Date: 5:55:26 PM, February 22nd to 8:28:52 PM, February 22nd, 2013.
Editor's Note: This would be the first log where Xavier's group as I remember them for CONFRONTATION had fully assembled. And also important canon is also explained.
Metal Man (GM): Last time on SSQ...
Recap
- Xavier and Razor discussed the hole in reality. After many different guesses, they decided to just send a probe into it.
- Nintendus Mewtwo and KitOrbel had Pad Thai.
- Xavier hired a strange witch-person who was very hungry and accepted food as payment.
- Ederick still doesn't know how to take current events.
- Young Aribar has probably been building a massive jenga tower somewhere due to unuse.
- Demon is probably assisting with that, having also not had much to do.
- Somewhere far away, in a slightly different time-scape, Xavier and Garrick were spotted trying to kill someone who resembles Digi but who didn't seem to have memories matching up to SSQ Digi's memories.
We continue, as Xavier is in the Big Room... and absolutely anyone from that list, including Florina if her player is up for it, are/can be in the Big Room as Xavier goes over what the probe found in the huge hole in reality.
Razor would definitely be there, enjoying a light snack of some kind of beef sandwich.
Xavier Ridgecrest: *Is busy tapping a projector on the ceiling with a wrench*
"I hate it when these things get worn out."
Razor: "...have you tried duct tape?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Oh... no." *He would get off the table, his weight shaking the whole place.* "Why didn't I think of that..."
KitOrbel: "So, it turns out your Mewtwo likes spicy things and hates dry things. He's pretty Adamant 'bout things. I wonder if he can learn Zen Headbutt- that'd be perfect for him... My Mewtwo is like- the exact opposite, maybe that's why he likes my scones so much... They're pretty dry without glaze..."
Metal Man (GM): He would then take out a box that is incredibly old and rusty.
Florina was lazily floating on her wand nearby, sipping on a juicebox she conjured earlier and not really being social. As expected by a hermit like her, I guess.
Metal Man (GM): He'd take out the duct tape, and blow the dust off of it.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "We used to use this all the time..."
Metal Man (GM): He'd tape the thing, and it would glow oddly, then begin working again.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Of course this isn't normal duct tape... ...In fact I could probably apply it to my face and remove my scars... ...that'd just be freakish though."
KitOrbel: "... That's... That's a thing. Wow."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...It's really old duct tape from when we were Gods... ...I need to tell Ivan to make more of it, when he stops being in a coma."
"We could really use some."
"Now... I see we have everyone here except a few... I can go find them later."
*Clears throat* "This projection is of the hole in reality."
Metal Man (GM): He would point to an image of a giant blue ring that has a giant swirling vortex inside it.
The images slowly become increasingly... oversaturated as the probe nears the hole in reality.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Sensor readouts began to malfunction in ways that make so little sense, Dr. Light began to laugh hysterically. He said 'LOLOLOLOOMG' should not be possible on an integer value. Whatever the hell that means."
"The probe entered the hole... we confirmed that wherever it went, it was torn to pieces by pure chaos."
"I will cautiously suggest this hole leads to another dimension, one even more chaotic than our own."
"Such that simple boundaries of matter don't exist there and if any of us went there we'd be torn to bits."
"...The problem is that the plan to send Evil Wolfman and The Void there would actually be incredibly bad, because... they aren't really made of matter."
"I... get the feeling they came from there."
"It's not the X-Zone. You can't live in it. Not even Dans can live in that."
Razor: "Hm... that's... strange."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "The hole seems to correspond to..." *He shakes his head.* "The time manipulation I did to set us right here. Tests we did outside the hole showed it grew in power every time I used my time device. The hole appears to be a medium through which my Time Powers enter this realm. And all the other Time Cops, in fact."
"Since... as you may have guessed, I never belonged here, I was an intruder like Kuja was."
"What we do about this... is up in the air. It could be used as a weapon. We could try to stuff the unfitting things into the hole and seal it up... or anything else in between."
"I'm not really sure what to make of it."
KitOrbel: "In other words, it's a dimension completely based on the theoretical concept of pure chaos, causing it to vary so wildly that nothing can actually exist there as it's in too much flux to be able to sustain anything and it's the reason you're... You."
Florina took a look and blinked without commenting. She had another sip and continued to listen without speaking up. After adjusting her hat and tossing the juicebox into the trash, she'd conjure another one and nosily pierce it with a straw.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. All the interlopers who came to this realm actually came through there, well, the really early ones. We tore a bigger hole that you guys came through. The other hole is a bit more manageable, being through conventional space."
"...Whereas the chaotic space scrambled everything that came through it, like my devices, my mind, Kuja..."
"It's very possible my insanity and the insanity that keeps coming back came from there."
"It's not going to go away until I resolve the issues with the time device and this realm, either by leaving it, turning it off, or reprogramming it."
"...It explains too, why I can't warp like a Time Cop."
"They have official pathways that they locked off."
"...And since they all left, that means I can't hack into them either."
KitOrbel: "Time Cop warps leave me able to taste purple for twenty minutes..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Now, the way this relates to Illian is that he didn't use that pathway, so it's entirely possible his sanity is only because he took the conventional route after I and the other early people ripped that hole in the world. ...So if I wanted to utterly ruin him I would rip the hole open right over his entire operation."
"It could possibly annihilate all of Alsa too."
"...But also risk destroying the entire reality and consuming it."
Razor: "That was a bad idea before you even added the 'but also.'"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I would need a focus to use it as a weapon of mass destruction."
KitOrbel: "... That sounds like a consequence we want to avoid..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I would prefer the other option myself. We defeat Illian. I take his non-insane Time Device."
"He's stopped. I don't ruin reality anymore and I'm no longer going insane from my device."
