. I figure, I should give you some time to process this, then we can discuss again a plan of action beyond the basis."
Ederick Holmes: "Yeah. Uh, let me think about this and try to process what just happened. This is, um, different."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I'll be back. ...Not the Arnold Schwarzenegger way."
Metal Man (GM): He walks off.
End Scene
Metal Man (GM): (((((( Another thing (Intro) ))))))
Xavier is at his desk, when he idly takes out a scanner.
He looks at it.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Hm. That's odd. Potential energy over here."
Metal Man (GM): He points at something on the map, and an image of Astos shows up.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Ancient lab... energy... 400 years... ...Meh. I needed something to do this afternoon anyway."
Metal Man (GM): He would then slip the dex into his pocket and get up, then type into his wrist. He'd rip a portal out of thin air, then walk into it.
Astos
Here lies a lab, among what looks much like Mars, if Mars had golden-ish rocks everywhere and looked like the bottom of the Grand Canyon.
It is all rather ancient. Xavier would step out of the portal.
Xavier is about 7 feet tall, wearing armor top to bottom, looks like a man wearing chromed plates everywhere, and has huge shoulderpads, a cape, blue kneepads, and a somewhat eldritch glowing face behind his visor. He walks chunkily and loudly towards the lab, not sure what is there.
Florina: *A short, dark purple-haired girl clothed in strange, blue and red themed attire with a witch hat was wandering around seemingly aimlessly. A floating wand stood at her side as she turned to face this newcomer.* "...Hi."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "..." *He would take out his Smash Dex, and scan her, then look at the readout.* "Hm. Yes. You look like somebody I could use as a Quester. I'm not sure who you are though. What's your name?" *He would spin the dex around.* "I'm Xavier Ridgecrest, leader of the Questers. We take interdimensional crime, and then we blow it up. ...You're good at blowing things up, right?"
Florina: *The girl turned around for a few seconds to look back at the lab before returning to looking at Xavier.* "...This is the workshop of the Great Witch Florina. How can I help you? I'm afraid there aren't any Questers for sale here. If Quester is a food, I would very much like to have some. I... can blow things up, sure."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Witches... I had something like a witch in my organization before." *He would cradle his fingers.* "Sorry for the confusion, I'm a Quester, I don't need to buy any Questers. But I was thinking... maybe you could work for me. I could pay you, and you could blow things up. Or... make things? You said something about a workshop."
Florina: "You can pay me in food. Keep me fed, and you can count on me as an ally, X... av... ier Ridgecrest."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Food, huh?" *He would chuckle.* "We have an entire kitchen stocked with food all the time."
*His stomach rumbles* "...I really should have eaten lunch before warping out here."
Florina: "Can you tell me where this is? I've been asleep for so long, you see... nothing is familiar."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, one second. It's a long story... let me figure out how to phrase it... Ah, yes. This is Astos. The remains of Erastos. My home planet. It was destroyed 400ish years ago. But this lab somehow survived. Lucky you, because it must have been hidden pretty well. This is... a bit of a canyon. I think it was buried under a ton of rock that was then destroyed in the explosion when the Time Cops blew this place to bits."
"You clearly are either a former native, or someone who came here after the destruction to hide..."
"I figured you would be handy with some powers to help me save the universe."
Editor's Note: Of course, 'Erastos' and 'Astos' would later be non-canon, leading to one of the few parts of this game that didn't really influence anything.
Florina: "Oh dear. Lucky me! Anyway, the person I'm looking for doesn't seem to be here anymore anyway, and there's no food anymore. I don't know what this Universe is, but it sounds like some hard work to save."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. It involves debating philosophy with maniacs and shooting things with magic and guns. I can teach you whatever you are missing... ...but before I go any further, we should leave this place. It's not entirely safe here... ...do you need to get anything before we go?"
Florina: "Um... I just got out of bed and got dressed. Nothing else was there anymore. I'm good to go, but... where are we going?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, to the Stadium. Where we coordinate saving the universe."
"It's a sports stadium... which was originally used for the heroes of the universe to fight one another... until that nearly destroyed the universe."
"Now instead we use it to plan our ways of saving the universe with a number of rooms that have data on past events, and also simulator rooms where we can practice fighting."
Florina: "Oh, yes, that place! Do pardon my mind, those years of sleep have built up quite the grogginess."
*She laughed awkwardly.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "It's okay." *He would chuckle.* "I'm prone to fits of complete insanity. And yet, nobody ever left my command, so... you're safe."
"Let's just say whatever you do, probably has been done by me... worse..."
Florina: "Don't badmouth yourself like that, young man." *She didn't look a day over 20.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Young? I wish. I think I'm at least 50. I forget... time travel messes with your mind..."
"Though I have to wonder... do you have some sort of age-reducing magic? You don't seem that old yourself..."
"I could probably use some. There's a friend and... he's rather old and... acting like an old man..."
"It might be easier if he were just not an old man!"
Florina: "Mas---I mean, I've always subscribed to the idea that you should always have self-confidence if you want to lead anything. Don't put yourself down. And... I am 481. Unfortunately the... uh, sleep has damaged my memories, and I must spend time recovering my old spells and strength."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Hm. 481." *He would calculate.* "That's the 5th time I've been age-beaten by a Quester. I guess it's normal when most of my other allies are dragons and long-lived races. You should fit in well. I just hope one of my insane fits doesn't disturb you too much. It probably won't. You want confidence..." *He chuckles.* "You should see it... but not here. Time to go!" *Creates a warp* "...Ladies first. If you're worried... go ahead and peek inside before crossing inside fully."
Florina: "Um, yes. I too have... encountered things like that in my travels. But you will have to refresh my memory..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, I started my Quester career with no idea who I was, so, I'll be happy to help you with that memory thing whenever I find out more about who you are."
Florina: "Um, well, let's see... this is... also something I'm familiar with." *Her voice suddenly becomes almost angelic as she speaks an unknown language.* "Famfa." *The wand next to her turns around and positions itself under her as she sits down.* "I don't like walking." *She looked at the portal and hesitated for a second before going inside.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Me neither. I just thought... well... surfing on a golf club might scare you."
*He moonwalks into the portal.*
Metal Man (GM): The portal vanishes. You're now in a hallway filled with images of strange people you've never seen before.
It's the "Hall of Fame", leading down to a door that has the word "WOLFMAN'S OFFICE" written on it. The WOLF part of the sign has had a hastily attached, smaller sign that says "METAL" stuck over it.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "This... is the Stadium."
Metal Man (GM): He would go to lead Florina to the office.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I am its mas--er, leader. I am... Xavier Ridgecrest, AKA Metal Man, AKA The Insane Person Who Hits People With A Golf Club."
"Don't mind the third title. It's just what my enemies call me."
Florina: "Hmm, you said there was food around this stadium place?" *she continued to float instead of walk next to Xavier, pretending not to be looking curiously around the place to absorb it all into her memories.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. This way."
Metal Man (GM): He would walk down a side hallway, towards... a kitchen. A massive... massive Stadium-serving kitchen.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "We keep this stocked to full, because... because... ...I forgot to discontinue the catering service and nobody seemed to notice! There is enough food here, in this and the other kitchens, for about... a full Stadiumful of people."
Florina: "Splendid. I was always told by ma---by my friends that such places existed, but I never thought I would see a food room like this before." *She was barely containing her excitement.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well." *He would shrug.* "It's nearly indefinite and free here. We have worlds where food simply grows on its own without intervention. It's odd, but highly useful. You may eat whatever you see here, because... it doesn't get used otherwise." *He motions to the variety of food, ranging from normal food to strange things like Maxim tomatoes and RPG item-food laying around.*
Florina: "Uu... that sounds lovely." *She was entranced by the very idea.* "But there's a catch, isn't there. To having access to all of these treats?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes." *He nods.* "You must help me defeat bad people. It's rather simple."
Metal Man (GM): He opens a window, aiming out into the Stadium proper.
A holographic target shows up.
He... is holding a Golf club. It shouldn't even be able to shoot anything.
He makes a finger pulling gesture and it fires a red beam, which sets the target on fire.
It even makes a sound like a laser gun.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "There are people out there who endanger the universe. We set them on fire."
Florina: *She looked bewildered at this.* "Fire... I can do fire. But, I need to concentrate a lot for that. You won't be disappointed if it goes off without a hitch, I assure you."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "What else can you do? Just so I know what you're best at."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier makes a weird gesture. Suddenly, his wrist glows, then his target slows down.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I can mess with time."
Florina: *She paused for a moment.* "I have, er. Fire. And... energy of... some sort. I can mold it into a spear. I can also make hurt go away and also make things hurt less. I have more, naturally! But I need to recover my powers first."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Excellent. Wear this badge so that people know I hired you. I'll get back to you for some training."
Metal Man (GM): He gives you a red octagon with a yellow Q in the center.
Then he summons another target.
Florina: "Er. Thanks. Of course this is needed." *She wore it on her hat.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Feel free to show me what you can do."
Florina: "Stand back, young man." *She cleared her throat, and the angelic voice returned, again speaking in a strange language, almost like chanting. A small, fiery sphere appeared above her as she continued to sing. This went on for several minutes, and the sphere grew larger and larger.*
Metal Man (GM): He stands back, staring.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Huh... a singing mage. That burns things. I could get used to this."
Florina: *However, she looked fatigued increasingly over time, until she spoke the final words:* "Neath Fayra." *The red, glowing sphere shot toward the target like a bullet, engulfing it before exploding in fiery death around the whole area. She was out of breath and laid down on the floating wand.*
Metal Man (GM): Xavier would idly glance to the fiery destruction, picking up an on fire pear and idly eating it.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Me gusta."
Florina: "H-how was that, young man? Such a spell is possible for me." *However... she clearly burned through all her energy to do just that.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "It's pretty good. You should fit in fine."
"Feel free to rest. I'll come back to you in a bit. The food here is yours." *He gestures to the other 9/10th of the kitchen that didn't get a bit toasty from the fire.* "I gotta talk to the other Questers and get ready for something. Feel free to call me if you need me."
Metal Man (GM): On that note, I think we'll consider this scene concluded. Now I gotta get ready for work.
Florina: "...Okay, see you, Child of Man." *She took a bite of a muffin while watching him leave.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...That's Metal of Man, if you want to keep it correct." *He smirks, and walks off.*
Metal Man (GM): Last time on SSQ:
Valron: "You have to take in account though... The Questers were goddamn idiots."
Illian MacGregor: "Borne has no lieutenants. There's one point of failure--him. Remove Borne and his empire is gone."
Valron: "...In any case. We'll make an alliance Echidna first, then the Mushroom Republic."
Metal Man (GM): Continuation
Still at Quester HQ, Valron has set his course--to get allies. The Echidna group, then the Mushroom Republic.
Illian MacGregor: "You'll need to take a ship... the warp systems are offline due to the block. To ensure you aren't hampered, I'm going to allow you to ride the Eternal Dauntless there."
"The question is, who shall you have accompany you?"
"I'd suggest at least two others."
Valron: "Mmh. I'll probably take The Arbiter along, and... Where is Marley, anyways?"
Illian MacGregor: "Last I checked, he was at a bar in Capital City. I tried to tell him to stop going there, but he made some arcane gesture at me and walked off on his own."
"This planet and its inhabitants continue to mystify me."
Valron: "...'Arcane gesture'?"
Illian MacGregor: "He sort of waved his hands at me and walked away. I don't really know what it was about. The inhabitants here..." *He shrugs.* "Not like the Solarians I'm used to."
Valron: "...I see. May as well check out the bar in Capital City, then. May as well see if I can't snap him out of it or somethin'."
Illian MacGregor: "Hm. Very well." *He would cross his arms.* "Better take this then."
Metal Man (GM): He would hand you a strange badge... ...it has a large D on it.
Valron stares at the badge, before taking it.
Illian MacGregor: "Part of the alliance condition. You are technically one of his 'Defenders' when in his city. You are not obligated to follow his orders, but anything you do is considered ordered by me. That is the only way you can keep your weapons. If you plan anything more... sneaky..."
"Then you should leave your weapons here and not take the badge."
"Up to you."
*He sulks* "It makes little difference, since the last time I told anyone what to do, they defected to Xavier."
Valron: "...Wasn't intending to do anything involving sneaky for the moment. Far too much can go wrong, there. If need be, I was probably going to try and smack some sense into him, but that was a last resort type of deal."
Illian MacGregor: "Marley is a second class citizen, so no one will blink if you hit him." *He would then blink.* "Well, feel free to board the Dauntless when ready."
Metal Man (GM): I'll just fast forward to the bar when you're ready.
Valron: *He blinks as well.* "That's... a little disturbing, but I'll keep that in mind." *He would rub the back of his head before going to board the Dauntless. Fast-forward powers go!*
Metal Man (GM): You walk into the bar, with the badge.
The people go to scowl at you, then realize you have that badge and instead hide like Borne himself was in there.
Marley sits at his table, several containers of alcohol spilled about.
He stares, almost frothing at the mouth.
Marley: "God damned Questers took away my dignity, now all I have is a cup of gin and a hallucination of Dragoshi!"
Valron: *Rolls his eyes a bit as he scans the bar, looking for... there he is. He then goes to approach Marley.* "Good lord, man, you look like someone decided to put out a trash fire with a bomb."
Marley: "Hoy-yoy-yoy! A drink and a pinch, and a bottle filled of rye! What brings you here, Godoshi? Are you here to get my fishing boat back?"
"Wait, that's it. You're here to take me to the old folk's home! Ahah! I knew Illian had a plan for me!"