"We can take Borne's reality warping device and seal the hole."
"Although Dr. Light also told me he detected something to do with a guy named Sloan near the hole." *Shrugs* "I don't get what that has to do with anything."
"I'll have to ask Red Text what that means."
"Dr. Light himself said someone else had access to it and was clearly using it for something."
Florina had a look on her face which announced that she had absolutely no idea what was even being discussed, but still didn't speak up.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "In a controlled manner, too, not like me. It corrodes me as much as it enhances me. Whoever is using it named Sloan seems to be pipelining it into some other nearby world."
"Attempts to probe it were a failure, though. We found nothing there. The probe bounced off of an invisible wall which we can't seem to understand."
"We could always investigate that, because... invisible walls are fun."
"I dunno. What do you guys think?"
"Oh, and don't hesitate to ask me questions. Even I don't really know what's going on."
"This is all very weird."
Florina finally spoke up. "So. What are we destroying, and when?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, Illian, eventually. Borne, probably too, eventually. Also this invisible wall, probably eventually... we just pick which first."
Razor sighs and rubs at the side of his head. "Lovely."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "If they're all as similar I think, it involves shooting techno people. With explosions. I got a new fancy gun for killing with. I can help you if you need one. I remembered back when I was sane... I used to make things."
"Oh... and my car! My car is still on Alsa!"
KitOrbel: "Still working on that."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "That goody-two-shoes Garrick doesn't want me on Alsa. I can just transform into Solid Snake if I have to."
Florina took a big sip and processed what she was told. "Er. Right. Them and those things. Very well, young man, that sounds like something I can do... just point me in the right direction."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Right, I'll let my brain trust discover which is not the stupid decision first. I can do the leading thing, but the big logic things hurt my head."
"I was made for deciding how to kill things, not choosing which ones to kill."
"In the Erastian Army they would tell me this big guy was the enemy, and I would help direct the other people to destroy them. Then end up doing it myself, because I could warp time and launch clones of myself everywhere."
"I'd do it now but, well. Every use of my device destroys reality. Not gonna do that."
Razor: "I don't think having anything to do with Alsa right now is a good idea. We want to keep on Garrick's good side."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Right. That means we can go kick the invisible wall. Somehow." *He frowns.* "How am I to break that wall... do I call it Mr. Gorbachev? Hmmmmm... yesss..." *He gets an idea.*
"The energy goes in that wall... my device has been hacked to use that energy..."
"...So I can warp us inside by riding on that energy..."
"...You guys don't mind being temporarily driven insane, right?"
KitOrbel: "I mind a little."
Razor: "...just a little."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Damn. Wait a minute. I could go in first and try to open the wall by myself."
Florina "Insanity should be... er, acquired from years of study, not handed out like snacks."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yeah! ...I thought I was the only one who liked it. Anyway."
"I can go in and open the wall. Then everyone else comes in... .and... hmmm."
"...What's on the other side though..."
"...And should we kill everything in there... or not..."
"..." *Contemplates while idly loading several types of guns and sticking them into his armor*
"Oh... .that's right..."
"If The Void and Evil Wolfman are to blame, they can tell us!"
Metal Man (GM): He turns on a comms.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Annoying idiot twins! What is in your home dimension of chaos???"
The Void: "What?"
Evil Wolfman: "Nothing."
The Void: "WHAT???"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "But it ate our probe!"
Razor: "...you really think they're gonna tell you anything?"
Evil Wolfman: "Oh, there is a way I would tell you. For a price."
The Void: "Whaaaaaaat???"
Xavier Ridgecrest disconnects The Void.
Evil Wolfman: "But you're not going to trust me. I wouldn't, anyway."
Florina went back to quietly drinking her juice, still clearly not knowing what she signed up for, but not letting the others know about it. .oO(Just nod and go with the flow, these people are your only ticket to finding out what to do in this crazy universe.) These thoughts allowed her to zone out while this conversation was going on.
Evil Wolfman: "Asking you what your homeworld is while you had reason to kill me would be stupid, after all. You'd tell me it was full of candy and gold, and everyone left their doors unlocked. I would enter and then die horribly as your neighbors or enemies lay in wait for me."
"If you're smart enough to understand what this implies for my own realm... then you'd know better than to even bother."
Metal Man (GM): *Connection closes.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Hmmmm..."
KitOrbel: "Is this the same one I effectively shot in the back?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. I can only assume he wants you as dead as he wants everyone else dead."
"He was found laying around in a transformer somehow in some confusing mess I forget."
KitOrbel: "Hi stepfather!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "He can't hear you, he was rude and hung up on us. Which is disturbing because I swear he can't do anything inside that transformer. I still want to release him and just kill him."
KitOrbel: "Call him back, I wanna see if I can annoy him into telling me proper."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "He claims to be the master of Smash Energy. Hah. Hahahaha. HAHAHAHAHA. Okay."
Evil Wolfman: "What? Did my implied warning not scare you away?"
KitOrbel: "Hello stepfather~."
Evil Wolfman: "Ah, you. Someone almost as good at me as deception." *despite the only image being a Transformer, a ghostly ethereal grin would appear on the image in distorted pixels.*
"Come to try to fool me again? Go ahead."
Metal Man (GM): Demon would walk into this scene without any clue what was going on.
King Demon: *Yeah, definitely has no idea what's going on* "Ok... how long was I away, and who the hell are all of you?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Hi Demon. We're talking to the insane evil doppelganger of Wolfman about a realm full of chaos that kills probes and how to get into an invisible walled off realm that uses its power."
King Demon: "Oh... him again?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. He's not actually the one we really care about, but he's imprisoned and might know information about it."
Florina looked at the new arrival and nodded quietly before going back to her juice.
Evil Wolfman: "Yes, it's me. Yes, I don't like being here either."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Also, Razor is here, Demon."
King Demon: "Join the club... I don't think anyone actually likes being here... but here we are all the same."
Metal Man (GM): He gestures to Razor.
King Demon nods to Razor and Florina.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "You didn't really meet him, but he's about as far back as you are, almost."
Razor: "'che."
KitOrbel: "You flatter, but I'm trying to be a good girl now. So, let's drop the pretense. I tell you that no matter what, we're probably going to send someone expendable into it as a test run, and you tell me what's going to happen to them before we test it. Especially if they'll be left a soulless twisted husk of their former selves..." *She giggles,* "Like you, actually."
Evil Wolfman: "Well, if you send me, I will probably have a much better time than anyone else, but that's why you never will send me. The Void would positively hate it though."
"No physical people to push around."
"He likes to use them as toys."
King Demon: "Void? Didn't we cause him to self destruct?"
Evil Wolfman: "It's a sick and twisted thing. True chaos worlders hate physicality. In the future, yes."
"This is the past of your world, however. He exists only here."
King Demon: "Oh, right, this is the past, I gotta remember that."
Evil Wolfman: "He is also rather powerless due to your powers. Less powerful than even me."
KitOrbel: "Timey-Whimy, demon. Stick to the program. Now what -would- happen to... Say... Xavier if he went in."
Evil Wolfman: "This world still bends to my will ever so slightly. You just suck up the oxygen because you appear annoyingly annoying with your time powers."
King Demon: "... Hi, Kitten."
Evil Wolfman: "Well, Xavier would..."
Metal Man (GM): Evil Wolfman begins laughing.
Evil Wolfman: "Ha... hahahaha... He's been on the edge of becoming one of us."
"If you sent him over there he would be completely corrupted and shed that useless physical form."
King Demon: "A hologram?"
Evil Wolfman: "Energy being. Chaos Energy Being."
"...It would end poorly for you. We do not need food, sleep, shelter or love."
"Without those to hold him to sanity, he could fully forsake your useless rituals."
"Perhaps he would steal my chair, but it would still be my vengeance."
King Demon: "Eh, I think he already forsook most of them."
KitOrbel: "..." *She taps her foot,* "What would happen if we sent someone like... Him." *She points at Demon.*
Evil Wolfman: "That's why he's so close to the edge."
Razor blinks a few times.
Evil Wolfman: "Demon?" *He smirks.* "A mere immortal demon... I believe he would be rejected. Sent back."
King Demon: "Yeah, I'm not even wanted by chaos... what a shocker..."
Evil Wolfman: "There's a pact between hell and our land. We don't mess with one another's beings outside of this interloper land. It's bad for business."
"If we fought then the annoying mortals would get away."
"Our finest people have determined that our forces are exactly equal, just as the disgusting order elemental and the slightly less disgusting good ones."
KitOrbel: "That doesn't surprise me. What about me, stepfather?"
King Demon: "Eh, chaos and order are both overrated anyway."
Evil Wolfman: "Oh, you could finally also shed your worthless form, although it would require some negotiation. I hear hell has a rather high price invested in you. I'm not sure I could afford that contract."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "This all makes me want to shoot things. Annoying planes and contracts. Where's the Goombas to shoot..."
King Demon: "You already shot them all."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "That's the problem!"
King Demon: "Well, the ones I didn't barbecue the other day, anyway..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I need new bloo--er, enemies--er, villains!"
Florina thought to herself as she tried and failed to keep up with this conversation: Just what did I get myself into? But... maybe if she had the chance to just make things and destroy other things without thinking too hard about it, she could live here comfortably...
Evil Wolfman: "You would really want to send Razor." *He would laugh.*
"Though each dimension is different, he is probably the only one who could actually keep his form." *He would laugh some more. Sounds trustworthy to me!* :V
KitOrbel: "..." *She tilts her head,* "Daddy don't play games with me. I want honesty."
King Demon: "You're asking someone with the word 'Evil' in their name for honesty?"
Evil Wolfman: "I don't know what his dimension's chaos realm is like, so I honestly couldn't tell you. ...It would just be highly amusing to find out. Heh heh heh heh heh heh."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Wasn't the X-Zone the realm of Chaos?"
Evil Wolfman: "As much as a bar named 'the Realm of Chaos' would be."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "But--"
Evil Wolfman: "It exists inside The Void, yes. It's still nothing more than a made up gibberish realm."
"You can't define any real physics on it."
King Demon: "Didn't we... oh, right, future."
KitOrbel: "Well he clearly has something invested in wanting us to send Razor there. Which means we probably shouldn't. Sorry daddy, I trust you as much as I can throw you. And I've never been one for brute strength."
Evil Wolfman: "As for the real details on how to get into the Realm of Chaos... that will cost you."
KitOrbel: "Define 'cost'."
Evil Wolfman: "I wish to ally with you, for I sense a great... *Shudders* order attempting to define the universe. Redefine it. Someone out there..."
"...And you are the best way to kill them."
King Demon: *Looks to Xavier* "Dammit, Metal, you got me all screwed up, what time zone are we in again?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "We're in the Bizarro Future. I went into a weird 2-dimensional version of reality and punched a bunch of weird Ivan Robotnik shaped UFOs to change us from a Good Future."
"...Which means we're in Season 3's post-era... before Season 4..."
"With a bunch of people from the future..."
"...I'm gonna call it, Messed Up Confusion, or MUC."
King Demon: "Oh..." *Shrugs* "I think I missed that part of the timeline the first time around."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yeah. Just call it Messed Up Confusion, it doesn't matter anymore."
KitOrbel: "Tell me who- or what you want taken care of. I want cards on the table before I agree to play my hand."
King Demon: "Cool, sounds like fun."