Valron: "...Not to the old folk's home, but I did intend to take you along with me. Got some stuff that needs to be done and I'd figured you'd be of some help. ...Though we proooobably need to get you... well, not looking messed up first."
Marley: "War, bar... gar... you want me to come with you? What is this, that time you were with the Questers? Nobody wants me! Nobody! What possible use do I have to you? What are you even doing?"
"Do you even do anything anymore, or do you just... exist...?"
Valron: "Well, I did intend to look for you earlier, but... I am absolutely swamped with work. You know how it is with Illian's group."
Marley: "What am I going to do, too. Drink in the direction of your enemies?"
Valron: "Mmh. Wanted to kickstart an alliance with the Echidnas."
Metal Man (GM): He drops the mug he's holding.
Marley: "Nnnn... nnnshhhh shhh shhh. Don't say that word here. Don't."
Metal Man (GM): He would go to gesture towards the exit and take you with him.
Marley: "We have to say that somewhere else."
Valron: "Right. I meant... make enchiladas."
Metal Man (GM): The bartender almost seems like they're going to hit some sort of alert, when Marley throws a huge gold coin on the bar.
Valron: "I've taken quite a few blows to the head. Honest mistake."
Marley: "Yes. Delicious enchiladas. That's all that was discussed here."
Metal Man (GM): The bartender nods and pockets the coin.
Marley then goes to take you to a shady looking alley.
Valron nods, following Marley out.
Metal Man (GM): Now that you're in the alley, Marley... straightens up his hair and his outfit, like he wasn't drunk at all.
Marley: "I'm going to let you in on a secret. I was there pretending to be messed up to spy on Borne. His men are really bad at keeping secrets. I know the entire situation with them and the Echidna. And his plans in general. I just didn't know if Illian had the spine to deal with it."
Valron: *Nods, smiling a little.* "Illian's still the saddest elephant in the world, but. He's trying, at least."
Marley: "Things are looking pretty bad for my friends, though. I'm sometimes actually drunk in there because of it. The Questers @#$%ed up this world ten ways to Tibet, and we're all going to hell with them if we aren't quick."
Valron: "Yeah... You can certainly say that, again."
Marley: "Now, let's get out of here, before--"
Metal Man (GM): The way out of the alley is blocked.
Commander Borne: "Before what."
Marley: "The delicious enchiladas get cold!"
Commander Borne: "." *He sneers.* "The spying was in both directions. I knew the moment you weren't in there acting so poorly that even a first-year child could detect your lies something was going to go down."
Marley: "But the--"
Commander Borne: "The bartender is dead."
Metal Man (GM): He holds up a glowing, smoking gun.
Valron: "...Welp."
Commander Borne: "You could join them, but I am of a smarter nature than that. The answer is simple. Join me." *He would fork a thumb behind himself.*
"Illian is an alien, an invader. He does not belong here. He doesn't understand this place."
Valron: "...Huh. Offering an alliance? Interesting."
Commander Borne: "The two of you are natural sons of Alsa... even if one of you isn't originally from here."
Marley: "What... why would you ever offer to work with me? You've wanted nothing but--"
Commander Borne: "That wasn't me. That was the Mad Man corruption."
Valron: .oO(He does bring up a point) "...Corruption?"
Metal Man (GM): He pulls up his sleeve, revealing an injection site.
Commander Borne: "The corruption. These bodies drive the owners mad. I created an antidote. I gave it to three of my men. Well. Two of mine and one of Marley's old men."
"One of them was Sloan, so that was wasted. The other was Berges, who forgot by accident. Or I think he did."
"I'm having that part investigated."
"And the final one... was Levis.."
"Who came back, having killed Garrick Fy'aar for good."
"And then surprised me with the antidote. The insanity is gone now. I do not desire rule over all of Alsa anymore."
"But rather an alliance which will make Alsa a unified planet. Not a stupid Quester-driven Republic, but a series of independent countries."
Valron: "A noble goal."
Commander Borne: "Your mission is to go to the Echidna, is it not?"
Valron: "Indeed."
Commander Borne: "Go as you would before. But then bring them this peace offering."
Metal Man (GM): He would take out an ancient Echidna book, encrusted in gold.
Commander Borne: "The holy tome that describes the machinery that their great Emperor Kragok made. The one GUN stole from them and then caused the collapse of their society a while ago with."
"The one we used to make our technology superior to everyone else with."
Metal Man (GM): He tosses it into Marley's hands.
Valron: "...Well, now. That's certainly quite the offering."
Commander Borne: "It is theirs again. I have no need to weaken a potential part of the Unified Alsan Forces. Convince them to join the UAF, and work for me. Illian needn't even know."
Marley: "But... I can't..." *He just sits there, confused.*
Commander Borne: "You can't forget who I used to be, Marley. I defeated Jack and you went into hiding, and I let you. Your most peaceful time was before the Questers came and I quietly ran things."
Marley: "But the coup!"
Commander Borne: "That was the beginning of the Madness showing in me. I had underestimated my ability to prevent it."
Marley: "..."
Commander Borne: "Rest assured. I did believe it was the best thing at the time. But these days, I am my old self again. Now... do whatever it is... on one condition."
Metal Man (GM): He brings up the gun again.
Valron: "...Yes?"
Commander Borne: "Don't enter that bar again, and don't subvert my people again. It won't just be them who dies if you try sneaky Questerisms in this country."
"...Now get out of here as you planned." *He would tromp off.*
Marley: "..."
Valron: "...Duly noted." *He nods in response, before looking back at Marley* "Well, this certainly adds a new layer of sorts..."
Marley: "I still don't believe he's the same Borne he used to be, but this book is... is..." *He flips through it.* "I thought it was destroyed! We have no choice. What would Illian offer to match this?"
"Even if he betrayed the Echidna, with this holy book, they could defeat GUN anyway!"
"We must hurry to secure the Echidna for this alliance... if he says what he says then... we could possibly take control of the land Illian is on if we convince him to leave."
Valron: "A plan I can certainly get behind."
Marley: "Well, let's go." *He would go to walk to the Dauntless, outside, in the airport.*
Valron: "Though, I do hope you don't mind some of the new friends I've picked up along the way..." *He would follow Marley.*
Marley: "Based on what he said, you're free to use anyone at all. He simply objects to Illian ruling parts of Alsa."
"Which is... well... obvious, to me. Why should an alien rule Alsa?"
Valron: *He nods* "Completely understandable, yes. Besides, maybe it'll help if Illian has less on his plate, anyways."
*Goes to board the Dauntless* "In any case, before we head off and get things done, I kinda need to someone else up, first."
Marley: "To Angel Is--oh." *He shrugs.* "I'll be waiting then."
Metal Man (GM): So, next up... who do you choose?
Valron: *He already intended to go pick up The Arbiter, so.*
Metal Man (GM): You bring the Arbiter. Marley stares.