Evil Wolfman: "I'd tell you..." *He looks down.* "The feeling is a feeling. Not an exact. The foul beings of order protect their own. I can't get a name. I'm trapped in this BOX."
"I project a hologram of myself, but that is all my power. This infernal box is made out of Smash Power, so it can control ME. And that is disgusting."
King Demon: "Yeah... maybe you shouldn't have tried to destroy us."
Evil Wolfman: "You weren't supposed to win!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Tough luck. You thought they were all Alsan Questers. The real Questers will kick your @#$ any time of the week."
"Which is why I'm not entirely opposed to releasing you, if only because beating you up sounds fun."
KitOrbel: "Daddy, you know me. I'm like mom. I -enjoy- control. Give me a general direction if you can't give me names."
King Demon: "Yeah, you're also gonna end up like your mother if you keep going, KitOrbel."
KitOrbel: "Hush, I'm negotiating."
Evil Wolfman: "It's... most likely a man... they... have a device or devices... that are causing reality to be changed... they have... changed reality before... They... seek to kill those who cause chaos..."
"...And replace it with their own order."
"They seek to erase all of the forces such as Smash Power and rewrite it with their own."
King Demon looks to Xavier.
KitOrbel: "... Well, you've just given me a list of EVERY PERSON I'VE FOUGHT EVE- Waaait... Kill chaos, replace with their own..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Is it Illian?"
Evil Wolfman: "I don't know. I'm in a box."
KitOrbel: *She grabs her black notebook and sits on the table, legs crossed.* "No, no, no, no... Maybe, no, possible..."
Evil Wolfman: "I haven't left Also or this Planet long enough to know if you even still have a sun. You could at least stop holding me inside this force fielded box."
KitOrbel: "Xavier. Define what Borne and his cronies do when they take over an area for me!"
Florina slowly flew toward Xavier so she could whisper some questions once all of this was done. Until then, she continued to sip her second juicebox.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, they build up their own buildings, then they disarm everyone else."
King Demon: *Notices* "You got another box?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Alsan energy tends to drain everyone's powers as well... ...They then make the area boring... very boring..."
"Like... you can't even take out a super mushroom anymore."
KitOrbel: "Do they want to erase powers, like ours? Stamp them out of existence?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, Borne was making some sort of giant machine that was a trap so he could kill me, then complained about aliens or something..."
KitOrbel: "Borne's on the list. What did Garrick say he wanted."
Razor has been, well, listening, but is largely more interested in his sammich than anything Wolfman's said... including when he was mentioned...
Evil Wolfman hisses.
"Garrick killed Smash Power once."
"He brought in that being from the other world."
"He is always a possibility."
KitOrbel: "Garrick's on the list! What is Illian trying to do?"
King Demon: "Yeah... I'd kinda like to stomp a mudhole in him sometime..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "He wants me dead, and to use Magitek. He... no... wait."
"He sees Smash Power as a tool."
KitOrbel: "Not on the list!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "He certainly wouldn't try to kill me with it if it really was that abhorrent to him."
KitOrbel: "I need a white board I can gesture to emphatically."
Xavier Ridgecrest gestures emphatically at his dex.
Smash Dex: "White board ordered."
King Demon: "Sorry, I'm all out of summoning powers."
Metal Man (GM): Two Toads move in a Whiteboard.
KitOrbel: "Thank you, Xavier. Markers?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...I just like to shoot my lines into the board and buy new ones, but sure."
Metal Man (GM): Some Toads put whiteboard markers on the whiteboard.
Razor eyes KitOrbel briefly as he downs the last of his sandwich. Damn. Now he didn't have an excuse to be silent without looking broody.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Let me think..." *He thinks.* "...Hooray. Evil Wolfman might mean I get to... wait... no..." *He stares blankly.*
KitOrbel: *She grabs them and starts writing things down.* "Okay, list of qualifications. Kill chaotic beings, Replace chaos with order, want to stamp out things like Smash Energy. Possible suspects- Garrick and Borne. Any others you can think of who may fit the bill?"
Evil Wolfman: "Bah. Give in to your need to kill people, Xavier. It's not like Garrick is going to do us any good."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Nnnnno. I must hold the old Questers together. I can Duct Tape Garrick if he has problems."
King Demon: "Yeah, cuz Duct Tape fixes EVERYTHING! Including your coffee mug."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "All I need to do is tie him up with it and cover his mouth, but not his nose. Then Garrick can be alive."
KitOrbel: "Hush, Daddy. I'm on a roll. Xavier, can you think of anyone else you've fought who wants to get rid of Smash Energy?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Time Cops hate it. They hate me for using it. In fact they fear and loathe Smash Energy."
Florina finally whispers to Xavier. "What am I ordered to do now, young man? I'm afraid this... old mind isn't so used to dealing with large groups like this."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "However, they also appear to have left this realm."
KitOrbel: "They're on the list anyway." *she writes it down.*
Razor: "I would wager they'll be back..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Ahhhh... well, Florina... we're figuring out what I need to order you to do. You see, there are over twenty people who do bad things, we need to find out which is so bad they need to die first."
"Or... be duct taped..."
"Whatever is less difficult."
King Demon: "Superglue works too."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Hm. Who else messes with Smash Energy..."
Florina nodded. "Okay. Proceed."
KitOrbel: "... Who tried to 'improve' smash energy to make it less chaotic and harmful?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "That's what Illian would want to do. He believes it can be harnessed as a tool..."
"Oh... and the Gray Mann? I don't know."
"I heard some offer while I was on Alsa of Gray Energy or something."
"I was too busy infiltrating to really care."
"I think that's everybody..."
King Demon: "Gray Energy?"
Evil Wolfman: "The Time Cops... Autumnus is the only one with the power to do what I feel. I have no qualm with him, however."