Marley: "What? You have him on your side now?"
Valron: "Ael too."
The Arbiter: "All is as fortold. This ally is here as suspected."
Marley: "...this is going to be a very strange couple of months."
Valron: "Though I'm not bringing him along for this. Not the best choice for helping form alliances. He's more the 'blast things apart' guy."
Marley: "That stoic guy is going to blast things? ...We'll see, I guess."
Valron: "Anyways, to Angel Island! I meant Ael is the 'blasting things' guy. I figured the Arbiter might be good for diplomatic matters. ...And perhaps punching things, if need be."
Marley: "Ah. My mistake."
Valron: "...In any case, one trip to Angel Island, coming right up."
The Arbiter: "Between the two of us, there is enough diplomacy for this mission and another one at the same time."
Marley: "I guess you could say that twice."
Valron: "Always good to have a second opinion."
Metal Man (GM): And... as much as I hate to pause here, my mind is spent.
Metal Man (GM): Continuatio
The group would arrive at Angel Island.
There, they would see something... strange going on.
The Echidna are outside, on a Mayan-style pyramid.
At its center, is a singular pole.
The pole is glowing fiercely.
Marley: "Wait a minute... is that what I think it is?"
Valron: "...What is it?"
The Arbiter: "Incredible amounts of energy are coming off of that pole."
Marley: "It's... it's one of those poles... the one that Jack stole from them!"
Metal Man (GM): He would flip open the great holy book that GUN stole and show the page to Valron.
Valron blinks, looking at the page.
Marley: "Y'see, Jack used this book to figure out how to use it against them."
Metal Man (GM): The pole is explained to be "The Holiest of Holies, Holy Life Bestower and Destroyer."
Marley: "It was a central symbol to their people. He took it because he wanted them all to die so he could study their ruins."
Metal Man (GM): It is the Deathstaff, the one in the book anyway.
This pole only looks like it.
Valron: "...I was wondering where that went."
Marley: "When they didn't die, he took to trying to finish the job, then got distracted by the Questers."
Valron: "I guess they were useful for something, then."
Marley: "Borne decided to try to kill the Echidna instead, and, failed. ...But why is that here? We should take a closer look." *He'd hurry off ahead.*
Valron: "After killing Jack, I was care- oh. Yes. We should." *He nods, following Marley.*
Metal Man (GM): You'd eventually reach the religious ceremony. The Emperor is bowing before the staff.
Emperor: "O holy staff, we have forsaken you for too long. When the bearer said they had found you, I feared that you were nothing more than an inferior copy. At first, our fears were true. A lesser staff, created from normal rock by that heathen Jack Al'Drath, you were hollow and without meaning."
"But then a miracle occurred and, in our time of need, the energies of our temples restored you."
"The great oracle statues have once again come to our aid, their guidance having been useful in these trying times. What, o holy staff, do you prophecy now?"
Metal Man (GM): The staff glows, then makes a teal arrow pointing at all of you.
He turns around. He and the entire procession gasp almost in unison.
Emperor: "You have brought the holy book to us, in our time of need? You have brought our only human champion, Marley, to us in our time of need? O holy staff, we are forever in your debt."
Marley: "Well. I didn't know y'thought of me that way. I'll take it, though. Here... this book is yours."
Metal Man (GM): A scribe would take it and leaf through it, as if he was touching a part of the Heavens itself.
Scribe: "This is the one that was stolen by GUN. It has... damage... but it is still far more than we have had for nearly twenty years."
Emperor: "...What managed you to get this holy book, o Champion?"
Marley: "Borne... has changed. He has renounced his ways, in favor of a greater enemy. I do not trust him. But in his greed for power, he has somehow loosened his old prejudices. You are to be sovereign without fear of GUN invasion. And with my help, you can once again restore the ancient warp systems and technology that the great Emperor Kragok had."
Metal Man (GM): They gasp again, the Emperor rising.
Emperor: "And... what have your companions to play in this part?"
Marley: "The big metal thing is just an ally of Valron, but Valron is the example of a formerly wicked Demon Quester who has turned to the side of Alsa. He shall advise us on the great Alsan war of defense that is to come."
Metal Man (GM): He would gesture to Valron.
Marley: "Tell them what lies out there, threatening the entire planet of Alsa."
Metal Man (GM): They all look to Valron. Then, a Bioware dialog choice wheel comes up. j/k
Though, seriously, Valron now has the floor.
Indeed. I shall give you a moment to compose a response.
Feel free to ask me for any info you need.
Hooray, cheating with time so that you can come off as composed on a moment's notice.
He's vague on purpose, so you can specifically choose what you feel the greatest threat is out of those, and list others that you feel are important.
Indeed, Borne himself was fairly vague on what exactly the "aliens" were in his own mentioning, so it appears you can basically choose who is the biggest one.
Valron: "On the matter of threats... Of particular concern, I find to be the Dweezil, beings who pilot ships that use reality-warping steam who want to take over this planet. Then, there's also the matter of the immense hole in time that threatens to destroy everything, which is why I was hoping to gather some help on figuring out a way to deal with that as well."
The Arbiter: "The Dweezil were an opposing force to our stabilizing Time Cop force in the past. I know the holes in their defenses. Using your magical knowledge we could work together to destroy the Dweezil."
Emperor: "O ally of the champion, then we shall take these words as our direction, for you have delivered to us the Word which we lacked for so long. We shall craft what energies we can from the holy book so as to disband the unholy energies that run these 'Dweezil' and use the Stargate that providence provided us with to further summon more allies."
Valron: "Yes... more allies would certainly be wonderful."
Emperor: "I shall now retire to advise my subjects, O champions of Alsa. We shall meet again, in a few days, after these directions have been set in. So it shall be remembered."
Metal Man (GM): He would nod, then the others would bow to you and him in procession, then march off to their palace with him.
Marley: "Well... that was some timing."
Valron: "Indeed it was."
The Arbiter: "I get the feeling Borne helped set us up."
Marley: "I'm not so sure... He would have much rather been the one to do that if he knew."
"Whatever that potion did, it made him less paranoid, not more."
"As much as I hate to say it, we ought to do this and avoid dinging Borne as long as he's acting this strangely benevolent."
"Ready in case he doesn't, though."
The Arbiter: "Seems reasonable. What of this Stargate?"
Marley: "Oh. Well, that's the one in the cave. The Questers left it behind."
The Arbiter: "Shouldn't we look at it?"
Valron: "They tend to do that to a lot of stuff."
Marley: "...Probably..."
Valron: "May as well check it out, yeah."
Marley: "We'll want to secure it in the name of the UAF before anything freakish comes out of it."
Metal Man (GM): He'd start walking towards it.
Valron: "Makes sense. Afterwards we should get to forming an alliance with the Mushroom Republic. In any case..." *He'd follow Marley.*
Metal Man (GM): Quick brb on my end.
Back.
You'd walk up to it. You'd see Tails there, just sort of sitting around, reading a book. Next to him is a copy of the Arbiter's device... and the Stargate.
Tails: "Here to ask me some questions again, Echidna--" *He'd drop his book.* "Whoa! What's... what's he doing here?"
The Arbiter: "..."
Valron: "He's with me."
Tails: "But... but... he's evil! All the Time Cops are! We had a heck of a time just holding onto this device in case they came back again. Stay back!" *He would press a button and be surrounded by a Time Cop force field.*
Metal Man (GM): The Arbiter would curiously poke it.
The Arbiter: "Yes. He has successfully copied my technology. Unusual."
Valron: "...Well he's a technical genius. Not really surprising."
Tails: "I read everything in the database. I know the entire Time Cop history. And I even know some of your predictions... I didn't expect you to show up here, but..." *He would point.* "Your plans are flawed, and if Sonic was here, I'd be the first to make you change them... ...but he isn't, so I'm just going to have to ensure you don't interfere."
Marley: "Tails, I--"
Tails: "You sat in a bar drinking rum! What do you think that's going to do? Nothing!"
The Arbiter: "It is clear. Past Quester and Time Cop follies have poisoned his logic."
Valron: "Not surprising. The Questers were idiots and past Time Cop shenanigans... Well..."
Tails: "You call 'being shot at by killer robots' and 'abandoned during Borne attacks' mere follies? If I wasn't able to just revive myself I'd be dead!' I saw that scene with the Echidna--it's all nice, but you don't have a shiny book for me. Whatever Borne is planning, it isn't going to trick me either."
Marley: "Well, it is true. I couldn't trick you if I wanted, Tails. I wasn't the 'brainy' Mad Man."
Valron: "And I am so far from clever it's not even funny."
Marley: "Borne could, but that would lead me to wonder why he would leave you out, unless he wanted this very reaction..."
The Arbiter: "I am infinitely more intelligent than you. However, deception is meaningless to me."
Tails: "You're telling me that Borne wants me to get mad? No, that's just a trick too." *He would then sit there.* "Here, I can prove whether or not you're telling the truth. My friends went into that Stargate about a month ago and never came back."
"You go and get them back, and I'll talk."
"Otherwise? You can't touch me. Not even that Arbiter can. I improved this version of his device."
"I'm ready. When Borne comes, I'll use this device to erase his ships from history, then backchannel plane the disruption to destroy his cities in a way that removes his military from existence. You can tell him that--it won't go away. It'll just be there, to protect him from hurting any more innocent mobians."
The Arbiter: "Then you set the Stargate to warp us into a black hole, removing us from the equation."
Tails: "Hey! I'm not evil! You could read it anyway. You have all the locations in the universe of interest on your copy of this device anyway."
The Arbiter: "...This is when being infinitely intelligent is a liability."
Tails: "You can't feign ignorance with me. I have a whole copy of your mind. I've spent all these years reading it, planning for when the Questers came back, and the Time Cops came back."
"I'm ready for whatever insane, innocent-harming plans you have."
Valron: "...So, any idea what's on the other side? Because I honestly don't mind doing the whole 'search and rescue' thing if that's what it'll take to open up a more peaceful line of conversation."
Tails: "Well if you're that dedicated to trying to fool me, then, yes. I have the information. P-5-204-8, Arbiter."
The Arbiter: "...It's a universe in Sloan's hold. They went there... ...why?"
Valron: "...Well this is going to be completely awful already."
Tails: "There's an artifact that destroys nanite beings for good. We were going to get it and destroy all the Mad Men."
"They're just as bad as Questers."
Marley pulls his collar.
Tails: "You're not even human! You're another robot. Which reminds me, Robotnik needs to go down next. All of his clones too. But first things first. You open that Stargate and rescue my buddies from... from Sloan, apparently." *Scratches his head* "...Sonic really should have told me that was there, I'd have made him a device to deactivate Sloan's tricks..."
"Since unlike you, I only have this older copy of your mind, which listed it as neutral territory."
Valron: "Egh. It had to be Sloan's area."
The Arbiter: "That is why you don't use wisdom that isn't your own, fox."
Tails: "...Fine, you win that one. Just... hurry up and save my friends. I'm really worried..."
Valron: "Well, like I said. If it'll open up a more peaceful line of conversation..." *He then glances over to Marley and The Arbiter* "Any last thoughts before we do this?"
Marley: "It's Sloan territory. We had better be ready for anything."
The Arbiter: "I advise caution. I will tell you when it is best for us to flee. If I used my full power, Sloan would be dead, but that would destroy this timeli--"
Tails: "That's because your mind shows here that you plan to use him to help create the original Time Cops!"
The Arbiter: "..."
Metal Man (GM): He hangs his head.
The Arbiter: "You should really stop reading my mind."
Tails: "What's the matter? No longer able to keep your pawns in the dark?"
The Arbiter: "No, just--"
Tails: "You set Ael up! It's all in here."
The Arbiter: "I can prove that I didn't, but--"
Tails: "You won't, because if there even is data, it's even more classified. I made not one but two of these copies, Borne ended up with one he stole. You're about as unique as any one Echidna on this island is. You and Robotnik could probably have an infinite number of clones now."
The Arbiter: "...I told Autumnus we should have copyright protection, but..." *Silently pauses* "It doesn't matter. Only the living copy in me is updated."
Tails: "Hope you're quick at updating. If Borne ever cracks your encryption, he will be the next Time Cop leader, not you."
The Arbiter: "Some things are not as they appear, trust me. You only have the literal interpretation..." *He would stand there.* "But there is an inflection you mortals would never understand."
Tails: "Well, good luck with that, I don't want a Borne Time Cop either."
Marley: "Shall we leave, or get popcorn while the Arbiter and Tails insult one another some more?"
Valron: "Honestly, I'd rather have a couple boxes of those little gumdrop things, myself. Regardless... I do believe we should stop messing around and actually get things done."
Tails: "And another thing, I don't get why you made it so that Sonic and my friends other than me never got to do anything much about the Que--"
The Arbiter: "Initiating Stargate."
Metal Man (GM): Tails is cut off by the Stargate nearly instantaneously opening, and the Arbiter stepping inside.
Marley: "Oooo, you made him mad. Good one, I was wondering if that machine had any emotion in him."
Metal Man (GM): Marley would wander into the gate.
Tails would then stare at you alone.
Tails: "Ah. They're gone now. You should seriously consider not following them. They have insane plans for this world. They're just going to be like replacement Questers."
"They can save my friends, but you..." *He would turn on the Arbiter's device.* "I have seen the future. You won't like it."
"Your only chance of escaping without a severe risk of dying is now or shortly after... by fleeing this entire dimension."
"Figured you ought to know, because I and my friends don't have that choice."
Valron: "...I could run away, yes."
Tails: "This IS Alsa. You don't have to help us."