"He and I tried to kill Valron, who tried to combine Smash Energy with Alsan Energy."
KitOrbel: "... Is that really everyone?"
Evil Wolfman: "He and Sloan... ...What was Sloan doing there..."
"I don't even know..."
King Demon: "Ugh, Sloan... I REALLY want to kill that guy..."
Evil Wolfman: "I was too busy trying to kill Valron to notice him. Sadly, Autumnus' powers fluctuated and I never got the chance to destroy Sloan."
King Demon: "Or at least give him a paint job."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Somebody mentioned the name of 'Sloan' being detected near that hole too!"
Razor: "You know... honestly? Everything I've heard says that Sloan is the most invariably douchey guy in the lot... if we could deal with him, I think EVERYONE would thank us..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Dr. Light, yeah. I get the feeling, yes. We should just find and kill him."
"Nobody likes him."
"I don't even know who he is and he sounds annoying!"
"...Or maybe I just am kill-happy from not getting enough kills."
King Demon: "GLADLY!"
KitOrbel: "I'm pretty sure you're just being Kill Happy. You kinda always are."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "But... but... Razor hates him too! Razor told me not to kill Garrick..."
Razor: "...I don't actually know the guy either. He just sounds like an ass."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Surely I can kill Sloan too... dammit."
King Demon: "He looks like a fraggin roll of Life Savers."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Tell me more about this Sloan, Demon."
King Demon: "Or a Vegas casino..." *Shrugs.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I want to eat the life savers of his life and rob the casino of his annoyingness!"
KitOrbel: "Wait, the wintergreen kind or the fruit kind? Because those have pineapple and I -hate- pineapple..."
King Demon: "DEFINITELY fruit kind. I swear if that guy ever wore something that actually matched it'd be a damn miracle."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Weird clothes... always around doing weird things... Wait a minute... Red Text should know."
"He'll tell me! ...God. I'm a telephone operator. I guess that was my true lot in life."
Metal Man (GM): He dials in.
Red Text: "...What in the world is this assembly of people, Xavier?"
King Demon: "Oh, yeah, he would. He had more than a few run ins with ol' Five Flavor."
Red Text: "I thought you didn't have Questers!"
King Demon: "Hey, Texty!"
Metal Man (GM): The British Man in the top hat stares even more at the hologram of Evil Wolfman.
Red Text: "And what is he doing there!"
Razor: "Oh, hey there. He's... you know, honestly, I don't know why he's still here. Can we turn him off?"
Metal Man (GM): Then he stares at an empty part of the room.
KitOrbel: "RT~<3" *She grins and waves.*
Red Text: "And what is that dragon made of gel doing over there?"
King Demon: "Yeah, sure, where's the off button on this thing?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "What dragon made of goo?"
Evil Wolfman: "...I can turn myself off."
Metal Man (GM): His hologram turns off.
King Demon: "... Oh, there it is." *Shrugs and returns his attention to RT.*
Gelato: *Cheep?*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Wait, what?" *Continues to stare where Red Text was looking.*
Florina "I should get a better flavour next time to memorize... maybe blueberry juice will taste a lot better. Or maybe a blueberry and blackberry mix? Alchemy can be exciting..."
Red Text: "Your guess is as good as me. Now, did you call me, or was this some bizarre prank phone conference call?"
King Demon: *Shrugs.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "There's a guy named Sloan! Tell me what color his shoes are!"
Red Text: "Green."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "What the hell?"
Gelato: *A tiny, clear goo dragon waddles up to the group, promptly sitting on KitOrbel's shoe.*
KitOrbel: "..." *She blinks and moves her foot.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "That and the dragon out of thin air appearing are the two second weirdest things to have happened today. Now, what is Sloan... and why is there a goo dragon in my Big Room?"
Gelato: *Splat.*
Red Text: "Well, I... don't know the second one, but the first one involves one of Borne's men."
Razor: "...did you fire the janitor?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Mack? No. But he does only have one eye."
King Demon: *Sees the goo dragon* "Ooooh, dessert!"
Gelato: *It promptly looks up at Demon, chirping and twittering at him.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "On second thought, probably not the best idea if I want him to clean up everything thoroughly. Then again, most of the messes aren't sentient."
King Demon: "What do you mean you're not made of Jello?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Unless I accidentally created life that time I irradiated the orange juice in the fridge."
Gelato: *Tweet!*
KitOrbel: "... Did I just get a Magical Girl Mascot? Where the frig was THAT in my contract?"
Razor: "...pretty sure it's implied, KitOrbel."
Red Text: "Now... Sloan is... a..." *Stares at the dragon* "...he is a man in strange clothes... he... is trying to make you and Illian kill one another."
King Demon: "Wait... you had a contract?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Illian made KitOrbel sign a contract?"
KitOrbel: "No, Xavier."
King Demon: "Metal! Where's my contract? I need a pay schedule!"
Gelato: *Onto KitOrbel's shoe and beyond! Maybe even to her shoulder.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "What do you mean, pay? I thought you loved being in here so much it was your payment only to be here!"
King Demon: "I thought I was getting a billion coins... and an open kitchen."
KitOrbel: "My magical girl contract. Remember? Wand, five minute long transformation sequence, goofy looking mini-skirt outfit... WHY IS MY MASCOT A DRAGON MADE OF GOO?!" >.<
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes! You are. In the year 348372."
"It's right there. In the fine print."
King Demon: "Oh, ok. That's not that long then."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. Yes it isn't."
Gelato: *And on to licking KitOrbel on the ear.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Be careful! You don't know where her ear has been! ...Er I mean, why is it licking your ear?"