Valron: "...But I want to."
Tails: *Shrugs* "Your life. I figured I should tell you, since I felt... you might be the only ex-Quester who was just accidentally dragged into this."
Valron: "Noted. And I thank you for that. But... The way I see it, it always gets worse before it gets better. And I'm going to try and ride it out."
Tails: "You're welcome." *He would sigh, his ears folding.* "I wish you luck in finding Sonic..."
Dragoshi: *Certainly got into another whirlwind session of sorts, that's for sure.*
Metal Man (GM): And so, on that note, we pause Dragoshi.
Yes. I basically improv'd the entire thing... again... ...and yet it was like I'd already written it all down.
My brain is crazy nuts.
Editor's Note: Nah. A separate plural facet wrote this down while I was either sleeping or busy. Nothing nuts about it, past me.
Metal Man (GM): Anyway, ready to continue your end, Razor.
Continuation
Razor and Xavier are at HQ. Once the warp closes, Xavier puts a hand to his chin.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "So... now to figure out how to circumvent that whole 'stay off of Alsa' thing, because my car is still on Alsa, and I don't want to receive it after Garrick has probably discovered all my secret things I left inside it. After that... ...hmmmm..."
"I should plot how not to get Garrick killed. It will be refreshingly different from my many plots to kill him previously."
"Do you know who Garrick's most hated enemies are, Razor?"
Razor frowns slightly, cracking his neck a bit as he glances around. "It's hard to say. It's a pretty sure bet that just about everybody either hates him, doesn't trust him, or thinks he's a hindrance in their plans..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I was going to say it sounds like me, but now it seems no one wants me dead other than my half-wit wannabe. A very strange feeling."
"I think I have a plan anyway. KitOrbel was clearly up to something, having a moon base there and everything."
"She has a Mewtwo too."
"Hmmmmm... yes..." *He stares.* "...Hmmm... might be difficult to get Razor to wear a dress..."
"Must be something else Razor can hide as..."
Razor: "...yeah. Why was she keeping that a secret again? I mean... isn't Mewtwo a clone? It'd make sense there was more than one..." *He then just sort of stares at Xavier.* "...do I even want to know what you're thinking?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, I was going to suggest you disguise yourself as KitOrbel and I morph into Mewtwo, so that then Garrick gets mad at KitOrbel. Then while they both fight, we drive off in my limo in style. But surely there's someone else who looks more like you that you could be. I'm pretty sure that KitOrbel is hiding something, so we just will pretend to be deaf and dumb and let her do what she wants. While actually doing super cool plans that will expose it and get my car back."
"They think us old Questers are idiots, those Alsa Questers."
"I never did let them know that half of my insanity was a ruse."
Metal Man (GM): He would glance around and then, seeing that no one is watching, push some buttons on his dex.
Smash Dex: "Streaming 'Yellow Submarine' to all the unauthorized people logged into your database is continuing, Metal."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Excellent."
Razor chuckles and folds his arms across his chest. "...and the other half, the influence of homicidal fools?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Let them think all I am doing is smashing teacups with my golf club. Well, yes. They just drove me insane."
"Those Questers in the era 'Season 10' as I call it... I was hoping Genetia would kill them all."
"Master Hand warned me not to send them there, as it would kill them all."
"I made sure to send them there with no leadership, then hoped Glyph would kill them all. He told me he was evil and had powers. I was mad that he failed. I made sure to slip Dr. Archellago a million coins to kill him."
"Heh heh heh..."
"...Anyway, the fools are gone, so we can actually do smart things."
"You see anything we should do?"
"Since I want my car back, but that's not going to fix the giant hole in the universe."
"I have no clue where that even came from... Ivan won't tell me."
Razor: "Right... so... personally? I don't think we need to resort to any trickery. Let Garrick send you back the car. He's already suspicious of your motives... anything strange happens, and he'll be on you anyways. As for that hole..." *He starts to pace, pondering as he gently strokes the stubble grown on his chin.* "I don't really think it's in our means, alone, to fix."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I've never actually fixed a hole in the universe. Only flown through it with reckless abandon. Maybe we could do that and find out the other side."
"I know it's not a black hole... ...but we need my car... ...no, wait. Yes. We fly the Valhalla into it."
"...Hahahaha."
"We can plug the hole with the Valhalla!"
"It has infinite cheap shields. Charles ripped a hole in reality to invent them."
"...No, not the hole that's there, that'd be too simple."
Razor: "...I was going to say..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Anyway, we can just park that in there, blocking the hole. While we try to figure out what to do about it. If a bunch of evil plans to come in, or it tries to take apart the universe... too bad. Giant space ship in the way."
"With invincible godmode fields."
"I wished I coulda gotten my chance to ram that moon with it..."
"Just imagine... Garrick threatens me with death... then the moon explodes and a gigantic sun-blocking spacecraft causes all of Alsa to be without sunlight."
"...I guess that will have to be filed away. Instead, there's uhhh... Dweezil things!"
"Weird... dudes in steampunk space ships..."
"We can go kill them. They called me names, and told me they were coming to invade Nintendus."
"Maybe drive the ships through them on the way to plug the hole and use their destroyed ships to further plug the hole."
"You can kill their leader. He's too fast for me."
Razor: "Mets... buddy, pal... focus. Just up and plugging a hole in reality can't possibly be as simple as shoving a large enough object into it, and going and picking fights is unlikely to solve the problem either."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I forget I don't have a team of WMDs to make all my problems go bye-bye. Oops." *He thinks.* "How am I to do it with just the two of us..."
Razor: "Well, the easy solution is to get a NEW team of WMDs. Ones with brains. Even if they don't realize they're on your team... Allies of circumstance and convenience can be the most powerful teams of all."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "You know, we used to have allies, before we discovered that Questers were so powerful that being sane and having allies was old hat." *He would think.* "...The factions of Nintendus won't leave though, and Ivan seems convinced we never need to leave this planet... and I don't have any footholds on Alsa, and Garrick is refusing to let me even visit there as a peaceful guest. Hmmmm..."
"This is why I figured we ought to go incognito, to find allies..."
Razor: "One... we need to deal with Ivan at some point. This is not a man who maneuvers peacefully... he has some sort of plot in mind, though I'm not sure what. The factions of Nintendus... they simply need to be presented with the reality of what threatens them in order to unite. As for Alsa... well, as I said, allies of convenience. We simply need a common enemy to point them towards, then help."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, I'd note the Dweezil, but they only threatened me, not so much attacked... yet. I suspect them mightily though."
"I'd say we should settle Ivan first. He's holding too many cards."
"You have the fields to Evil Wolfman and The Void, right? We should move them out of his base in case he's lying and has one of his own fields."
Razor: "...I guarantee you that, while a plan involving crossdressing is likely better than going and randomly attacking the Dweezil, it's still a very bad plan. I agree with Ivan... he's also close. The Dweezil we can provoke... him we can't."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "That reminds me, I need to get one of my own Digi-things so I can challenge Garrick to a battle. I wish I knew where the Digi-things lived."