Red Text: "...Sloan's plan involves making you fight Illian, then killing both you and Illian when you're weak. I assume that's what you wanted to check? Rinith is here too, sometime he should come over. He can help you with this when he's not so busy."
King Demon: "What? When did he get a Money in the Bank contract?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I didn't give Rinith a contract. I just told him he could save the universe and he said 'OK.' It's a lot cheaper that way."
King Demon: "I meant Sloan."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Oh."
Red Text: "Sloan has some nefarious plan. You were all so oblivious. Now you're asking me for it. Something must be up."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "A giant hole in reality."
Red Text: "Oh."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Is he behind it?"
Red Text: "That doesn't really sound like his doing. He was much more... ...you and Illian fighting... dying... you know."
"He isn't The Void."
Razor: "Hey, oblivious? I don't know about them, but I kinda take offense to that." *He quickly shakes his head.* "We think he's involved somehow, but really we just want to go kick his ass at this point."
Red Text: "I hate him too. ...Do you know where he is? I don't."
Gelato: *KitOrbel's head!*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well, KitOrbel, do you know where Sloan is? Or who he is?"
King Demon: "Actually, no, we don't, that's why we were asking you about him."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Otherwise we're all tapped out it seems..."
Red Text: "Hmmmm."
King Demon: "And while we're at it, you have any sunglasses we can use when we fight him?"
Red Text: "I can't track his devices. Because that'd allow him to track mine. Sunglasses... yes."
"Stylish sunglasses."
Metal Man (GM): He takes out John Lennon sunglasses.
KitOrbel: *She's trying to figure out why she's got a goo dragon for a mascot.* "Seriously... This isn't even fair..." *She pulls out her compact and starts pressing buttons...* "Where's the Mascot clause..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "It's okay. You can get a shelf, like I have!"
Metal Man (GM): Xavier points to a shelf. A still-sleeping blue Kirby is on it.
Gelato: *Chirp.*
King Demon: "Oh, there's where the marshmallow went."
KitOrbel: "... After several days of practice with your new power, you may be allowed to take on a Mascot... If you do not choose one before the end of the first month, one will be provided for- FUCK!" >.<
Xavier Ridgecrest: "He wakes up occasionally. In between gorging on food."
Gelato: *It tumbles down onto the compact's buttons, splattering and reforming.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Now I have a strange witch-being... no wait, that's another Quester."
Razor: "...you mean he sleeps while he eats, and then wakes up in-between?"
KitOrbel: "AUGH! NO! You'll ruin it! Bad- thing... Geeze, I need to name you, don't I..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. It's frightening."
Metal Man (GM): Gibby sleep-eats a pineapple whole while Xavier says this.
Razor: "Y'know, KitOrbel, you could still eat him. Or something. Or, I mean, kill it with fire. This is a usual solution to things that annoy us here still, right?"
King Demon: "..." *Hands Gibby a bag of Smores.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "You could feed it to Gibby!"
Metal Man (GM): *Gibby eats it, including the packaging.*
KitOrbel: *She tries to get the goo off her compact.* "Do you know how many fees I had to pay to get this thing? It's a replica of Ami's from Sailor Moon! It was EXPENSIVE!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Don't get your hand too close to Gibby's mouth though."
King Demon: "Great, a cannibal..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Sometimes I feed him my junk mail and he gains powers from it."
King Demon: "Oooh, Papercut Kirby."
Gelato: *It peels right off and gets stuck back to the dragon, as it prances up KitOrbel's arm onto her shoulder.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Wait a minute. Here's the answer!"
KitOrbel: "Just- stay there on my shoulder. Okay? While I name you..."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier points his Smash Dex at the goo dragon.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "What is this!"
Smash Dex: "Some sort of sentient being made of goo."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Duh!"
Gelato: *Cheep!*
King Demon: "Nice to see your Dex has gotten smarter..."
Gelato: *It settles down and relaxes.*
Smash Dex: "They called me SIMBER, then Joel. Now they call me Smarter. Eventually they might actually figure out I don't know everything."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Silence! I must think on how to kill a man I don't know the location to! ... ... ..."
"... ... ..."
King Demon: "That is Silence?"
KitOrbel: "Did you try the place where lost socks go, Xavier?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Silence! Silence... Silence? We could... ask Silence!"
KitOrbel: *She pokes the goo dragon on her shoulder.* "... You're actually kinda cute..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "...Oh no. More phone calls. Well... maybe!"
Metal Man (GM): A weird stick figure with Picard's head appears on the screen.
???: "What?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "WHERE IS SLOAN."
King Demon: "Oh, wow, you got unfroze."
???: "Who are you people?"
Razor: "..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I want to know where Sloan is!"
Gelato: *It chirrups and licks KitOrbel's finger, doing an excellent job of ignoring the insanity around itself.*
???: "What is with your transmission? Everyone is three-dimensional!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "And you're two-dimensional! ..." *Glances to his glowing time device* "...Oops."
???: "Silence! You will not call me like this, loafish three-dimensional beings!"
Metal Man (GM): *Screen turns off.*
KitOrbel: *She smiles a bit,* "I do need to name you if you're going to be my mascot, huh..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Wait a minute..."
Gelato: *Purr.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "That's it! My Time device can tap into the time stream... ...well, that's kind of unrelated really."
Florina just watched and listened in amazement.
King Demon: "It's a time device, isn't it SUPPOSED to tap into the time stream?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I can read what's on the other side of the invisible wall if we reprogram my device. Then... then... ... ..."
Razor: "As long as it doesn't make it bigger. Or explode."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes... the Valhalla! I can crash the Valhalla into it!"
King Demon: "Oooh, sounds like fun!"
Gelato: *Tweet?*
Red Text: "What is this invisible barrier?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "You're still on?"
KitOrbel: "You seem like a Sapphire... Or a Ruby... Maybe Emerald... Diamond? Pearl?"
Red Text: "You forgot to hang up. Then you did something so absurd, I began to wonder if reality had melted."
King Demon: *Looks to KitOrbel* "It's a pokemon game?"
Red Text: "Give me your data on this wall."
Metal Man (GM): Xavier presses a button.
Red Text: "... That wall is an Ancient Energy field. It is likely one of Sloan's."
Gelato: *The dragon crawls back down into KitOrbel's hand. It feels squishy, but non-sticky, like a glob of Silly Putty.*
Red Text: "Don't crash your ship into it."
Razor: "I told him that was a bad idea already. A while ago."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "But... I'm tired of talking!"
Red Text: "...Let me destroy it."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Huh?"
King Demon: "Oooh, Texticular destruction."
Red Text: "I've been looking for Sloan for years. If this is him, then I can destroy the wall and you can destroy whatever is inside."
"That sound easy enough to you?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. It's time to actually do something!"
King Demon: "Sweet! Explsions!"
KitOrbel: "... What do you like? I'm kinda fond of pearl..." *she smiles and puts away her compact to pet it...*
Red Text: "Open a view of the wall. I will destroy it. You will be able to warp inside after the explosion clears... and back out. The field has a very specific vulnerability."
Razor: "Jolly co-operation. Sounds like a plan to me..."
Florina "...Okay. This all sounds acceptable to these old ears." Again, she didn't look a day over 20.
King Demon: "... Just how old are you anyway?"
Gelato: *The dragon starts crawling around on KitOrbel, apparently wanting to explore the area.*
Razor is well aware that every single person in this room is not actually their apparent age.
Florina "481. I think, anyway... it's been so long."
Gelato: *And off down the hall!*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I am 23823 922 39823 8923 892382389238923328 Rumplestiltskin's old."
King Demon: "Ah, that's not old!" *Smirks.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "To be honest, I lost track after I went back in time and relived my entire life a couple times. You guys get prepared, then I shall set up the warp."
"Also, Florina, we have decided our target."
"Evil guys who serve and eviler guy who wears bad clothes."
Metal Man (GM): The image soon shows a satellite showing up...
Florina wrote this down on her juicebox. "Evil guys who serve eviler guy who wears bad clothes... got it."
Razor watches that screen curiously.
Metal Man (GM): A satellite with a huge ray gun sticking out of it appears...
Gelato: *Still striding on down to the kitchen.*
Metal Man (GM): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78B5W2aq0tU (Diamonds are Forever / Blofeld's Laser )
It slowly orbits into position, around a slightly displaced invisible-ish field.
Red Text: "Hm... Yes. He thought that being invisible and in plain sight would hide him from me. Too bad for him. You bumbled into whatever this is."
KitOrbel: "H-hey!" *She looks back at the others and sighs,* "Dammit..."
Red Text: "Yes..."
Metal Man (GM): The gun then aligns.
Red Text: "All systems are go."
Metal Man (GM): The laser then glows... and fires a massive ray into the wall.
Red energy corrupts and rips into the field.
The outline of a massive space station can be seen, as the red energy slowly rips apart its cloak.
There are lights on it, but they then go dim. The station has apparently taken heavy damage...
Razor: "Well, important stuff happening, KitOrbel. Let the little guy run into Mewtwo or something. We should get ready to kick some ass."
Metal Man (GM): There is still a bit of a rainbow glow going into the station.
Red Text: "Unfortunately, that's all I can do. It's up to you to destroy the rest of it. ...And don't ram it, it'll explode and destroy you."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "To the warp room!"
Metal Man (GM): The satellite flies away before the station can restore power to its meager anti-spaceship lasers.
The station fires a few lasers in vain as it flies away.
Xavier marches to the Warp Room.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "This way, Questers. It's kicking things in the rear time!"
Florina lazily floats her way to the indicated location. She really must not like walking or doing anything physical.
Xavier Ridgecrest: *Goes to fire up the machine* "What? What is a Net Split error? Work you stupid machine!"
Metal Man (GM): Hmmmmm...
*Long netsplit.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: *Goes to fire up the machine* "What? What is a Net Split error? Work you stupid machine!"
*Kicks machine* "There... that should do it. Everyone ready? ...KitOrbel?"
"There it goes again..."
*Kicks machine* "There... that should do it. Everyone ready? ...KitOrbel? There it goes again..."
KitOrbel: "I'm ready." >.>;
Gelato: *Nom nom nom.*
Razor: "Here's hoping for the best..."
Metal Man (GM): NOTE: Will be slow. Project suddenly needing my help when they said they didn't earlier. Will continue anyway, if slowed.
School project. Anyway...
Everyone steps into the warp.
WARP
Everyone reappears in a room full of knocked over tables and a dead guy.
A dead guy who appears to have been wearing a bizarre turquoise set of armor with red armbands.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Ow. My eyes."
Metal Man (GM): The door out has been... sealed shut.
This room is darkened. Messages play in the background.
Razor: "...what a mess..."
???: "Intruders on level Tango Alpha. Door sealing complete. Do NOT allow the Energy Room to be taken! Prepare the station for self-detonation!"
Florina "...How curious."
Razor: "...so they're just gonna... blow the place up?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Some sort of secrecy thing I guess?"
Gelato: *The dragon runs in behind the group, cheeping up a storm.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "So... now what..."
Metal Man (GM): The room has... the door, a computer on the ground, and dead guy.
Razor kneels down next to the dead guy, rifling his corpse looking for an ID of some kind.
KitOrbel: "..." *She sighs,* "Brilliant..." *She looks at the computer to see if there's a way to hack it.*
Metal Man (GM): You find his SLOANID--including an ID number.
The computer is a bit damaged, and unplugged.