Smash Dex: "You don't bother to ask me, naturally."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I didn't ask for your comment, Dexy!"
Smash Dex: "I am only a digital artifact with pieces of SIMBER's AI code. I wouldn't know anything about the creatures that live inside the internet all over the place."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. Now..." *Puts dex in his suit pocket* "Let's go see what Ivan is doing."
Metal Man (GM): He'd point to a place not far away.
Just down a dirt path.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I'd drive, but... the whole car thing..."
Metal Man (GM): He'd start walking.
Razor: "Driving's overrated anyways..." *He folds his hands behind his head and starts following behind him.*
Metal Man (GM): Inside Ivan's lab
Before Xavier and Razor arrive... Ivan is there, staring at the transformers.
Ivan Robotnik: "...You would use me... both of you... one in the future, one in the past... Now the tables have turned!"
The Void: "Bah! You know nothing! Those people will use YOU!"
Ivan Robotnik: "No, I have control now. Your powers are mine to use. The hole in the universe... I will use your powers to mend it!"
The Void: "What kind of insanity is that?"
Ivan Robotnik: "You possess the power to warp reality. So... I will just force you to warp it to NOT fall apart."
The Void: "But you--"
Metal Man (GM): The door opens, Xavier and Razor entering.
The Void: "Aha! They have you now, Ivan! Catching you talking to me!"
Ivan Robotnik: "He's been saying that every time someone else comes in."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I didn't hear anything."
Metal Man (GM): Razor: Neither did you, actually.
Ivan was talking to... nothing.
Ivan Robotnik: "...My mistake. I forget sometimes."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Forget what? To shave that hideous thing you call a goatee?"
Razor: "...so... you forget that you talk to yourself?"
Ivan Robotnik: "...Yes. Yes. Anyway, how are... things?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, outside of the creepy doctor who forgets he talks to himself, the invisible car lost on the planet run by the madman which the former Quester that is a Snake clone won't let me visit and the little girl who has tea time with a horrifying genetic superweapon... Uhhhh... Strangely not mint-flavored."
Razor: "...that is... I can't really argue against that statement."
Ivan Robotnik: "..." *He shakes his head.* "I'm guessing there is a reason to come here, other than making me question all of our sanity."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. The devices. They're not safe here. We need to bury them in the safe vault at Quester HQ."
Ivan Robotnik: "But... I..."
Metal Man (GM): He pauses...
Ivan Robotnik: "...Yes. They must be secured." *He speaks strangely monotone.*
"How may I help you secure them."
Xavier Ridgecrest waves his hand in front of Ivan's face.
Ivan Robotnik: "Please do not do that."
Razor: "...he's not a robot clone, is he?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Do you usually turn into a robot clone at noon, Ivan?"
Ivan Robotnik: "Yes. I mean--" *He twitches.* "Oh. That's just my trance. Nothing to worry about, to be honest!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Now I don't know if I want to move them, because that was really odd."
Ivan Robotnik: "Er... go ahead and move them!"
Razor: "...maybe we should try moving Ivan instead?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "That sounds good."
Ivan Robotnik: "That sounds..."
Metal Man (GM): He twitches.
Ivan Robotnik: "You... do not understand... I am perfectly comfortable here..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "All right. Then maybe we move the devices away from you, while you stand right here."
Ivan Robotnik: "... ..."
Metal Man (GM): He passes out.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "All right then! That's perfectly normal!"
Razor: "What in the nine just happened here?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I have no clue!"
Metal Man (GM): He points the dex at Ivan.
Smash Dex: "Ivan Robotnik. 360 lbs. Likes to play checkers while wearing a blindfold."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "That doesn't tell me anything!"
Razor: "Other than the fact that he really needs to work out."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, let's give him a workout. Help me lift him. We can take him to the sick bay, then deal with these demon transformers."
Metal Man (GM): He would go to pick up one end of Ivan.
Razor: "...you know... in the same stroke, I'm somehow rather wary of leaving these things unattended... fielded or not. This'd be much easier if there was a third of us." *He looks towards Ivan, then shrugs.* "Still probably better to get him out of here." *Then he goes to help.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Hmmmm... My dex will watch them."
Metal Man (GM): He sets his dex so it can videotape the remotes.
Er, transformers...
Xavier Ridgecrest: "All right. Time to lift a big guy."
Metal Man (GM): Between Razor and Xavier, there is plenty to lift him.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I only am doing this because I don't want to drag him and get dirt on his overly elaborate robes."
Razor fiddles with his own dex so that it's watching the view from Xavier's dex.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Good idea."
Razor: "I couldn't give two shits about his fancy robes, but it's probably not healthy to drag him around." *He doesn't seem to have a ton of issues carrying his own part of the weight.*
Metal Man (GM): You'd get him back. Eventually Xavier would set him down in a hospital bed and call over the staff.
Why... there's Nurse Joy!
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...I got tired of Dr. Mario stealing my wallet."
Nurse Joy: "Oh dear! What happened to this person?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Evil transformers were too much for him to contemplate. He probably ate too many candy bars too."
Razor: "...yeah. Dr. Mario was a douchebag." *He looks to Joy and smirks.* "...and this one's easier on the eyes. It's a win-win." *He then glances towards Xavier.* "Yeah, he just sort of... collapsed."
Nurse Joy: "Well, I'll have the Chansey heal him and he should be up in a few hours... after he rests, because..." *She stares at him.* "He looks like he's been awake for weeks!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Weeks?"
Nurse Joy: "Look at him!" *She points to the massive bags under his eyes, his unnaturally pale skin... cracks in his flesh...*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...The weird lighting in there and my visor being fogged up didn't help me notice."
Nurse Joy: "I'll see what I can do..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Now I REALLY want to know what was happening in there... Guess we better see." *He'd start wandering off.*
Nurse Joy: "Come back soon! Your giant scientist should be just fine then! Er... sorry... I'm used to referring to pokemon based on what they look like..."
Razor looks at his own dex, making sure to keep close to Xavier for now. "Just keep a close eye on him... and it's fine. He is quite large."
Metal Man (GM): You'd see the vision is fine in there. What's not so fine is when you return, and hear a strange humming in the room.
Then a man appears out of thin air, from in front of the Transformers.
He's very static-y, but 'real' as it were, a hologram.
Razor instantly steps back onto the defensive...
Sardis Mongul?: "You... have come back! You... think you can... contain..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Holy Bejeezus! It's Sardis Monty Haul! The Amazing fake Solarian!"
Razor: "...who?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "The Void's liar-projection."
Metal Man (GM): He waves his hand through him.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "The Void's trying to trick us."
Metal Man (GM): He morphs again, into The Void's hologram instead.
The Void: "Damn you, I had a great performance in mind, now I'm stuck here talking to you like a mere mortal. Sealed in this stupid container, even my weakest minded servant is able to resist me enough to get away..."
"You do not know what things I could do if you only opened this field!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Actually, I have a copy of your best hits. They were not good."
Razor: "...I think I have a pretty good idea."
The Void: "Damn you! Stupid time travelers! Fine. I just wanted to offer a deal."
"I tried to use Ivan, but his body was too strong! You... you ruined him!"
"He believes he has a purpose now! Not even my wannabe fake can control him!"
Evil Wolfman: "Speak for yourself, sentient plot hole."
Metal Man (GM): Evil Wolfman is only a voice, however also unknown to Razor.
A much more ominous one than The Void, too.
The Void: "You have vast enemies... outside of this planet. I could leave this planet for good... and focus on killing all of them!"
"The people of Alsa have offended me with their rebuffing of my offer. I could consume them all in endless death and chaos!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "You're a bit late for that, they gave me a better offer."
The Void: "...Buh... what is it that I have to do to get your trust? You people annoy me!"
Razor actually laughs at that. "...gain? Yeah. That's not gonna happen."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Stay in there, don't mess with Ivan, and then spend 5 years reflecting on how you failed to be a good team worker back in the old days. Then I will send you far away, never to be seen again."
"You know. That whole X-Zone thing? I believe there's one where you put all the indestructible demons too."
"They call it hell, or something. I don't know."
The Void: "Not those people! They are the inbred hicks of the deity-world!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "You burned your bridges. We're not negotiating anything."
The Void: "Says you! I have a backup plan! You must let me free, or... Evil Wulfhead will send in the Autumnus?"
Evil Wolfman: "I'm not sure. I could wait a millennia and then do it anyway. Or they could send me to 'hell', and I could take it over. Unlike you, time is nothing. These people are nothing. You are all nothing."
"You will die of old age and be destroyed, and everyone will forget. Then the cycle will begin anew."
"And then I shall have my vengeance!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I'm getting annoyed at these twin scene-chewers. Do you know a place to put them, Razor? You... came from a dimension-ally place right? Maybe they had a garbage bin somewhere."
Razor: "...we could throw them into the reality-hole. That might do something. ...or maybe feed them to Ivan. I'm pretty sure that man's gullet is an interdimensional garbage dump..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Hm... yes. Into the reality hole."
The Void: "What? What is this hole in reality?"
Evil Wolfman: "Oh, nothing. We'll just be trapped in there for all eternity, Void."
The Void: "Noooooooooo!!!!!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Sounds good to me. Let's chuck them into there."
Metal Man (GM): He then goes to pick the thing up... and then realizes it's sorta... stuck behind that field.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Gonna need to somehow move this onto the Wing Fortress..."
Razor chuckles and waggles the controller. "...I'm still not entirely sure it's the best idea... but it's funny to think of. We need to know more about that hole before we actually throw anything into it. Have you tried a probe?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Probes... probes..."
Metal Man (GM): He thinks.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I can wire one together and send it there. Normally Garrick or... yes. Dr. Light will make one. I'll have him send a probe into there."
"Anything else, or shall we retire to wait for results on our probe?"
"The twin Talking heads don't have much enlightening to say, I don't think."
The Void: "You will regret this! You can't defund Road Services!"
Evil Wolfman: "Go ahead, throw me anywhere. It won't change anything."
Razor: "That's thinkin'." *He smirks and puts away the forcefield controller.* "I have to say... this whole mess could very well come out with the optimal solution after all." *He nods and starts back out.* "...sorry about nabbing the REDITS, by the way... I was hoping to find Garrick before you tried to kill him."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Meh. It worked, and that was the first real use of the REDITS in forever. I'm thinking we might even make it work properly in case we need it again. It was Yurie who said it wasn't good enough."
"...I wish we knew where the heck she went."
The Void: "Hah! Not even I know!" *His last input as the lab fades out of view for the time being.*
Razor sighs lightly and glances up. "It's probably for the best. She was smart but... incredibly impulsive. And angry."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Reminds me of Panzer. I'm glad my spine was made of steel."
Razor: "...wasn't Panzer also a homicidal maniac?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. I checked, though. Somehow she erased herself from ever existing."
"We're safe... thankfully."
"... ...But, depressingly, all too similar to how Yurie just vanished."
"Weird."
Razor: "Maybe history abhors female Questers..."
Editor's Note: Nope! Panzer and Yurie just were exceptions. The future sees that pattern overturned entirely.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...And then there is KitOrbel, who... yeah... ...Sally wanted a dragon, and did little else."
"We actually had a dragon named Blade. Who shape shifted..."
Metal Man (GM): He then stares at himself.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "And now I can shapeshift. What the... how odd. If only Sally stayed around."
"But she too vanished."
"KitOrbel is here, but also a danger to us all."
"...Then there was Alys, who died after a foolish mission."
"Let me think... and there was Val, who advocated treating an evil scientist as the good guy."
"Mewtwo threw her out a window after she called the Questers 'Stupid' 245 billion times."
"She wasn't entirely wrong either--she just advocated equally stupid solutions."
"Oh! But I did find someone while I was out on my travels. She... has no clue who she is, and seems to have awakened from a 200 year trance."
"...Still sounds more promising than most of the Questers of the past though."
"Hm. Oh. There was one person with a paintbrush. They were harmless, but I only know of them from my logs. Too bad."
Razor: "...you found someone? Huh." *Yeah, that was what he got from that.* "...so... sounds like my point was pretty valid then."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yeah. Deadly so."
"Oh... well, there was one."
"Natalie and Rena... or something."
"...They didn't do much either, I hear they also vanished."
"...Yeah."
"I should totally get my own Renamon, though. That violently cursing one Natalie had sounds like a good way to confuse and frighten my enemies."
Editor's Note: Really, just more of a sign of SSQ's narrative problems that would later be fixed, than a hard and fast 'rule' or 'curse.' On the other hand, most of the drummers of Side Quest definitely actually vanished (even if it wasn't forever.)
Metal Man (GM): He'd continue walking as you enter R&R.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Then eventually I retire to a peaceful voyage across the universe. Well. Maybe not all peaceful, but Questering... eh. I'll have done my dues."
Razor: "I'd just like to go home at some point... but eh. Way I figure it, I'm needed more here than there. I already did my time paradox world-saving there..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Heh. Well, just one more tour of duty ought to do it."
Metal Man (GM): He'd sit on a couch and idly take out a canteen full of radioactive soda, drinking some.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I'll be sure to take one of these couches with me though. Much better than my ship's stiff chairs."
Razor: "They ARE nice couches..." *He sits down on another, wings tucked tightly behind him as he pulls out a roll of mints, popping one into his mouth.* "...it may not be the most exciting way of doing things, but waiting and learning is a refreshing change of pace..."
Metal Man (GM): Pause