Gelato: *Back to KitOrbel's shoulder as the mascot dragon.*
Razor plucks it off the body. "Well, all suspicions were right, definitely Sloan's stuff here. Now we just need to get out of the room."
Metal Man (GM): The door appears to be locked.
It has a glowing symbol in the center of it.
KitOrbel: "..." *She frowns and looks for an Air Duct.*
Razor goes to examine the symbol.
Metal Man (GM): You find one. It's the size of a golf ball in diameter.
The symbol is a circle. At the center seems to be some place to push the button to open the door.
Gelato: *The dragon blinks and chirps at the air duct, peering inside.*
Metal Man (GM): The duct seems to go a ways into another room.
Florina "Can't we just break it down...?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I would, but they appear to be thinking about it first."
Gelato: "Cheep! Cheep!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: *Kicks the door* "Ow... it doesn't feel like that kind of door."
Razor: "Oi, Mets! What do you think of this? Never seen tech like this..." *He looks to the odd new girl.* "Breaking it down, even if we could, might cause explosive decompression..."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I think... ...this tech is weird."
Gelato: *The dragon tries to wiggle into the duct.*
Metal Man (GM): Xavier tries to open the door, while the dragon fits into the duct.
And I never expected to type a sentence that weird.
The door doesn't open.
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I dunno. Feels locked to me. Maybe I can try to pick it open."
Razor: "...think this guy's ID could help?"
Metal Man (GM): Demon: Demon would be here as well, having followed the others.
Gelato: *It peers out at KitOrbel, waiting for further instructions.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Sure. Uhhh... now where to put it... Try... poking the door maybe?"
"I don't know. Futuretech depends on the culture that made it."
KitOrbel: "..." *She frowns,* "Hey, little thing... Go into the next room and see if you can open the door."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "My culture was much more direct than this."
Gelato: "Chirp!" *It starts scuttling through the vent.*
King Demon: "Yeah, blow shit up until it explodes."
Florina "Oh... okay." She seemed kind of lazy and not too familiar with how all of this worked. Now she decided to hang back and observe, like this was her first time in the outside world.
Razor actually tries poking the button spot with the ID.
King Demon looks at the door searching for any lock or something he could overheat.
Metal Man (GM): It changes color and opens.
Gelato: *Wriggle wriggle.*
Metal Man (GM): A bunch of guys with guns are on the other side of the door.
Soldier: "H-halt!"
King Demon: "... That works too... Uh, close the door?"
Soldier 2: "Intruders!"
Metal Man (GM): The dragon finds the duct ends in some sort of air conditioning unit.
Possibly over the hallway.
KitOrbel: "..." *She cracks her knuckles and grins,* "Hey there boys..." <3
Xavier Ridgecrest: "You halt first!"
Razor: "...hi." *He twists his lips into a grin.* "I don't think we've been introduced."
Gelato: *Any brackets or screws?*
Soldier: "This is a... top secret s-station!"
Metal Man (GM): Yes, some in the corners.
Florina "So are these the bad guys you told me about, Xavier? The ones who work for the guy with bad clothes?"
Soldier 2: "You will be arrested!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes. These are the guys."
King Demon: "Oh, good... something to roast."
Soldier: "You aren't allowed h-here!"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "What, and your laser guns are going to defeat all of us?"
Soldier: "Y-n-no."
Soldier 2: "Of course!"
KitOrbel: *She starts clapping,* "Perfect! Perfect! Gold stars for all of you! Now, if this had been a REAL invasion, you'd have wanted to shoot on sight."
Metal Man (GM): Soldier 2 aims at you with the laser gun he has. Soldier 1 doesn't know whether to stay or run away.
Gelato: *The dragon starts joyfully removing the screws. Things to gnaw on!*
KitOrbel: "But, you did pretty well. Is this your first test drill?" ^^
Soldier 2: "Test drill? They didn't say--"
Metal Man (GM): A panel from the ceiling falls off.
Then an AC unit.
It brains Soldier 2.
Soldier 1 runs away screaming.
Soldier 2 just sorta slumps to the ground.
Razor winces slightly. "...ouch."
KitOrbel: "... God that was easy."
Florina "...okay."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Yes! More death! Wait a minute, I didn't even cause it!'"
Gelato: *The dragon peers down from the hole on the ceiling, chewing on a screw.*
KitOrbel: *She puts out her hands for the dragon to fall into.* "C'mon little thing."
Gelato: *Falling down--splat.*
Razor: "...and the little goo thing scores first blood. Now I've seen everything."
KitOrbel: "The trick is confusing them enough to shoot first."
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Well... we have a station to experiment with."
Metal Man (GM): The room on the left is DATA ROOM, and the door is locked.
The room on the right is CAFETERIA. It is open. You hear people inside.
The room ahead is... more hallways.
Razor: "Well... where to?"
Xavier Ridgecrest: "I'm not sure. Maybe I'm hungry for more shooting."
Gelato: *The dragon reforms in KitOrbel's hands, offering the screw from the AC unit to her.*
Razor: "Food and shooting are in the same place, Mets."
Gelato: *Bahahahaha.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: "Time to kill things." *He'd whip out his TT33 and flip open the door.* "HELLOOOOOOOOOO OKLAHOMA!"
Gelato: "Cheeeeeeeeeeeep!"
Metal Man (GM): ...And we might want to pause or something. Not only should I finish those last tidbits of the battle system, but also the netsplits ..And we might want to pause or something. Not only should I finish those last tidbits of the battle system, but also the netsplits.
Razor: "...I've been aching for a good scrap. Let's rock."
Metal Man (GM): ...And we might want to pause or something. Not only should I finish those last tidbits of the battle system, but also the netsplits. (In case you didn't see it... again...)